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How To Disagree Well


bonesiii

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Yo yo yall.

Longtime readers of my blog might recall I have admitted that I have a problem with being condescending when disagreeing, and that I'm trying to improve. Well, I have something to report.

I'm still struggling to find the right words to describe it, but I think at last I know what "it" is. I've tried to put it into a very concise list of "rules." I'll list them by themselves first.


How to Disagree Well

1 Listen fairly
2 Avoid negative labels
3 Be concise
4 Speak your mind


(If you like acronyms to help remember, "LABS".)


I don't want to do a giant blog entry today, but I do have more to say about these, so instead I'm going to expand on each of the four rules in seperate blog entries to come. :)

Obviously, when dealing with people, nothing is simple. These might not work in all situations, and there's a lot more I could add (much of it I've already repeated often though). But I've come to believe that if we all embrace and truly live out these four simple rules, the rest will flow naturally and we'll all be able to have a better community experience. ^_^

And if you're wondering, yes, this is somewhat sparked by recent BZP events over the last year or so; these are four very important principles I have seen barely anyone saying much, and I feel it's time for a reminder. :) On the other hand, I've found them to work well in all walks of life whereever I have a disagreement, so, try it out regardless!

At this point, I'm really in the "trying this" stage, but so far it seems to be working enough that I felt it was time to speak up. :)

Perhaps more importantly, I've collected scientific research, psychological principles, and sound logic to back these things up. Stay tuned for more in-depth looks at these things.

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I'm afraid my problem is I do the last one too much. I end up insulting people because usually I express my thoughts in a way that seems like I'm explaining a complex topic like it was rather simple.

 

The problem is, to me, it usually is simple. Things that makes sense to me often end up being what confuses others.

I must agree with this. I get into trouble with my teachers of such simple matters like algebra and physics.

 

If you don't believe me, I'm serious.

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