Yes, you read the blog entry title right. I'm quitting BZPower.
Go and yell WHYYYYYYYY!!! at me and scream your heads off now. Let the panic wash over you like a big bucket of ice water.
Now let me reassure you, please, I shall not just cut and leave all of the loose ends to rot like a dead tree like some other people I happen to know. That is a terrible thing to do, and I shall not do it. Before I leave, I will do the following things:
1. The Categorical GregF Reference will be finished.
2. Mafia XXIX will run.
3. Tales of Externix will be finished.
4. The contest I started will be finished, judged, and shipped as expected.
5. The HF RPG will be resolved, minimized, or handed off. I will be running Mission #4 as normal, and I want the players who want to continue it to be able to continue it. I expect that it will take a considerable amount of time before I can pull myself out of it (several months)
There is a few other private things and minor details I will be attending to. What you will see change immediately is that I will stop doing things that are NOT related to 1-5 above, and I'm asking that you should not pressure me to take on more of them. I know that some of you make it a practice of not listening, but now is not the time to use that skill.
If there is something legitimate that I forgot about, however, do bring it up.
* * *
Some of you might be wondering why.
The reason why has nothing to do with life or the demands of college work or any of that nonsense. I refuse to blame external circumstances for my problems. I always found that to be pathetic - you make time for what is important to you. You use the time you have for what is important to you. In fact, I could indeed balance college and BZPower easily enough - I have done so easily for the past 3-4 years.
What I have found is that there are things more important to me than BZPower. In fact, I have found that BZPower is now at odds with my purpose in life and existence. (Some fools would call that an existential crisis - I think that too is the wrong definition. An existential crisis is when you discover your life has no meaning and you try to patch it. I have always known that my life has meaning, so need for that. What changed was understanding what the meaning is. The question "What is the meaning of life?" has a different meaning for each person. )
This was not a change in me as much as a change in BZPower. I didn't change to not fit BZPower; BZPower has changed so it no longer fits me. I don't blame BZPower or anything, or even the people who left to make it this way. I'm going to miss some friends anyway, who didn't leave.
But I can't sit here and watch my more important projects go by the wayside and watch my life slowly drain away. As old Vakama said, it is time to move on. Or, you know, whoever said it.