Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'Bionicle Fanfic'.
Found 2 results
Lord Frezon posted a topic in ComediesBionicle news at 6:00 Solek: Release the hounds? Wow, Frezon is the worst writer ever. Who even uses that horrible quote anyway? Shadow leech (SL): You fool! Release the hounds! (A swarm of wiener dogs attack Solek, yipping hysterically) Announcer (AN): Really? You’re trying to kill Solek already? It’s the first chapter and there hasn’t even been any character development yet. How can you possibly know what your former character was like? Cameraman (CM): How did Solek know to be rude? Ehlek: Touché. Carapar: Ehlek, don’t use foreign languages. They hurt my head. And when my head hurts I tend to hurt the heads of others. Producer (PR): But seriously, who the heck told our characters what their former versions were like? Weapon: I blame my lawyer. It’s easier that way. Lawyer: who blamed me? I’ll sue you!!11!1! Kirop: Huh?!?!? What was up with the exclamation points? Carapar: Up? Okay, you can go up! (Smacks Kirop into the roof of the dome, he is annihilated by the hovering Eldrazi titans) SL: I sense the continuation of a disturbing trend. Solek: What, Kirop dying? No one cared in the beginning and no one will care now. PR: Wait a moment, where are those two guest stars? * El flashbacko, Inception music playing* Hammox: OH MY GOD< WE”RE GOING TO DIE!! (Pit of lava opens under them) Osram: WHY GOD WHY???? *End el flashbacko* AN: Seriously? Frezon is nearly fluent in Spanish, and he continues to butcher it? What is wrong with him? Frezon: many, many things. SL: I have more. Things wrong with me, that is. (Kirop hits ground, makes impact crater) Ehlek: Hey, we have 400 words. That’s enough, right? Solek: No, you brain dead fool. The word processor is counting Frezon’s carp intro in its calculations. Honestly, don’t you ever break the fourth wall? Carapar: hey, isn’t this Bionicle NEWS? CM: Way to get us back on topic, crab boy. (Laser emitted from Carapar’s jaws, CM steaming) owie. PR: Seriously, we should tell some sort of news. Ehlek: sure. This is the first day of the last day. Yes, it’s true, it’s December 21, 2012. Let’s turn to our sports guy to see how things are going. Carapar: Silly Ehlek, I annihilated Brutaka last comedy. Also, Trix are for kids. AN: Please shoot me. Or at least end this chapter. Weapon: Your wish is my command. Click click boom! -Commercial break- Was AN just shot? Will Carapar have ultimate power? Will I ever break out of this stupid mold of asking three questions at the end of each of my chapters? Find out next time on…. BIONICLE NEWS! !!!! Yeah, random, whatever. Stay tuned for better content.
The Greatest Bionicle Fanfic Ever Written
TNTOS posted a blog entry in blogs_blog_1200Nine years ago, my brothers and I collaborated to write the single greatest Bionicle fanfic ever written. True, most of us didn't know how to write at the time and we had absolutely no experience writing any sort of fiction at all, but gosh darn it we didn't let those minor inconveniences get in the way of us writing the greatest Bionicle fanfic ever written (and yes, the italics are totally necessary. Why? Because it's the greatest Bionicle fanfic ever written that's why). You must understand that this is the greatest Bionicle fanfic ever written. It's a deep postmodern look into the 2004 story, with biting political satire and a daring experimental literary form. It's quite short, but I can assure you that this story will become an instant classic, beloved by all Bionicle fans and lovers of great literature (in fact, I believe that this fic alone will show LEGO why Bionicle should come back, but that's getting ahead of myself). Enough of my rambling. The only way to understand why this is the greatest Bionicle fanfic ever written is to read it yourself. Unfortunately, the original story was written on paper. Thankfully, I have the original copy on hand, so I shall faithfully reproduce it down to the last period and comma in this blog post. Read on: (WARNING: This is the greatest Bionicle fanfic ever written. If you are allergic to great literature and/or achieving enlightenment, then you may proceed.) (WARNING #2: The original story is written in ALL-CAPS. Therefore, in order to accurately convey the atmosphere of the original piece, I have transcribed the entire story with caps lock on. My apologies to your eyes.) BIONICLE: TALE OF THE MATOA CHAPTER ONE GATHERED FRIENDS, LISTEN TO A NEW CHAPTER OF THE BIONICLE IN THE TIME BEFORE TIME IN THE GLORIOUS CITY OF METRU-NUI, THERE WERE TWO MATORAN PO-TU AND LE-TU. PO-TU IS A PO-MATORAN LE-TU IS A LE-MATORAN. ONE DAY WHEN THE MATORAN WERE CALLED TO THE GREAT COLLISEUM THEY WITNESSED THE SIX TOA THAT PROVED THEMSELVES AS TOA TURAGA DUMA SAID THAT THEY WERE IMPOSTERS RESPONSIBLE FOR TOA LIKAHNS DEMISE ALL OF A SUDDEN THE MATORAN STARTED HATING THE TOA ALL EXCEPT FOR PO-TU AND LE-TU PO-TU THOUGHT UP AN IDEA. "WHAT IF WE BECOME TOA" HE SAID "THAT'S A GREAT IDEA" SAID LE-TU. SO THEY WENT BACK TO PO-METRU BECAUSE PO-MATORANS ARE BUILDERS PO-TU WORKED ALL DAY AND THEN FINALLY THESE NEW SUITS WERE FINISHED THEY BOTH PUT THEM ON AND THEN THEY BECAME THE MATOA. SO THEY ADVENTURED THROUGH METRU-NUI AND THEN THE TAXES AND GAS PRICES ROSE! SO THEY DECIDED TO LEAVE METRU-NUI SO THEY WENT NORTH AND SO LE-TU NOTICED SOME ICEBERGS AND IN THEM WERE FROSTELUS WHO BROKE OUT WHEN THEY SAW THEM THEY CAME TOWARD PO-TU AND LE-TU. "AHHH!" SAID PO-TU AND LE-TU THEN THE FROSTELUS DESTROYED THEIR BOAT THE LAST THING PO-TU SAW WAS LE-TU GOING DEEPER INTO THE WATER PO-TU AWOKE ON AN ISLAND HE GOT UP THIS IS WHERE I'M GOING TO STOP NARRATING SO PO-TU AND LE-TU CAN TALK PO-TU SAID: "WHAT IS THIS ISLAND?" "BEETS ME" SAID LE-TU WHO HAD ALSO WASHED UP ON SHORE ???: "YOU ARE ON THE ISLAND OF MECHA-NUI" BOTH TOA: "AHHH!" PO-TU: "WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT DO YOU SMELL LIKE CHEETOES?" ???: "MY SNACKING PREFERENCES AREN'T IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW BUT WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS MY NAME I AM TURAGA MUH-KU" (INSERT CHOIR GOING "AAHHHHHH") I'M BACK AND I'M ALSO THE NARRATOR AND SO TURAGA MUH-KU SHOWS THE TOA AROUND THE ISLAND AND THEN THEY SEE A MATORAN PO-TU ASKED: "WHO IS THAT?" TURAGA MUH-KU: "THAT'S REE-REE" AND THEN THEY NOTICED ANOTHER MATORAN AND THIS TIME LE-TU ASKED WHO IT WAS "THAT'S FORREST" SAID TURAGA MUH-KU. FORREST: "HI" AND SO TURAGA MUH-KU TOLD THE STORY OF THE TATOOA HE TOLD THE TWO MA-TOA THAT THE TATOOA WAS A MEMBER OF THE BROTHERHOOD OF MAKUTA -TNTOS-