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Case File #479: As Sweet as Honey It was a bright spring morning in Lego City, quite similar to the bright spring mornings they’d been having for the past week. But this was a different sort of spring morning. Because this spring morning was a special spring morning. A super special, delightful spring morning. Which was why Frank Honey was sprawled out on his desk in a fit of dismay. Around him, the officers of the Lego City Police Department were busy typing out reports, directing traffic, and plotting to grab the last doughnut out of the box in the break room before Chief Dunby could. Most of the officers were barely planning anything past their lunch break, let alone the end of the day. But Frank just sat with his head on his desk, desperately trying to think. There had to be something... “Mornin’ Frank.” A voice, rich with a smooth southern accent, called. Frank sat upright as the object of his lack of thought process walked past his desk. Ellie Phillips ran the evidence locker, and was the main computer expert on the police force. She was also, in Frank’s humble opinion, the prettiest woman he’d even seen, his mother being the single exception. Although she was wearing her standard uniform of a white shirt, black pants, and police badge, there was something a little extra special about her today. Was it her short black hair, held back with a bright blue hair pin? Or her eyes, which seemed to glisten with a inner light? Or her lips, which moved almost hypnotically...? “Frank? Frank?” “Huh, What?” Frank said, shaken out of his reverie. He looked around. Ellie was gone as fast as she had been there. Chase McCain, the person calling his name, looked at him from across the row of desks with a concerned look. “Do you have any extra form 104-Bs? It’s the one with the Robbers up a tree after a car crash.” “Hm? Uh...” Frank said, looking around his desk. For some odd reason, the higher-ups decided that since Frank was naturally bad at police work, he was automatically good at paperwork. Unfortunately, they were quite mistaken. Frank’s desk was the messiest and most disorganized out of every other desk in the office. “I don’t think so.” Chase sighed and turned back to the reports he’d been saddled with after a week of arrests. “Thanks, Frank.” Frank opened his mouth to reply, but Chase was already deeply engrossed in a report about a pursuit that ended with five robbers hiding up a tree after crashing their car into the city pound. That had been an interesting mess to sort out, for sure. Frank was just lucky that animals were naturally friendly with him. He’d kept them on the other side of the yard while Studsky and Clutch hauled the robbers out of the tree. He sighed. If only he were that good with people. His problem? It was Ellie’s Birthday. Ellie, the highlight of his life. And he had no idea what to get her. He didn’t want to buy another technological trinket he was sure to break before he even got it wrapped, or another rubber bone for her dog. He wanted to get her something special. Something.... “FRANK!” Chief Dunby yelled, storming out of his office. Around him, Officers dove for cover. Even Chase had the sense to realize his coffee cup was suddenly empty and leave for a refill. Frank, however, was so lost in thought that he didn’t realize the Chief was hunting for him until he was standing right over his desk. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE THIS TIME?!” “Um... What have I done this time, Chief?” Frank asked uncertainly. “THAT’S WHAT I’M ASKING YOU!” Dunby yelled. “THE CITY POUND JUST CALLED. THEY WANT TO KNOW WHY ALL OF THEIR DOGS ARE CHASING A TOY MOUSE!” Oh... Right. He’d used a little toy he’d found in the dumpster behind the pound to keep the dogs distracted. Guess he’d forgotten to turn it off when all the robbers had been taken care of. “Um...” Frank said, his thoughts still split between Ellie and the Dogs. “I couldn’t tell you, chief. “WELL YOU BETTER GET BACK OVER THERE AND FIX IT, OR YOUR CAREER IS TOAST, HONEY!” “Honey! That’s it!” Frank exclaimed as the seldom-used bulb in his head lit up. “Thanks! You’re the best, Chief!” He jumped up and hugged the chief with a huge bear hug. Then he ran out the door out towards the parking lot, leaving scattered papers in his wake. At that point, Chase came back with a fresh coffee and the last doughnut. “What was that about?” He asked. Dunby didn’t reply, unless you count taking Chase’s doughnut and eating it angrily a response. *** It was mid-morning by the time Frank reached Bluebell National park. After several failed attempts to get his car out of the parking lot, he gave up and took the train. It wasn’t like he was on official police business. Not right now, anyway. Regardless, it was a short walk from bluebell train station to The local police station, conveniently run by Ellie’s uncle, Sheriff Huckleberry. And said Sheriff was the only one at the front desk when he walked in. Which was good. Derek still wasn’t happy about the time he broke the coffee machine. The Sheriff was leaning back in his seat reading the daily paper, which had a lovely image of a BBQ fire gone out of control on the front page. Cheerful stuff to start the morning with. Huckleberry looked up as Frank walked in. “Well, mornin’ Frank. What brings you out ‘round these parts? Make the chief mad again?” He asked in an accent that was quite similar to Ellie’s. “No. Er- Well, yes, but that’s not why I’m here.” Frank admitted. “I’m looking for something special to give Ellie for her birthday.” “Hm... Well, unless you’re going to pick her a bunch of wildflowers, there isn’t that much I can think of out here.” the Sheriff said, scratching his head. “What about Honey? I know she loves the stuff on her morning toast. Isn’t there some sort of rare kind of Honey that’s made out here?” Frank asked. The Sheriff thought for a moment. “You know, there just might be. I don’t know where it would be, but those old books over there might be able to tell you. Just don’t tip the whole bookshelf on your head when you start looking.” At that point, the phone rang. “Bluebell Police outpost, Huckleberry speaking.” The Sheriff said, picking up the phone. “Again, Hayes? Alright, I’m on my way down.” He said, ending the conversation quickly by hanging the phone back up. “That was Farmer Hayes. His pigs have escaped again. I keep telling him to put a stronger lock on that pen, but they still get out.” He sighed, hauling himself to his feet and grabbing his hat off of the hat rack. “I’m heading down to Fort Meadows to get it sorted out. Just leave any books on the desk when you’re done, and I’ll get them put back later.” “Thanks Sheriff Huckleberry!” Frank called after him as the door closed. The office empty, Frank walked over to the bookshelf and began to look over the titles. Most of them had to do with woodland management, mine management, or dam management (The local flavors of activity.) Finally, He found one titled 101 types of flora and fauna that looked like it would be relatively useful. He even got it out of the bookshelf without bringing five more down with it. He sat down at the desk and began to flip through it with interest. After a moment, though, he became aware of a low growl emanating from Sheriff Huckleberry’s desk. Derek the Squirrel glared over at him. Of All the animals Frank had met, this was the only one that outright hated him. While the feeling wasn’t mutual, Frank still avoided him as much as possible. The squirrel was addicted to coffee, and still held a grudge over the coffee machine Frank had broken on his last visit. “H-Hi, Derek...” Frank said with a nervous wave. The Squirrel only crouched lower over his coffee cup and growled a little louder. Frank gulped and turned back to the book. After a few moments, he came to the section on Bees. Having the last name of Honey, Frank knew a little more about bees than most people, if only for the random facts about them spouted at his face because of said last name. “There!” He said, pointing at a page. “Bluebell Wildflower Honey is said to be the sweetest product produced in Bluebell national park. Let’s see... Typically found in the springtime, the Bluebell Wildflower honey is made when Bees take the nectar from the Bluebell flowers back to their hive and make honey.” Frank looked at the index, then flipped over to the section on Bluebell flowers. “Bluebell Flowers grow in patches at the top of hills, especially in the Bluebell National Park. That’s perfect!” He said, standing up excitedly. “I’ll go find some Bluebell Flowers, follow the Bees back to their hive, and get the Honey! Ellie will love it!” Racing to the kitchenette, Frank found a empty jar with a lid to hold the honey in, and a spoon to get the honey out of the Hive. He no sooner turned around, however, when he found a large furry ball of anger jumping into his face. Derek apparently had decided that Frank had gotten a little too close to the coffee machine. The next few minutes were filled with yelling, pain, and crashing as Frank valiantly tried to pry the Squirrel off his face without breaking anything. Fortunately for Derek, the coffee machine remained unharmed. Unfortunately for Frank, he ended up under a large pile of books as the contents of the bookshelf landed on his head. He climbed out of the pile of books with the jar safely tucked against his jacket, albeit with a few more scratches and bruises than he’d had before. He hopped around a bit, torn between cleaning up his mess and going after the honey. One look from Derek made up his mind for him. “I’ll come back and clean it up later!” He promised as he rushed out the front door, the angry chitters of the Squirrel following his retreating back. *** Two hours later, Frank was wandering in the woods, completely lost. Armed only with the standard-issue grapple gun and an empty jar, Frank was helpless against the elements. Not that any of the elements would have bothered with him in the first place. The sun was high in the sky, and he started to worry. What if he didn’t find the honey in time for the Birthday party planned this afternoon? Frank sighed, a long sad sigh that proclaimed his hopeless case to the world. Then he noticed a flower. It was small, to be sure, but there were a lot of them, shaped like little blue bells.... “I found them!” he exclaimed, racing over to the flowers. He knelt down and peered intently at the little blue petals that flared out at the end, like little bells of celebration. He watched, he waited. And sure enough, a little bee crawled out of one of the bells. He watched as it flew from flower to flower, doing what bees have come to do naturally. Finally, covered in pollen, the be began its journey back to the hive. “Wait for me!” He cried, hurrying after the bee. After a moment of thought, he stopped and picked some of the flowers, so the bee wouldn’t have to fly all the way back for more. Then he continued following the bee on its looping and swooping path back to the hive. Frank raced around a tree, then raced back behind it at the sight of the hive. It was huge, having taken over an entire dead stump. Hundreds of bees swarmed around it, depositing their goods and making the sweet honey that he craved. Frank gulped. How on earth was he supposed to get honey from all those bees? He may have been a ditz, but he wasn’t stupid. That swarm would probably eat him alive. There was a bit of movement in the trees across the way. Frank spotted a huge brown bear, watching the hive with equal interest, but just as stuck was Frank was. Frank jumped a foot in the air as a loud motor revved from somewhere behind him. fumbling for his grapple gun, Frank dropped the jar and the flowers as he pulled himself up into the tree, out of sight. He watched as a large truck, unmistakably belonging to the Pappalardo’s Ice Cream business, pull up to the hive. Two goons jumped out, unmistakably goons by their rough voices and their manner of speech. Which was rather sloppy, to say the least. “There’s the hive, Jim.” One of them said, pointing to the mass of honeycomb in the old tree stump. “I can see it just fine, Larry.” Jims said, surveying the prize. “Now, why don’t youse get that little surprise of ours out and pout our little friends here to sleep?” “You gots it, boss.” Larry said, running to the back of the truck and pulling out a large length of hose. There was the sound of pumping from somewhere in the back of the truck. Frank watched with interest. So Pappalardo was after the honey too? Probably as a new flavor of some sort. “All ready!” Larry shouted. Jims grabbed the front of the hose and pointed it at the hive. “Start it up!” He shouted. There was a click and a whirr from the back of the truck, and smoke began to pour from the hose and towards the hive. Gradually, the buzz of the bees began to die down, lulled by the gradual smoke until they were nothing more than a light buzz at the edge of your hearing. “Now theys out, let’s grab the hive and go!” Larry shouted from the back of the truck. The ice cream cone on top pulled back to reveal a large crane, which began to reach toward the hive. Frank gasped. Taking a little honey was one thing, but the whole hive! That was stealing! That was against the law! He was so caught up in this thought that he didn’t realize he was slipping from the branch until he was already halfway down to the ground. He landed with a rather inelegant THUD, shaking the tree and alerting the two goons to his presence. “Um...Hi?” Frank asked nervously as the two goons glared at him. “I just came out here looking for a little honey... See?” He said, quickly scooping the little glass jar off of the ground. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll just get a little scoop and be on my way...” The two goons looked at him, then at each other, then at him again. “He’s a cop, Jims.” Larry said with a mean growl. “We can’t have them knowing we was out here. Not yet.” “No, we can’t.” Jims agreed, looking at Frank with what was a very predatory grin. “Guess we better take cares of this one, then...” Frank gulped as the two goons closed in on him. This wasn’t how he was planning on having the morning go. And no one knew he was out here-they wouldn’t come looking for him for a full day, probably. He scooted around the tree, absentmindedly picking up the flowers as he went. As soon as he was on the other side, He ran, racing around the clearing in an attempt to lose the goons without losing the honey. Unfortunately, he was outnumbered. Soon the goons were closing in from both sides, pushing him back against the hive. Two steps, one step... Frank backed up into something hairy. He looked behind him in surprise. The bear, which had gone completely unnoticed by the goons, had taken advantage of the sleeping bees to grab some honey of its own. And it was rather displeased at being interrupted. Due to its big bulk, it saw the two goons before it saw Frank. Which was probably Frank’s luckiest streak all day. The bear roared and took off after the goons, chasing them into the trees and out of sight. Frank sighed and held the jar to his chest in relief. “They’re gone...” He panted. Then he looked down at the jar. “Oh, right!” It didn’t take him long to fill up the little jar with honey-there was plenty of it to go around. He had screwed the lid on and was starting to walk away with his prize when he heard an angry buzzing behind him. He looked and realized the smoke the goons had used on the bees was wearing off. Rather quickly, in fact. “Oh no...” Frank sighed. Then he started running. *** The briefing room at the police station, it was agreed among the officers, was the best place to hold a party. It was spacious, easy to decorate, and came with its own popcorn machine. Ellie’s birthday party was in full swing, since most of the day’s work was over. Tables full of food (and doughnuts) lined the walls, and someone had set up a small DJ stand next to the podium, which Officer Miles was manning to great effect. Pretty much everyone who worked for LCPD (and a lot of people who didn’t) had shown up to celebrate their favorite communications girl’s special day. Well, almost everyone.... “Has anyone seen Frank?” Ellie asked halfway though the party. The ginger-haired klutz had yet to appear. Which was surprising, considering his crush on Ellie. Chase looked out the window at the parking lot. “His car’s still there.” He noted. “Bah! Who cares where Honey is?” Dunby asked, eating another doughnut. “He never showed up at the Pound to take care of the mess he made like he was supposed to. No clue where the idiot is...” At that moment, the elevator dinged and a rather ragged young man stepped out. Frank, to put it frankly, was a mess. His hair was filled with twigs and leaves, his coat was torn in several places, and there was dried mud all over his pants and shoes. His face has hard to read-it was covered in scratches and bee stings. But there was a definite smile on his face as he slowly made his way across the room to Ellie, holding his hard-earned gift: A little jar of Honey, wrapped with a red ribbon and a bunch of Bluebell flowers stuck in the bow. “Happy Birthday, Ellie.” Frank said happily as Ellie took the jar of honey from him. He then promptly collapsed on the floor and passed out. After making sure that Frank wasn’t dead (He wasn’t) Chase got Officer Spencer to take him to the hospital for treatment for his various injuries. He then turned to Ellie, who had opened the jar of honey and was delicately tasting it. “What is it?” He asked. Ellie smiled. “Bluebell Wildflower Honey.” She said, delighted. “...Can’t you buy that at any supermarket?” Chase asked, confused. “Oh, of course.” Ellie said. “But this little jar, freshly found by a close friend-well, it’s just that little bit sweeter.” She said as she ate another finger full. "You know, you could look all over the world, but I can tell you now you won't find anything as sweet as Honey." *** Author's notes: Hey folks! So I've been meaning to get back into writing for a while, and after playing faaaaaaar too much Lego City Undercover, I decided to continue the adventures of Chase McCain and crew. (Hey, general Lego stories are allowed here, if I'm reading the rules right. If not, feel free to boot it to its proper place.) These are mostly going to be associated one-shots revolving around the LEGO City PD and their various escapades. The main characters of the game aren't always going to be the main characters of these stories, but they'll show up every now and again. Who knows? Maybe I'll get back into writing standard BIONICLE stories too...
