a goose Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 (edited) Okay, here's the review topic for my epic Dark Mirror: Part I, which is the sequel to my other epic, Shadows. The topic itself is found here.Credit to Shattered Mask Productions for the banner.Comments and constructive criticism are very welcome.- Paradoxophobia Edited April 2, 2012 by Paradoxophobia Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 So. Newest epic. Incommodo's in a facility for the insane? I see. Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 18, 2012 Author Share Posted March 18, 2012 So. Newest epic.Incommodo's in a facility for the insane? I see.Well, let's face it, he's Incommodo, and he came back from a parallel universe with a story about how he saved all of time.Where else would he be? XD Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 I don't know, walking the streets, homeless and ill-treated? Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 18, 2012 Author Share Posted March 18, 2012 *Shrugs*I dunno. I always pictured him locked up somewhere. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 So, new character, I suppose Pirok will return at some point, and that Reichenbach will have some rudimentary common sense? So far this seems to be better than Shadows, so don't disappoint me! http://www.bzpower.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/mad.gifOn an off-topic note, why not check out my shamelessly-advertised prologue of my epic? Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 18, 2012 Author Share Posted March 18, 2012 Actually, Les appeared in the first chapter of Shadows, Reichenbach has some common sense, and this will be better than Shadows. You won't be disappointed.I've already checked it, looks good, I'll be posting my opinion in your review topic ASAP. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Ah, forgot about him then.Ahem, yes, ASAP. Very soon. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 18, 2012 Author Share Posted March 18, 2012 Yep. Reread C1 of Shadows, he's there. The murderer with the ring'll be showing up too.Indeed. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 19, 2012 Share Posted March 19, 2012 So Arkrak will be appearing as well? What is his job exactly, other than random amateur musician (BZPRPG version), sculptor (Most versions) or guy who possesses a Frostelus as a lawyer (Techna version)? Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 19, 2012 Author Share Posted March 19, 2012 No spoilers, Hubert. XP Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 19, 2012 Share Posted March 19, 2012 Looks like Reichnebach has a more original plot this time. Interesting.And Pirok has gone back to avoiding Incy, which is a nice touch. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 19, 2012 Author Share Posted March 19, 2012 Looks like Reichnebach has a more original plot this time. Interesting.And Pirok has gone back to avoiding Incy, which is a nice touch.Yes, his plot is reasonably original.Thankyou. Yeah, Pirok probably won't be showing up in Part I.BTW, did no-one get the Rache reference? Come on, I thought the ring in the first chapter of Shadows was enough, but no. You all need more before you get ANY references. *Sighs* Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 19, 2012 Share Posted March 19, 2012 What's it even referencing? Some guy with a ring called Rache, doesn't ring a bell. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 19, 2012 Author Share Posted March 19, 2012 It's a joke. The first SH story, A Study in Scarlet. There are plot details of the novel below, so they're in spoiler tags.The murderer drove his victims to the scene in a taxi, took out a ring, killed them. One of the victims managed to write 'Rache' into the wall (it's German for revenge).The murderer then tried to return when he realised he'd left the ring behind. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 19, 2012 Share Posted March 19, 2012 I haven't read it, or seen any adaptions. I knew Incommodo wasn't really that clever. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 19, 2012 Author Share Posted March 19, 2012 Well, he was clever enough to figure out it was Rache, although only from the fact his name was inscribed on the ring. XD(BTW, if you are interested in reading A Study in Scarlet it's available [quite legally] here) Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Well, longer chapters, good, little reference or two, good, original story, good. Shaping up pretty well here. I guess Incy is kind of the protagonist of these epics then, or is Pirok or Les going to take a starring role in the third? Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 22, 2012 Author Share Posted March 22, 2012 Yep.I like references.Yes, it's an original story.Inc plays a big role in Dark Mirror, but Pirok (and Proditor) will be pretty big in The Eleventh Hour. Les is just playing a big role ATM. (BTW, his name is a reference to Detective Lestrade, from the SH stories) Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Protodite Karzahni Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Ah, missed the Holmes reference there. I feel I should be a little ashamed of that. I'm gonna take the most obvious path and theorise Reichenbach killed the Toa. Y'know, given he's already been busy. Quote I wrote stories once. They were okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 23, 2012 Author Share Posted March 23, 2012 It's okay, there'll be a good few more to catch.Reichenbach may have been busy, but he's not stupid. He only gets involved when it's necessary. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Wait, you now have a Lestrade expy?So does this mean Inc is Sherlock Holmes or something? Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 23, 2012 Author Share Posted March 23, 2012 Well, Reich's partially based off Moriarty, and Les's been there a while.It's a joke. Inc obviously isn't Sherlock. He's a detective, who is quite good at his job, but he's too idiotic and... well... funny, really, to be Holmes. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 24, 2012 Share Posted March 24, 2012 I like the relationship between Inc and Frustro, but it seems... Familiar. Some how ;)I wonder what these anonymous strangers have in common... Oh wait, there was no info, apart from they died :PI forgot to mention this earlier, but I like the reference to me in chapter 1 Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 24, 2012 Author Share Posted March 24, 2012 I like the relationship between Inc and Frustro, but it seems... Familiar. Some how ;)I wonder what these anonymous strangers have in common... Oh wait, there was no info, apart from they died :PI forgot to mention this earlier, but I like the reference to me in chapter 1 The relationship between Inc and Frustro is very much different, don't worry.Wait and see, you'll learn soon enough. Besides, there was some info...Thankyou. I was referring to both you and to Fishers there. XD Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 25, 2012 Share Posted March 25, 2012 Ooh, he's playing with his mind... Mind games...Looks like some psychological warfare going on here. I like it. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 25, 2012 Author Share Posted March 25, 2012 Ooh, he's playing with his mind... Mind games...Looks like some psychological warfare going on here. I like it.Told you the relationship with Frustro was different. XP Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 26, 2012 Share Posted March 26, 2012 ...Frustro will obviously become an antagonist.Anyway, I gladly await the appearance of Somewhat Competent and Responsible Toa of Sonics. Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 26, 2012 Author Share Posted March 26, 2012 True dat, bro. XDHe should be coming in this chapter. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 26, 2012 Share Posted March 26, 2012 So, what exactly is his job? Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 26, 2012 Author Share Posted March 26, 2012 Unemployed/Musician.Not that many people like him, though. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 26, 2012 Share Posted March 26, 2012 Ah, I see. So Amateur Musician. With a viola. Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 26, 2012 Author Share Posted March 26, 2012 Yeah, pretty much. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 (edited) Arkrak's funny, explosions are big, and Reichenbach is kewl. Edited March 28, 2012 by Wotsiznaim Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 28, 2012 Author Share Posted March 28, 2012 Arkrak's funny, explosions are big, and Reichenbach is kewl.Yep.Indeed they are.What justification do you have for this? Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 He's more psychotic and less annoying than in the RPG. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 28, 2012 Author Share Posted March 28, 2012 He's only as annoying as you think of him as being.He's just a bit more murderous in general this time around. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wotz Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Ooh, a prophecy! This is better than Shadows. And Vakama died! Dun dun duuunnn!! And Frustro's a bad guy! Dun dun duunn!! And Reichenbach has a pattern! Dun dun- Okay, I'll stop now. But this chapter is where it actually started getting interesting. I especially liked the bit with Reich's split personality. Quote D U N E W O L F Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a goose Posted March 29, 2012 Author Share Posted March 29, 2012 Ooh, a prophecy! This is better than Shadows. And Vakama died! Dun dun duuunnn!! And Frustro's a bad guy! Dun dun duunn!! And Reichenbach has a pattern! Dun dun-Okay, I'll stop now. But this chapter is where it actually started getting interesting. I especially liked the bit with Reich's split personality.Indeed it is a prophecy, and indeed it is better than Shadows.Yep, Vakama's dead.Perhaps...Are you sure? Wait and see the revelation coming up an hour from now... :evilgrin:Thankyou.Oh, you liked that, then? The split personality showed up in the RPG, too. Quote [BZPRPG PROFILES] Nikarra - Kaelynn - Ronan - Muir - Donal - Aerus - Montague - Kira - Koura - Learu - Alteora - Fuacht - Caana - Nessen - Merrill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
25K Now! Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Arkrak - He Who Breaks The Fourth Wall And Acts As The Only Sane Guy In The Entire Epic.His actions are also amusing. I also spotted an attempt at using him as a sonic screwdriver. Quote http://vimeo.com/198967785 BZPRPG Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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