Jump to content

Janus

Premier Retired Staff
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    1,016

  • Joined

  • Last visited

 Content Type 

Posts posted by Janus

    UM EXCUSE YOU

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    JEN.

    I HACKED THE BZPOWERS TO GET MY PASSWORD BACK SO I CAN POST AND SAY HOW COOL YOU ARE.

    YOU ARE VERY COOL AND NICE.

     

    also the entire post is not caps you can see I am within the legal laws of the bzpower websites.

     

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU ROCK A WHOLE TON.

     

    00001659.jpg

    • Upvote 3

    ~♥~ Kokoro no Ice ~♥~

    in Comedies

    Posted

    nate

     

    this was literally painful to read.  I felt physical discomfort while reading this.

     

    that you put yourself through what I can only imagine was some form of trauma, to try and traumatize me on my birthday....

     

    well it's the sweetest thing ever.  Love U <3

    • Upvote 10

    Transformations

    in Short Stories

    Posted

    I hate this story and everything about it.

     

     

     

     

    That's a lie you're a beautiful human being and this is a beautiful story, I cannot give a more in depth review than I already have throughout the three drafts that I've read. This is a good thing yes.

    • Upvote 2

    Staff Survivor II Game Topic

    in General Discussion

    Posted · Edited by Hahli Husky

     

    makaruba_zps6614d202.png

    Team Makaruba was not going to waste this sudden, unexplained fit of kindness from Tufi. I took a few hours to scope out the terrain, jot down some coordinates and come up with some semblance of a plan. Once I had all the details, I spent valuable minutes putting every careful detail into place. Not one circumstance was left to chance.

    Much later, after getting back to Club Teetotaler, I found Mycaruba punching a tree or whatever he was doing to get this terrible party started.

    "Here's how we're going to do it....." I started.

     

     

     

    survivorjanus.png

    SO it seemed like it was time to do a thing. A thing involving volcanoes, secrets, likely danger, highly likely murder--and knowing this group at least one person stumbling around drunkenly (my money was on the ape. Someone needs to cut that thing off)

    But anyhow I guess it was time to start planning. I wasn't sure if I could trust any of my respective 'team' least of all my beautiful and evil wife, but hey--when life gives you lemons you start acting like a paranoid fugitive desperately trying to save his life. Also you probably throw lemons at people--unfortunately there were no lemons here.

    We walked back to the campsite in mostly silence, only the vague menacing threats of Hahli Husky and (somewhat shockingly) some paranoid rambling by Emzee (someone understands me!)

    Once there everyone promptly abandoned each other. Makaru joined Mycaruba, Emzee backed into a corner and his Nektann followed him like lost children (or puppies) and Hahli Husky began stalking me.

    At least we had a solid navigator.

     

     

     

    makaruba_zps6614d202.png

    I made sure none of the others were eavesdropping before I relayed the plan to my friend.

    "First, we need to make our way south, to The Cavern of Historical Records, where we will find three skeletons, each holding a golden book. We will need to pull the correct golden book to open a secret door to the Pit of the Pendulum. We will swing across the moat, using your superior strength to crash through to the other side into Axonn's Storeroom. Inside will be three pots. We smash the pots to find the keys, and place them in the correct pedestals, and find the passage to the Chamber of the Sacred Markers. We will have to arrange the symbols on the left of the room to match the symbols on the right and gain access to The Room of the Ancient Toa. You need to get into the correct set of armor and pull the matching levers whereupon we will unlock The Shrine of the Silver Brakas. In here, there will be a statue that will need to be correctly assembled to gain access to The Room of the Secret Password. I wager we will have to shout aloud from the right tome. We will then use Brutaka's Secret Passage to escape the Quicksand Bogand enter the Dark Forest. Here, we shall find ourselves entering the fabled Vezon's Court. Apparently, we have to "mimic Vezon" and pull the secret lever, and that will grant us access to The Lava Gateway, traversing obstacles and dangers. And then we shall seek Tufi's Prize.

    Any questions?"

    Mycaruba looked over the map I had drawn carefully in the dirt. There was a long silence. I feared it was too much for his primitive mind to capture.

    Then, when I begun to lose hope, he looked at me and whispered.

    Mycaruba

    We would leave at nightfall to avoid being followed.

     

     

     

    survivorhusky_zps8c940ce0.png

    Janus stiffened a little as I hugged his arm. I was excited about us actually getting to work together for some end. His face was somewhat pale as he looked down at me.

    I pursed my lips. "Are you okay."

    He blinked. "Uh. Yes! Yes, fantastic." Color had returned to his cheeks and he smiled, but his eyes still held that crazed look that I often associated with anytime the property taxes were due, or when we were out of eggs. As a vegetarian, what had he been eating on the island, anyway? Just fruit this whole time? But he went on, regardless. "So on the basis of practically nothing, let's make a plan."

    As he speculated what we could likely expect, I found that, as usual, my ears were tuning out the nearby sounds and honing in on the sounds coming from further away. Makaru sat on the far side of the campground, but his voice was clear to me. I listened as he explained, in detail, about the ritual sacrifice of children his plan. I heard him scratching in the dirt, and then he and Mycaruba moved back to the middle of the camp.

    "What do you think? Any ideas?" Janus inquired, patting my arm to bring me back.

    I stood up theatrically. "Yes. I know exactly what we're going to do."

    He sighed in what seemed to be relief. "You're amazing, baby. So what do we do?"

    "We're going -" I pointed dramatically into the distance and did my very best Captain Morgan pose, "to copy Makaru's homework."

     

     

     

    survivoremzee_zps4a6a3416.png

    That would be quite the achievement for someone to access a chamber inside a volcano. I didn't realize we had the power to swim in lava.

    Unless we did have that power. I stored that thought in my mind for later. I never saw anyone or anything fall into the lava, and while the area around the volcano did feel hot... technically we should have all burst into flames or melted whenever we went up to that volcano for our competitions.

    Anyway, back to the plan. There was no way to know what exactly Tufi's world had in store for us, and this volcano was no exception. I knew I'd have to plan for pretty much everything, and I also knew that I'd fail at that. I could at least try though.

    I would find the entrance to the 777 steps in the Green Belt. Use two other tribesmates to search for it -- the Green Belt wasn't that expansive.

    Once we're actually at the entrance to the chamber, things get a little bit more questionable. What's down there? Will Umbra, the Chamber of Death and the Zone of Nightmares be down there? Will anything canon be down there?

    If yes, then do the following

    1) Don't be a wuss in the Zone of Nightmares (Keeping It Real will probably work in this scenario)

    2) Kill one of the other two survivors in the Chamber of Death (and be quick about it since they'll totally plan on doing the same to me)

    3) Cross the lava gate, destroy the bridge, and hope that your rivals have prepared to meet Kali…

    4) Criticize the Umbra set so harshly that the poor guy just breaks down

    5) Walk into the chamber, take the prize, Bob's your uncle.

    I looked down at the crude map I had drawn in the sand with satisfaction. It would not be too difficult to program these steps into one of the nektann. Noting the time, I erased the map from the sand, left the camp, and stopped at a remote area to quickly shut down the scout nektann and begin coding my plan into it. This companion would make a great guide.

    Once that was finished, night had fallen. I set out towards the green belt, knowing that victory depended on getting a head start while not being followed.

     

     

     

    makaruba_zps6614d202.png

    Mycaruba shattered the barricaded door to the Cavern of Historical Records with ease. I eyed each golden book carefully, and pulled what I believed to be the correct book. Was I correct? I have no idea, because Mycaruba ripped the other two books from their skeletons at the same time. The door shook, then opened.

    Amazing how ancient contraptions always seem to be dusty and still also work. Astounding!

    Mycaruba continued to heft his superior weight to our advantage. He took to the vines and swung, knocking the pillar over with ease. The pillar fell, shattered a support collumn, and half of the upper floor caved in, coincidentally bridging the gap between my friend and I.

    Once we hit Axonn's storeroom, though, we found ourselves scratching our heads. The keys were easy enough to scavenge, but it was impossible to decipher how to get them into the right pedestals. We took our best guess. I put the last key in and turned the latch. There was a resounding click. Success! The door flew open.

    So did the floor.

    Team Makaruba had been swept away. The keys were not in the correct placement. We had failed, and I presume we also forfeited our Pendants of life.

     

     

     

    [Empress Jen]

     

    Just to be safe, even more canisters fell in various spots all over Voya Nui. It was like somebody somewhere had discovered the joys of a souped-up t-shirt cannon. Most of the canisters contained a new message:

     

    "As far as escaping the next week alive goes, Emzee's on the best track. You'll be down to three people before you know it.

     

    Also, pick a voted-off Survivor to take with you as backup for an expedition into the volcano. Next week's going to be a doozy."

     

    The other canisters contained meaningless trinkets.

     

     

     

    [Empress Jen]

     

    Sitting out in the middle of camp like that? Ophelia was disappointed in how easy it would be to take Janus away. She'd even brought fellow Vahki Beatrice along for company. They looked at each other, shrugged, and had this week's loser by the arms within seconds.

     

    Beatrice almost asked why HH wasn't more upset about the loss of her husband, but a quick look from Ophelia told her everything she needed to know.

     

     

     

    survivoremzee_zps4a6a3416.png

    I continued my trek into the Green Belt, my three nektann following closely like honorable soldiers. As much as I hated the thought, we were getting just that much closer to the cold, fearsome realization that this was war.

    I hoped for the best, but I prepared for the wors-*THUMP*

    A color blacker than the night filled my vision. I was out cold.

    ----------

    "Ugghghhhghgh", I moaned as I vision returned to me. After a brief moment of dizziness, I quickly gathered my senses and sat upright. I looked around for my robotic companions was breathed a sigh of relief when I spotted all three, waiting patiently for me to awaken.

    Had I been attacked in the night? Did Team Makaruba or Janus and HH find me?

    Nah, HH would have killed me, as would Makaru, with that Gafnaxe.

    My peripheral vision spotted something to my far left -- it was a canister! And it landed right on my head. I eagerly grabbed the canister and opened it.

    Quote

    "As far as escaping the next week alive goes, Emzee's on the best track. You'll be down to three people before you know it.

     

    Also, pick a voted-off Survivor to take with you as backup for an expedition into the volcano. Next week's going to be a doozy."

     

    That's what's up! Wait, that was an immunity challenge?

    I mind quickly changed gears to the second line in that message.

    Quote

     

     

    pick a voted-off Survivor

    Who would I choose? Well that was obvious.

    "DeeVee," I said to seemingly no one in particular. "Our brewery needs its brewmaster back! Plus it is scientifically proven that the two of us working together are unbeatable-"*THUMP*

    Before I could reminiscence about that time we started a fire simply by being us, a color blacker than the night filled my vision again. I was out cold.

    Again.

     

     

     

    survivordeev.png

     

    I woke up on a beach. Last I remembered I had been in a dark room, maybe floating? Was I underwater? Had there been others floating in the room too? It was hazy.

     

    And now I was on a beach.

     

    No. Not again. I sighed. Was this better than whatever nefarious purpose we were being used for in captivity?

     

    And why was I back?

     

     

     

    survivorhusky_zps8c940ce0.png

    The preparations were complete. I had traced an intricate circle of runes into the wet sand, sprinkled them with dew water and my own spit, and paced around the circle 3 times clockwise and once counter-clockwise. I clapped my hands and chanted the magic words.

    "Kittens, Feminism, GIFs, Ducks. Disney, Sailor Moon, Eplilepsy Warning. Homestuck. Bless This Post."

    The ground shook violently as the runes began to glow. A mighty wave rose up from the ocean, crashing on to the shore not far from where I stood. When the wave fell back, Kakaru was laying on the shore, covered in seaweed and angry flopping fish. I picked up the sandwich from the center of the rune circle and took a bite, regarding my son with a little surprise.

    "Oh, hey!" I covered my mouth while I chewed. "If I had known you were coming, I would've ordered another sandwich."

     

     

     

    survivorkakaruunaf_zpsd836d53a.png

     

    I woke up on the beach as disgruntled as I was the day Tufi threw us all into this mess three months ago. I hauled myself to my feet once more, picked the seaweed out of my hair, and gazed unhappily at the sandwich my mom was eating. Only moments before, I was sitting on their couch marathoning the first season of Macgyver on Netflix and eating that exact sandwich. You know the feeling.

     

    I cracked my knuckles, stumbled over to the pub, and took a long swig of the nearest bottle. It was water but I liked to pretend.

     

    "What's the plan?" I slurred. "I don't know about you guys, but I aim to misbehave."

     

    HH gave me a look. "Don't murder anyone this time. I don't want to ban you again."

     

    "Yes mom." I sidled up to Makaru quietly and winked. He winked back.

     

    tumblr_marj8h7zv01r4e0kjo1_500_zpsba5ca5

     

     

     

    Staff Survivor II Game Topic

    in General Discussion

    Posted · Edited by Hahli Husky

     

    makvivor_zpsb905644c.png

    And with that, Kakaru was gone. I could not help but feel somewhat responsible, and I was now nervous. If someone as amazing as Kakaru were to be booted, then what hope did I have?

    I made my way back to the camp. Being tall and going downhill, I managed to beat all of my compatriots by a whopping seven seconds. Shout-out to power walking.

    I made my way to the bar to fix myself a little something to ease the shock over the last vote.

    But aghast!

    15214389_3h3rw_zpsb26564d6.jpeg

    The bar was empty! I was left mildly concerned!

     

     

     

    neathumanbanner_zps79e20292.png

     

    "LUDO MEAN DRUNK," Ludo said. "LUDO SMASH PUNY HUMANS."

     

     

     

    survivoremzee_zps4a6a3416.png

    After I watched Kakaru be hauled away. I calmly strolled away into the jungle, away from the other survivors. Things were becoming more dire, and I wondered who from our Neat tribe would be sacrificed next. Indeed, the time would come for all of us -- whether we would remain alive to see it or not. This game would not last forever, and before it ended, I would have to make my mark.

    The time had come to play my hand. I just had to find it first.

    I knew where this surprise would be if it truly existed in this world, and I immediately began my search.

    ----------------------

    Leaves and twigs crunched under my feet as I ventured through the jungle once more. This time, however, I was staying the course towards the center of the island, where Mt. Valmai rested. There was really no basis for my wishful assumption, but I felt that there could hardly be any harm in at least looking. After all, if Antidermis exists here, who is to assume that we won't find something even cooler than a laundry list of powers?

    Like a Fenrakk... or a certain dragon.

    After a several minutes of venturing through the jungle, I abruptly stopped at the sound of some rustling. With no weapon to wield, I balled my fists. I was still the Texas Ranger after all.

    To my relief, no Rahi revealed itself. Just a pack of Nektann. But were these particular machines reprogrammed, or were they yet undomesticated?

    I suppose there was one way to find out. I walked towards the Nektann three.

     

     

     

    neathumanbanner_zps79e20292.png

     

    "LUDO NOT SMASH!" you said frantically. In retrospect, leaving the bar's contents out in the open had probably not been the best idea. "LUDO TAKE PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY AND NOT ALLOW LABELS TO DICTATE ACTIONS!"

     

    "LUDO NOT GET BIG WORDS," Ludo said. "LUDO ANGRY!"

     

    "OKAY," you said. "CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS? WHAT MAKES YOU ANGRY?"

     

    "FRIENDS ALWAYS LEAVING FOR BEACH OR VOLCANO. LUDO WONDER IF REALLY FRIENDS."

     

    "SURE WE ARE," you said, although he probably had a point. You were being nibbled at by vague feelings of guilt over using friendship as a card to get him to guard your old fort and scare off Settlers. It was like he wasn't even a person, just some NPC placed on that island for your amusement. Still, you didn't think his current state was the best to be broaching the topic of friendship versus exploitation.

     

    "We're all friends, right everybody? Right?" You looked back to see everybody blatantly undermining your words. Faced with the prospect of a drunken Blocking Lava Ape, they were edging away or already gone--if they had even been there in the first place. What was that about fools rushing and angels treading? Oh well, that would have required your teammates to be angels or fools or both, which they weren't. You turned tail, despite your lack of one, and ran, like you hadn't already done enough running on this island. You were just lucky your boots were so durable.

     

    tumblr_inline_mt1ozhqSOV1qz4rgp_zps75fda

     

     

     

    survivorhusky_zps8c940ce0.png

    I'd mourned for the loss of Kakaru for a while, but being temporarily handicapped by Tufi had given me time to realize that the little pus was probably going to just mess up the Netflix recommendations and clear out the refrigerator once he got home. Provided there was even anything edible left at this point. It's not like I had decided to toss everything in the freezer before a seemingly innocent night on the town with friends.

    But yeah as soon as it was apparent there was a drunk wild animal in the equation, I had booked it along with an assortment of frenzied others.

    tumblr_mqssp9Tzhi1r8m2o5o1_500_zps565f1c

    (I have been waiting to use this gif since the teams were merged)

     

     

     

    survivoremzee_zps4a6a3416.png

    While my friends were evading the wrath of a drunken angry Lava Ape, my confrontation with the three Nektann remained slow but very tense. If my knowledge was correct, before me was a scout Nektann, a combat Nektann, and a debuff Nektann. The latter one was definitely a threat, and I wiped beads of sweat off my forehead that rested behind my blue Huna. The scout and combat Nektann could maybe be managed, but if I let them take too much of my attention, the debuff Nektann could literally starve me to death.

    Just then, the combat Nektann squatted and then lunged towards me. Expecting the combat Nektann to be... well... combative, I was all too prepared and I deftly high-jumped over the charging machine, sending it tumbling into the foliage behind me, and also jerking my body to the side, dodging the debuff beam that I noticed the other Nektann preparing. Once I landed on the ground, I wasted no time reaching behind me and grabbing one of the combat Nektann's legs. After turning it upside down, a forceful stop on it's underside was enough to shut it down temporarily.

    I was in my comfort zone now. Taking on adversaries and showing them who's boss. I could get used to this, but I knew that this calming activity would have to be fleeting. Audiences want hijinks that I sometimes don't get because they're references to far off things -- not wish fulfillment.

    I suppose I could fight these Nektann with no pants. That'd take me out of my comfort zone.

     

     

     

    survivordeev.png

     

    I watched from a distance as Arpy dealt with the lava ape. It was kind of humorous. I drank from the secret Brewmaster's collection I kept hidden. It was a good thing Ludo hadn't gotten to this!

     

     

     

    [Empress Jen]

     

    Attention Survivors:

     

    Prepare yourselves for a very big day tomorrow!

     

    That is all.

     

     

     

    neathumanbanner_zps79e20292.png

     

    As you made a hard right to dive behind a log, you were grateful that Ludo and straight lines were not on the best of terms at the moment. He crashed off into the undergrowth as Tufi's call boomed over the island.

     

    You chose to prepare yourself by finding solitude, whipping up a simple phonograph with some leaves, some twigs, and a pants zipper, and listening to the pristine copy of the White Album that you'd found on the volcano slopes. If you were going to go out, you were going to do it with a harmless musical deus ex machina bonhomie thing. Not necessarily with style.

     

     

     

    survivoremzee_zps4a6a3416.png

    Ha ha! Looks like I was already ahead of the game. What better way to prepare for a big day than through gratuitous violence?

    *TWACK*

    I felt myself reeling backwards as a consequence of my mental aside. The right side of my face burned and it looked up at the offending scout Nektann with contempt. I had apparently been smacked clear across the face. My glance then quickly shifted to the ever-dangerous Debuff Nektann. I knew that I couldn't keep engaging these mechanical adversaries forever, and I found myself moving further towards Mount Valmai.

    Perhaps I could actually tempt fate... into working in my favor?

    Pweeeeease?

     

     

     

    [Empress Jen]

     

     

    "Attention," boomed the voice, guaranteeing everybody was paying attention now, "It's time for the very big announcement!"

     

    "This week we'll have double voting, meaning two of you will leave the game! Also, there's no immunity either, so have fun!"

     

    The countdown for when DeeVee would notice the immunity necklace was gone began.

     

     

     

    survivorhusky_zps8c940ce0.png

    The Final Four.

    I was already crafting more reliable weapons for myself and waiting for the results.

    Things were going to get intense near the end.

    I mean that's only normal.

    Also I didn't really want to force Tufi to double-post again.

     

    Staff Survivor II Game Topic

    in General Discussion

    Posted · Edited by Hahli Husky

     

    neathumanbanner_zps79e20292.png

     

    tumblr_msozdnuQ7T1rf11n3o1_250_zpsf2a1bf

     

    Sobering up you had no problem with. Drinking on the job was bad form, and besides, it wasn't like the cider had had time to ferment significantly. You hoped your sobriety would give you an edge. To be precise, the edge of the volcano. As in, not falling into it. Because you were on the edge. Yes.

     

    Getting back to the volcano wasn't as fun as it had been the first time, though. It was hard to tear yourself away from the atmosphere of relaxed hedonism that permeated the camp. You'd already done dancing, stabbing, drinking...what more was there in life? Besides crushing your enemies, seeing them driven before you, and hearing the lamentation of their women, of course. Maybe that was what this challenge was about.

     

     

     

    [Fyi this is my favourite RP post so far]

     

    makvivor_zpsb905644c.png

    I made my way to the volcano.

    Haha. "Sober up", the empress says. I know for a fact she wasn't talking to me. You see, we have inversely proportional FERMENTATION COEFFICIENTS. I can drink an entire barrel of the worst Schizo Ale and be none the worse.

    I've only ever seen her drink once. Had a shot, she did.

    Wound up leveling half of BZ-Koro. Said the statue of Hapori Tohu "looked at her funny"

    Caused 1,250,000 widgets in damages. 15 people hospitalized and three entire Vahki squads completely written off. Punched Black Six square in his metallic jaw.

    Hah. Good times. I'll have to buy her a round once this is all over.

     

     

     

    survivoremzee.png

     

    "Oh right, challenges", I said softly to myself as I heard Tufi's call and the sounds of shuffling feet. My search would have to continue later.

     

    I carefully made my way back down the volcano, avoiding the rest of the survivors to prevent any chance of backstabbing.

     

     

     

    survivordeev.png

    On our way to the volcano, HH and I agreed we should set our plan into motion. As we started to leave camp, with Kakaru and Janus in tow, we took a detour to the cliff Kakaru had so kindly pointed out before. Standing behind them, we motioned for them to look over and tell us what they saw.

     

    "Looks like antidermis still, I already pointed this out, why am I looking again?" Kakaru pondered.

    HH and I looked at each other, and then proceeded to push both Janus and Kakaru in, before jumping in ourselves.

    The experience was... odd, to say the least. Unbeknownst to all out fellow survivors, the alehouse's secondary function was to allow us just enough lack of sobriety to feel the painful experience a little less strongly.

     

    When we escaped from the pool, the antidermis no longer glowed. Clearly we had together soaked up the entirety of this magical essence. We looked at each other, and though we had not turned to gas, the enlarged and toned muscles clearly proved a point. The powers rushing through our bodies also helped. We had escaped the Maktua groupmind through alcohol, and had instead absorbed only the powers, and not the species' group conscious like Brutaka had. This was good.

    HH and I high-fived, it was a little strong as we didn't know our own strengths (and I think she used some gravity powers too).

    Janus and Kakaru looked shocked but pleased as well.

     

    "Welcome to The Plan".

    We went to the volcano. Whatever happened next, whatever challenges happened, we were forever powerful Makuta.

     

     

     

    survivorhusky_zps8c940ce0.png

     

    Being a Makuta felt super weird. I'd somehow imagined we'd end up turning into these plastic mutants, and was relieved that my fears were debunked. It sure would suck to be made entirely of plastic. Having really defined muscles was weird, too. Janus was always such a cute little reed, and now I wasn't sure how to feel about him looking like he ate well. I mean, he usually ate enough for the both of us, but still.

    We were almost at the meeting spot when we stepped right into Makaru's path.

    Nobody bothered to make a poker face. Especially not Makaru.

     

    what_zps94375b4b.gif?t=1388705507

     

     

     

    [Empress Jen]

     

    Tufi watched the transformations with some concern. That the players were resorting to drinking questionable fluids was bad enough, but mutating themselves? There was no way that could end well. It was time to save these people from themselves.

     

    She sighed and got to work. Claiming Voya Nui as part of BZP was a great move; it made using all the important abilities that much easier. Each staff (and no-longer-staff) member had been given powers that were appropriate to that individual. The Makuta set was never up for consideration. Legend and lore was one thing. A lengthy list of powers that were definitely real was just so... fanficcy.

     

    There. Everything back to the way it should be. Maybe Tufi had sapped just a little more power than was strictly necessary, but it wasn't a big deal. She'd put it back later. If she remembered.

     

    "Survivors! Hurry up, already!" Tufi shouted. The Neat Humans got to the game area, some more shocked than others. No big deal. Tufi took the immunity necklace back from Kakaru, who looked like he had too much to process in far too little time.

     

    "This week, we're going for some direct competition. You've each got three clay discs to your name. One at a time, you're going to break somebody's disc. If you lose your discs, you're out of the game. The last person still in the game wins immunity for the week.

     

    "You can go in any order you wish. However, at least half of the remaining players must play or one hour and one other turn must pass before you can go again, whichever comes first. You can only break one disc per turn. And I'd stick to the rules, if I were you.

     

    "First turn goes to whoever gets it first. Now play!"

     

     

     

    survivordeev.png

     

    I broke one of Makaru's discs. Mostly on accident.

     

     

    neathumanbanner_zps79e20292.png

    Superpowers. Ha. The only powers you needed were those afforded you by your fun and springy fro.

     

    To make a point, you headbutted one of Emzee's disks. It broke, but your fro cushioned your head nicely.

    Hahli Husky: |||

    Deevee: |||

    Makaru: ||

    Kakaru: |||

    Janus: |||

    Emzee: ||

    Arpy: |||

     

     

     

    survivorkakaru1_zpsd1ba2689.png

     

    Makaru and Emzee were already down by one each. I reached over to break one of Arpy's discs to even the score. He saw my cutthroat tactic coming a mile away and quickly switched one of his discs with mine. I looked down at what I had done in horror and vowed to break one of his for sure next time.

     

    Hahli Husky: 3

    Deevee: 3

    Makaru: 2

    Kakaru: 2

    Janus: 3

    Emzee: 2

    Arpy: 3

     

     

     

    survivorjanus.png

     

    I watched as Arpy switched discs with Kakaru and helpfully offered to hold his own disc--before accidentally dropping it and somehow setting it on fire(?) Oops! Well, all's fair in love and war or something.

     

    Whatever, disc was broken, I guess. Grrrr and etc.

     

    Hahli Husky: 3

    Deevee: 3

    Makaru: 2

    Kakaru: 2

    Janus: 3

    Emzee: 2

    Arpy: 2

     

     

     

    survivordeev.png

    Well darn, I stepped on one of Makaru's. Bummer. :(

     

     

     

    neathumanbanner_zps79e20292.png

    Ugh, that lighter fluid up your sleeves was your least reliable illusion. You stared sadly at your broken disk for a moment before looking at Makaru, who was staring sadly at his only intact one.

     

    "Hey now," you said, "that just ain't right!"

     

    You slipped behind Deevee and grabbed one of his disks, which you hurled into the air and tried to shoot with a gun. This was made difficult by your lack of a gun, but the disk fell into the volcano and melted so it all worked out in the end.

    Hahli Husky: 3

    Deevee: 2

    Makaru: 1

    Kakaru: 2

    Janus: 3

    Emzee: 2

    Arpy: 2

     

    Staff Survivor II Game Topic

    in General Discussion

    Posted · Edited by Hahli Husky

     

    survivorarpy.png

     

    You put your hands up and touched the sky.

     

    And then you danced all the way to the volcano.

     

     

     

    survivoremzee.png

    After our meal, Tufi's voice was heard by all once again. It looks like the murder mystery would have to wait... even though I think we've all settled on it being Kakaru, and I was okay with that. As we headed up towards the volcano, I saw Makaru and Jakaru break into song and dance. It wasn't long before the dancing got to me too. Little did the two Canadians probably know, but I was also familiar with this song. And as much as I wish I could, I could not resist the safety dance.

    It was just so... safe.

     

     

     

    [Empress Jen]

     

    Somehow, despite the events of the past couple of months, the tribes still approached their next challenge on Mount Valmai with song. It wasn't totally inappropriate, and you could never go wrong with Canadian tunes. As everyone gathered at the base of the volcano, Tufi waited for the dancing to finish before speaking, because interrupting it just wouldn't be safe.

     

    "First off, folks," she said after what seemed like freaking forever, "your old tribes are dead and gone. You're now all part of one tribe, and that means you'll be competing directly against each other. No foul play, please. No more than we've already had.

     

    "Second, that means this is an individual immunity challenge. Only one of you is going to get it, and all the rest are fair game for voting. This week, you're not only playing for immunity, you're playing for the right to name your new tribe.

     

    "This week's challenge? Give me your best Piraka rap by Saturday. You've got the setting and you've clearly been warming up. Time to put it to good use."

     

     

     

    survivoremzee.png

    The Piraka Rap. A song that hurts my soul, until I remember it's just a creation, spear-headed by a European toy company. They meant no harm by it. How are they supposed to know who people like J Cole, Tupac, and Jay-Z are? (Okay maybe not Jay-Z he's been around awhile and he's still around) Remembering this makes me appreciate the so-bad-it's-good lyrical work for what it was supposed to be -- nothing serious.

    Still... you expect me to write that? Sure, I work on a lego fansite and collaborate with other role-players to help design a massive forum-based role playing game for people to pretend like they're a variation of the toys that we all loved do much... but even I have limits.

    I'm never one to walk away from a challenge. When the time eventually came to present my piece of writing, I came forward with this rap:

    Piraka en masse. Strong on the outside.

    Clowns on the loose. Fake on the inside.

    Multicolored coup that's looking like my Fruit Loops

    Who would love these sets? They're part of terrible groups!

    Though I guess they're better than the Inika toys.

    But right... this ain't about Inika -- it's about these Piraka boys!

    They potential in the story, but they think too small

    What makes them think that they deserve it all?

    Mask of Life? Nektann army while controlling people's minds?

    No sir! Thanks for playing man. Y'all need to check your frame of minds.

    I imagine this'd be better if we could just record ourselves

    Since rap with no flow is just poetry on the shelves

    But in the end, I must thank everyone for this opportunity

    I'll be sure to rap to this over Safety Dance samples -- FOR UNITY!

     

     

     

    survivorarpy.png

    A Piraka rap? Rap was most definitely not your jam. Your jam was strawberry, but you didn't want to be thrown into the volcano, so you gamely scraped together some words and stood up in front of the other Survivors after rehearsing to yourself a few times.

     

    You hit them with your best shot and fired away, just like Pat Benatar only with less rhythm, less musical accompaniment, and fewer total eclipses of the heart.

     

    "I call it Pirakapella," you said when you were done. Then you fainted from having done the entire thing in one breath.

     

     

     

    survivorhusky.png

     

    I had never ever even attempted anything close to rapping in my life.

    But I still had really strong feelings about the Piraka.

    Not to mention the original rap still burned in my brain from the countless times I had to listen to it against my will.

    I shuddered, then used my nervous twitching to propel me into a beat.

    "Oh, no ... piranha?

    Ugh, no, Piraka

     

    Oh god they're on the loose?

    LEGO, what'd you do

    This rap just improves

    The reason I'm through

     

    Bigger, basic, and ugh those teeth, too

    And this ache that shakes my brain to goo

     

    Oh, no, Piraka

    Still singin this "groove"

    Nothin I can do

    I tried, but I

    Can't make the TV mute

     

    Ugh no, Piraka

    Voya Nui has a street?

    It's "Takanuva", not "Taka"

    I suspect this is abuse

     

    What even is "school-lacka"??

    That's not my home, dude?

    What is this thing

    There's nothing I can do

    This ad is on the loose!

     

    God, no, Piraka

     

    Why a rap seemed so neat

    I don't even have a clue

    This schlock, makin me weak

    "That's a lot to ... eat"??

     

    The Trigger, the Tracer, the Drifter,

    The Snake, the Beast, the Bully,

    What are these names

     

    Piraka!

     

    Yo, no Piraka

    Piraka, go Piraka

     

    Piraka, go Piraka

     

    Go as in leave, Piraka

     

    Piraka, why Piraka

     

    Hey, yo, no, Piraka

     

    Okay shut up now Piraka

     

    I can't take anymore, Piraka

     

    God, Piraka

     

    Bye, Piraka

     

    I'm done now, Piraka

     

    Ugh, god, no, Piraka."

    Great. Now the original rap would no doubt torment my mind for days.

    I covered my ears to block out the rapping of everyone else, humming The Safety Dance again to comfort myself.

    cat-covers-ears_zps6e6a6af9.jpg

     

     

     

    survivordeev.png

    The "Best Piraka Rap"? I sat to think to myself. Who even was the best Piraka? I mean, that was clearly what the challenge was, after all.

    Of course, as an avid fan of the storyline, I knew immediately who the best Piraka was. After all, there was no choice in the matter!

     

    Today was a good day, or maybe a good night?

    Who knows what time it is, in the absence of all light?

    But me, I don't care, I'm feeling more than alright!

    I came from the Beast, but Vezon is twice bright.

    Vezon has no time for Toa, for what is a Toa?

    Just an ugly Skakdi, so send me s'mo-uh!

    Sometimes I see double, or did I say double?

    Forget it, for Vezon is double and will double your trouble.

    Forget what you've heard, Vezon don't suffer Piraka

    They're spines are so weak- you should call them Brutaka

    I took the treasure, it's mine, wait now maybe I'm its?

    Whatever I don't care, I'm crazy- the mask fits.

    I'm half of the Beast, but twice his mind.

    I stay on this spider and it stays on my grind.

    Cursed though they say, and maybe that's true.

    But Vezon laughs at those ill-fated dudes

    I've got a spider and you don't.

    I've got a life and after this, you won't.

    And though I may act like a fool,

    It's really so you won't recognize me-

    For I'm Deadpool.

     

     

     

    survivorarpy.png

     

    You regained consciousness to see Bfahome just standing there, shoegazing.

     

    You slapped him on the back to shock him out of his trance, and he choked on his own spit with a noise that sounded like 'Thok' and then doubled over coughing, which you thought sounded kind of like beatboxing.

     

    That would have to do.

     

     

     

     

    survivorkakaru1_zpsd1ba2689.png

     

    I recalled that I had a bit of a phobia towards poetry, but if it meant being able to name my own team "The Schizo Tuna Cultists" I would do my best.

     

    I hacked up the phlegm from the back of my throat and began my best imitation of a dial up modem.

     

    4335711f62cb7b0aabb91cb405e996c7_zps9f49

     

    What up yo the name's Kakaru

    my bff is currently Makaru

    and also Janus 'cause he's my dad

    and also Deevs 'cause he's real rad

     

    We're all stuck on Voya-Nui

    we haven't eaten in a week which is pretty screwy

    I tried to eat something which was not a corpse

    you know this song's about storyline now, ya dorks

     

    Bohrok are matoran? Greg, give me a break

    Velika is a god? Go jump in a lake

    you know we're rewriting history from here on out

    now I'mma drop the bass and tell you what it's about

     

    See, I'd be rappin bout Piraka but they're not here

    we're not playin in their canon cause we rule this year

    Brutaka's also gone I think they're all retconned

    but it's nothing worse than every other storyline bomb

     

    Hey, Tufi's in charge now, our story is tight

    first we murder all day then we dance all night

    Toa don't kill? Okay, so nobody's dead

    but we're not Toa and we still bleed red

     

    Piraka were neat, yo, don't get me wrong

    but if not for them I wouldn't be doing this song

    if we were Piraka I'd call dibs on Thok

    cause he just sat on a couch during the animations and that's what I'd be doing right now if I weren't standing around this volcano making poetry and beatboxing like nobody's business actually I think that couch would be really neat hey Tufi what if I made a couch out of corpses is that against the rules

     

    wait I mean uh

     

     

    tumblr_mseqt7v7PZ1sz4xibo2_500_zps51fa73

     

     

     

     

    survivormakaru_zpsa4970a3c.png

    The empress wants the best rap, eh? What better rap than a rap battle.
    I looked over at Janus.
    "EPIC RAP BATTLES OF VOYA NUIIIIIIIIII!!"
    "ZAKTAN VS VEZON"
    BEGIN

     

     

     

    survivorjanus.png

     

    I knew I was in an epic rap battle, but I didn't even know where I was (a volcano apparently) or even who I was rapping against. I glanced around at my fellow--fellows (i guess that's what we're called now?) before finding my eyes resting on Makaru--who had apparently grafted a skull of some sort to his head. Okay, so he was Vezon. Got it.

     

    I got in touch with my inner snake (who happened to be made of protodites, or whatever those little things were called.) and began busting out some SICK RHYMES YO.

    "Yo move over, loser. You think you're pretty clever.

    If I let you go first, man, you'll probably talk forever.

    I ain't never seen anyone chew a scene like you do,

    The only reason you were ever one of us is because you got split in two

    You clearly got the mouth, Yeah you think you're so great

    You found the Ignika, got two minds and still can't think straight!

     

    Yo, we asked your next of kin, said you belong in a museum

    I said why stop there, we'll make this your mausoleum!

    Your only trait is that you're crazy, look like you were crafted from spare pieces

    And nobody wanted to buy your stupid special edition releases

    So you're Greg's favourite character But you got nobody fooled

    You should have been a rewrite, you should have been dead-pooled"

     

    willsmithrunningmanandrappingfamilyguy_z

     

     

     

    survivormakaru_zpsa4970a3c.png

    "Breaking the fourth wall already? Hmm, what a swell thought
    Stop stealing from me, Snake, sit down, you look so overwrought
    You're the leader of the pack, you're so powerful and command respect
    So how come you got beat by a bunch of All Karzahni rejects?
    You keep dissing people way more powerful than you.
    Got turned into bugs then got turned into eel stew
    And your pack of miscreants? The Gang on the loose?
    They got sacked by nightlight-faced Toa and now they're ready for the noose.
    The Bully? The Drifter? The Trigger? You pathetic protodite.
    You're less like a scary clan and more like a bunch of dwarves lookin' for Snow White
    You're the worst minions of Makuta since the Rahi, it's canonical.
    No one even wants you here, not even Bring Back Bionicle."
    tumblr_mopzhzbdra1squcpjo1_250_zps4bd679

     

    JANUS

    in Bionicle-Based Creations

    Posted

    This is me. I am immortalized in LEGO form, this is a thing a beauty and joy and glory. I love this thing (and the green version is pretty also!)

     

    Also while I don't usually visualize myself with a Miru, I have to say that this actually pulls it off. Plus my sword wings are awesome and beautiful and lovely.

     

    Pat you are a lovely human being and I am terrible at responding and thing.

     

    I LOVE YOU AND I'M SORRY.

    I WIN. MY WIN. ARIN WINS SILVER WINS SONIC WINS

    in General Discussion

    Posted

    JENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. Don't you dare mention that game that isn't a game. UNLESS you are talking about METROID FUSION in which I forgive you and love you <3

     

    Also Bryan oh hey Big Zam!

     

    Micah: YOU BETTER GIVE ME SOME LEAVES BOY. THOSE LEAVES ARE MINE.

     

    Mandrew: I know it hurts to admit it, but we have to accept that there's always someone better than us. In this case it just happens to me.

     

    Everyone else except for Becca: Hey, you guys are cool. Thanks for coming by and wishing me one year closer to death. It's pretty awesome of you.

     

    Becca: You are amazing and I love you and thank you for Lasagna and also the gingerale and also being amazing and also incredible and also congratulations on making this topic finally. YAY.

    BZPower Status

    in BZPower.com News Discussion

    Posted

    Looking at some of the posts here.

     

    I am so glad I retired from Staff.

     

    While I understand your frustration, you might want to consider that attacking the people who are trying their best to make this an enjoyable environment---might not be the smartest. They might get burned out and do exactly what you are accusing them of. IE: Not caring.

     

    But aside from that listen to Pat/DeeVee because he is genius and beautiful <3

    Hanus - old topic

    in Off Topic Culture

    Posted

    [???]: Well, that was fun0053.gif0053b.gifOh. The fun has just begun. You have big plans. Jumbo plans. Plans that will be jotted down in PERMANENT MARKER.[???]: Put the plan into action0054.gifShe'll be coming for you any second. She will do whatever she can to stop your brilliant plans. All of them.[???]: RUN NOW WHILE YOU CAN0055.gifThis is also a good plan yes.[???]: Dont cause any more trouble0056.gifTrouble? You?Never.[???]: OTP 4 LYFE0057.gifDang skippy, son. OTP Representin in the hizindustrial laboratory complex.[???]: OH NO HERE SHE COMES0058.gif0058b.gif0058c.gif0058d.gif0058e.gifYou perform a standard NINJA WALL KICK to evade detection.[???]: Cease running, play cookie game0059.gifYou never stopped playing. Grandma's cookies are irresistible, and clicking on those fat chunked beauties is an unavoidable pleasure. You find yourself clicking them everywhere - in the bathroom, in the shower, in bed. Sometimes you stay up all night just clicking by yourself over and over. You can't stay away from her round treats.They're simply too delicious.[???]: Enter name0060.gifPerfect.[Ninja Mcpirate]: Enter real name.0061.gifFine. Your name is Robert Cox. You just go by Ninja Mcpirate for short.

    You can make Ninja McPirate dance to your twisted whims by submitting commands here.

×
×
  • Create New...