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TLhikan

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Posts posted by TLhikan

  1. It took me a second to catch that Koronga was in an illusion cage, so well done on that :D.

     

    Not sure what typo you mean there, it looks in order to me.

     

     

    I was under the impression that it should be "My face will need to be cleaned off" or "My face will need cleaning off", but I could be wrong.

     

    -TLhikan

  2. Both the description of the way the Bohrohk work in synergy to clear off Mata Nui's face and the purpose of the Krana's mind control where really creative (and yeah, answered by question from last time :P). 

     

    One typo I noticed: 

     

     

     

     "my face will need cleaned off."

     

    (Unless there's some rule of English I don't know, which is most assuredly possible  :fear: ).

     

    -TLhikan

  3. This was probably one of the most interesting chapters, and the ending was great. It'll be fun to see any other alien worlds that Mata Nui may arrive on. I can't help but wonder what will happen if Mata Nui lands on a world where the inhabitants are the kind that get suspicious about random islands appearing out of nowhere, and *can't* be scared off by our hero...

     

    -TLhikan

  4. Zaktan just got about twice as terrifying as before :P.

     

    The level of detail is neat; it resembles Protodax enough to be a protodite, but more... microby.

     

    -TLhikan

    • Upvote 1
  5. No lasers from that sword Koronga :P

     

     

    This chapter was a bit lighter than what we've had, although it does begin with the fact that Koronga actually did die. I was expecting him to wake up with his body deformed into a Kharzahni-produced Matoran, so I guess this is an improvement.

     

     

     

    -TLhikan.

    • Upvote 2
  6. It just keeps getting more cheerful, doesn't it :P?

    But really, the bleakness and insanity of Karzhani and his realm really comes across; the story fits really well with the somewhat disturbing images (those are from the Atlas, right?). 

     

    Teridax and the other Makuta's characterizations are also of note; while they still seem to be rather decent people, the first hints of superiority are starting to creep in. 

     

    Good stuff as always!
     

    -TLhikan

    • Upvote 1
  7.  

     

    We can't all, and some of us don't.

     

    <_<

     

    :P

     

     

     

    :Well said; not much to add there.  :) I'd just add that something specific from his visions is also having a strong hold over him -- the fact that something was so traumatic to see, his mind forced him to forget it (along with a lot else). And he has no idea what it was. That is a big part of why he's being both pessimistic and "bland" -- he's terrified to take action that might cause that to happen, so he's trying to "lurk before he leaps" as it were, so that when he does take action it will be effective (he hopes). And of course there's more to it I can't discuss. 

     

    Thanks! And yeah, now that you explain it, the visions he has and the memories he doesn't have are bound to be pretty traumatic as well.

     

    Regarding the chapter: First off, those are awesome Zyglak sketches.

     

    Your portrayal of the Zyglak and their slaughtering of Lesovikk's team is pretty brutal, so it's easy to see how broken this will leave him.

     

    Koronga has that Forest Gump-like ability to always be where history is happening, although in his case, it seems to be part of his destiny. 

     

    And like Fishers said, nice cliffhanger.

     

    -TLhikan 

    • Upvote 3
  8. I agree that Koronga sounds like a bit of a Eeyore from time to time, but in fairness to him, he's already seen his home torn up by war and then torn up literally, and is going to see a lot more horrible things between now and when Mata Nui re-forms Spherus Magna. 

     

    Mata Nui, on the other hand, is dealing with creatures that to him may as well be stomach bacteria or white blood cells; it's not hard to understand why he seems to be unaware of the natures of both the Great Beings and the Makuta.

     

    Still, it's a interesting dynamic between Koronga's constant dread and Mata Nui's blissfully ignorant naivete.  

    • Upvote 2
  9. Great work as usual. Mata Nui's thoughts are especially interesting; I wonder how "mature" his mind was at that state?

     

    The idea of being able to study one's own body would be really cool (although to the best of my knowledge, I have no sentient creatures living inside me :P).

  10.  

     

    I -was- unsure what to call it, though; mind training or what. I was going to say something about brain challenges, but then I thought, do they know the word for brain?

    I would have used the term "mental exercises", speaking for myself.

     

    I liked this chapter, although it seems clear that the DoB history is going to have to vary slightly from the Official one just because of our narrator. But, l like it :D.

     

    This is more of a canon question than one pertaining to your story, but how did the Mata's muscles rot if they where in energy stasis? Is that just how it works?

     

    Also, did Gali paint her mask yellow briefly :P?

    • Upvote 2
  11. I really liked the last two chapters; I've always felt sort of disconnected to the whole Spherus Magna part of the story, maybe just because it only really came in at the end or whatever, but now that we're in the MU and seeing the original Toa, it just feels more Bionicle-like.

     

    -TLhikan

  12. Great chapter; you really captured the emotional and physical aspects of the Shattering. I had always been sort of bugged by how people survived so easily being flung into space on a rock, but Mata Nui using his powers to cushion the breakaway is a really cool idea.

     

    I also like your explanations of things like moral light/shadow and the fact that masks cause unconsciousness, although I wonder the GBs got the idea from studying Koronga, or did something else happen? The question of who it was that designed Koronga still bugs me, but hey, that's part of the mystery :P.

     

    Re:Wheels: The specific instance was when the Inika met Umbra; Jaller was surprised at the notion of someone "walking on their gears". While it could be like you said, that the Matoran are just so used to walking systems that work better, it felt like a mindset thing when I read it. But I don't know :P.

     

    (On the other hand, Jaller isn't an engineer; Nuparu could have been perfectly familiar with wheels, but never needed to use them due to knowing how to make walking machines).

     

    -TLhikan

    • Upvote 1
  13. Regarding the tech thing, part of the spirit of Bionicle is schizio tech. If we recall, Jaller was surprised by the concept of wheels :P. We had sentient clockwork brained-Vahki in Metru Nui, but non-protodermic flight was just taking off (and heck, we don't know what the moto-sled was powered by),

     

    I think it's canon that mechanical implants aren't cybernetics; they're no computer chips or the like like we would know them, but there is GB-tech that allows them to be used as a person's natural arm/leg/joint/respiratory system/etc. So, their information technology may be nothing like what we use.

    When it comes to weapons, this is a bit more of a obvious "flaw", but really, it's one that comes from Lego's desire to steer away from showing "real" guns (which seems to have been thrown out the window lately ;) ), and it would just wouldn't fit the flavor for Bionicle characters to be spraying each other with machine guns. In the EM, maybe.

     

    If that doesn't really make sense, hey, chalk it up Bionicle physics not being the same as ours :D .

     

    -TLhikan

    • Upvote 1
  14. It's always fascinating to read your take on shapeshifting characters. It's fairly evident in the Paracosmos series as well. I don't know a lot of writesr who ahve your level of creativity in just how versatile complete shapeshifting would be.

     

    -TLhikan

  15. This is cool; I was wondering how our hero will manage to be there for most of the history of Bionicle while remaining anonymous.

     

    And the tactic of using shapeshifting to store things is always cool (brings up the question though: Could he use his power to create things?).

     

    -TLhikan

  16. Nice chapter. I like the excuse Koronga has for the way he eats as a Matoran :P.

     

    One thing I didn't understand: Why did he have to remove his mask to fit through the cave entrance the EP made for him? Is his mask that big compared to his body?

     

    TL -- Yeah, it was a graphic novel exclusive, as I understand it. I haven't seen directly it myself but those images are from BS01. Here's the page that summarizes its events, and a searchlink showing all BS01's images from it:

    http://biosector01.com/wiki/index.php/All_Our_Sins_Remembered
    http://biosector01.com/wiki/index.php?title=Special:Search&limit=500&offset=0&redirs=0&profile=images&search=AOSR

     

    Cool, thanks.

    -TLhikan

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