You!

*Points at you*

Are you sick and tired of your boring, average, [insert noun]? Well then come on down to [insert Proper noun ending with 's] [insert first noun] Fixer-Uper Shop!

We've got tons of different [insert plural object to fix up noun] to fix up your [first noun]. We even have a special on [girly product] in Isle 7! Tee hee hee!

So come on down to [The proper noun] [first noun] Fixer-Uper Shop to-DAY!