What follows is an exchange on IM betwixt myself and a friend of mine.

FRIEND: Go see the Iron Man movie!

SELF: Pretty much 90% of movies based on comic books fill me with intense rage, and none of the exceptions are superhero ones. Yeh.

FRIEND: yeah but this one is good

FRIEND: and I didn't even know that you had loyalties to mainstream comics in the first place

SELF: Mostly old school Silver Age Marvel, which probably explains why I hate most of them.

FRIEND: go see it

FRIEND: well, gots to be going. Take my advice you won't regret it I swear. Stay after the credits!

So. Should I take his advice and go see the Iron Man movie? Keep in mind that yes, indeed, nearly all movies based on comic books fill me with intense rage. The only ones that I have seen and have not hated are Ghost World, American Splendor, Men In Blac.k (LOL IT'S CENSORED WHEN I MEAN THE MOVIE), 300 and um, Akira, Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind, Persopolis, Osamu Tezuka's Metropolis, um . . .

Yeah. That's kinda it.

I have vowed to never again see a movie based off of a superhero comic ever again, since while quirky independent movies and anime will sometimes end up being entertaining, I have never seen a superhero film that didn't give me that good ol' intense rage. I've tried! Believe me, I've tried!

This vow will probably end due to the fact that, apparently, they are making a Luke Cage movie. And a Nick Fury movie. And oh god, they're even making a Namor film. A NAMOR FILM. WHAT. WHAT WHAT WHAT. NOT ALLOWED! NO! NAMOR IS NOT SELLABLE! HE WEARS A BLOODY SPEEDO AND IS BASICALLY A VILLIAN THAT I LOVE. SHOO! SHOO! GO MAKE ANOTHER MOVIE BASED OFF OF . . . UM . . . SOMEONE . . .

CURSE YOU MARVEL! WHY MUST I ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT YOU? WHY MUST YOU MAKE FILMS THAT ARE SO PROFITABLE THAT YOU START RAIDING MY BELOVED OBSCURE-TYPE CHARACTERS AND PUTTING THEM IN PLACES OTHER THAN THE '60S? WHY?