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The Space Wolves


Jonestown Bartender

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spw3.jpg

 

Wolfy McWolferson from the Planet Wolf has wolf claws and is half-wolf. He is a wolf rider and has something of the Wulfen. Every day he wakes up and eats wolf food, then puts on his wolf-gear. He does his wolf exercises and goes wolf scouting around his wolf-den (campsite). He passes a Lone Wolf, and the two share a quick nod before the Wolf-Scout moves on. Suddenly, an eldar steps out of hiding to challenge him! He fires his wolf-bolter at it, and suffers only minor injuries, mostly protected by his wolf-hide. Moments later, he stands over his defeated foe and howls. Other wolf marines, with their specially tuned ears, can detect by his howling that he has slain a foe in combat. They assemble into a wolf pack and jump into a wolf assault vehicle to join him.

 

Back at the base, the alpha wolf receives a comm signal telling him that eldar are attacking. He is prepared to die defending his wolf den, he will not run away with his tail between his legs like a dog.

 

No, he is a space wolf.

 

 

 

 

Nice work Game workshop :\

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This morning I woke up to the silence of a wolf not howling, and then I got out of my bed (which, I may add, is not composed of wolf products), I walked up my stairs (upon which no wolves are allowed to tread) and then ate some cereal that did not bear a logo on the front box (particularly not one of a wolf).

 

I then proceeded to brush my teeth using toothpaste without wolf-related ingredients and washing my mouth out with water from a stream (in which no wolves had access to). I then took a shower and used non-animal-tested products (that includes wolves, upon which they were not tested) and then I dried myself off with a towel not made of wolf fur.

 

I then dressed up (with clothes that were sewn in a factory in which wolves are not allowed) and then I loaded my backpack without any items that would in any way make an underlying connection to wolves. I then hopped into my car (which had been just cleaned, and, as such, bore no trances of wolf presence) and then I was dropped off at school (at which our non-existent mascot happens to not be a wolf).

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The Imperial Guard dies all the time, The Tau own a tiny speck of space and got their butts kicked by the Imperial Navy, The Orks just trash stuff, The Tyranids zerg-rush everything, Chaos is so beset by infighting and factionalism that nothing ever gets done(plus Abaddon the one who fails 13 times), The Eldar are almost extinct and totally up themselves, the Dark Eldar cower in the webway, and the Necrons are generic terminator robot godmoders.

 

The Space Marines are the only competent, individualistic, and useful army.

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The Imperial Guard dies all the time, The Tau own a tiny speck of space and got their butts kicked by the Imperial Navy, The Orks just trash stuff, The Tyranids zerg-rush everything, Chaos is so beset by infighting and factionalism that nothing ever gets done(plus Abaddon the one who fails 13 times), The Eldar are almost extinct and totally up themselves, the Dark Eldar cower in the webway, and the Necrons are generic terminator robot godmoders.

 

The Space Marines are the only competent, individualistic, and useful army.

But I love my infighting and factionalism.

 

 

Also Tau only fail in fluff they're pretty good for table top.

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And Space Marines and Orks (if the person is competent) and Eldar (Aspect Warriors).

 

That's why fluff > tabletop, because the game rules are terrible anyway.

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And Space Marines and Orks (if the person is competent) and Eldar (Aspect Warriors).

 

That's why fluff > tabletop, because the game rules are terrible anyway.

Eldar still die so I'm happy.

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