Well, this here's the story of what happened to a man named Azaran. Not those lies they tell you about kidnappings and burlap sacks, but his actual misadventures. This here tale I'm-a going to unfold, happened in about the hundr'd1 n' fifties. As in, 'tween hundr'd n' fifty, and 59. How do I know what happened? Well, technically I was there, man.
Now, don'chu be confuddled, Azaran isn't the main protagonist. Neither am I. This chronicle revolves around a man named Kandarii. He's a professional fisherman. Not in the good way, like, being on the telly (Which, I dunno, may or may not happ'n.). He's a pro fisherman in the other way, as in, it's his only source of income. That, n' bein' a guitarist. Enough of my ramblings, we....we.... Oh, let's just start the dern'd story.
What Really Happened to Azeran
Metru-Nui, mid 150's, BGC
Kandarii had been wandering about the plains, when a small boy approached him. The small boy asked him, "Want to play Hide-and-Seek?"
Kandarii's reply was, "Well, sure."
So, the boy began to count down from 10, and Kandarii fled at full sprint. He ran through the field, past the All-Mart, and all the way until he was in Ga-Metru. He didn't stop there. He continued until he was on a large building. Looking behind him, he thought, No regrets. He leaped.
It was a dry and sandy day in the deserts, somewhere, when an unknown figure came tumbling down from a cliff-side. He landed abruptly. Yes, it's Kandarii. Kandarii without a beard, and dressed in a hood, tunic,robes, fancy trousers, and fresh looking boots. He had a scimitar, for some reason. He kept running, looking behind him for the small boy he thought was pursuing him. He found an oasis. He jumped in the water, hoping for a good place to hide. He resurfaced a few seconds later. It was midnight, he had a shotgun, and eyed Super Mutants. Run, he thought.
And so he did. Before long, the super mutants had disappeared from view. He was still being chased by the boy, he was sure. He entered a shack. After short while, he exited the shack. What happened? He was in combat armor, back in Ga-Metru, and armed with a...musket. What were these, abominations? They looked and smelt like dinosaurs, but were yelling in bizarre, deep voices. Ultimately, he was crushed.
Kandarii woke up abruptly. What...What happened? He asked himself. He was in his bed, and it appeared that someone poured apple juice on his pants. So he got out of bed, got dressed, and groggily prepared breakfast, contemplating his dreams.
A knock on the door. He opened it, slowly. Outside was a small boy, who began to ask: "Want to-"
Kandarii slammed the door in the boy's face. You see, he looks almost exactly like the boy in his dreams. Another knock on the door. Kandarii opens it again, to see Azaran, his good friend, and the local drunkard2. He was sober, for the time being. He looked similar to Kandarii, in the way he had a beard, a hunting hat, and a stylish, old-fashioned pair of glasses.
"What is up, Fishman?" He asked.
"I had this bizarre dream." Kandarii reported.
"Dude, you probably shouldn't have eaten so much fish. I hear the pollution makes the fish, make people sick."
"C'mon, Azeran. we both know that's a load."
1. It's a dialect. Misspellings are on purpose.
2. Metru-Nui can't really have a "Town Drunk" because it's simply too big.