Kryst Cyclone Posted October 29, 2011 Share Posted October 29, 2011 (edited) Alright, after about a year (I think), BZP is back!!!Anyway, this is my latest comedy, a parody of the Resident Evil series and inspired by hundreds of parody videos , here is it.Resident ZeroChapter 1: The Big...... Mall?Metru-Nui Police Department (MNPD)'s STARS (Stupid Toas And Rice Services) team is an elite team that investigate mysterious incidents in Metru-Nui. In this scene, one of the two STARS team, Banana Team is in the scene with Terry (if you know who really is this dude, don't tell) The Leader and the Toa Nuva (tahu, Gali, Lewa, Kopaka, Onua and Pohatu). The Toa Nuva is slowly coming into the scene.Jaller: I wonder where Terry is?Wait a minute, the Toa Inika? What happened to the Toa Nuva?Matoro (who is not dead for saving the universe, this is an alternate dimension): We are the new Banana Team, Nikitos Nui(NN) is too cheap to pay the Toa Nuva.NN: Uh hehehehehe.....(Flashback)NN: What's this? You only pick up a dried up bubble gum and I though you picked up 10 cents?Tanma: YepNN: And I wasted so much money to build a movie theater and so much ultra-expensive plan just to get that 10 cents off you?Tanma: Keep going...NN: and now I'm sort of bankrupt and found out that you only picked up a dried-up bubble gum?Tanma: You won.NN: AAAAAAAAAAaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... *A extremely long and harsh censored word*(End flashback)Hahli: Ok... why does this scene looked familiar?Kongu: COOOFFFFFFFFFFEEEEEEEEEEE!What's with him?NN: I used my universe altering abilities to turn Kongu into a coffee addict...Nuparu: Why?NN: Come on, I'm making a new kind of comedy. I don't want to make him tree-speak all the time like the other comedies, that will be too cliche.Hewkii: Freak.NN: What did you said?Hewkii: I said freak.Suddenly, there was a bright flash and then we see Hewkii is PINK!!!Hewkii: OK, that was odd I felt nothing and.... OH MY GOSH, I'M PINK!NN: That was for calling me a freak. Wait a minute, I actually am a freak.Hewkii: Please change me back, I'm already looked bad in orange but now I'm pink, how am I gonna impress my fans?NN: Hey, the Pink Panther is pink but he has millions of fans around the world.Hewkii: Please, change me back.NN: I would love to since I admitted that I'm indeed a freak but I got about 1000 likes because of our little conversation. If I change you back, my reputation will be ruined. So by the power of He-Who-Must-Never-Be-Mentioned, you will be pink for the rest of this comedy. :evilgrin:Hewkii: Nnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooooooo...One week later..Hewkii: ooooooooooooooooooooooooo.........Another week later...Hewkii: ooooooooooooooooooooo.............So many weeks later that I felt lazy to say how many...Hewkii: ooooooooooooooooooo................Jaller slapped himHewkii: Thanks man.Where's Nui?Jaller: He left while you were "no-ing"?Hewkii: Wait, Nikitos Nui, come back... Nnnnnnooooo..Jaller: Don't make me take out my Cordak blasters.Hewkii: :ninja:Terry: So you are my new team.Kongu: Hi boss, you got coffee?Terry: Let me guess, Nikitos Nui transformed him into a coffee addict in order to make this comedy interesting?Hahli: Like, yeah.Terry: Ok.. here is our mission. Metru Team's helicopter has gone missing in the Metru Nui's forest. Our mission, investigate it while I find my Makuta-Virus. I MEAN.. find my teddy bear.Toa Mahri: :wassup:Terry: Shut up.toa Mahri: :lol-sign:Terry: I said shut up!Toa Mahri: :superfunny:Terry: (Fire his AK-47 to the roof) I SAID SHUT THE *censored word* UP!Part of the ceiling dropped on him.Terry: :evilbiggrin:Toa Mahri: Uh-oh...Later...Toa Mahri: Make it stop! Make it stop! I hate Rebecca Black! My non-existant ears are not existing bleeding.Terry: Mwahahahahaha!Jaller: Oh yeah, there's no forest in Metru Nui.Terry: Actually, Nikitos Nui convinienly put it right behind the MNPD building.Toa Mahri: Curse you, Nikitos NuiMeanwhile, on Earth..NN: Hey, do you hear anything?NN's friend: Nope.NN: Weird, it sounded like the Toa Mahri are cursing meback at the conviniently placed Metru-Nui Forest.Jaller: Guys, I found the choppa!Kongu: Is there coffee in there?Jaller: NoKongu: Aw, man. http://www.bzpower.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/sighw.gifHahli: ,the copter is like, full of non-existant blood.Hewkii: And the trail is heading towards that... big, spooky..... shopping mall?Nuparu: Weird, isn't it supposed to be a mansion?Hahli: LIKE, SHOPPING!!!All but Hahli: Nikitos Nui!Back on Earth,NN: Dude, i hear it again.NN's friend (an Indian): Dude, that must be some preety bad karma.Back at the forest...Zombies appeared...Nuparu: OMG, it's the Joker.Suddenly, the Joker (Jack Nicolson version) randomly appeared and hit Nuparu with a malletJoker(JN): Do they have my handsome face?The Joker leaves the comedy...The zombies are going to devour the team when they saw Hewkii...Zombies: http://www.bzpower.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/alien2.gif :superfunny:Jaller: Quick, run to the shopping mall!!!Terry: Hey, that's my line.Jaller: Fine.terry: Quick, run to the shopping mall!!!Jaller: Hm.....To be continued-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Words:803.So how's my new comedy on the new forum? Come on, comment, please?PS: Terry is Terridax (Spoilers) Edited December 10, 2011 by Nikitos Nui Quote Toa Nikitos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kryst Cyclone Posted October 30, 2011 Author Share Posted October 30, 2011 (edited) Chapter deleted Edited March 17, 2012 by Nikitos Nui Quote Toa Nikitos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kryst Cyclone Posted December 6, 2011 Author Share Posted December 6, 2011 Sorry about the delay. Anyway...Chapter New 2-A Mission and the last chapter is the worst.As we last see our really stupid and lame zeroes super awesome and more awesome heroes, they are fighting zombies but since Nikitos Nui deleted Chapter 2 with his author powers that is bestowed in every BZP comedy writers, they do not remember him being an alien.Hahli: OMG! Like! We are, like surrounded!Hewkii (still pink): Ahh...Others(including the zombies): No swearing in BIONICLE!!Nuparu: I have an idea but I need coffee to do itKongu:CCCOOOOFFFFFFFEEEE!!!!Nuparu:Ok.... All I need is a coffee machine. We need 1200 tons of coffee bean, some random gears, John Williams's orchestra...Jaller: Or we could take that coffee machine that is right in the shop right behind us.Nuparu: Or that...Jaller smashes the glass but the glass is very thick and not a single crack is found on the glass.Jaller: Owww, my handHewkii: Why can he...Kongu: BECAUSE HE USED EMOTION AND YOU DO NOT SO GIVE ME MY COFFEE!!!!!!Hewkii: Ahhh... Happy?Everyone including the zombies: :biggrin:Matoro: What if I freeze the glass as it could weaken it's molecular structure....12 hours later...Matoro: ...therefore by the law of Newton and Physics and Chemistry, that should break the glass.Everyone(this time include myself): :drool:Then, Terry comes down and shoots down all the zombies surrounding the zeroes...Toa Inika: I can hear you.Heroes. There, happy?Terry: Are you guys okay?Toa Inika: We...Terry: Whew... I though that you guys are almost consumed by zombies which suddenly Nuparu planned to feed Kongu with coffee and asked for a few random stuffs including John William's orchestra. But then, Jaller mention about a shop with a coffee machine behind you guys and he hit the glass but broke his arm and then Matoro wanted to freeze the glass while explaining for 12 hours.Toa Inika: Errr... actually...Henry: Never mind... HE has a mission for you guys...Terry shows out his IPad and Nikitos Nui appear on the screen.NN: Toa Inika... I have a mission for you all.Toa Inika: Nikitos Nui is trapped in a box. IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!!!NN: No you dummies. I'm safe in my room. This iscalled an IPad. It transmit my messages. Now as I am investigating the cause of the zombies, I found out that the Ignika is found in the Artic gone out of control, reanimating every dead body in our worlds. So your mission is to stop the Ignika from rampaging.Jaller: Why don't you use your author power?NN: My powers don't work in my world but I can poof you out some gadgets. First, the disk-shooting CD-player.Kongu: What does this botton do?NN: DON'T TOUCH IT!!!Kongu press the button anyway. A disk is shoot out from the CD-player. The disk richotcheted from corner to corner, sliced Icarax's arm in the process and then sliced through the CD-player. It exploded.NN: Never mind... Next, the Enchancenator.Matoro: What does this button do?NN: DON'T TOUCH IT... AGAIN!!!Matoro touched the button anyway and his intellegence enchanced.Matoro: So by the law of Isaac Newton or Archimedes or Da Vinci or...345,947,495,056,123,456,789,000.1 hours...Matoro:... or Physics that this device will be useful in our appointed task in world saving. Whoa, did I said that?NN: Unfortunately, that device only can be used once. The third, Poseidon's Trident.Hahli: Like, what does this button do?NN: EVEN THE TRIDENT HAVE A BUTTON ?!?!??!??Hahli pressed the button and a tsunami sweeped over Spherus Magna.Reporter: This is the worst weather in BIONICLE history since The Shattering. It as seems that Old Man Poseidon is visiting here.Poseidon: Who are you calling old?Reporter: Oh no....The reporter is dragged into the water by Poseidon and he snatched back his trident from Hahli.NN: You cool dudes.Toa Inika: But we're your cool dudes.NN: Number 4, Living-Lava-in-The-Can. I'm only poofing you guys one.Jaller: What does this button do?NN: DDDDDDDoooooooooonnnnnnnnnn'ttttttttttttJaller presses the button and the living lava chases himJaller: See you guys later. (Runs off with lava in pursuit)NN: The fifth, the drill-i-nator(patent pending)Nuparu: What does this button do?NN: NNNNNNNOoooooooooooooooooooo......Nuparu presses the button and the drill-i-nator(patent pending) drills through Spherus Magna, splitting it to two.NN: Finally, the most simplest gadget with no buttons, The Voice Changing Mints.Jaller have out run the lava: Man I'm tired, ooohhh, mints :bowdown:NN: Don't....oohhh never mind.Jaller eats all the mints.Jaller: Why am I in a squeky voice? NIKITOS NUI!!!Everyone: :superfunny:NN: Very well, that's all and good luck. But first..NN used his author powers to changeeverything back to normal, except Hewkii's colour and Jaller's voice. Then, the IPad is gone.Hewkii: Wait, I haven't test my gadgetJaller: Wait, my voice.Both: NNNNnnnoooooooooooo...Next: Mission Impossible... literally.Words: 814HENSHIN Quote Toa Nikitos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kryst Cyclone Posted March 17, 2012 Author Share Posted March 17, 2012 Chapter 3- Did Anyone noticed the mistake at the last chapter?Hewkii (still pink): Yeah, why were we Toa Inika at the last chapter? WAIT A MINUTE, WE WOULD HAVE USED LIGHTNINH AGAINST THOSE ZOMBIES!!OK, how do you get in here?Hewkii: Umm... Internet?Wise guy, aren't ya, Pinky ? Well I'm gonna torture ya until you tell me the answer.Hewkii: :upset:Now back to the Toa Inika Mahri, excluding Hewkii.Kongu: By the way, where is Hewkii?I kidnapped him you fools and I'm gonna torture him, MUAHAHAHAH... Bathroom?Kongu: Works for me.Matoro: Toa Mahri Kongu, can I question you about the procedure of the way you cleared out from your coffee addiction which commonly took about 3 trillion lightyears?Kongu: In English?Hahli: Like, he asked, like how ,like you got out from your, like, coffee addiction?Kongu: Real English, not "Teenage Girls Who Loves Korean Guys and Vampires Which Sparkles" English.Jaller: White man said, how you away from coffee crazy?Kongu: Nuparu?Nuparu: He meant to say was how do you got away from your coffee addiction?Kongu: Ohhh... Why don't you say so, I bought Insta-CoffeeFree from that guy.Merchant from Resident Evil 4(MRE4): Heh heh heh, thank you, stranger.Kongu: Thank you, Nuparu, you are better than the others.Jaller: D'oh!Hahli: Like, boo hoo!Matoro: i have calculated that this statement is 100% insulting.MRE4: Oh, stranger. i have something important for your mission. But I'm selling it in a high price.Matoro: I have aproximately a billion w.MRE4: Not enough cash, stranger.Hahli: Like, shopping vouchers?MRE4: I'm a merchant, not a shopper, stranger.Nuparu: My bank account have about 999,999,999,999,999...A week later..Nuparu:...999,999,999,999.99 w MRE4: Not enough cash, stranger.Jaller: I have 1000 latest Biorarries (Ferraries), 4000 Jallerginis (Lamboginis), and OVER 9000 of whatever Turaga Bean (Mr.Bean) drives.Everyone including myself and the comedy's Nikitos Nui: .....!MRE4: I said not enough cash, you stupid stranger.Jaller: :censored:MRE4: Anything ya wanna say, stranger? (Aims bazooka at Jaller's head)Jaller: http://www.bzpower.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/confusedw.gif Nothing.Kongu: Sorry but I only have leftover coffee packages with me.MRE4: Ahhh, that's perfect. Consider yourself a deal, stranger.Everyone else: http://www.bzpower.com/board/public/style_emoticons/default/confusedw.gifKongu: Alright, let's see that message.A hologram of Nikitos Nui appeared, in a hot tub, with a butler serving him pizzas.NN: Ummm, hi guys. :sigh:Kongu: Is it me, or your body looks crystal-based?NN: I'm a crystal alien. It's the effect of the bath. Now you all have to pass through this terrifying beast by yourselves, since, ya'all used up my inventions.Kongu: How big is this beast?NN: Bigger than a refrigerator but smaller than a bigger refrigerator.Jaller: Figures.NN: Good luck, agents. This message will self-destruct in 10 seconds.Kongu: NUPARU!!!Nuparu: On it!Nuparu dug the message deep into the Earth, when the message explodes, only smokes pour out from the hole that he dug.Nuparu: i guess the bomb's down to earth.Hahli: So, like ,we have to go now?Kongu: No, we have to wait for Hewkii. Only Mata Nui know how long a Pink Toa will be in a toilet.Mata Nui: I don't know.Meanwhile with me, I'm taking out my chainsaw.What's the answer???Hewkii: HHHHHHEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLPPPPTHE END.HENSHIN!! Quote Toa Nikitos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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