Woo hoo, I got it today. So far I've:
Attacked a chihauhau with a coyote
Summoned Leviathan and the Kraken to battle (Kraken won)
Given a cow Mad Cow Disease
Mind controlled Cthulhu and rode him
Killed off everyone with Death
Had Longcat defeat Rick Astley
Discovered what happens when you type in "your mom"
Battled my evil twin
Set off several nukes, although killing myself in the process
And I haven't even left the title screen yet.
It's the saddest chapter in all of the Lord of the Rings.
I mean, why does the poor Balrog have to die?
After all, out of every Lord of the Rings character, the Balrog only comes second to Nob in the complexity of his thoughts and motivations. It's a shame he got killed off just when we were getting to know him.
Yup, so I've got a tortoise who lives in my backyard. He's lived there for around 2 and a half years, but he doesn't really have a name yet, besides "The Turtle" because turtle sounds better than tortoise. So, here he is.
THEN YOU NEED X-CHROMOSOAP
SIMPLY WASH YOUR FACE ONCE A DAY
THE SOAP'S PATENTED FORMULA WILL TURN YOUR FACE INTO A BUSHY HAVEN
NOTHING WILL STAND IN YOUR WAY
IT EAT'S RAZORS ALIVE
EATS 'EM ALIVE
EVEN FIRE CAN'T STOP IT
WATCH AS WE DIP THIS BEARD IN HYDROCHLORIC ACID
THE SKIN MELTS AWAY, BUT THE BEARD STAYS ON
AND, ABSOLUTELY FREE WE'LL INCLUDE OUR MUSTACHE WAXER
COMMAND A FEARSOME MUSTACHE THAT'LL EARN YOU RAISES AT WORK
CALL NOW
There was a little boy who lived in a far away land. Close to the boy’s home, there was a tall mountain, always covered in snow at the top. Also at the top of the mountain, there was an ancient monastery where ancient monks lived.
Sometimes, the little boy, as he was riding his tricycle around his yard, would look up at the monastery on the tall mountain and wonder what it was like up there.
One day, when the wind was blowing down off the mountain, the air turned quite cold and the little
Old Tom Bombadil
Is a merry fellow
Bright blue his jacket is
And his boots are yellow!
Tom. Shut up.
-Beorc
But seriously, doesn't anyone else find Tom Bombadil incredibly irritating?
I am a heron. I have a long neck and I pick fish out of the water with my beak. If you don't repost this comment on 10 other pages I will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans.
So I finally got an iPod (apparently I'm behind on the times) and the only songs I've added so far are:
You're Not Alone from Final Fantasy IX
The theme of Golden Sun
Snowman from Super Smash Brothers Brawl
Komm, Susser Tod from End of Evangelion
Kingdom Hearts's theme
And the Love Theme from Mother 3
So yeah, I'm kind of a geek if you hadn't noticed.
Spectacular Trampoline Slaughter
Radioactive Math Fandango
Morbidly Obese Theme Park Uncensored
Stoic Pirate Tale
Heroic Chess of the Blood God
Communist Surgery Battle
Amazing Programming in the Dark
Undead Unicycle Insanity
Soviet Shopping Forever
Irresistible Motorcycle Assassins
Cthulhu's Wagon Invasion
Gandalf has about ten different great quotes all together in this chapter. Seriously.
"So now, when its master was awake once more and sending out his dark thought from Mirkwood, the Ring abandoned Gollum. Only to be picked up by the most unlikely unperson imaginable: Bilbo from the Shire! Behind that there was something else at work, beyond any design of the Ring-maker. I can put it no plainer than by saying that Bilbo was meant to find the Ring, and not by its maker. In which case you also
We swear by the lightning that destroys
By the streams of generous blood being shed
By the bright flags that wave
Flying proudly on the high mountains
That we have risen up, and whether we live or die
We are resolved that Algeria shall live
So be our witness - be our witness - be our witness!
We are soldiers in revolt for truth
And we have fought for our independence
When we spoke, none listened to us
So we have taken the noise of gunpowder as our rhythm
And the sound of machine gu
Now, this entry was originally going to have another point to it, but I forgot what that was. So good morning/whenever you're reading this, and just remember:
He's always watching.
