Taking The Initiative... Before You're Asked.
Guys, just as a heads-up, you've probably heard this from your parents before. Now, whether you've heard the simplified version or had some sort of discussion or whatever, this really is an important issue for everyone.
In our society, we're all about minimizing our workload. Don't think so? We have automatic dishwashers, clothes dryers, cars that work with a push of the pedal, and heck, we don't even have to waste effort switching CDs on our players, we just press a button and an mp3 pops up. Today's society wants you to do as little work as possible. Why? Because they want you to feel like you need to be convenienced.
Let's face it, the human race is basically lazy. I know few people who would rather move a piano than sit on the couch reading a book/watching TV/whatever. We want our lives to be as easy and care-free as possible.
Because of this effect that the media gives us, we get into this cycle in our brains. So long as there isn't any job being offered to us, it's OK to lie around doing nothing. Now, this isn't wrong... but consider these scenarios...
- You just got back home from whatever you were doing prior, and you sit down to see what's on TV. Your mom's busy working on the paperwork so that you can go on that trip with your friends. Meanwhile, the kitchen is a wreck. The dishwasher hasn't been emptied, so the sink's overflowing, the counters are a mess, and the remains of today's lunch are still left all over the stove. Your mom's already swamped, and someone's got to get that clean.
- You're bored out of your mind, so you decide to call up your friends to see if they want to get together at the park. You plow through all the junk on your floor to reach the door, and with some effort, shove it open. You see a remarkable difference as you step from your room into the hallway.
- You're logging onto BZPower and you notice that your sister's busy trying to throw the family room into shape. She has a group of friends coming over, and your younger siblings already trashed the room on one of their "space missions", and they're gone at a friend's house. You weren't involved in the mess, but all the same, your sister's hard-pressed for time, and she doesn't want her friends to think she's a total slob.
Yeah, I kinda bludgeoned you over the head with those, huh? But you'd be amazed at how obvious these situations are. Imagine watching your life as if it were a TV show. Picture yourself in the foreground playing Halo 2 while your mom's in a frenzy trying to put lunch together for your grandparents who are coming over. What would your opinions of yourself be at that point in time? Probably not too high, huh?
Now, guys, I'm not accusing you of anything. I'm not going to rant on the fact that "Oh, the children of America might as well have electric outlets in their heads" or whatever. Really, I enjoy a good TV show just as much as the next guy, and I obviously enjoy my time on the computer. And I totally love just killing time doing nothing.
But...
There is opportunity.
That's a funny word, isn't it? Opportunity. Usually when we think of that word, it has a positive connotation. That is, it makes us feel good. To assume that there is an opportunity is to assume that you have a chance at something, the likes of which probably isn't offered to some other people, giving a sort of special feeling. When we think of opportunity, we like to think of our friends asking us if we'd like to go see the concert of the year with them or the girl/guy of our dreams asking if we're available to go to the dance on Friday.
And quite often, we think of aggressive opportunity. In other words, someone shoves it towards us and says "You want some?"
But there is initiative opportunity.
That is where we see an opportunity and we seize it, without someone telling us or asking us to. That's knowing that your crush doesn't have a date to the dance, and asking them out. It's taking the initiative.
And sure, we do this on a daily basis. We see that there's a seat open next to our best bud at the lunch table, so we plop ourselves down there. We see that the band teacher's not looking and take that opportunity to toss out our chewing gum. But these initiative opportunities that we do daily all have a common theme: We're keeping ourselves completely in mind.
Why do you want to sit next to your friend? So that you'll have an enjoyable lunch. Why do you want to spit out that gum? So that the band teacher doesn't harp on you about it again. You're looking out for #1.
This, also, is not a bad thing. It is your life that you're living, and there's nothing wrong with making it an enjoyable one.
But we tend to ignore other initiative opportunities.
Let's go back to Scenario Numero Uno.
Now, even though the new episode of Monk is on, and the recliner feels nice and cozy, let's look at that kitchen. Do you really think your mom's going to have time to do a good job cleaning it up and still have time for herself afterwards? Would it be that hard to go in there and even just empty the dishwasher?
Hey, I'm not asking for anything profound. I'm not saying hire yourself out to a charity. But it's the subtle things that really count to a lot of people. Taking out the trash when you see it's full instead of waiting for your Dad to nag you about it or do it himself. Wiping down the counter when you see that the kitchen is a mess. Heck, even opening a door for someone. These all mean a little something to those who would've had to do it if you hadn't.
And guys, here's a little secret: you can cheat. That's right, you can trick yourself, and think about it and how it applies to you. I mean, if you don't help Mom with the kitchen, what's going to become of your dinner? Do you really want to ask her to write you that note for tomorrow when she's been flustered all night?
But really, I think that everyone is capable of looking beyond themselves, even for brief periods. Just thinking about other people and what could help them.
And hey, all you men out there, here's another secret: girls totally dig it. That's not to say that this should be your intention, but you'll notice it. Girls, even girls that are just your friends, will think a little more highly of you if you perhaps hold the door, help someone in line loading up their groceries on the conveyor belt, or even just asking them if they'd like you to refill their glass.
In the experience of having two sisters on the dating scene, I always hear about dates afterwards. And guys, it's not the quality of the restraunt I hear about, it's little things. Things like the guy picking up something they dropped or helping them put on their coat or even just making friendly conversation to the waiter. The guys I hear the best things about are those who take the initiative opportunity when it rules in the favor of others. Believe me, girls are perfectly capable of seeing through phony behavior, so if you're just acting to get her impressed, she'll know.
And anyway, moving off of that, it says a lot more about your character. People notice this, both important and unimportant. And can be anywhere from the stranger that glanced at you from a distance to the boss considering giving you a promotion. While it may not fully benefit you directly, it will certainly speak volumes about who you are as a person, and people will have more respect for you.
Kind of funny that stooping to help someone else gives people a higher view of you, doesn't it?
But guys, it does.
It's taking the initiative. It's doing it without being asked, without being begged, without being forced, without being threatened, without even being implied. It's being willing to do it, even when no one else is around to give you praise. That's taking the initiative.
And it's a darn good quality for any person to have.
Rantingfuliciously,
Dr. Bionicle
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