Um...just...because?

-D-

Oxymoron. Simply that.

Let me guess, this came in an email forward or something?

The answer's 44.

55555

These are unanswerable. Yet funny.

LC®

Why ask someone a question, but then tell them not to answer it?

Edit: Know what, I'm going to ask my friends these questions

76.8?

And now to completely make hash out of all of your questions. Just because I like you so much.

Can you cry under water?

Only if you're wearing a mask.

How important does a person have to be before they are considered

assassinated instead of just murdered?

If they are a member of a group that the assassin doesn't like, that qualifies.

Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'.. But it's only a 'penny for

your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?

Buying frosty chocolate milkshakes!

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were

buried in for eternity?

No, you wear a halo, wings, and a white robe, duh.

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

Because the pizza guys can't make round boxes.

What disease did cured ham actually have?

Trichonosis.

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be

a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Because the technology just wasn't around at the time.

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up

like every two hours?

Apart from that, babies are quiet and peaceful.

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

No, it's called a signing.

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

You are inside a movie studio, but on the television screen.

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in

binoculars to look at things on the ground?

So they can be above everybody else.

Why do doctors leave the room while you changing? They're going to see

you naked anyway.

Professional courtesy.

Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?

The same way 'bras' are plural and 'panty' singular.

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible

crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Because they need to cook meat somehow on that thing.

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about

him?

By saying that we don't care, we in fact do care.

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

Can dead people vote or count as living? There ya go, no.

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,

why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Because coconuts just don't patch up holes like they conduct sound.

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're

both dogs!

Goofy had his intelligence tripled and was trained in speech and human behaviour.

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME ######, why didn't

he just buy dinner?

He can't afford to get undercooked meat.

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from

vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

Dead babies.

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Well, that's phrased badly. Electricity comes from electrons moving in an atom. Morality comes from us not wanting to be morons.

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same

tune?

Yes, and I'm sure everyone here has tried it and it works.

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

'Cause I'm cool that way.

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but

call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

They're not the same thing. Asteroids are extraterrestrial masses, while hemorrhoids are intraintestinal masses.

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at

you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the

window?

He likes to catch flies, not feel the wind.

There you go. Any other brainy questions?

BToD

*Laughs out loud*

I approve this blog but do not have an actual medal.