So maybe you clicked here because it was in the list of blogs. Maybe because of the link in my signature. Whatever my mood seemed to be in that post was a mask. I'm a complete wreck. I'm going to be open here.

You might know that I lost the love of the most important person in my life. I've talked to many people. They tell me to move on, but I can't. You need to understand that she was everything I had.

My life is going downhill. I'm not doing well in school, my parents are either losing their jobs or losing their hours so we won't have as much money, my brothers are distant from me now and my friends could definitely be better. My grandparents are dying. I have a lousy job.

What else do I have to look forward to in life? Maybe I'm well-known here, but not that many people actually talk to me... and my life can't revolve around BZP.

Onto the person. Her name is Rose. Having her love me made everything else seem ok. I was more confident and had a better view of my life. Now it seems like everything is just falling down.

I need her love again. She's the only person I ever wanted and I don't want anybody else other than her. I know there must be something I can say that will make her love me again... but what?

I know BZP probably isn't the kind of place where I should be asking for help like this, but I'll keep asking whoever I can in real life. Out of those I have talked to, they're saying I'm very depressed and even *gulps* suicidal. No, I wouldn't do that. But I can't live with a broken heart. What do I do?

Please don't suggest I'm saying this purely for attention. This is the deadly serious view I have of my life. I'm just giving you guys the opportunity to maybe say some things that might make me feel better. Or whatever.

I need help.