If you've seen the news, you should know that McDonals is coming out with another line of Bionicle toys for their happy meals (a plaything to go along with your calorie killer burger and fries, so you can be like every other obese American... except with the Bionicle toy)

In 2001, they had the McToran, which everybody seems to believe is the peak of promotional perfection.

In 2006 and 2007, they had blockified figures of the main characters that everybody disregarded as garbage.

People want to see the McToran again, or something like that. But I don't think it'll happen... and here's a blog to jusify why I think this way.

First, why were the McToran so popular?

• They were prominent storyline characters. I think this is the big one here, folks. Obviously, in 01, Lego wasn't expecting Bionicle to be the smash hit it was, so they didn't plan everything out to last potentially more than a year. The focus was to buy one of the Toa sets to go along with your Matoran (and then a Rahi to go along with your Toa... and then why not just get the rest of the Toa while you're at it) The Matoran characters were then given their own special place in the Bionicle universe (heck, four of them turned Toa later on). And if that wasn't enough, the MNOLG made them incredibly popular, because it features mostly Matoran sets with a few cameos from the Toa / Turaga / Rahi. When you see a set as a main character in the games, then you will probably want to own it more than it if was some unknown figure. That was my experience with the Matoran (or, then, Tohunga).

• They were actual sets. Alot of people bring this up. You actually had to build your little Matoran, getting the full Lego experience. You had two feet, two arms, a body, a head, and a mask. And the arms had features, with the capabilities to throw discs. (In fact, they have more features than most smaller sets today, albeit far less articulation) And you could combine multiple Matoran to build larger figures, like the Matoran-Nui. A set in and of itself, although the restrictions by McDonalds made it so the parts were overly large (to prevent accidental swallowing... yes, I know you've always wanted to taste some of your LEGO Bricks, but it is a bad idea).

• They had collectible Kanohi. True, the molds were already being used to create the canister Toa's masks, as well as a multitude of different colored masks for the mask packs... but they were the only sets to have those masks in those specific colors at that time. (You know, until half of them were re release in 03) Collectibility!

• They were cuuuute! Well, maybe this isn't a big reason, but come on. How can you not resist the cuddleability of those wittle McToran, especially when compared to the Rahkshi and... gasp... those 03 Matoran forms.

Because, unfortunately in some aspects, Bionicle has changed from the wondrous place we first saw in 01. (I mean, come on, the island wasn't even supposed to be inhabited in the first place! That wouldn't have gone down well in 01)

Let's look at the biggest thing; story. The McToran were a hit because, not only did they get roles in the story, they got big roles featured in a big way in the MNOLG. Today, Bionicle has grown too complex for new characters like that. Think about it... every year, you get 12 canister characters, 6 impulse set characters, 3 or more Titan characters, and a couple of promotional set characters. And those are just the new ones... Greg also has to include various characters from previous years. When BZP clamors about wanting to see more and more of certain characters, Greg has to squeeze them in, so they only get limited time. It would just be more difficult to try and add in some McDonald's promotional characters to the official storyline.

And Greg probably doesn't even want them in.

Yeah, the medias want to focus on the sets that the viewers will purchase. So the canister characters get the most focus, impulse set characters are only there for a while, and you have some Titan and Promotional character appearances. If the viewer sees them in the story and goes out and buys they, Lego gets more money than if said viewer went and bought a Happy Meal. And even if Lego did put the promotional character into the story big time, what about the fans who can't go to a McDonalds? Then they read the story, but can't by the set, so Lego doesn't get the money they were after in the first place. (This is what happened with the McToran, at least. After a few weeks in McDonalds, they were out of the market, and then you had no chance to buy those guys from the MNOLG straight from a vendor)

Since the whole idea of the promotion isn't to introduce new characters, but to "promote" kids to go out and buy the bigger characters, Lego has gone in the direction where the promotions are miniatures of the canister sets. Since you already have the same sets with an actual constructive build, they don't put an effort into making the promotion figures buildable, but just make them vaguely resemble the sets Lego really wants you to buy.

And if they did make it buildable... let's look at the McToran again. Besides the mask, what piece is ever widely used in MOCing? Best place I've seen any used as on the back of the Boxer (a McToran arm... actually one of Lego's more unique designs) The McToran weren't for the MOCist (except for the mask, but I'll get to that later) The parts have to be large enough that it won't be a threat to younger children, and they have to be cheap enough to produce in bulk for Happy Meals. So you thought the Avi-Matoran build was basic... now dumb that down about 10 times and you'd probably have something acceptable by Lego and McDonalds... and the average BZPer will still go "ew."

And masks... glorious collectible masks in different colors... Hate to break it to you, but Lego moved away from that track in 2004. Collectibles don't sell well. So as much as I miss the old Kanohi boxes, we have to expect that all Kanohi nowadays will only go with specific figures that you can purchase. So I don't see Lego going in that direction. Besides, the masks today are bigger, bulkier, and contain those plus rods to hold them in. I'm sure McDonalds could just include random masks in their Happy Meals... but what kind of little kid wants to place with a body-less "face?" Now you've made the whole McDonals "small toy to play with" into a "collectible thing that requires extra content to make interesting."

So what can you expect from McDonalds this year? Large figures (that can't be swallowed) that represent characters of this year (who's sets you can go buy later) with a small function for you to play with. For older fans, yes, they will suck. I got Reidak and Kalmah in 2006 and 2007... both were horrible chunks of plastic with pathetic functions compared to their sets. (Well, for the record, Reidak's saw did spin on the figure... that was okay) But I remember seeing a little kid at one of the stores I went to having a blast with his new "Bionicles." That's what Lego's aiming for nowadays. And this is my reasoning why they wouldn't go back to something like the McToran.

So stop complaining already!