Hello, Everyone. This is THE OMNISCIENT VOICE speaking. As you know, I have recently finished the last of my Bionicle Movie Trilogy. This is a bleak moment in the history of my comedies. To the casual observer, it my seem as if I had finally run out of ideas. Any with gas prices what they are today, I may never be able to afford to refill my mental gas tank.

Reader 2: You mean, we’re out of a job!

Reader 1: I thought you were just kidding!

Reader 3: Oh, woe is me!

No! I have much more to offer!

Readers: (Sigh of relief)

Reader 1: Don’t scare us like that!

In fact, I am currently working on two- yes TWO, works of fiction!

Readers: Wow.

The first is a comedy I am working on, “The Mata Nui Online Download”!

Reader 3: What is that about? Downloading MNOLG?

Reader 1: What kind of story is THAT!

No! It is a parody of the Mata Nui Online Game!

Readers: Oh!

Reader 2: Of course!

And the second thing I am writing is: an epic!

Readers:

Reader 1: NO!

Reader 3: Don’t do it!

Reader 2: You know, I was in the epic forum once.

Reader 1: YOU?

Reader 3: What happened? What was it like?

FLASHBACK!

Reader 2: Hello? Hello? Has anyone seen the remote? Where am I? (Reader 2 looks around) I haven’t seen these topics before. “Gate of Destiny”? “Tangled Web”? Hey! This is the epic forum!

BZP Member 1: Good day to thee. How was thy visit hither?

Reader 2: Ack! People speaking Old English!

BZP Member 1: Actually, Old English is Anglo-Saxon. What I was speaking is a very bad impression of Early Modern English.

Reader 2: Ah! English lessons! Run for the hills!

(Reader 2 jumps into a random topic)

BZP member 1: What did I say?

Reader 2: Phew! I’m safe! Now what topic am I (gasp) No! This is not possible!

 

Reader 2 stares unbelievingly at the topic title, which says in bold letters: The Chronicles of Hara Nui!

 

Reader 2: This guy stole TOV’s island! I’ll show him! (Reader 2 pulls out a marker and draws a mustache over the avatar of Hrash0. Suddenly, Hrash0 comes online, and his avatar stirs awake)

Hrash0: Hey! What do you think you’re doing!

Reader 2: You stole THE OMNISCIENT VOICE’s island!

Hrash0: I did nothing of the sort! I never even heard of this voice until you came in!

(Hrash0 throws Reader 2 onto the streets of the epic forum)

Reader 2:

BZP Member 2: Hey! What are you doing here, comedy scum!

Reader 2: Huh? What?

BZP Member 3: Let’s get him!

(BZP Members chase Reader 2 with torches and pitchforks)

Reader 2: AH! MOMMY!

END FLASHBACK!

Reader 2: Let’s just say I’m rather infamous over there.

Reader 1: See! That’s why you shouldn’t hang around THOSE people! Their way too serious!

Too late! I’ve already started! “Tale of the Two Stones of Hara”

Reader 3: Hara? You mean you island?

Reader 1: You’re retelling the same story?

Not exactly. It will be very different from the original. It will be more serious, and will be without Harry Potter and-

Reader 1: NO! I liked Harry! Don’t tell me you’re going to kill him off!

Oh, shut up! Speaking of which, my Epic will not have you in it.

Reader 2: WHAT?!

Sorry. You’re too funny for an epic.

Reader 3: Alas! Our funny ways have caught up with us!

Reader 1: hey! Stop the drama! What do you think this is? The Epics forum?

So keep a look out for these two stories, which will be posted on the forums as soon as I’m done with them.

Reader 2: That sounds encouraging.

An Update: I have some bad news. I have somehow lost the two chapters I have wrote for The Mata Nui Offline Download, and I must rewrite them. Hopefull, I can make up for those chapters. We can rebuild them. We have the technology...