I'd ask him when the next chapter of BZMS is coming out.

Seriously? Hmmm, I'm thinking pepper spray.

Ahh.... Probably start laughing and shut the door and call the mental facility.

Nice question. Really had to think.

-ToC

I'd ask you why you have mayonnaise and how you found where I live.

I'd welcome him in to eat roasted mangoes and watch (ex-)President Bush's speeches backwards with green sunglasses on. We might even throw some kittens at the neighbor's chimney from our roof.

Then I'd go "Wreeglemarf" and backflip away from the doorway to let him in.

And we'd chill. B)