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First Hamster Census Taken

Arpy

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First Hamster Census taken

By Hurling Frootmig, Editor-in-chief

 

The results of the first-ever hamster census were released Tuesday by researchers at the University of Maximegalon's MISPWOSO. The census was conducted over the last two months, involving over 15,000 hamsters and revealing absolutely nothing that wasn't known, except for the fact that every hamster has 0.9 littermates and a carrot, as evidenced by the following diagram:

IPB Image

Photo courtesy of Mark Sandlin
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"The ramifications of this are astounding," said a Maximegalon professor. "The carrot alone could keep our scientists occupied for decades, centuries even!" MISPWOSO promised further information as it was processed.

 

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