blogs_blog_1200

My sisters and I watched the movies as part of a "Bad Movie Marathon". For a while, I have been considering writing a review of this marathon, but couldn't will myself to revisit the horror, the pain, the torture, and the plain old stupidity of these films.

 

The directing was horrible, the acting lamentable, the plot holes irreparable, the cinematography laughable, the editing all too noticeable, the story detestable, the special effects questionable, the pacing unreliable, the set designs unapproachable, the lighting deplorable, the music forgettable, the original concepts questionable, the general character depictions unspeakable, the characters' relatability intangible, the protagonist unforgiveable, the love interest not recommendable, the meaningless romance predictable, the Mary Sue powers too conveniently infallible, the narrative regrettable, the narrating unbearable, the story indigestible, and the movie's overall ambitions incompatible with what it really was, which was a monstrosity whose stupidity was undeniable. The only good thing about those movies was Bella's father, who we thought was actually likeable. Otherwise, if we wanted to watch a movie with disturbing romantic implications, we would have watched one with Hannibal, who was at least a cannibal and was far better at reminding the main protagonist and the audience that she was edible. The only mistake we made in this whole marathon was watching Eragon first, which by comparison made the Twilight movies watchable.

 

24601