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Author's Notes & Things: Did I make an account just to start posting stories on here? Yes, I think I did. Did I choose a meme character with absolutely no story to focus a story around, just because I found out a few suggested possible themes that could be explored with him? Yes. I rather think I did that too. Here's this silly thing. Good Guy, by Toa Sozonis. Enjoy. ********* I'm a good guy, or so they say. They bring me out on stage and I see the ones who look like me, but they're complete where I am not, and they point to me and still wish to become like me. I'm missing my hands and I have no face, where they have all of those things and more. I've never known what it's like to throw a kanoka disk or play kohli, and I might never know those things, and yet they choose me to represent them — and all they could be, and all they might want to be. ******** I am a warrior in a shadow play of ancient history. I am their symbol of the way they fight against the shadows and their own darkness, and the darkness they believe might haunt the universe. What am I to know of such things? My life has been spent in the closets and luggage of their stageshow productions, a nothing beyond nothing; although they use me to portray tales of the lands far away, I have never been to those lands and will never be to those lands. Why am I the one they trust? Why am I the one who portrays their good guy? What if I'm the one they shouldn't believe in at all? ******** I have no flesh, so I cannot be corrupted. I cannot be real, I cannot feel. I'm not like them. Where they have organic material in between the shifting mechanical parts, I am entirely mechanical, and yet entirely manual. I have gears, but no engines; wires, but no strings. I am all they could be, and all they might want to, but I cannot move and I cannot speak. Would I if I could? What would I say? If your life is a stageshow and your body not real, why bother to say anything at all, even if you knew your voice would work in order to say it? ******** They don't play their stageshows as much anymore. The city has been crumbling, or so they say, and the Vahki are gone and now all the world is their stage — a stage for their drama, a stage for their lives, their futures, their destinies, and what of their good guy? I am in the closet of the stage where they left me, and I am silent, and I cannot move. I have no strings, but I am their good guy. I have no hands, and I cannot knock. I'm a good guy, or so they say. And now, with the ones who choose me gone, I have been left behind — I am alone — I am forgotten — and all the world's a stage, and the stage is crumbling, and I will never know their eyes upon my silent body again.
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- first person
- prose
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So, what's the last book you read? I just recently finished Jonathan Lethem's Gun, With Occasional Music. A great blend of detective and dystopian fiction.
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KONGU AND KEETONGU Episode 1 by Aerixx One morning, Kongu woke up to the sight of a red light shining in his eyes. The red light said, “Hello.” Kongu, like any decent Matoran, started screaming and trying to bat it away. Needless to say, he failed epically. The red light remained unmoving until Kongu finally exhausted all of his energy. When Kongu resigned himself to the fact that he was about to be eaten by a laser-pointer, the light leaned back and revealed itself to be... (cue Mortal Kombat “fatality” voice) Keetongu. Kongu started screaming again, then shut up. Then he said: “You want cookies? I have-own cookies... maybe... or something...” Keetongu didn’t understand anything. So, like any decent buff ninja cyclops thing, he asked, “Do you speak Matoran?” Kongu replied, “Yes, I do.” Keetongu, uncomprehending, repeated, “Do you speak Matoran?” Kongu, slightly very confused, answered again, “Yes. I speak Matoran.” “Do you speak Matoran?” “YES! Dude, I AM a Matoran!” Keetongu, even more confused, asked, “You are Matoran? This not Soviet Xia joke where ‘Matoran speak you’, this real?” Kongu facepalmed. “There are two kinds-types of Matoran: Us, and our language.” “You are Langwajj? Hello, Langwajj.” Kongu got up, looked at Keetongu, and said, “Let’s go eat-consume some cookies. Then maybe-possibly your mind’ll clear up.” Keetongu, still not understanding, stood from his crouching position and attempted to follow Kongu out of the hut’s small bedroom, but tripped on a random friction connector pin, tripped, and brought the ceiling crashing down on himself. Bamboo and curved slope parts came raining down and, as Keetongu tried to get up, a random Kanohi Kualsi fell onto his face (or whatever you call it). Kongu, only slightly disappointed by the destruction of his bedroom, grinned under his Miru and reached for the Kanohi, saying “Oh, hey, you found-discovered it! Thanks!” But before he could grasp it, Keetongu disappeared. He heard a surprised “Uh?” a few feet away, and when he turned, Keetongu was just vanishing again. “Wait-stop!” He called, but all he got in reply were random “Ooh!”s and “Wee!”s as Keetongu teleported around the hut in rapid succession. Kongu was at a loss of what to do. So he decided a tactic that always worked (at least on Po-Matoran): food. He held up a cookie and screamed, “Cookie!” Keetongu immediately appeared in front of him, grabbed the cookie, and vanished again. Now all Kongu heard were the sounds of the cookie being smashed against the faceplate of the mask as Keetongu tried to eat it somewhere on the roof of the kitchen. Kongu then called out, “Come over here and I’ll make you able to eat it!” Keetongu plopped down on the rubble by Kongu and looked at him expectantly. And creepily. Because his one eye-stalk was twisted through one of the eyeholes of the mask, so it appeared as if a Ko-Matoran had asked an amateur mask-maker to add an eye-piece to his Kualsi. Ugh. Kongu promptly popped the mask off Keetongu’s face (or whatever you call it). Keetongu promptly stuffed the cookie where his mouth would’ve been. But, since the characters in this story retelling go by their toy forms, not their movie forms, and Keetongu lacks a mouth in toy form, the cookie crumbs ended up clogging his Rhotuka-launching mechanism and causing it shoot a spinner which, in turn, smashed into Kongu and sent him flying through whatever was left of the walls to the house, leaving a suspiciously Matoran-shaped hole. Keetongu sighed and went to look for Kongu. Not long after, he found him head-first in a thornbush. He reached out with a massive hand to pull Kongu out, but the thorn bush squirmed and said, “No. My tasty.” Keetongu blinked his one eye in surprise and reached forward again. This time the bush growled, “My tasty. Go get your own.” Keetongu sat down in amazement. Was this a kind of Rahi? Or maybe a Makuta experiment, like the sentient mountain? In any case, he had to probe it for more details. “Who you?” He asked. “A bush.” “Why you want to eat Langwajj?” “I eat tasty because he is tasty. Go get your own.” “You want more tasty tasty? “I can has tasty more tasty than this tasty?” “Yes.” “Okay. Bring me tasty!” The bush snarled, and so Keetongu set off to find a Matoran for the bush to eat. After a while, he almost stepped on a little brown Po-Matoran. “Ow! Watch it, dude! I’ll have you killed! Teridax, this fat cyclops is bullying me! Waaaaaaaah!” Ahkmou whined. Keetongu calmly picked him up by the double-bevelled gear on his back and carried him all the way back to Le-Koro. “Hey bush! I have tasty for you!” Keetongu bellowed. All he heard in reply was “Taaaa... sssstttyyy...” and then a muffled gasp. Ahkmou started to snicker, but his laugh turned into a scream as Keetongu chucked him at the bush, knocking Kongu out of its maw and producing countless “ouch”s and “eek”s, followed by one final "Waaah!" Keetongu picked Kongu up and dusted him off. “Hello, Langwajj. More cookies?” ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- So, this was chapter one of my first comedy. Did you like it? Should I keep going? Comments are appreciated, and critiques are welcome!
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So lately I've started watching the new sci-fi show, "Terra Nova," and I've been really impressed so far. Sure, there have only been four episodes so far (and new ones come out every other week), but what I've seen has been awesome. And then earlier today it occurred to me that the basic premise behind the show would be pretty easy/fun to make into a BIONICLE spoof, and since actual episodes come out so sporadically anyway, it would be easy enough to keep updated, similar to Pohatu Puppet Pals. I'm not sure yet if I will actually write this comedy or possibly wait a little while, but here's my general idea and concept I've started considering. "Terra Nova" is a show about humans in the future discovering a time portal to the Cretaceous period, and sending people through it to start a new colony on the other side in a more primitive, less industrialized setting. So, my idea is, what if an accident involving Vezon and his Olmak caused a dimensional/temporal rift to appear, letting Spherus Magna inhabitants go through and end up back on the island of Mata Nui pre-cleansing? They could then start a colony including Glatorian/Agori as well as the MU inhabitants we've come to know and love, and have hilarious adventures with Rahi and other craziness as a vaguely defined spoof of the show's episodes. Since the show isn't already a comedy, it would be easier to spoof than if it was already funny to begin with. I also would write the comedy in such a way that it would make sense and be funny even to those who haven't seen the show, since it's relatively new and not all that well-known yet. But we'll see. The comedy will tentatively be titled "Mata Nova." First, I've got to get through my midterm week... Thoughts? Lewa0111 Nuva
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