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Citizen one: You killed Caesar! How could you? Brutus: I loved Caesar, but I love Rome more. Caesar was ambitious, he had to be stopped. Citizen three: Of course, Why didn't we think of that? Let us cheer for Brutus' killing of Caesar the way we cheered for Caesar's killing of Pompey! Antony: No, Caesar was generous, but Brutus is an honorable man. Citizen one: Antony spoke last, let's listen to him! Citizen two: O, Brutus and Antony, feed us more lies! Citizen four: We're impressionable! We'll believe anything! ...
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All of you may be enjoying Valentine's day, but I'm not! This morning, my imaginary girlfriend dumped me for my imaginary best friend! How horrible is that? Just Kidding, Happy Valentine's Day!
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I'm sick of all those "inspired by a true story" movies. I seriously doubt that half of them have a legitimate basis in truth. Someday I think I'll write a fantasy movie and say "inspired by a true story." What's the true story? That I was sick of movies that say "IBATS," when they probably aren't.
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Why did Abraham start gambling? (click spoiler tag) » Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «For fun and prophet! What do you call a sad fruit? » Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «A melon-choly What do you call a sad dog? » Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «A melan-collie What do you call a sad vegetable? » Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «A melan-cauliflower! Ha Ha Ha!
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