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Showing results for tags 'Pointers from Tahu'.
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CHARACTER POST Some Pointers from TahuiBrow Comedy ProductionsSomeplace, Sometime:Tahu: Alright men, listen up! Today I’m going to teach you all how to be heroes! And now those dorky Hero Factory heroes, I mean REAL HEROES!!Furno: Hey, that isn’t nice. We’re cool.Makuta: You are not. Hero Factory is dumb. Like Icarax over there.Icarax: ...Makuta: See? He’s so dumb, he’s speechless!Icarax: ...Furno: ... he’s dead.Makuta: ... oh. My bad.Tahu: SHUT UP! I DON’T WANT ANY MORE TALKING, YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!Makuta: Whatever, bro. You and me, we’re tight. You ain’t gonna do nothin’ to me.Tahu: YOU WANNA BET, PUNK?!!?!Makuta: My ears hurt.Furno: See, if you were a Hero Factory hero, you could put him on mute.Tahu: ...Furno: I think that might’ve been a bad idea. Yo Surge, get over here!Surge: No way buddy.Furno: I’ll let you use my jetpack.Surge: Alright, I’m coming. Now, what did you- OH MY GOD!The unfortunate Surge then found himself impaled by Tahu’s sword, which had been meant for Furno.Tahu: SEE? THAT’S WHAT A REAL HERO DOES! SACRFICES HIMSELF FOR THE STUPID!!!Surge: I don’t... wanna be a hero anymore....Tahu: NONSENSE! EVEN MAKUTA WANTS TO BE A HERO!Makuta: Yeah! Wait a minute, was that an insult? It was an insult, wasn’t it?Surge: I feel sort of sick.Tahu: NONSENSE! YOU’LL FEEL BETTER IN A MINUTE, ONCE YOUR PRIDE CATCHES UP! WHAT DOES FURNO HAVE TO SAY?Furno: *snicker* Glad it wasn’t me. *snicker*Tahu: YOU WILL SHOW RESPECT TO THE GUY WHO SACRIFICED HIS LIFE FOR YOU!Surge: I’m gonna die?Makuta: SUCKER!!!Tahu: Ahem.Makuta: Oh right, my bad. You’re the only one allowed to use capital letters. Sorry.Surge: I feel cold.Tahu: NONSENSE! YOU’LL FEEL WARMER IN A MINUTE!Surge: Everything... going black....Tahu: Nonsense! No dude, I’m serious, if you die, I’m giving you an “f” on this course.Furno: Surge, you gonna be okay? Don’t die!Surge: ...Furno...?Furno: Yeah?Surge: I just... wanted you to know... I always hated you the most.Furno: ...we’ve known each other for like ten minutes.Surge: I know.Furno: Oh just die. And get off my desk. *Shoves*Surge: I hate you. Bleagh.Tahu: FURNO! TO THE OFFICE! NOW!Furno: Fine... better than this class, at any rate.Makuta: Zing!Tahu: ...Makuta: Uh, I mean, bad Furno! How rude! You’re dumb!Breez: He is not!Makuta: Oh be quiet, girlfriend.Breez: I’m not your friend!Nex: Yeah, she’s my friend!Breez: I hate you both.Nex: Oh... I feel depressed.Makuta: You better. Hero Factory sucks.Breez: Oh please don’t start that again.Makuta: Just for you Breez, because you said please, I’ll continue. Hero Factory sucks!Nex: That’s it.Nex leapt at Makuta, only to be slammed to the floor by Tahu’s foot.Nex: Ow....Tahu: THAT SHOULD TEACH YOU A LESSON, WELP!Makuta: Yeah! Bionicle 2, Hero Factory 0!Tahu: MAKUTA! STAND UP!Makuta did so, towering three times Tahu’s height.Makuta: You asked for me?Tahu: I ORDER YOU TO GIVE ME TEN PUSH-UPS, AND THEN I WANT YOU TO GO OVER TO THAT BURNING SKYSCRAPER AND SAVE THE INNOCENT MATORAN INSIDE!!!Makuta: That seems to be asking quite a lot of me.Tahu: ...Makuta: I don’t think I’m going to go.Tahu: ...Makuta: Actually, I just had a brilliant idea. Imma go listen to what you told me to do. Be back in ten minutes.Tahu: THE PUSH-UPS FIRST!Makuta: Fine. One, two, three, four... five... six... *groan* seven... oh god... eight... hernia... nine... limbs turning to jelly... must... resist urge... to give up... think... pie... ten! Phew, that was hard. Alright, I’m off! See you all in ten!Nex: ...Breez: Weak as a duck.Bulk: Aw man, I can only do six push-ups.Tahu: BULK! I ORDER YOU TO GO TO THE BACK CORNER AND TRAIN IN YOUR ART OF PUSH-UPS!!!! I WANT YOU ABLE TO DO EIGHT HUNDRED BY THIS EVENING!Bulk: You’re kidding, right?Tahu: Do I look like I’m kidding?Bulk: ... no.Tahu: Well then.Bulk: I’ll go start training.Tahu: You do that son, you do that.Breez: I find you to be an extremely cruel and outrageous teacher.Sidorak: I actually find him to be quite interesting.Nex: You’re a nerd.Sidorak: I know... I hate my life.Tahu: NOW THEN! RULE #34 OF BEING A HERO IS... BE COOL!Sidorak: I’ll leave then.Nex: Wicked! I am like, so cool! Not as cool as Breez though.Breez: Giggle.Tahu: ...Makuta: PANT! COUGH! GASP! I’M BACK! PANT PANT! COUGH! ARGH!Tahu: ...Makuta: GOSH DARN IT, I’M USING ALL CAPITAL LETTERS AGAIN! GASP!Tahu: I’m going to count to three.Makuta: I’m gonna die at four.Tahu: ...Makuta: No I’m serious, I think I’m having a heart attack.Tahu: ...Makuta: Ah. All better. Alright then.Makuta took his seat, kicking a cowering Sidorak out the window, much to the disapproval of Tahu, who made this disapproval known.Tahu: A HERO IS NOT SUPPOSED TO KICK PEOPLE OUT OF A FIFTIETH FLOOR WINDOW!!!Makuta: We’re on the 50th floor? Crud! @@@@@@!Nex: What kinda of a curse is that?Makuta: It isn’t one.Nex: Oh. Wow, only Breez could’ve fooled me better than that.Breez: ...giggle?Nex: Score 2 for Nex!!Tahu: NOW! WHO KNOWS WHAT SUN TZU DID?Breez: Uh, no. Who the heck is that guy?Nex: I’m with Breez on this one.Tahu: HE USED HIS MONEY TO BUY TWO OF EVERY ANIMAL ON EARTH, AND THEN HE HERDED THEM ONTO A BOAT, AND THEN HE BEAT THE socks OUT OF EVERY SINGLE ONE.Nex: I’m sorry, but what relevance does that have for being a hero?Tahu: That’s what you should do to the villains. Herp derp.Breez: Animals don’t have socks.Tahu: THEY DO NOW!Nex: I think you’re stretching reality just a little too much.Tahu: I DON’T CARE!Makuta: Wicked! Only thirty seconds of class left!Tahu: ...Makuta: I mean... oh darn! Only thirty seconds of class left!Nex: Hey Breez, I saw you eyeing that diamond the other day. I could buy it for you.Breez: You’re pretty desperate, aren’t you?Nex: ... maybe.Breez: So... thanks?Nex: Yeah. You’re welcome.Tahu: ALRIGHT CLASS, TODAY’S CLASS IS OVER! I EXPECT YOU ALL BACK TOMORROW WITH FIFTY REASONS WHY KILLING SOMEONE IS BAD! CLASS DISMISSED!Makuta: Man, I hate these homework assignments. It’s so much easier to just remove people from existence.Tahu: HEROES NEVER TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT! THE EASY WAY OUT IS FOR WIMPS!The End.Thoughts?-ibrow