tent163phantoka Posted February 5, 2012 Share Posted February 5, 2012 (edited) (Star Trek intro music playing)COMIC MAKING.THE 2ND-TO-FINAL BZPHRONTIER.THESE ARE THE VOYAGES OF THE ARTWORK III: BIONICLE COMICS FORUM.TO DISCOVER NEW GENRES.TO EXPLORE SAID GENRES.TO BRAVELY GO WERE NO FORUM HAS GONE BEFORE.(Star Trek intro music stops playing)With that Star Trek reference out of the way,we can get on with this. This is a playbook-style series on entrtaining ways to make teachers cringe in both positive and negative ways, while still BEING FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. Attempting any plays designed to make teachers cringe negatively IS NOT RECCOMENDED.Comix.1:intro/disclaimerPlease post!Or PM me ideas for plays! you will be credited if your ideas are used! Edited February 5, 2012 by tent163phantoka My Library! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waffles Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 You made this in MSPaint didn't you?Oh and please don't do the Star Trek thing. It looks noobish and ridiculous.There's lots of typos, the text sizes and styles are irregular, and the red on brown background burns my retinas.I guess you can't judge much based on an introductory comic.Also, how is this relevant to LEGO or BIONICLE? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tent163phantoka Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 You made this in MSPaint didn't you?Oh and please don't do the Star Trek thing. It looks noobish and ridiculous.There's lots of typos, the text sizes and styles are irregular, and the red on brown background burns my retinas.I guess you can't judge much based on an introductory comic.Also, how is this relevant to LEGO or BIONICLE?I did make it in MS paint and a little bit of GIMP. What's so bad about that? I have a PC. And I admit that the colour choice and the continuity of the text sizes are both off, but desks are brown usually, and most teachers grade in red ink. Also, the Star Trek thing is just my opener. Plus, I'm not good at spelling. What's so bad about misspelling. I worked hard on this. My Library! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Absorba- Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 (edited) 1. How hard you worked on this, honestly, is a bit irrelevant to the quality of the final product.2. If you have trouble spelling, can't you just copy it to Microsoft Word and spellcheck it?3. If this is meant to make "teachers cringe," then let me ask, WHY ARE YOU SUGGESTING WE DO THE POSITIVE ONES? That'll still make them "cringe," and let's face it, I don't think it's possible to make that reaction in a positive way.4. The play system.... really.... I don't get. The last row, I have no idea what that was about. Could you possibly explain better?5. A minor nitpick, but your text size is pretty inconsistent. Sorry.6. If you were using GIMP, it really doesn't show. What exactly did you use it for? Judging by all the content in the comic, I think it'd have to be select areas in the text. If that was the case, why didn't you just do all of it in GIMP, as opposed to the different sizes of GIMP and Paint?7. Please, please don't use a bleep sound like in the first panel. I commonly censor it in my comics as part of a joke, but here, it comes off more as you deliberately trying to sound mature, making you look more like a child, and generally rude.8. Please don't use intros like that. Seriously, Dark709, lavaside rahi, Gavla, do any near-professional-level comic topics have ANYTHING LIKE THAT? No. I know it seems nice at first, but it comes off more noobish, as it seems you're putting more dedication into a few lines of someone else's work on the topic than the actual comic itself.9. By far, the most important thing I need to identify:What does this have to do with Bionicle for that matter?Just because you put a bohrok with a poorly slapped-on Hau Nuva on it DOESN'T MAKE IT COUNT AS A BIONICLE COMIC. Bionicle or Bionicle characters have to be the focus! You can't just put a "production notice" with a Bionicle charcter on it to make it a Bionicle comic. Edited February 6, 2012 by -Absorba- Have a good question? Yes? Good answer. Click here now to ask it to me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Windrider- Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 I have gotten one report about this topic already. Please do confirm that Bionicle or LEGO characters will be the focus of the comic, filling the roles of teacher and students.I have not moved this topic because it is impossible for me to deduce the focus from the introductory comic, as it does not introduce any characters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reznas Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 I think that Absorba's post best explains what you need to work on. But I must say that I'm not really getting the point of this series. You said you worked really hard on this, yet the quality isn't that good. Another thing I would like to point out is that you should add backgrounds and characters behind the text rather than a completely black background. I don't see how this took you a lot of work, because I could easily do this in 20-30 minutes, not to be rude or anything. These need a lot of work, but I can see that your trying. Just follow the advice that everyone's given you and you'll go far. Keep up the good work!-Rez Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kodrak Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 10 minutes, tops.But let's see your second comic, which will actually be the actual comic, and then we can properly deduce the faults and cracks in this series. not autistic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Windrider- Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 Topic closed as requested. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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