Recently, I wrote up a post, and some people were hurt by it. I do not mean to excuse myself by writing this. There is no excuse for what I did. Rather, I would like to explain precisely, calmly, and without shouting (bold is for emphasis, since this one is sadly long) - why I wrote that post, what I meant by it, and try, if possible, to heal up some of the pain that I have unfortunately caused.
The Post --> What I Meant it to Say
This is what I think on this subject:
1) People can and will believe whatever lies they want to. This applies to both sides of this debate.
2) BZPower is not responsible for correcting the lies people believe, and well it shouldn't - this is a website to discuss Bionicle, not this.
3) Insulting people because of the lies they happen to believe is wrong.
Wanting something to happen is not wrong, either, but claiming that something is "right" just because you want it, and thereby shoving your preference down everyone else's throat is not. (IMO.)
Both Christians and trans/LGBTQ/whatever people should be able to like and discuss Bionicle. Neither group has the right to insult each other (as per the rules).
Finally, the administration owns yonder website, you don't. If you disagree with site policy, there are plenty of other places to discuss Bionicle/Lego that don't have these rules.
And I'm not sure why Bionicle coming back has anything to do with this, other than we're going to have a bunch of kids running around here again. Fortunately or not, kids are going to encounter people of divergent preferences as they grow up, and BZPower isn't going to stop that influence from happening like a stick in the middle of a snowstorm. We're not these kids' parents, and we're not technically responsible for teaching them the truth. Obviously I'm going to say what I think is true, but ultimately people have to make their own choices regarding whether to accept what I say as fact, and that does go for everyone.
That's post 7700066, which has unfortunately come to my attention that has caused other people pain and suffering. It was not clearly worded.
1) People can and will believe whatever lies they want to. This applies to both sides of this debate.
This was directed, unclearly, at a person posting above me who was being disrespectful of people's identifications, sexual preferences, and their privilege to talk about such things on yonder forum.
The person in this case, as indicated by Black Six, was believing lies contributing to his disrespectful attitude. These are the "lies" referred to here. Unfortunately, he can and will believe those lies no matter what sane people say. Hence the reference to both sides.
2) BZPower is not responsible for correcting the lies people believe, and well it shouldn't - this is a website to discuss Bionicle, not this.
Again, lies refers to what that person said, not to people's sexual identifications, preferences, what have you.
(I prefer the word preference, I understand you prefer the term identity. I believe that sexual preferences, like all other strong preferences, are a part of a person's identity. As I am in the wrong, I will use your wording for now, and explain below.)
3) Insulting people because of the lies they happen to believe is wrong.
There were insulting comments directed at that person for what he said. These people were right, but their insults and insulting tone were not, in my opinion, helping the situation.
Wanting something to happen is not wrong, either, but claiming that something is "right" just because you want it, and thereby shoving your preference down everyone else's throat is not. (IMO.)
Nobody took issue with this, but that's the reason why I wrote the preceding three items.
Both Christians and trans/LGBTQ/whatever people should be able to like and discuss Bionicle. Neither group has the right to insult each other (as per the rules).
Finally, the administration owns yonder website, you don't. If you disagree with site policy, there are plenty of other places to discuss Bionicle/Lego that don't have these rules.
Again, this was directed at that jerk. I thought it was clear from this context that the entire post, point #3 excepted, was directed at the person that was insulting us. I was wrong about this.
I understand that a lot of people got mad at this paragraph:
And I'm not sure why Bionicle coming back has anything to do with this, other than we're going to have a bunch of kids running around here again.
This was part of an admonition to get back on topic. We had gotten off topic in the thread, and I was the topic starter.
Fortunately or not, kids are going to encounter people of divergent preferences as they grow up, and BZPower isn't going to stop that influence from happening like a stick in the middle of a snowstorm.
The word divergent is a poor choice of words. The word different would probably be better, and less offensive. I did not know that this word was offensive to people.
And this is a true statement. There is a LGTBQ+ influence of tolerance in society and the internet at large. Whether BZP tolerates it or not is unlikely to affect children in any major way. Also, people who as LGTBQ+ like Bionicle, and saying that they aren't allowed to like and discuss Bionicle is wrong.
We're not these kids' parents, and we're not technically responsible for teaching them the truth. Obviously I'm going to say what I think is true, but ultimately people have to make their own choices regarding whether to accept what I say as fact, and that does go for everyone.
This was directed at everyone. Whatever you believe the truth on this subject is, people have to make a choice on what to accept, and the truth or lies they believe is not something you can change (much).
Why the post says what it does (this is NOT a justification, but rather an explanation)
For the record, I come from an incredibly bigoted and intolerant background. This does not excuse my actions one iota. I wanted to keep that post as far away from my personal life and background as possible, in an effort to provide an objective voice.
In doing so, I see that not only that I have failed in that endeavor, but I have failed to communicate clearly.
Welp, welcome to my blog. I can talk about my background a little, which frankly treats LGTBQ+ people with a measure of contempt. My parents drilled homophobia (or just plain homo-disgust) into my brain, citing my religion as a source.
However, my religion does not truly teach homophobia or intolerance. It's actually an ugly lie that certain people in my religion believe. Believing that your religion is true and correct does not mean that hatred of people who believe (or have identities) differently than you is true and correct. In fact my religion teaches that we are supposed to love people. Even those people who do evil, terrible things. Obviously we're supposed to do so in a way that makes sense - we don't hang out with people who like murdering people, for example, since that would be insane. But we have gone into prisons to talk to people.
Having a sexual preference (or identity) different from the rest of us is not a lie. It is not evil. Preferences and identities are not evil. It's what you do with them that can be evil. For example, I like weaponry. When I looked at the new 2015 Toa, one of the first things I noticed was the weapons they possessed, how they looked and stuff, and I thought "cool". I like pickaxes and sledgehammers - have used them to dig holes and smash old rotted logs on my families' property. This preference, right now sitting in here, does no harm to me or anyone else. But if I took a weapon and killed someone, that would be wrong. If I wanted to kill someone with a weapon, that would be wrong too, and could cause other problems, mostly having to do with lies I was believing about myself and that person. But that would be a different thing than just liking weapons.
Same deal here - people around me fear sexual abuse from LGTBQ+ people. Different than having a sexual preference, and the fear is irrational to some extent. I had a lesbian friend in high school of a different religion than me. I went to her house to watch her play video games and eat dinner with her parents. Nothing bad happened.
The other influence I have is growing up in public school. Public school treats everyone badly. But that's the thing. I was in a classroom daily with Wiccans, Christians, Unitarian Universalists, Jehovah's Witnesses, Jews and just about everyone else. I got to talk with a lot of differing viewpoints like that, and I got to like it. And I learned very quickly that no matter what people believe, you can talk to them. No matter what people believe, you treat people with respect. My parents and my background don't treat people with respect.
Those words, all mixed up in that post, are my parent's words, intended to convey a public-school meaning. I am ashamed that part of my parent's legacy still lives on in me. My parents don't ever understand people. They never bothered to try, and they passed that ugly legacy on to me. I want to try.
So when I got to BZPower, I stayed (perhaps wisely) for the most part out of the LGTBQ+ debates on here. I believed, despite all that I wrote above, that being LGTBQ+ is disgusting and wrong. But over time I saw all the lies flying around and all the hurt people, and I concluded that the truth was not in the debate. Yes, the truth does hurt sometimes. But the way that the objectors were treating this was with tactless thoughtlessness, and they were wrong a lot of the time.
Why I got angry and What I did wrong
The other thing that haunts me here is that I suffer from my own preference and identity abuse. People tell me that my writing will take me years to make me living, that I have to do work I don't like and they do in the interim. Reading is evil because it distracts me from my schoolwork. "Don't lift the big rocks."
And anything having to do with Bionicle or Lego is not allowed, because I'm "too old for it". The last time BZPower was uttered in my house, curse words were used around it. Not funny. That's the reason I have logged in anonymously for years, in case someone from the past remembers my BZPower handle. I don't want them going to the forums, seeing my name active, and running up the stairs to confiscate yonder computer.
I don't even pretend to know a fraction of the pain and suffering you guys go through. All I know is that it must be ten thousand times worse than the shadow I know.
For so long I pretended that my preferences on my working life didn't truly affect my thinking. Recent events have blown up that lie and shown it to me. As such, I have been, in some sense, fighting against myself. In the wake of that revelation, it made sense to check the truth and extend it, and check the extension.
The first step to understanding the truth about a subject is understanding what you really think about it. I've always disliked people who hate on people's preferences and fail to consider what the other person really means, even when I do it. As difficult as it may be, being honest with yourself and other people about who you are and what you really want should be encouraged, not discouraged. I had to learn that the hard way. Claiming that you aren't a certain way doesn't work.
I'd rather see the LGTBQ+ people walking around here openly acknowledging their preference/identity than denying it to themselves and to us. No matter what, we aren't doing them or us any favors by insisting we not talk about it - we're robbing ourselves of that perspective too.
But that's why I got so flipping mad. Personally, seeing preference abuse of any kind is still a sore spot for me. I forgive those who do it, but I don't want to see it happen to other people any more. I'm sick and tired of it.
So, sorry for getting mad, sticking my foot in my mouth, and acting like an idiot. Also hurting people. Hopefully this will help mend some wounds and stop the spread of misconceptionitis. I'm human, unfortunately, and those make mistakes.
I'm going to leave this open for now. Don't make me regret it. (If I see anything that even tastes like a disrespectful comment I am going to send it flying to Alpha Centuri. Unless you want to yell at or criticize me, which I will take.)
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