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I Have a Serious Question


~Shockwave~

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Okay, so I'm seeing if I can't get a second opinion that's in no way connected to my personal life.

 

OK, so a little less then a month ago I was at a local restaurant with my family for my father's birthday. When I went up to order the young lady who took it made note that she saw me there often, (which is true) and asked for my name. (She also gave me hers but I was kind of panicking at this point and I can't actually remember it.) Now, my family is convinced that she was flirting with me.

 

Based on my expierience being on both sides of customer service, I would not consider this normal practice, but my question to you is: at the very least, is that a reasonable assumption? My gut tells me that it's not, and even if it is a reasonable assumption I wouldn't know how to handle the situation, as it just feels fundamentally wrong to put somebody in that situation while at work.

 

Anyway, I know that's a weird question to ask here, but it's been bugging me for weeks and I thought putting it here might allow me to vent it out and also get a second opinion. Feel free to move right along if you have nothing to say.

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Always be suspicious of someone's actions when money (in this case tips) are on the line.

 

That being said, if you're fine with holding your head up high or never ever coming back if this backfires, there is something to be said for leaving her your number just in case.

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I would say that it depends on the setting. Certain restaurants require a name for a meal so she could've simply been following proper protocol.

 

Her mention of seeing you there could've been a friendly banter. If it was a restaurant that features waiters or waitresses then one could assume she was simply working for tips.

 

Once again, her giving her name could simply be restaurant protocol since it gives the impression that the employees are more personable. 

 

Now what's listed above is the obvious doubts. Now for the other way around.

 

She started a conversation by blatantly revealing that you've left an impression on her and that you're memorable to some degree. It sounds as though she then tried to get on a first name basis with you (which if you're thinking positively would mean that she's clearly interested in getting to know you). 

 

I'd say that with the details you've revealed it could really go either way. If you're interested in pursuing her it would be best to do so casually and not make a big deal about it. Since you go to this restaurant often, you could simply be honest with her and tell her that you're interested in taking her out. Then simply leave her a note with your number and tell her that if she's interested then call. If not then don't call. Simple as that. 

 

Of course if you're not interested in pursuing a relationship with her then just go about your day. 

 

Good luck,

 

~Soran

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How do the rest of the restaurant employees act? Towards not just you, but to other customers?

 

It could also be something as simple as pure curiosity. I think jumping straight to the conclusion that she's flirting with you when all she has done is ask what your name was. My advice is to just keep doing what you've been doing, and watch for any more behavior possibly pointing towards a relationship. There's nothing you really can do now anyway, so just be a little on guard.

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:kaukau: I've had plenty of times when I thought a girl was flirting with me but I was really just reading into it, so I'm leaning toward believing that this is just normal conversation.  I've also had it where my friends thought that a girl was flirting with me when she wasn't.  Of course, I wasn't there for your situation, so take my experience with a grain of salt.  You're probably much cuter and more magnetic than me.

 

24601

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@ Spirit: That's a fair point, but the tips are given at the time of order. You go up to the counter, put your order in and pay, then they bring it out to you. You can give a tip (I always do), but I'm not entirely sure if they would know how much, seems like that might cause some issues...

 

@Soran: To add to what's above, you're given a number and they bring the food to you. (It's a weird system), I'll be honest, I don't know anyone one there by name, first and last time I've given mine as well. It might also be worth noting that next time I went there that she remembered my name. I felt pretty bad because I didn't catch hers...

 

@Ghidora: It's hard to tell. Most of them are fairly reserved. I'm not jumping to that conclusion really, others where. Again, I genuinely don't know. If I do the same thing I always do, nothing changes. If I do something, it could go well, but it could blow up in my face. And there are absolutely things I can do, but I'm not good at this and I don't want to put her in an uncomfortable situation.

 

I would absolutely like to pursue this, I'm just not sure how to not am I sure I should.

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:kaukau: I've had plenty of times when I thought a girl was flirting with me but I was really just reading into it, so I'm leaning toward believing that this is just normal conversation.  I've also had it where my friends thought that a girl was flirting with me when she wasn't.  Of course, I wasn't there for your situation, so take my experience with a grain of salt.  You're probably much cuter and more magnetic than me.

 

24601

 

Right, well see,  I never think that, and I'm halfway convinced. There is some additional context here I suppose, but that was quite some time ago, so I'm going to go ahead and say it's irrelevant. I also seriously doubt that last statement

 

Romance her with some French:

 

"Ma cherie, veux-tu manger une bibliothèque? Je suis une pamplemousse."

Um...

 

 

Ma cherie , will you eat a library? I am a grapefruit.

Is not what I would consider saying at all but ok?

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@Ghidora: It's hard to tell. Most of them are fairly reserved. I'm not jumping to that conclusion really, others where. Again, I genuinely don't know. If I do the same thing I always do, nothing changes. If I do something, it could go well, but it could blow up in my face. And there are absolutely things I can do, but I'm not good at this and I don't want to put her in an uncomfortable situation.

Well, not much you can do now anyway. If anything else comes up, make sure to let somebody here know.

 

Ma cherie , will you eat a library? I am a grapefruit.

This is what you call a post from SPIRIT. A joke so bad even he hurts.

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@Ghidora: Again, I can, I just don't know what. And it's a bit more of a delicate situation as not being able to go back to that restaurant would make me very sad.

 

And yes, I picked up the joke, my friends make jokes like that all the time except Spanish because I live in Arizona and it's extremely common to encounter the language. I found it amusing and was simply responding with some playful banter to make it clear that I picked up what he was laying down, so to speak.

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And yes, I picked up the joke, my friends make jokes like that all the time except Spanish because I live in Arizona and it's extremely common to encounter the language. I found it amusing and was simply responding with some playful banter to make it clear that I picked up what he was laying down, so to speak.

Ah, my apologies.

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