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*punts Shar-pei*


Bundalings

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I wrote this today after getting the idea of Makuta and Shar-peis. Don't take it too seriously, I wrote it in about an hour and I never proof read it. In other news, I finally wrote more in my epic. :happydance:

::

Teridax angrily threw a baby shar-pei at the wall. "Why am I always thwarted?! Those silly Turaga and Matoran have pestered me for the last time! I will beat them! Hang my dastardly plans for keeping them on Mata Nui Random Big City! I will stop using exclamations now!"

The nearby Rahkshi wailed, "Oh no!" for no real reason. Such is the way with lizard men.

Teridax drummed his fingers against his desk. As he did so he cast a glance at his baby shar-pei terrarium. "Galloping Husi mothers! I'm nearly out of the infernal little stress relievers!"

The original baby shar-pei moaned as it staggered to it's feet. "What a world, what a world!" Teridax quickly turned and punted the unlucky hound. (While still in his office chair! Skilz!) it flew across the room and stuck in one of the Rahkshi's faces. From then on it was called Sharparahk; however, that is totally irrelevant.

"Go, Rahkshi minions! Get the box of extra shar-peis I keep!" Ordered Teridax.

Moments later they returned. "Oh no!" They wailed, "we are all out of extra doggies!"

Makuta sploded them all in his anger.

"I must get me some doggies!" Shouted the Makuta as he stormed out of his cubicle. "You! Minion," he shouted at a guilty bystander, "I am in angst of my little doggies, and I need your… how you say? Laptop? Give!"

He snatched it from the terrified creature (I'm not saying what kind) and stormed back to his cubicle, scattering the dust of his former lizard-man minions. The sound of their dustiness blowing away sounded like "oh no!" to all but the most trained ear.

Teridax plunked down in his chair, and set up the laptop. He searched for shar-peis at every site he could think of: Dogazon(always overprice), Shopcanines, Buydogs, Dogzilla, Doggrabber, even Dogo Shop @ Home. All were sold out. (Apparently it's a popular breed)

"Maybe you could go to eBay." Said a small, timid voice. It was the Creature.

"If I need your opinion I'll torture you for it! Scram, you nasty little vermin!"

When the Creature had gone Teridax typed in 'ebay.com'

Then 'shar-pei.'

He browsed the list of items.

Sharpei, slightly used, excellent condition. Current bid: ¢8

And other such things. Finally, after going to the bottom of page 86, he found what he was looking for.

HUGE LOT OF GREAT SHAR-PEI PUPPIES! 638 POUND LOT! UNTRUSTED TRAITOR! BUY NOW! $638!


"Just what I'm looking for!" Exclaimed Makuta as he hurriedly typed in his credit card number. He failed to notice the seller's positive feedback percentage was –638 until he had already paid. "Ah well." He said to himself, "he's a man after my own heart. I'm sure he won't cheat me."

*six hundred and thirty eight days later*

A FedEx dude came cautiously up to Teridax's cubicle, gun in hand. He spun around the corner and pointed it at Teridax's head with a shaking hand. "Are You makuta teridax?" He asked with an annoying squeaky voice.

"Yes~" replied Teridax angrily.

"Sign Here, And I'll Leave your Package." He said, cradling the package under his gun arm like a behbeh and handing his pad to Makuta with the other.

"How Bout you Stop Talking Down To ME And Give ME The Package!"

FedEx dude dropped everything and ran.

Teridax picked up his long-awaited package and rattled it. It hissed. "This doesn't seem like it's 638 pounds…" he said as he slowly cut the tape…

A black shape leaped out of the box and attached itself to his face. He was only able to say one sentence before he succumbed to it's powah.

ebaysharppei.jpg

::

And I just made this lovely banner for myself:
bunneh.jpg

-Taipu-
(really Bunda)

14 Comments


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So much win...

 

I should do something similar.

Banner or story is WIN? Or both?

 

Ooh, I just noticed two typos. Mata Nui in the first bit is supposed to be crossed out, and so is the UN in UNTRUSTED SELLER. Maybe I should make it UNTRUSTED TRAITOR... like untrusted trader...

 

>>

 

<<

 

Yessss...

 

-Taipu-

(really Bunda)

Oh yes, I was thinking about brushing it up and making it about a comedy, in which the Toa Mata/Nuva do they're quests in Random Big City. Search for the masks, Bohrok saga, MoL saga etc.

 

And then maybe I could do the Metru Nui saga in Even BIGGER City...

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That was the most random story I've ever read in the history of me reading anything in the history of the everything universe. Everything. :mellow:

 

Btw, the banner is WIN.

 

 

-D-

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That was the most random story I've ever read in the history of me reading anything in the history of the everything universe. Everything. :mellow:

 

Btw, the banner is WIN.

 

 

-D-

:evilgrin:

 

Oh, thanks.

 

-Taipu-

(really Bunda)

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That was the most random story I've ever read in the history of me reading anything in the history of the everything universe. Everything. :mellow:

 

Btw, the banner is WIN.

 

 

-D-

And it made sense too!

 

Good job, Bunda. This was very entertaining. Made my day probably. *goes to think about what made his day*

 

I don't know if you should turn this into a comedy. Good things like this just come, and if it's a comedy then you'll have to work at it.

Plus, shouldn't you use your time on that epic?

 

Makuta (who you shouldn't call Teridax) should have looked on Dogg-Link for some shar-peis.

 

-CF

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That was the most random story I've ever read in the history of me reading anything in the history of the everything universe. Everything. :mellow:

 

Btw, the banner is WIN.

 

 

-D-

And it made sense too!

 

Good job, Bunda. This was very entertaining. Made my day probably. *goes to think about what made his day*

 

I don't know if you should turn this into a comedy. Good things like this just come, and if it's a comedy then you'll have to work at it.

Plus, shouldn't you use your time on that epic?

 

Makuta (who you shouldn't call Teridax) should have looked on Dogg-Link for some shar-peis.

 

-CF

Thankee.

 

Ya, but I'm getting writer's block for my epic. All my ideas are for part 2.

(And sadly I can't merge them. 1 must come before 2, and the plots are too different to merge into one.)

 

I called him Teridax because it's funny, and I want the Nuva to ridicule him.

 

Oh yeah, I forgot Doglink and Dogs R Us!

I'll add them if I turn it into a comedy.

 

-Taipu-

(really Bunda)

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The story AND the banner are such epic win.

 

Especially the banner. What's that font called?

 

-A-

It's called Sand. I found it in Photoshop...

 

I'm thinking about making some comics about bunneh life.

 

>>

 

<<

 

-Taipu-

(really Bunda)

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