Duh!: The Stupid History of the Human Race is not the most epic book in the universe. (It comes close, though.)

The Encyclopedia of Immaturity is the most epic book in the universe.

I suggest you read it so you can learn how to fake a sneeze, say "Waiter, this soup you're serving me, am I the first to eat it?" in Hungarian, gauge your weight by stepping on chewing gum, etc.