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MetaStriker

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  1. MetaStriker
    Well, I unfortunately missed Day 6 due to some personal happenings...
     
    And today's Day 7. The end of my blog posts, for a long, long time.
     
    Since I made you guys wait a day for more blog content, I am going to do something somewhat risky.
     
    Here's a small segment from ​The Hero Tahu​.
     
    ===
     
    Its shape resembled that of a shark fin, but it paled in comparison to a much larger, finished tower, colored white-and-blue. A logo with an H adorned the side of the tower.
     
    “H...what could that stand for?” Gali mused.
     
    “Hapori Tohu?” Ackar suggested.
     
    Tahu snickered, but quickly regained his composure as Gali rolled her eyes. “H...huh...I got nothing.”
     
    Mata Nui gasped. “I KNOW!! I KNOW!!”
     
    “That doesn’t start with H,” Tahu muttered.
     
    “I’ve been to this system before!” Mata Nui exclaimed, completely ignoring Tahu’s sarcasm. “This is Makuhero City.”
     
    “Still doesn’t start with--okay fine I’m sorry!” Tahu stepped back, away from Gali as she raised her Axe.
     
    “You’ve been here before? How??” Gali asked Mata Nui, who squirmed around in his throne.
     
    Oh, Great Beings. I never told them that they’ve been living in a giant robot this whole time, did I? Well...we’re way past 2008, they should still know this by now. “I, uh, studied abroad. Anyway, that symbol’s for HERO FACTORY. Which means that this tower must be---”
     
    ===
     
    Well, I didn't promise you it'd be long! Just a little something to prove to you all that I am alive, and am actually working on the next season of the still-untitled-remake comedy.
     
    ...oh, FINE.
     
    ===
     
    Stronius: I ‘ave no idea what’s goin’ on.
     
    Berix: I mean, at least no one’s screaming WOOHOO!!!!
     
    TSO: Ouch. You really want me to go deaf too?
     
    Berix: If it means I get to salvage your eardrums, then sure.
     
    Stronius: Now I undastan’ why da special’s focusin’ on dem dree. You guys’re weird.
     
    Berix: And you have your weird speech impediment from the original. So you’re no different.
     
    ===
     
    That clearly makes no sense right now, but it doesn't have to. You'll see it all fit in very soon.
     
    And with that, thank you so much for reading this! Look out for ​The Hero Tahu​ coming to the Comedies forum, soon!!
     
    ​ALSO, PLEASE VOTE FOR THE NAME OF THE REMAKE COMEDY!!!
    ​~Meta
  2. MetaStriker

    Name-A-Comedy!

    By MetaStriker,

    Hey guys!
     






    http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/23623-tahus-transport/


    http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/24356-tahus-consequence/

     
    Now is your chance to choose a name for the untitled remake of ​The Adventures of Tahu​! The remake has been running since October 23rd, 2016 and currently features two complete seasons, Season 1: Tahu's Transport and Season 2: Tahu's Consequence (both shown above.) Season 3: The Hero Tahu, is currently in pre-production, with a Season 4 planned.
     
    So yes, I'm about halfway through the remake and I don't even have a title for the whole comedy yet. I've been thinking about it for a while, but I prioritized making the comedy over creating a title for it. Now that I am taking a hiatus to get my life in order, perfect THT, and post OKONICLE, I thought it'd be a great time to explore possible names for this remake, among my other promises to release other content from the comedy.
     
    So, here are my ideas. If you have any of your own suggestions, feel free to post them in the comments, along with whatever name you may vote for. Thank you so, so much!
    ​The Adventures of Tahu: Redux
    The New Adventures of Tahu
    Tahu's Adventure
    Tahu's Journey
    |Tahu|
    Order and Freedom
    The Flames of Freedom
    Sparks of Justice
    Invented Disaster
    Tahu's Adventures 2: This Time It's Not Tahu's Adventures 1
    ...and your own!

    If I think of more, I'll add them. Thank you!
     
    ~Meta
  3. MetaStriker
    Well, I guess they still haven't turned off Premier Perks. Which means I can still post on this blog.
     
    I really don't have much else to say, besides please for the love of all things vote for a title. That's about it.
     
    P.S. As quoted from Discord,
    I honestly wouldn't be surprised if the next game Sakurai is working on is a crossover between FE and Smash
     
    Like, all of the FE characters fight like they're in Smash, but there's an actual story, dialogue and choices like in FE
     
    Super Smash Bros. Emblem, releasing tomorrow. That's what Nintendo needs to sell 100M Switch units. That one game.
     
    Saturday, July 29th, 2017. Count on it.
     
    Can't possibly be a worse idea than The Emoji Movie​ anyway. Well, whatever. It's been a fun time.
     
    ~MetaStriker
  4. MetaStriker
    Hah, I said yesterday would be my last entry but it wasn't.
     
    I guess I didn't accurately grasp the concept of "one week" and didn't think the Premier Perks would extend all day Thursday. My bad.
     
    Well anyway, I really have nothing to reveal regarding the ​STILL UNTITLED REMAKE COMEDY​. At this point, I'm either going to have to go with SPIRIT's title or just slap something else up there.
     
    ​Also, make sure to check out OKONICLE: The Okay Chronicle!! It's a comedy collaboration between myself and Master Inika on the story of 2001...somewhat. Check it out, it's something that I hope is fun for everyone to read! Here's the link: http://www.bzpower.com/board/topic/25003-okonicle-the-okay-chronicle/
     
    Again, I don't have an official release date for The Hero Tahu​, but trust me when I say that I am working on it and it will most definitely come. Above all, I want to give the comedy the level of polish it deserves, no matter how long it takes, because I know it's all worth it.
     
    ​Perhaps I'll release a spin-off? I'm not entirely sure, but it's something I may look into eventually. Right now, my priorities are whatever's going on in my life, followed by OKONICLE, followed by THT. Whatever the case, I hope to be around here as much as I can. Until I feel that I'm done.
     
    ​And don't worry, I'm not done yet. I haven't been done for years. Even when I took a hiatus in 2013, I kinda figured I'd be back someday.
     
    ​I'm happy I am.
     
    ​See you next July 20th,
     
    ~MetaStriker
  5. MetaStriker
    Day 5!! Already two days before I bid my blog goodbye for a year.
     
    Sad.
     
    Well anyway, today I'm going to throw together some hodge-podge stuff. Some timeline info on the remake, some deleted scenes. Teasers for the third season will come tomorrow and Wednesday. Hope you enjoy!
     
    ​GENERAL NOTES ABOUT THE REMAKE
    Four seasons - Transport, Consequence, The Hero, ​CENSORED​ (what? I can't give you the title just yet!)
    Replacing The Adventures of Tahu canon ​(this is correct)
    Will obliterate The Fire Chronicles canon ​(Yes. As stated before, TFC and its sequel are no longer canon with the release of this comedy.)
    Releasing chapters weekly, at least 6-7 days apart ​(Besides a few monthly gaps, this remained mostly true.)
    PSAs, Specials, Interviews still exist ​(That they do.)
    Brutaka/Vezon storyline = main addition ​(Brutaka was a minor character in TAoT. Here, he's a major character along with Vezon, despite their mysterious showings so far. They'll be further explored in The Hero Tahu​.)
    More epicomedy ​​(Somewhat true, but a large number of chapters in this comedy have contradicted this.)Humor is mostly reserved to NAW characters ​(This is mostly true, however.)

    [*]TNTS, Narrator, Censorer, Transition Guy, Guardius, Formata, Extra Guy ​(Yup.)
    [*]No stupid romantic subplots. ​(Almost...)
    [*]Will Hero Factory appear? If so, not until S2E10. ​(You'll see.)
    [*]No fan-made characters or Nintendo storyline, besides NAW ​(Still remains true. Meta may be a white and gold version of Meta Knight, but he's also a part of MetaStriker so...)
    [*]Only Narrator ventures out of Wig Salon. ​(Pretty much. TSO joined him last-minute.)
    [*]Less extra characters; characters that appear are mainly recurring/play some major role in story ​(Mostly true, though I'm looking to add a few characters in The Hero Tahu​.)
    [*]More background ​(YES.)
    [*]Lewa's dead. ​(Yup. This was explained.)
    [*]Motivation for fighting. ​(I mean, if you haven't seen it by now...)
    [*]Still needs a title ​(sTiLL neeDS a TiTLe)


    ...seriously!! Please vote for a title.
     
    Next up...
     
    ​UNTITLED REMAKE COMEDY PLOT TIMELINE: 2006-2011
     
    2006
    NOTE: Everything before this year has gone just as usual in the plot.
    The Toa Inika defeat the Piraka. The Ignika falls into Mahri Nui, and the Toa pursue it.
    As Teridax's essence prepares to follow them into The Cord, a hurricane destroys the Piraka Stronghold.
    The Piraka and Umbra are killed; as the hurricane surfaces, the leader of the Order stands in the stronghold's ruins.
    Helryx stops Teridax from following the Toa and forces him to form an alliance with her, or face death.
    Suspicious, Brutaka questions Helryx's agenda. She ignores him.
    Axonn sides with Helryx in agreement, without hesitation. Brutaka attacks Axonn in disagreement, but Helryx fluidly pushes Brutaka away from them, into the raging storm outside.
    Helryx declares an end to the Order of Mata Nui and crowns herself as empress of the Orderly Empire.
    Teridax officially abandons his plans and joins her, reorganizing the Brotherhood of Makuta to be an army faction under the Order.

    ​2007
    The Toa Inika transform into the Toa Mahri, fighting the Barraki in search of the Ignika, Mask of Life.
    Helryx and Axonn travel to Odina to ally with the Dark Hunters. They meet some of the Toa Nuva there, convincing them to abandon their mission and return to Metru Nui.
    Helryx effortlessly convinces the rather dumb Shadowed One to ally with them, thus gaining control of the Dark Hunter army.
    Teridax possesses a Maxilos robot and, following Helryx's orders, travels to the Pit jail. He kills Lesovikk, Sarda and Idris during their fight with Karzahni. Though Karzahni despises Teridax, he allies with him to stop the Mahri and join the Empire's ranks.
    Axonn returns to Voya Nui to lead the Voyatoran into the Nui Caves. They disappear.
    TSO orders a siege of Voya Nui, looting the volcano of resources and destroying all known evidence of the beings' existence on the island.
    Vezon comes across the unconscious Brutaka and awakens him. The two realize the Dark Hunters are attacking the island and decide to escape together. Brutaka creates a dimensional portal and they disappear through it.
    Axonn enters the Cord, descending to the five Toa Mahri who are preparing to destroy it. Matoro locates and swims toward the Ignika.
    Helryx appears, knocking Matoro unconscious. She fails to retrieve the Ignika, which falls past the void of Voya Nui into Karda Nui.
    The Toa Mahri ascend the Cord with the Mahritoran and destroy the Cord. Behind them, Axonn effortlessly knocks out the group, placing them into stasis tubes.
    He meets up with Helryx, who is lugging along Matoro in a stasis tube, and they teleport back to Daxia Fortress.
    Mata Nui dies.

    2008
    The Ignika falls into Karda Nui alone, where it sinks to the bottom of the swamp.
    Lewa, who is using the Great Sundial to find the Codrex, notices something fall into the water. Levitating it from the Swamp of Mystery, Lewa dons the Ignika to revive Mata Nui and dies, unbeknownst to anyone but the remaining Av-Matoran, who have no way of contacting beings outside of Karda Nui.
    Mata Nui is revived, but is confined within the Ignika. The mask sinks back into the swamp and lays dormant for nine years.
    Helryx and Axonn secure the stasis tubes in Daxia Fortress. Helryx rebuilds Teridax's old body and appoints him Assistant to Her Orderly Empress. Axonn is appointed Her Orderly Mercenary, Karzahni is appointed Her Orderly General, and TSO is appointed Her Orderly Stalwart.
    Helryx calls for a mass meeting in the Coliseum. She announces that Mata Nui has died despite the efforts of the Toa Mahri, but she will be leading in their stead under the Orderly Empire.
    Suspicious, Taka sneaks to Mangai, where he finds that the Bahrag are still imprisoned, the Great Sundial is gone, and there is no sign of Lewa's body anywhere. He returns to Metru Nui without being noticed.
    The remaining Toa Nuva are appointed Her Special Guard. Helryx mentions that Lewa failed to obtain the Great Sundial and was murdered alone by the Bahrag.
    Reunification between the Matoran/Toa/Turaga and the Makuta/Dark Hunters occurs
    Brutaka and Vezon arrive in the actual BIONICLE storyline, observing what could have happened if everything went as planned. Realizing the horror of Helryx's plan, they try to go back, but teleport into a different dimension…

    2009
    On Bara Magna, the Skrall attack the Arena Magna during the Great Tournament and destroy it.After several months of fighting, the separated tribes all surrender to the Rock Tribe. The Skrall Empire, led by Tuma, takes control of Bara Magna and dismantles the Glatorian system.

    [*]Brutaka and Vezon arrive in "The Adventures of Tahu" storyline. They realize how bad the writing and jokes are and get out of there.
    [*]Taka journeys to Artakha and tells the being about his discovery. Artakha begins to dissent against the Orderly Empire.


    2010
    BIONICLE ends in the real world.
    The story of HERO FACTORY is established in the real world, and thus becomes a part of all alternate universes.Von Nebula loses to the Alpha Team, and is jailed inside his Black Hole Staff, spiraling through black holes continuously.

    [*]Artakha continues to reject the ideals of the Empire. Karzahni quietly lays siege to the island, destroying its Crystal Serpents and imprisoning his brother on his own island.
    [*]Brutaka and Vezon arrive in "Tahu vs. Tahu," where they see Tahu Stars singing his sword. Scrambling into the basement, they meet the dual Vezon toys for a quick sip of tea before they jump to another dimension.


    2011
    I join BZPower on March 19th, 2011.
    BZPower's Forum Construction occurs. The forums return in October 2011.
    Defeated, Von Nebula continues to spiral through tunnels of his black hole.He finally emerges on the coffee table of the Toa Nuva meeting room in Daxia Fortress. They freak out and alert Helryx.
    Helryx also freaks out. Teridax rushes in and uses his shadow powers to reanimate the portal and send Von Nebula back through the black hole.

    [*]Aware that Artakha has been incarcerated for rebelling, Taka goes to the Turaga of Metru Nui. They have also been suspicious of the empire. He tells them to not tell any of the Toa Nuva, but Nokama tells Gali.
    [*]Brutaka and Vezon arrive in "Choose Your Own BIONICLE Adventure." They choose to hop another dimension.


    ===
    Wow. I'm sure that provided a ton of backstory. Keep in mind that the remake takes place in 2016-2017, so there's still five years of content I've yet to reveal
     
    One more small tidbit:
     
    Deleted Scene (Tahu’s Transport, Chapter 5)
     
    Moments passed. Moments turned to minutes. Minutes passed to ten-minute increments, because the author just had to draw out the dramatic effect as long as possible.
     

    …



    You can’t disagree.


     
    Now, normally this is the part where Helryx has some dramatic monologue about trying to find a little droplet of water to create a geyser out of, which symbolizes how one little slice of hope can achieve success. But since this is the second time we’re retelling this story, we’re going to drag out the dramatic effect of waiting even longer. And even longer than that.
     
     

    You know what I don’t agree with? The fact that we managed to fix so much about what was going wrong with this comedy, yet you got more annoying.



    Dude. Character development.



    Dude. Plot > Pointless Little Banter Between The Author And His Annoying Narrator.



    Keep math out of this.


     
    As a droplet of water fell from a broken sewage pipe, the droplet expanded in milliseconds to create a geyser out of.
    ===
    ​Short, but sweet. I cut that part out because it was too drawn out and too rant-y for my tastes. This would've occurred from when the crowd of Matoran, Toa and Turaga rush into Nuju's Lab to see Helryx seemingly crushed under the pile of debris to when she rises out to give her terrorizing speech and kills Nuju.
     
    Good stuff.
     
    See you all tomorrow!! Hope you enjoyed this post and if you have any thoughts why not post them below in the comments?
     
    ~Meta
  6. MetaStriker
    (You're probably thinking to yourself, wow, that was fast.)
     
    ---
     
    The Fire Chronicles: Finale
     
    Part 3: The Flames Die Out Forever?
     
    Several millennia ago only seemed like a few days ago for Angonce.
    He had spent his entire life on the planet, left to deal with beings on his own while other Great Beings left to party some light years away. And as if that wasn’t enough, he also had to deal with keeping Ranox imprisoned until the day his destiny broke him free. It was safe to say that Angonce hadn’t been having the greatest of times, and why he wanted at least one of his problems to go away made sense for sure.
    As Angonce battled Ranox, he thought about these things. Yeah, nothing more really needs to be said. That’s enough psychological torment for now, guys.
    Seriously, I need a new day job!
     
    Below Ranox…
     
    “Are you sure about this, Photok?”
    “He…took everything from me…my camera…my friends…my freaking liberty…well, I’m gonna give him death.”
    Tanma activated his wings, and Photok, on his back, activated his jet engine-thingy. “For Unity, Duty, and Destiny, let’s kill this thing, brother. For Takua.”
    “FOR TAKUA!” Photok screamed as they flew into the sky and attacked Ranox. Tahu only watched from the bottom, still in shock.
    “There’s got to be something. Why didn’t Ranox die when Helryx sacrificed herself?! They—should—both—be—dead.”
    “Because maybe, just maybe, the prophecy has more to tell us.” Gali landed swiftly right next to him, and gave Tahu the two parts.
    “That’s…incredible. What do we even—“
    A wave of water pushed the two away milliseconds before a giant ball of shadow fell down below the beast, and they washed ashore next to the Wall of Records. Tahu was shivering. “How—much—longer—“
    “It’ll be over soon, don’t—“
    “CAN’T YOU SEE WHAT I’VE DONE? I RUINED EVERYTHING. I RUINED OUR DESTINIES.” Tahu stood up, swaying back and forth as fresh fire coursed through him. “EVERYONE’S DEATH IS MY—“
    “NO!” Nuhrii and Gali tackled Tahu before he unleashed a Nova Blast and burned away the entire planet.
    “Stop it! None of this is your fault, none of it at all! You gave me a chance to redeem myself, a chance for everyone to rise up against this fiend and crush his hopes and dreams! And although many will go, and all will cry…”
    Tahu snapped out of his rage. His mask flashed gold as an ancient voice came from him.
    “Hidden in the forgotten land, is the story that started after the sand…the power of seven shall stand. The quiet one shall be humble until the end, but the host will seek power, and power she shall lend…to both aid and defend.
    There is one more fatal blow, to continue the universe’s go…two will go although, and two will mourn with a steady flow. The fallen rule shall arise in surprise, and with the other, eliminate the demise…and though many will go, and all will cry…”
    Gali and Nuhrii looked at each other nervously. The prophecy had unfolded right from Tahu’s mouth, right in front of their very eyes.
    They didn’t understand much of it, however. But Tahu did, and the truth startled him. “I need to get onto Ranox’s back.”
    “…what even…” Kiina said, rushing in.
    “I’ll tell you later…maybe. But guys, this is what needs to happen. And without buts, or whys, or any dissatisfactions, this needs to occur now. We’re so close, guys. So close.”
     
    In the Air…
     
    “You can’t win—Nui—not again…”
    Mata Nui swung his blade blindly and effortlessly as it cleanly sliced off the Prototype Robot’s head. He watched as the robot turned into a dark, shadowy dust and the head plummeted into a legion of Bokoblins.
    Mata Nui turned swiftly as he was scratched by the claws of the ferocious beast. As he moved his head more towards Ranox in an attempt to get him to touch the Mask of Life, the Great Beast kicked at Mata Nui’s chest, knocking the wind out of him and causing him to fall, as he fell he shrunk to his old size so he would not damage his fellow comrades.
    Ranox hovered above the ground, high in the air, as his feet began to grow closer to the ground. In doing so, Ranox grew at least one and a half times his size, and his red eyes continued to glow menacingly.
    "All is going according to plan. I can't fail now!"
    A flash of stars appeared before his eyes, and Ranox was startled to see Kirby and Angonce fly ahead of him, straight for his shadowy wings. Super Sonic hopped off Kirby’s Dragoon and made a halo-shaped tear in the first of the Great Beast’s wings, while Angonce simply tore through it in his own starship.
    As Ranox fell to the ground, his legs extended just a little bit, and his arms grew even more to come close to the length of his legs. Ranox snarled as he hit the ground, and shockwaves spread throughout the planet, killing most of its fauna and knocking down a good deal of the army. “Don’t worry, I can still kill you all on—wait, what is on my back?!”
    Tahu sat comfortably on Ranox’s back, his swords pointed down at the beast’s body. His mask was solid gold, and he gave off a radiant vibe of fearlessness and hope as he began stabbing Ranox.
    As Ranox turned behind him, Kiina thrust her trident into Ranox’s eye, which made Ranox grasp for his hurt eye. His legs imbalanced, he fell to the ground as cannons and mortars, commandeered by Nuhrii, Snake, and the Toa Voya, shot at the beast.
    “We did not fight in vain, Ranox. I hope you know that now, that all you have fought for wasn’t worth it.”
    “No…Tahu…maybe they did not fight in vain, but you…certainly did!” Ranox rolled around onto his back, thrusting the Toa off near the Council. In about two seconds, Ranox had turned back around and pounced onto the Toa, punching him with a shadowy fist that sent another shockwave across the planet after crushing the hero’s life force out of him.
    “TAHU! NO!” Kiina screamed, lunging at the beast.
    “YOU CANNOT WIN NOW, SEE? I HAVE DESTROYED YOUR ONE, GREAT LEADER, AND NOW HE IS GONE. AND NOW, I WILL GET RID OF EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU, AND CREATE A NEW WORLD FROM THE REMAINS OF YOUR OWN DEMISES!”
    “No, you will not!” A knight in gray-purplish armor appeared and stabbed Ranox in the forehead.
    The beast stumbled back and fell, clutching his head. “What—ow—is the meaning of—“
    “Hello, old master.” Axonn stood on Ranox’s face, bold, tall, and powerful, with Ooccoo holding the Dominion Rod on his shoulder. “Fancy seeing you here in this interesting situation. I mean, I could swear you told old Axxie that he was getting something out of this, but I mean, if you want to kill me now—“
    All the remaining members of the Orderly Empire II army surrounded Ranox, every single one of them ready to fire.
    “—you’re gonna have a baddd time.”
    Ranox smirked. “You honestly think your army can—“
    “I didn’t say my army. I said that Axxie could…or rather, the prophecy did. So, I mean…I guess it’s gonna happen now…any last words?”
    “You insignificant flea! You honestly think that you and your mediocre army can kill me? Screw the prophecy…what were the words to that stupid thing anyway…only one again can rise?”
    “Sure,” Axonn said as he slammed his axe into Ranox’s gaping wound, and his vision turned white.
     
    ……are we in Heaven yet……?
     
    The Fire Chronicles
     
    Epilogue: Tight Ends (we hope)
     
    To Whoever it May Concern…
     
    If you’ve found this letter, well, you’ve probably been through a lot to find it. Either that, or you probably just got bored and started digging randomly near the Left Lake. I’m fine with either.
     
    Anyway, to start off, I was Tahu: Toa of Platinum at the time of writing this letter, but by the time you read this I’ll hopefully be vacationing somewhere in Tahiti…and I’ll also be known as Metahu. Sound confusing? I’m sorry, but it doesn’t get any easier from here, cupcake.
     
    Anyway, my alternate self and I have decided to split up the events after the Great War against Ranox. I guess I’ll talk about the boring stuff.
     
    After that white blinding light and stuff, Ranox’s dead beastly body kind of exploded but then sucked itself into a tiny little ball. Meta and I were the only ones awake to cast off the antagonistic particles into some other comedy, and then the vision cleared and Mata Nui restored the land to normal (again).
     
    I finally decided to cast away the Nintendo characters, as most of them belong in the new Smash and other games anyway (poor Ice Climbers though). It took about a month to rebuild everything else, although this was mainly because Meta and I sort of assisted/sat back, relaxed and drank some nice English tea. Overall, I plan to never come back and to forever seal myself away from this comedic drama…I guess to save my power? I don’t know…maybe I’m sounding just a tad bit cruel here.
     
    ~Tahu: Toa of Platinum
     
    To Our Next Great Hero (or possibly a gravedigger)…
     
    If you’ve found this by the East Lake, hey, you are a Warp Star! (Ugh, that was super corny.)
     
    My name was originally Meta Nuva, but by the time you read this I’ll be back with my somewhat mediocre opposite, merged into the wonderful new Metahu (jeez, I just hope there’s no relation to that other Great Being…)
     
    I’ve been tasked with giving a report of the occurrences of today’s troubles and stuff. So, instead of making you read a flashback of sorts, I’ll just get straight to the point. Yes, the prophecy was fulfilled, and one again did rise… thankfully it wasn’t Ranox, otherwise we’d all be dead by now. Pretty much all of the good guys made it out relatively well, and now that the remainder of the Orderly Empire’s beings are leader-less, Axonn’s made a pact with Tahu to merge both empires…no Orderly Hau though…that’d be way too weird.
     
    Gali and Kiina both survived, and both have come to the mutual agreement not to fight over Tahu (thank Nui.) Nuhrii has also been honored as a war hero, as well as Axonn and his trusty bird, who also somehow survived the fight to rejoin Link and return to the gaming world.
     
    Icarax and Takadox, while not playing a huge role in the war, did fight on our side with their legions of Rahkshi. However, when offered to be a part of the Council, both declined and went up north. Their activity is confusing, but I’m not worried at the moment…
     
    That really wraps it up. There’s not much of anything left to say here. Really, I’ve got nothing.
     
    “And you say that I rave-rant.”
     
    “Shut up, Narrator. Just because you did help save the universe does not give you the right to sass me around. Especially when I’m merged with that mediocrist.”
     
    “Aw.”
     
    “Mediocrist isn’t even a word, Meta.”
     
    “Shut up, Titler. Can we just get this over with?”
     
    “Why do you want this to be over so quickly?”
     
    “With your creations, anything can go wrong, even in the final chapter.”
     
    “…you sort of have a point there. Ah well. Any final words?”
     
    “Sorry this doofus here wrote such an awful tale.”
     
    “Sorry you had to deal with this guy, and that stupid Great Being too.”
     
    “What stupid Great—“
     
    “See what you did? You’ve already sparked a sequel to this tragedy!”
     
    “Even though it’s already been announced…”
     
    “It’s not like anyone’s actually going to read it.”
     
    “Shut up, Narrator. Let’s just get this over with.”
     
    *_*_*_*
     
    That night, Mata Nui had a very interesting dream.
     
    It started out in the form of a Nintendo Direct, revealing several features of Super Smash Bros. for Wii U. Though Mata Nui only believed it was a dream, it was actually implemented into his head using Kirby’s mystical dream powers…if that’s what we’re calling them.
     
    The dream then shifted to Mata Nui and a few other ancient beings sitting around a dying campfire. As Mata Nui shook hands with one of them, the fire died instantly, only leaving behind its gray, but still glowing red ashes and embers. He felt chills of power, if that’s what you want to call it, surging through his body as he woke up, shivering.
     
    “That…was only…a dream…right?” No answer. Mata Nui sighed a sigh a relief. “Well then, I guess there’s no problem here.”
     
    The—
     
    “Nice EarthBound reference.”
     
    “FOR THE LOVE OF KARZAHNI, NEX!”
     
    End?
     
    ---
     
    I did post The Ashes, the nex...t installment in the TAoT series, without finishing this comedy, but I ended up cancelling it; it had very little response from the forum, was heavily unfocused, and really wasn't planned out all that well. For all intents and purposes, I am not posting any drafts from that comedy, really because I don't have much and it all makes no sense.
     
    What I'm planning to do now is vent on this blog, as expected, but also release content regarding the third season of the remake of TAoT. Later today, I'm also going to be posting a poll, sort of, where anyone will be able to suggest/vote for a title to the comedy. Keep in mind that I already have titles for each season of the remake. What I want is an overarching title that represents the comedy and plot of the story as a whole, without being terribly basic. Let's get the creative juices flowing!
     
    See you soon,
     
    ~Meta
  7. MetaStriker
    WOW, I didn't post at all all of yesterday and today.
    I'm just going to blame Splatoon 2 for that. The game is quite a beaut.
     
    Anyway, today I'm going to post the first half of THE FIRE CHRONICLES FINALE!! I originally never posted this because I thought it was horrible. While it indeed wasn't my best work, I still feel like I should have posted it, just as a form of closure to the comedy. The Fire Chronicles was cancelled in 2013 as a result of this, and also due to me entering a new phase in my life as well as the bloody data wipeouts in October 2013.
     
    Without further ado...
     
    ---
     
    The Fire Chronicles: Finale
     
    Part 1: The Dark Storm
     
    “We have to get out of here. There’s no question anymore. There has to be a way. Isn’t there?”
    Nuju paced through the lobby, thinking. Suddenly, he stopped dead in his tracks. “Perhaps there is one way. Now that Ranox has entered the surface, there shouldn’t be anyone left to guard inside. The question is…where the gate is.”
    “Well, wouldn’t you know?” TT said.
    “I thought you would know, actually. I figured the Narrator would have said something.”
    “Oh, please, he never tells us anything of notable importance,” Guardius said, facepalming. “Half of the time he rants on and on about how no one respects him and stuff, but to be honest, the rest of us are really feeling that too.”
    “Well, I guess you’re royally screwed then.”
     
    In the Clearing…
     
    As the Council was blown to bits, time seemed to slow as a dark purplish cloud rose from the rubble. Actually, time did slow as Tahu, wearing the Vahi, dodged Ranox’s staff swing and flew out of the evil cloud. As he rose and looked around, he saw several horrendous sights.
    First, the ground around the Destiny Lake was enflamed. Just outside of the fire, Rahkshi, Visorak and Dark Hunters attempted to knock members of the opposing army into the fire. A few succeeded. Tahu turned away.
    The sky was also a dark purple, and it rained Shadow Bugs along with dark, hideous, giant monsters. Tahu watched as one of the monsters dove into a tree, and the tree was vaporized instantly.
    “Now, you see, we’ve hit the true terror. I’ve been waiting for millennia to unravel this plan, and now it’s about time the party’s begun. And yes, it’s only begun. I haven’t even brought beings back from the dead yet.”
    Ranox emerged from the shadowy vortex glowing black and purple. All signs of a water Toa’s body had now completely disappeared, and all hope of possible salvation was dissipated by gleaming red eyes.
    “I won’t kill you yet, though, hero. It doesn’t look like you’ve seen the terror of your consequences yet.”
    “I hate you,” Tahu snarled.
     
    In the North…
     
    Blasting another twenty foes away with her hydraulics, Kiina could already feel her powers subsiding. The army was gaining on them.
    “I won’t…give…up!” Malum yelled, shooting rows of flames at their opposers. “You’ll never take me dead!”
    “That’s because you’re immortal, duh, man,” Onua groaned as he pounded the earth, shaking Kraata out of their shells.
    Kiina stumbled, being cornered by Axonn and his trusty…bird. “No…stop…I’ve fought too long and hard…”
    “And yet there is one more fatal blow…wait a minute. What was that?” Axonn queried.
    “Nothing of your concern.” A wall of water slammed into the titan, knocking him into the river by the Water Gate. Axonn attempted to hold onto the rocks and stay amongst the steady current, but another blast pried his fingers off it and down the rocky rapids.
    Gali helped Kiina stand, then channeled another flood into the horde. “It’s not easy being us,” she said as she channeled a wave to sweep away their remains. “But we can deal. I think.”
    “I hope so.”
    “Even so…two will go although.”
    Wincing, Kiina committed herself to remembering the phrases as she channeled a huge sphere of water and hurled it at Karzahni…slowly beginning to realize the evils of their destiny.
     
    In the Desert…
     
    Right nex to the Lab of the Great Beings, a pitch-black hole had opened up. As some Goombas and Stalfos had realized after their fellow troops fell in, there seemed to be no way out. Or was there?
    Out of the hole peeked a little half-sphere, old and rising, and as the object continued to rise, Mata Nui’s eyes widened as he saw what exactly was happening.
    There, off the Prototype Robot, hung fifteen or so fallen enemies, and in the robot’s fist, were none other than CS, TT, Guardius and Chief, and in the robot’s eyes, glowed a familiar and extremely unsettling pair of red eyes.
    Teridax chuckled. “Looks like we don’t have a choice but to crush you, brother,” Teridax said, stomping his foot down into the soft sand and sending shockwaves throughout the planet.
     
    To Be Continued.
     
     
    The Fire Chronicles: Finale
     
    Part 2: Slight Reinforcements?
     
    A flash of light appeared and cut open Teridax’s grip on his prisoners. As Mata Nui willed himself to grow to a massive size, Meta Nuva caught his falling coworkers as TTP froze Teridax’s legs with solid platinum.
    Teridax stood, dumbfounded. “What is this—“
    “Your demise,” Icarax yelled, sending a huge shadow punch into Teridax to topple him backwards into the dark pit. Heh, dark pit. That was a good one, wasn’t it?
    “Not really,” Meta said, landing on the ground to let his teammates rejuvenate. “It’s actually a spoiler for the sequel. Which means I probably should—“
    Ganondorf’s shadowy Warlock Punch interrupted Meta and knocked him halfway across the desert. “You should probably shut the Helryx up,” he said, taunting with his sword.
    “I should have never let you into my comedy,” TTP said, channeling a silvery fire at the warrior. At the moment the fire hit him, he disappeared instantly.
    “Too bad you didn’t think of that with me,” Teridax said, rising from the pit again. “As long as this hole remains, the dead can keep coming back. Oh, look! There’s all those Rahkshi your friends just killed off.”
    TTP’s head immediately snapped in the direction of the dark pit. A horde of Rahkshi and Visorak rose up and started thundering towards him. “Ofrick. We’re screwed.”
     
    *_*_*_*
     
    “My power grows as each second passes. More of your troops die and are forever lost as each second passes. Look at what you’ve done, you pesky flea. All your friends die in vain, bound to some stupid, made-up prophecy. Ha, even my hostess believed in it. That’s why I’ve taken over her now. She can’t tread in my fate now.”
    Ranox swung his staff at Tahu, who, despite tiring, still blocked the blow. His mask began to shimmer in a golden light. “And how do you know what the future holds?”
    “Because I’m shaping it up to be in my own, perfect image. My planet to rule. I’ll finally show my two brothers who the real boss is. To create, I found difficult, but to destroy, is so easy. I’ll destroy all of you. But you won’t live to see it.”
    “Maybe you won’t live to achieve it.” Angonce appeared suddenly right next to Ranox, who jumped.
    “Get out! I will kill you. I don’t need you.”
    “Neither does she. And she’s very, very mad at you for what you’ve done to her.”
    “What do you mean by—“ Ranox paused suddenly, as he saw his arm pointed out and his staff aimed at his mask. “What are you playing—“
    “He’s not playing at anything,” said a familiar voice. “Don’t blame Angonce for your fate.”
    Tahu’s jaw was hanging. “Is that—it can’t be—“
    “Don’t stutter, Tahu. You know who I am. And why I’ve come back—for this short while.”
    “Put down the staff.”
    “I will not put down the staff. It’ll fall on its own right after I do this one, small thing—“
    “Helryx, don—“
    As she shoved the staff right through her skull, a high-pitched scream emanated from Helryx’s body as the shadowy form of Ranox exploded out of it. The noise froze time for five seconds, and after those five seconds everyone’s eyes darted to Helryx’s now-purified-but-still-lifeless body.
    The planet was silent as the armies huddled together, and they all stared at the one being that had made them fight for so long, and the sacrifice that unified them all as the dark pit closed at last.
    Needless to say, but since I’ve already broken this nice, peaceful, moment, I will say it anyway, this all lasted only a minute.
    Before all heck broke loose…again.
     
    *_*_*_*
     
    Tahu’s army looked up, jaws hanging and weapons dropped, as a ferocious beast hung in the sky. It was nothing more than a dark swarm of shadow, enlightened (or en-darkened?) by a pair of bright, glowing red eyes.
    “You thought a mere mortal could defeat me? How gullible of you! Seriously, please take out your phones and take a selfie with those dumb expressions on your faces. I actually won’t kill you.”
    Photok pulled out his Polaroid camera and, turning it around, took a selfie with his incomprehensible expression before Ranox sent a shadow dagger flying through the center of the camera and completely destroying it.
    As Photok’s expression changed to that of a spoiled little boy who didn’t get every LEGO set he wanted for Christmas, Ranox simply laughed. “What…I’m entitled to having some fun before I kill all of you!”
    Photok was fuming. “You killed my hero…you ruined my future…now…I’m going to ruin yours.”
    “Really? How?!” asked Ranox, albeit very, very sarcastically.
    Tahu whistled, and TTP and Meta’s army stood right in front of Tahu’s army, with the two spilt personalities leading the pack. Angonce also materialized above them, riding a golden starship that was meant to fly.
    “And you think that’s going to defeat me? You should raise your hands up, and touch the sky. You can’t mess with the destiny that I’ve created.”
    Angonce shook his head. “You’ve got it all wrong. You can’t mess with the destiny created long before us, and whatever happens now is up to what they wrote…what we all believe in…and our unity overpowers your supposed duty significantly.”
    “Heh, we’ll see about that—actually, no, only I will. All of you unfortunately won’t live to.”
     
    To Be Concluded.
     
    ---
    That was the first half of the finale--the second half will be posted tomorrow! I know it doesn't make a ton of sense but if you want to know more, you can of course leave a comment below! Thoughts?
     
    ~Meta
  8. MetaStriker

    Day 2

    By MetaStriker,

    Wow, already one day passed for blog perks.
     
    Stay tuned, guys, because I'm posting as much on here as I can, within reason. I'll probably post some old chapter drafts on here, as well as teaser stuff on Season 3: The Hero Tahu of the remake series, the latter of which is currently still untitled.
     
    On another note, I'm very excited for Splatoon 2. I don't understand why everone's criticizing it for being exactly like Splatoon OG, the gameplay was near-flawless in that game and didn't need much improvement. Obviously features like VOICE CHAT and changing your weapon between matches would have been nice additions, but it doesn't take away from the core gameplay in all its glory. With all of the CoD, FIFA, and Madden games that are reskins of the titles from previous years, I don't understand why Splatoon 2 is getting beat on so much, especially when it does have newer features, like a better single-player campaign and Salmon Run, among newer weapons, a far fresher UI, and crisper graphics. The real reason that Splatoon 2 even exists right now is so Nintendo can further promote the series and fuel Switch sales; it's a series that is clearly capable of doing so, as the original title proved so well.
     
    Well, with that, I'm going to sleep. I'll definitely be enjoying Splatoon 2 tomorrow but make sure to stay tuned for more content coming straight to ​NAME AND ADDRESS WITHHELD​​!
     
    ~Meta
  9. MetaStriker
    Wow. After five-plus years of being a member of BZP, I finally got around to making a blog during BZP's anniversary week. Took me long enough
     
    Happy anniversary, BZP. Thanks for all the opportunities you've provided to me over the years, whether for the cheeky set reviews, news about BIONICLE and LEGO, the forum upgrades, and the ability to hone my own skills in comedy and writing.
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