Mr. House

Try to redirect the nukes to the moon. It had it coming.

WWYDI you all of a sudden you acquired a German accent?

IC: (Tarotrix)

He nodded politely. Taro honestly didn't know of anything strange going on in the volcano, but if it was dangerous, knew he had to kill whatever it was.

IC: (Tarotrix)

"May I ask, sir, what you believe is within the volcano? Specifically?" Taro said, slightly dismayed at the lack of beer, and being herded out like a sheep.

IC: (Tarotrix)

Tarotrix was clad in the armor of a scout, unusual for an infantry Colonel, but far more suitable for going into a volcano. He stood the right of Loraan, decidedly rigid in posture.  

We need a Guild of Crazy People so we can get some lessons on spreading anarchy and chaos and aydda yddad.

The Agents of Chaos, Mata Nui edition...

I go to sleep for six hours in an attempt to rest so I could review a comedy, and I wake up to see someone has attacked the Dasaka.

 

Really.

 

Looking at it I can't see any plan but throw fireball in a village of water.

I know. Honestly, I don't get why people make lunatic characters and just set them out on public events to attempt to kill/bomb/maim/kick puppies. Those kinds of characters are fun, but karz, make something of them instead of sending them to certain capture and beheading.

Hold subliminal messages. The Calendar companies purposefully manipulate them to sell bonds.

Cups.

IC: (Mons Shajs)

He would escort them, Shajs thought. It would only be cordial of him.

"Toa Leah," he said respectfully, standing a couple feet behind her. "I'ma Corporal Mons Shajs, an'a I'la be a escortin' tha delegation, on'a behalf'a tha Marines. If ya don'ta mind..."

The Brotherhood needs more cultists. Come on, we have semi-permanent zombies, and black magic!  

IC: (Mons Shajs)

Shajs had kept a guarded posture during the attack, wondering why the lunatics always attacked at the worst times. He was determined to keep the dock and the dignitaries safe from harm, so his hand stayed firm upon his pistol-grip until the idiot was knocked out by Toa Leah. When the Maru came to greet the foreigners, he stepped back, saluted, and let her fill the role of emissary. He was still adamant upon guarding the area, so he stayed put, in as rigid a posture he could take. Look more professional, he thought. The Marine knew the drill, but was far from used to it. 

OOC: Timeskip...

IC: (Tarotrix)

It had been a little while since his meeting with Dorian, and Taro had turned in his report in full. Afterword, he started his routine all over again. Though at the moment, he was lounging in the Drunken Murderess, enjoying a ale and lunch with a couple of other guards. He was taking a sip, listening to one of the young investigators ramble on about a Turaga. 

I agree, at least in regards to the Brotherhood. The Guard put up a heck of a fight. Larikon's going to be leaning on a cane for a while.

Granted. It's filled with maggots.

I wish for a glass of water.

 

A conspiracy by the Canadian Crown to retake New England.

 

SHUT UP

 

Tim Hortons was a noble part of our lives LONG BEFORE you Americans dipped your filthy noses into it YOU PEOPLE RUIN EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH

 

Woah, I haven't anything against Canada, man. I was just making a joke. Heck, I don't even live in New England, nor have I ever had Tim Hortons (I am partial to Krispy Kreme, honestly). No need to get uppity, it's a game.

Anyways, Mayonnaise is actually a part of a conspiracy by A&W Root Beer to make people drink more soda. 

Tom and Jerry. 

Not for long, at least under its present administration.  

Where are the Ko-Koroan refugees fleeing to?

IC: (Rakona)

By far, Rakona and her companions had managed to secure a large area of the Koro without much resistance. Large numbers of Matoran had evacuated, but a sizable number remained. They had killed guards escorting civilians, and forced the villagers into buildings, to trap them in with earthen walls. The young and the old were long gone, so most that remained were in fairly healthy shape. Suitable for conversion or slavery. It would be good, she thought. The new village would need them.

Ak'rei'an be praised, the heathen city is almost ours.

IC: (Sukot urn Voyuk)

Well, the city was doomed anyways. The Sanctum Guard put up one karz of a fight, He'd get out, fast, to avoid becoming a lapdog to some lunatic Makuta-servant. Though he was wounded, he had managed to patch himself up relatively well. He was in pain, but not bleeding profusely. But thing was, he was trapped in the city, and needed to find a way to go out scot-free...

If we do, we shall violate THE NATURAL ORDER!

...BZPRPG has a TV Tropes page?

 

That's it.  I've been in a LOT of different roleplays all around the internet... but I declare this one to be the best one ever to exist.

 

And I was like... 9 when this roleplay started up? Goodness.  Depending on the exact date, I may not have even known if Bionicle existed.  

I was surprised as well. Poor page is rather neglected...

But yeah, I couldn't even read when it began.

We all had to start somewhere...

What offer?

Unfortunately, all of the Pre-2011 BZPRPG was wiped from history with the Great Dataclysm (Unless some hacker somewhere has it stored). But you can general outline of what happened on the BZPRPG TV Tropes Page and the Old BZPRPG Wiki.

Aside from that, you only have the words of Veterans of the era. Tuck and B6 being the most experienced.

A secret advertising campaign for the Reptilians.

Bear Suits.

IC: (Mons Shajs)

In minutes, more Marines seemed to converge on the area in increasing rapidity. They began to break up the crowd, quietly shifting them to the sidelines, away from the main pathways. Shajs was quite thankful for it, as the last thing they needed was to have a lunatic attack the envoys and begin a war on accident. He himself turned to salute Hanako, and the other officials (He assumed they were). He was near to the ramp, and within speaking distance to the Dasaka.

"Me comrade o'er there isa Cap'n Trieze," he said to them. "Im'a Corporal Mons Shajs, ma'am. I a'na me fella Marines will escort ya inta tha city, befitten' officials of yer status."

IC: (Mons Shajs)

The area around the tube-ship seemed clear, so it seemed to Shajs he would have to work to secure the docks, to keep the foreigners safe. He rowed his boat to the pier, and tied it off next to the nearest ladder. It was clear of the foreign vessel, so he saw it fit to climb up. Looking around, the Ga-Toa (With seemingly Matatus)  were preparing to go on to the pier. Behind him, a crowd of Matoran and Toa had their necks craned in unison at them. Being a Corporal, he had a least a degree of authority over the Privates.

He went on over quickly, and directed four of them to disperse the crowd, to sift them away from the area. And with peaceable means. After which, he came back to the pier, near the ramp the Dasaka were going to exit off. He supposed it would be cordial of him to provide escort. He waited to salute.