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I AM ROB

HELLO YES I AM ROB     ROBROBROBROBROBROBROB   OTHER WORDS YOU CAN MAKE WITH MY NAME ROB   ORB BRO   I AM ORB BRO   OK YES THAT WAS FUN     CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CANADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA     i am ro

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Mass Defect 8: How Gauche

With a mournful cry Wenglestum cradles his fiance's body and vows that he WILL have a funeral (and it's going to be AWESOME. I mean, that wedding budget has to go SOMEWHERE right?)   He's barely placed his beloved's body on the ground when there are MORE things to shoot (which honestly is pretty good, because he's kind of ticked. I mean not only did he lose his first squadmate EVER, but it just happened to be his FIANCE. What are the ODDS?)   Anyhow he walks a bit, shoots a bit, yells at Kaid

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Mass Defect 7: A Wedding and a Funeral?

Being that last entry was totally non-canon and didn't count at all (what, did you actually think it was that easy to get the bad end? NO) let's move on with the amazing adventures of Commander Wenglestum Sparklepants Shepard   After a moment of thinking, Wenglestum has perfect clarity of thought and responds to the Doctor, explaining quite clearly what her job is, and how soldiers get hurt because of reasons. She naturally snaps at him and gets all upset. Jeese, how rude? It's then that Wen

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Mass Defect: Special Edition

Tired after a long day of doing whatever it is that he does aboard his ship, the proud commander Wenglestum retires to his quarters, eager to relax. Logging onto the extranet, he finds information about a new vid. Supposedly based on the hit "Mass Effect" trilogy. Having no idea exactly what that trilogy is about, but being curious nonetheless Wenglestum pays his credits and the vid is streamed directly to his quarters. At this point Wenglestum goes catatonic. The crew discovers him in his

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Mass Defect 6: The Doctor and the Soldier

After a moment of soulsearching Wenglestum has come to the conclusion that he is Commander Wenglestump Sparklepants Shepard. There's no way anyone would or could command him to talk to everyone in the universe! Or at least he hopes that really, really hard.   However it has barely been a moment when he hears two of his underlings talking. Loudly. Like seriously, do they want the whole ship to hear them? Wenglestum rolls his eyes thinking it might be a lovers quarrel before hearing the word

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Mass Defect 5: Passive aggressive for the winz.

Wenglestum has taken a long time to think about his response--about seven days honestly--which kind of begs the question of how/when he: went to the bathroom, ate, slept, showered, trained, brushed his teeth, styled his hair, shaved, and a multitude of other things. But pushing aside those logistical nightmares Wenglestum responds to Joker with such a well-crafted passive aggressive attack that if you hadn't been paying attention you almost would have taken it for genuine concern.   Joker of co

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The Adoption is official

I am taking the briefest of breaks from Mass Defect (plus there's gonna be some changes coming to it anyhow) to announce that my wife Rebecca (Hahli Husky) and I are very proud to announce the adoption of our second child...Micah! He will be joining us and his older brother Yannick in being officially Canadian and also eating delicious pancakes every day.   THAT'S MY BOY.

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Mass Defect 4: You're not very nice, are you?

Our brave commander Wenglestump Sparklepants Shepard has come across two of his squad mates discussing the presence of a Spectre aboard their super shiny new spaceship. Wenglestum, having not had his coffee that morning and being in no mood to hear the ironically named "Joker" spout off conspiracy theories grouchily snapped "Cut the Chatter" and satisfyingly both Kaidan Alenko and Joker did so--until Joker decided to open his fat mouth again and try to talk to the captain to warn him about the

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Mass Defect 3: Your Hero, Ladies and Gentlemen

Ladies and gentlemen--may I introduce you to....     COMMANDER WENGLESTUMP SPARKLEPANTS SHEPARD (Or Wenglestum for short. Because character limits are no fun)       ANYHOW our new found commander is on board the Normandy SR-1, the highest techest piece of space shippery this side of the galaxy. And he hears two PEONS I mean crew members talking about the Spectre aboard their ship. More specifically he hears the navigator talking about how only a fool believes the official story.   HOW WILL

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Mass Defect 2: The Adventures of Commander Wenglestump Sparklepants

What a completely unexpected amount of support on this completely silly idea! THANK YOU GUYS AND GALS.   Anyhow, now that our Shepard is named (the best possible name) and assigned, it's time to decide what he looks like. I will do this in the simplest possible way:   WHAT IS SHEPARD'S RACE: - Asian -Caucasian -African-Canadian (+10 points because my wife wants it)   WHAT IS SHEPARD'S COMPLEXION: - Yes Wrinkles - No Wrinkles - Maybe Wrinkles   DOES SHEPARD HAVE A SCAR: - Yes - No   DOES SHEPAR

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Mass Defect 1

Okay guys, here's the deal. I've been wanting to play Mass Effect again anyhow (especially now that I know that MaleShep is from CAYNADA) but I've been kind of hemming and hawing about it. I mean I already beat ME1 and ME2 using a Femshep and playing a full paragon like I wanted to--but I know there's so much I'm missing.   So here's where you come in!   I will play Mass Effect (and maybe Mass Effect 2) according to your choices. I will leave each entry up for ONE DAY in which you can vote fo

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Micah

Is pretty much one of the greatest people ever. He draws awesome things and he sends awesome presents and I really hope I will see him again this year.   THANK YOU MAN.   So seriously, everyone start talking about how amazing Micah/Kakaru is. Because he's amazing.   (I got a cheerleader and a doofy tennis player, in case you were wondering, Micah)   ALSO WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME TOXIC REAPA HAS A POT BELLY???

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True love

Is turning "We have no idea where we're going" into an hour long adventure.   Love you baby <3

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Gray Morality

So as everyone already knows I've been playing Mass Effect 2. And while for the most part I really enjoy it. I've been having some problems with the choices. Not just the "click something you think Shepard would say only for her to say something completely different, accidentally earn renegade/paragon points" but more specifically with the whole binary system in the first place.   Spoilers to follow. Liek whoa.   Mordin's Loyalty Mission       Legion's Loyalty Mission       Collector Base  

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It wrecked me

If you're one of the few people who hasn't seen Wreck-it Ralph yet--I really can't encourage you enough. I went into it expecting an okay movie filled to the brim with geeky game references that I would enjoy.   What I got was one of the few movies that can make me genuinely tear up. Multiple times.   This movie has so much heart in it, you guys really need to go watch it.

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Decisions

It finally happened to me. I found my Mass Effect Dilemma.   Everyone tells me about their Mass Effect Dilemma, where they didn't know what to choose--and while I know I still have a doozy coming up (I spoiled myself years in advance) I found my first one last night.   I've been completing loyalty quests for fun, and so far I've done: Miranda, Jacob, Jack, and Tali. I was in the middle of Garrus'--or rather at the end.   Spoilers inevitably follow:       And I'm going to be honest I didn't kno

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Please don't be

Okay guys and gals, it's time for something that's near and dear to my heart. Especially with all this acceptance stuff goin' on right now. (which I love, trust me)   So I'ma just lay all this out here. Please don't be a Nice Guy.   Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying don't be nice. But a Nice guy is someone who wants to date someone, but is too afraid of asking them out, so they just be friends--all the while secretly wanting said person, and worse yet expecting said person to reciprocate

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In which we ruin BIONICLE

So Becca and I like to do voices. Stupid voices, the stupidest voices. We also like BIONICLE.   Somehow this ended up with us reading BIONICLE comics (The original ones, you whippersnappers!) in said stupid voices--and for some unearthly reason recording it.   So if you've lost all will to live, read along with us by using this handy-dandy .PDF version of Comic 1   Then click on this link (Or right click and save as, if you're crazy) and let us destroy your feeble mind.

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The Truth behind stuff.

Becca and I have come to the conclusion that Animal Crossing: City Folk takes place within the Capitol.   Also that President Snow only became President because he wanted to be the mayor in Animal Crossing SO BADLY.

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Kohaku!

KOHAKU.   WHAT ARE YOU NOT DOING IN THE CORPSES?  

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One of the best things about Rob ...

... is that he leaves himself logged in to his computer at all times, so I pretty much have free access to his account.   ♥ you, Rob!   - HH   (honestly aside from this, all I really do with his account is fix his spelling and grammar, and edit his profile and then wait until 3 months later when he actually notices)

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Why Rob could never be a video game critic

Rob: I'ma boot up Mass Effect for the first time ever, but all I'ma do is make a character. *Boots up Mass Effect and starts creating Commander Joan Shepard* AN HOUR LATER. Rob: I am satisfied with this thing I do. *Clicks on accept* Rob: WHOA GAME STARTS RIGHT AWAY? Kind of a boring cutscene, though. *First dialogue option comes up* Rob: WHOA THAT WASN'T A CUTSCENE WOW. *Answers first two dialogue options, begins walking down the hall of the Normandy* Rob: OMG BEST GAME EVAR.

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And I can handle way more danger than--

Hey, watch out!   All we can do...is wait for my big brother to come and pffffffhahahaha I can't even finish that   [You’re not really good at this damsel in distress thing.]

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