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Mr. Dzerzhinsky's first Press conference (ask entry)


Scanty Demon

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That's right you read that correctly, today the head of the NKVD will be answering your questions regardless of how stupid they are (for comedic purposes of course). First I must lay down some rules, first there will be no "In soviet Russia" jokes just because I work in the C.C.C.P. doesn't mean you can make jokes about my current residence plus you'll be shot. Second don't ask about the Tsar really, Lenin won't let me talk about him much. So go a head and ask your Cheka leadership any question, and I mean any question.

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My snake friend, my about me section contains no such message. You could interpret it that way but it merely means that a new person has overthrown come to power. That last request of the original person (his name was Eye Beam Lasers) before I sent him into exile was that I keep his original about me section intact. So I crossed out the original and added the Cheka symbol. No political meaning what so ever.

 

OOC: I worked hard on that about me section and didn't want to delete it all. The staff fad crops up and I cross out the about me section to show that "Felix Dzerzhinsky" had taken over. Nothing political came to mind.

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Mm. Sorry for bothering you then. Mostly stems from the fact that if I can't beat people up about politics, then I'm not going to let someone else have that kind of fun. :P

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Why did you send Eye Beam Lasers to Siberia?

 

I would think the Motherland could use that sort of technology.

 

So did we, but then he keep going on and about how this wasn't right, how the revolution was bad, how we didn't treat properly, blah, blah, blah just general complaining. So in order to shut him up we sent him to Siberia. Then I temporarily adopted his identity (didn't make it much a secret I admit) when the staff were infected with Crazystuffinium. He sends me postcards every once in a while, don't think he'll be in Siberia long, so I'm keeping tabs on him.

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:kaukau: While you may be keeping silent about Tsar Nicholas, I was wondering what intelligence you might have gathered regarding the missing Emperor Kraggh.

 

24601

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When will you address rumors about a copy of the fabled Al Azif (AKA Necronomicon) being held in the People's Library?

So that's what that was... I mean such rumors are only that, rumors. I believe that even if we had such it would be very well protected an impossible to get to. I cannot confirm nor deny that we have the book. I shall address the rumors when I feel the time is right.

 

:kaukau: While you may be keeping silent about Tsar Nicholas, I was wondering what intelligence you might have gathered regarding the missing Emperor Kraggh.

 

24601

I cannot say much, what I can say is that we believe the great Emperor Kraggh is hiding in exile. Where, I cannot say as that is quite sensitive information. My only fear is that he may be in contact with Eye Beam Lasers, those two could be a dangerous duo. Also my agent Mr. Powers is still on his trail so this could change.

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Excuse me, Mr. Dzherinsky, but would it be all right if I go around just casually checking the people around me? I do believe there is a spy in our organization. Now, not a good spy like me, mind you that, but one nonetheless.

 

Also, what have we done about that poor sap whom I stole the identity of? JiMing, was it?

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Excuse me, Mr. Dzherinsky, but would it be all right if I go around just casually checking the people around me? I do believe there is a spy in our organization. Now, not a good spy like me, mind you that, but one nonetheless.

Hmm... He or she must be dealt with, I think I'll give the honor of ending our enemy spy's life should you find him or her

 

Also, what have we done about that poor sap whom I stole the identity of? JiMing, was it?

He'll be alright, I made him an offer he couldn't refuse. When I showed JiMing the vacation plan I would send on he was more than eager to go into exile. He sends me postcards every now then, I think I'll send some to you if you would like.

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