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10 Reasons Why Pridak Sucks

Trijhak

Entry posted by Trijhak

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I'm sure that by now, you've seen Pridak's unprecedented level of adoration by his masses of fans who praise him to no end. However, I'm not so sure that most of you know about the TERRIBLE SECRETS Pridak hides in inconspicuous places, such as in plain sight.

  1. Pridak, unlike the other Barraki, doesn't really resembly anything. Mantax looks a bit like a Manta Ray, Ehlek looks like an Eel with limbs, Takadox is a praying mantis for some reason, Kalmah is quite clearly squid-like, and Carapar has a claw and carapace like a crab. Pridak, however, barely resembles a shark, the thing he's supposed to resemble. As a result of this, he was fired by the BIONICLE Story Team in secret, as he had not contorted his body into a shark-like shape enough for their standards. Have you ever seen sharks with a spiky thing going up from their forehead and a spiky thing going down from their chin? I don't think so.
  2. Related to the contorting of bodies, Pridak's waist suffers from being entirely too floppy. The result is Pridak being unable to stay straight in strong winds and strong currents, and a hunched back.
  3. See the red on Pridak's face and blades? We all know it's meant to resemble blood. But it isn't blood. It's red paint. Pridak was dumb enough to paint his mouth and blades permanently red with permanent paint, and also now has lead poisoning. Evidently, Pridak is not a bright lightbulb.
  4. Speaking of Pridak's blades, they're not even effective. They're actually made out of a rubbery material, so even if Pridak wanted to, he would not damage an opponent in the slightest.
  5. Pridak has an expression of permanent awkwardness on his face, and as thus is either permanently awkward to interact with, or cannot display emotions.
  6. Pridak in arrogant and prideful. It's even in his name. Thus, he will underestimate his opponents and instantly lose, maybe even explode as the universe tries to fathom his sheer levels of arrogance.
  7. Pridak stopped being relevant almost a decade ago now, and has failed to become relevant once more. Of all the BIONICLE sharks, Akida is currently significantly more relevant. Pridak also cannot unite with Toa, as he does not believe in however many virtues the denizens of Okoto have. Pridak is also in the completely wrong generation to be relevant.
  8. Pridak got arrested but escaped from a prison called the Pit, and thus he is an escaped convict who is breaking the law. Hydraxon does not like this, and everyone loves Hydraxon.
  9. Pridak once yelled obscenities at you. You might not have heard.
  10. Pridak isn't one of the following: Umarak, Tahu, Akida, Ehlek, Vakama, or Brutaka.
  11. Pridak sucks so much that lists of 10 automatically become lists of 11.

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Hordaki

12. Pridak was the leader of the League of Six Kingdoms, which means that their failure is his fault because reasons.

13. Pridak is so bad that I looked up useless trivia just to prove how awful he is.

14. I added three more reasons because seriously why does he exist.

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Trijhak

First of all, you're wrong. And second, this blog entry is bad.

 

 

First of all, you're wrong, and you're under the control of Pridak and his infernal propaganda, therefore you are even more wrong, so you are effectively wrong * wrong, which is wrong squared, which is at the far end of the wrongability spectrum.

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Paleo

 

2. Related to the contorting of bodies, Pridak's waist suffers from being entirely too floppy. The result is Pridak being unable to stay straight in strong winds and strong currents, and a hunched back.

But he can do the twist.

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Pahrak Model ZX

 

 

2. Related to the contorting of bodies, Pridak's waist suffers from being entirely too floppy. The result is Pridak being unable to stay straight in strong winds and strong currents, and a hunched back.

But he can do the twist.

 

 

Pridak is so awful we won't love him even now that he can dance

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