...a small, adorable animal. However, this creature talked, staving off my driving urge to devour it whole. Something about a quest to save some kingdom or retrieve something... Oh wait, yes, something about retrieving a magical orb of chaos from an evil ruler. The small forest animal pointed torwards a very strange fantasy realm I had not noticed before with its freakish little be-thumbed paws, babbling about my need to pick up a sword from some wizard. So I punted the dimunitive sentient back and forth in the clearing I had found it until it spoke more clearly and led me to the old fart. There, I took the sword, bopped the geezer on the head, and looted his house, against the animal's objections. That is, until I threatened to devour its soul, condemning it to an eternity of evil. Making off with a large amount of magic items, the animal next told me I had to go to some sort of valorous knight academy. I went there, alright, but I consumed their experience in battle, and teleported their heads to an alternate dimension of monkeys while the bodies remained connected... The animal was screaming its head off and until I whacked it across a field, it endlessly raved about something involving 'pure of heart' and then 'OH WHY IN THE WORLD DID I HAVE TO BE THE ADORABLE ANIMAL SIDEKICK FOR THIS ONE?!'... It squeaked something out about traveling to the evil ruler's citadel, which was considerably easy since I apparently arrived before the stereotypical "powerful guards who challenge you to get into the location" creatures got there... Then I confronted the ruler in a fancy showdown... I threw a monkey at him and while he was looking the other way clawing at his face I whacked him over the head with the sword and for good measure threw him out a window. The oppressed townspeople got together for a song-and-dance routine, at which point I assumed the role of ruler and grabbed the orb, and unleashed my horrible hordes of monsters far beyond comprehendable description. And then I laughed at a monkey trying to open a banana the wrong way and ate its soul.

...

There was no point to this whatsoever. I apologize for wasting your time. Or maybe I don't.

School was boring today, anyways. Aside from art, where I got to draw creepy things, and my Social Studies class, where we talked about Julius Caesar and such, it was DULL. I think some knowlegde threw itself out of my head in horror, to be honest...