next week activity should return to normal again, which is a good thing. I really, really want this thing done and over with. The planning of which courses to attend this semester has turned into a big fiasko. as I didn't get some spots in courses I'd like to do or that I need, and of course I had no backup plan, because in previous semesters everything used to work out so well... plus the upcoming exam tomorrow which will go either okay or terribly wrong.
Yesterday I had a complete meltdown because there was a possibility that I would yet not get into another course due to being 6 minutes late because I had managed to get the addresses mixed up. (ironically, it is a course about dealing with conflicts and stuff)
Altogether, things are so scary that I don't even dare to draw into my sketchbook, and instead use some random scrap paper (yes, with a grid... *sigh*) - and then of course things turn out better than expected. But with a sketchbook, the blank page is intimidating, because there's the pressure that I should at least create something decent, worthy of using the 'good' paper. It's all really, really wearing on my nerves, this perma-anxiety that has been going on for the entire past week.
At least I know that things won't stay this miserable, even if it feels very different at the moment.
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