The Round Robin: Approved And Arrived
That's right, it's the first round robin to ever be hosted in this blog! Are you excited? Are you happy? Are you turning cartwheels? (If not, it's okay, I love you anyways.)
Just some really quick guidelines:
1. You can post anywhere over one sentence, unless the sentence is like this:
Then Tahu walked over and picked up a sock and juggled it until he got like super tired and then Kopaka walked over and said "Oh, hey Tahu" and hit Tahu on the head with a pillow Tahu didn't like that so he made oatmeal and threw it at Kopaka who got even madder so they were both all angry and stuff so they threw televisions and toasters at each other and the people who owned those unfortunate electrical appliances got really mad and...
Then... well, be careful about the BZP word limit.
2. Try not to end the story. I mean, if you want to have a crown of winged angel Matoran suddenly fly down with a fanfare of trumpets and remind everyone of this thing called "peaceful existence," I suppose you could, or if you wanted a fifty-foot sock monster to devour the entire Bionicle universe. Just make sure you leave something for the next person to add to.
3. It's not an RPG, so although you could probably introduce your BZP character, anyone who wants can do anything they want to them, even giving them a moustache or standing them on their head on top of a refrigerator. It's a scary thought...
---
A kingdom is in danger. A world is threatened to be overthrown. And a king is very, very angry.
Emperor Tahu Mistika stood on his balcony, the scarf wrapped around his face flapping in the wind. His drawn ninja swords gleamed in the dim daylight. He narrowed his eyes and glared at the cold, blue ice kingdom across the huge field before him.
"The nerve of that Kopaka!" he snarled. "Just 'cause he's got wings and a laser in his eye, he thinks he can beat me? I'll show him!"
A Matoran entered the room, calculated Tahu's mood, judged it to be somewhere perilous to his health, and promptly dived under a box. Tahu stalked over and kicked the box, glaring down as it shook with the Matoran's shudders.
"You! Gather two thousand fully trained and highly lethal Matoran soldiers immediately, and prepare them for battle!"
The Matoran peeked nervously out from under the box. "Uh... Emperor Tahu, sir... we don't even have two thousand Matoran, let alone highly trained and lethal ones. Sir."
"Then gather one thousand and five hundred of the slightly less trained but still equally lethal Matoran fighters!" Tahu barked.
"Half of them are out of practice, sir, and..." The Matoran retreated farther into the box. "And the rest are on vacation. "
"Make it a thousand barely trained and occasionally lucky combatants!"
"Most of them broke up and moved to Louisiana, sir, although some did form a classical band a little while back, sir. Do you think King Kopaka would consider clarinets to be dangerous weapons?"
Tahu paced back and forth in deep thought, then whirled on the Matoran again. "Don't we have anything!?"
"W-well..." The Matoran trembled. "We do have the bacon regiment, sir."
Tahu stood still, weighing the chances of victory with no soldiers at all over the chances of victory using the bacon regiment. Deciding they had a bit more of a chance with at least soldiers of some kind, he sighed. "Gather me three hundred bacon warriors, arm them with frying pans, and be ready to charge at daylight."
"Yes, sir!" The Matoran saluted twice, to get on Tahu's good side, then dashed away.
Tahu turned back to the balcony, ready to begin glaring at Kopaka's kingdom again, when a Ko-Matoran missile jumped, hurled across the room, and rammed into his back, knocking him to the ground and crushing both his dignity and one of his swords.
The Ko-Matoran stood squarely on Tahu's back, holding a spear to his ankle. "The great and almighty frosty king, Kopaka Mistika the First, son of Unknown the twenty-third and brother to the delicate and beautiful Gali Mistika, lone ruler over the entirety of the immense Kopaka Kingdom, acclaimed king over various silences and ellipses patterns, owner of the Frozen Scepter and weilder of the much-sought Freezy-Pop and fro---"
Tahu pressed his hands against his ears.
The Ko-Matoran pried them off. "Frozen ice powers, Sole Heir to the Icy Crystal Jewels and half the stock of Wal-Mart and its prize product, .::Mutran:.~ ~Mutran~ Double-Fun Chewing Gum™, and various..."
"Get to the point!"
The Ko-Matoran, afraid to admit that the heat generating from Tahu's back armor was penetrating his array of courage, cleared his throat. "Kopaka demands you surrender within the next three days, or he shall conquer your kingdom, hypnotize your Matoran, and freeze your 'mighty' flames."
"How could he freeze a flame anyways?" Tahu demanded. "Who does he think he is?"
"I have spoken all that I needed to speak," the Matoran declared, then clicked his heels and marched from the room, leaving Tahu to sulk on the floor.
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