The Oofo Times

7/8/2009

 

BILLY MAYS POSTHUMOUSLY ENDORSES OFFBEAT TEENAGE BLOG

Final attempts to revive a dying career

 

TAMPA – Let’s face it, folks. Since the untimely demise of Billy Mays, famed television spokesman for products such as OxiClean, the writing has been on the wall: his career is rapidly deteriorating.

 

It was in the wake of this tragedy that a representative of Mays announced last week that Billy Mays has, in an unforeseen move, endorsed a teenager’s blog posthumously.

 

Needless to say, the development came as a shock. The blog, dubbed “[0.o],” is hosted on a LEGO toy fan site by a 16 year old boy and often dabbles in the realm of the preposterous, bizarre, and nonsensical. The blog has seen unusual popularity, including one entry that received over 2,000 comments before being locked, though it currently ranks as only the third most-commented-in blog on the website. So why would Mays endorse it—posthumously, no less?

 

“It was a last-ditch move,” his representative admitted yesterday. “Ever since [Mays’] death, his career has been in danger of dying too. We all knew we that something needed to be done.”

 

Evidently, it is all a part of a concerted effort by Mays’ clientele (such as OxiClean, Kaboom!, and the Awesome Auger) to appeal to a younger generation. There is no doubt that these companies will soon see their products advertised in [0.o], a notion that comes as a shock to the website’s administrators.

 

When informed of Mays’ endorsement, the blogger replied, “Who?”

 

Mays and his representatives have made it clear they hope the unusual move will give a much-needed boost to Mays’ career, which has admittedly been in shambles as of late.

 

Such a fact has not gone unnoticed by Vince (“ShamWow”), a competing television salesman. Late-breaking reports now confirm that Vince too is considering endorsing [0.o], coming off the heels of his recent arrest for assault.

 

“If it can save Billy Mays’ dying career, it can save mine,” Vince told reporters.

 

Mays declined to comment on the situation.

 

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