blogs_blog_28

More poetry from you? ^^ Sounds nice I say.

Ooh... Nice, but these lines seemed werid to me:

 

Has a foggy view

In a foggy thank-you

 

Usuing Foggy once then using it again in the next line seems werid to me, maybe if it was like this:

 

Has a foggy view

In a groggy thank-you

 

I think it flows better than foggy because groggy is a vocal word and foggy is. Or maybe I'm insane... *shrugs* Good poem Lady K

 

 

It sounds like a blissful breezy afternoon when dusk falls,

you sit on your front pourch and have a calming bleary dream

'tis a good poemish read.

By the way, nice English color

 

-Jordboy1

I think it flows better than foggy because groggy is a vocal word and foggy is. Or maybe I'm insane... *shrugs* Good poem Lady K

Hmm. I see your point. I wasn't completely sure about it, but I sorta liked the same adjective because it made both parts flow together. I'll think a bit before editing.

 

By the way, nice English color

Yeah; I like the English spelling of colour better.

I think it flows better than foggy because groggy is a vocal word and foggy is. Or maybe I'm insane... *shrugs* Good poem Lady K

Hmm. I see your point. I wasn't completely sure about it, but I sorta liked the same adjective because it made both parts flow together. I'll think a bit before editing.

 

By the way, nice English color

Yeah; I like the English spelling of colour better.

 

That's cool.

I used to make reference to that kinda thing in my old comedy.

Except I used center and centre.

 

-Jordboy1

Wow, very good. It manages to have a delightful, chantlike rhythm without adhering to any one meter, which is good (I probably constrain myself too much by pretty much only writing sonnets).