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Kaleidoscope Tekulo

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Blog Entries posted by Kaleidoscope Tekulo

  2. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    ...wearing my Santa Scarf hat, skull moon Halloween shirt and my summer shorts and I ate Thanksgiving leftovers for brunch.
     
    America's a funny place (or maybe it's just me).
     
    "Count Lionel! What's he doing here?"
     
    ~The Duchess Approves
  4. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Does anyone want a Scyther with Technician?
     
    I have like a box full of them and I kinda just want them gone. I already have a Scizor with that ability, and it has come in handy so many times for Legendary Hunting.
     
    They're all lvl 1.
    Friend Code: 1590-5239-4085
     
    Also, I have shinies up for trade.
     
    Zoroark lvl 60
    Porygon Z lvl 50
    Haxorus lvl 60
    Raikou lvl 50
    Rayquaza lvl 70
    Munna lvl 15
    Meowstic (male) lvl 61
     
    Shiny for Shiny.
     
    GET OFF MY LAWN!
    ~Tekulo <3
  5. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So, after I did some research on the subject, I found a few different dango recipes. Dango, for any uncertain as to what I am talking about, is a sweet dumpling snack/dessert made out of rice flour, and typically served with tea. Some recipes called for tofu, others were just special forms of rice flour and water, etc. Eventually I came across a recipe online that seemed simple and had a step-by-step video.
     

     
    It didn't turn out half bad. It should be noted that I didn't find every exact ingredient for this recipe. I used a few variations as I live in America, and unfortunately I don't live in Pittsburgh near Lotus Foods anymore (a really cool market for Asian foods).
     
    Sticky Rice Powder - I just used plain old white rice flour. It's all I could find (And I didn't find any at Walmart. Normally I would've used the brand with the red text and the pegasus on the bag. Instead I went to Heinins and got Red Mill brand. It's a bit on the pricey side, so if you want to try to make this yourself look for the cheaper alternative first).
     
    Sugar - In this video, though it doesn't specify, it looks like it uses raw sugar instead of white sugar. Really it shouldn't make too much of a difference, but I used white sugar in my recipe.
     
    Green Tea Powder - it was pretty difficult for me to find the right tea to use. I didn't find any instant powder by itself, unfortunately. I substituted a green tea mix which used green tea powder as the main ingredient (which sounds easy, but there was only one brand I found at Walmart, which was 4C brand. It's sweetened with honey and splenda, so this made the green dango really sweet, but also more flavorful. I wouldn't say they were overly sweet, but when consuming dango with tea, I would prefer it to be toned down). Other recipes I've seen have this ingredient replaced with green food coloring, which would probably be the better alternative for those who can't find plain green tea powder.
     
    Tofu - This video didn't specify the type of tofu to use, but it should be noted I used soft tofu instead of firm tofu.
     
    This type of dango with three colors is apparently called Hanari Dango.
     
    ----------------
     
    Now, while I made this dough for all of the dango I made at home, I also tried to make Mitarashi Dango. Basically for this type of dango, I left the dough plain with no food coloring or tea mix.
     
    I made a simple sauce for it from this video here at 2:42
     
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5h7o6p2os4
     
    Red Mill also makes potato starch, so for this sauce I had all of the ingredients needed.
     
    While the person in this video over-cooked their sauce, I managed to get it to a proper consistency.
     
    PRO TIP: When thickening with potato starch, the sauce does not need to come to a boil in order to thicken (unlike with corn starch where the starch must be dissolved in water before-hand and then brought to a boil). This sauce's ingredients can be combined all at once, mixed, and then brought to the stove. As for how not to kill your sauce, be sure to remove it from heat right when the sauce begins to thicken. Don't worry if you think it looks a bit too runny. Because this sauce is cooked in such a small amount, the residual heat from the pan will continue to thicken the sauce after the pan has been removed from the heat. It's actually a pretty important step, so if anyone here dares to try this, keep this in mind.
     
    ------------
     
    It also should be noted that after the dango were removed from the boiler, I placed them in an ice-bath to cool for five minutes (as suggested in the second video). The outsides did seem a bit moist, so I would recommend allowing them to air-dry on a plate with a paper towel underneath (or just allow them to cool on their own instead. I just thought the ice-bath was a faster method).
     
    The tea I made to pair with these was green tea. I found a brand that only used green tea leaves in the ingredients list, and instead of pouring hot water over the tea bags, I instead ripped the bags open and boiled the tea leaves with the water in a tea pot. It gives the tea more flavor, in my opinion. I also strained the leaves out with a small fine-mesh strainer as I poured the tea into my mug.
     
    Thoughts on the two types of dango I made:
     
    Hanari Dango: As for how everything turned out - it was yummy, but plain. Don't get me wrong, it was an enjoyable treat coupled with the green tea I made. However, the dango on their own do taste plain (aside from the green ones as previously mentioned). I wouldn't mind trying to make something similar to this kind of dango again, but I would like to try making it with some other flavoring such as vanilla or lemon zest. They're not bad, but they don't have much flavor. It's a nice compliment to tea, though, so for anyone who loves a good cup of tea, but doesn't want an overpowering snack to go with it; I would recommend this form of dango.
     
    Mitarashi Dango: I prefered this dango to the Hanari. The dango themselves are plain, however the sauce compliments it nicely giving it a nice soy sauce flavor. Again, the sauce itself isn't overly sweet, so it also pairs nicely with tea in my opinion.
     
    Overall thoughts: For anyone with a sweet tooth, dango isn't for you (at least not these recipes anyway). They are, however, filling (I only ate six dango [two skewers] before I was beginning to fill up). Also, if you don't have/want skewers, you can use chopsticks instead. It might not be as elegant, but it does work for holding three dango in place.
     
    As for me, I still have tofu, rice flour and potato starch left over, so I'll probably make these again (and maybe alter the recipe a bit for flavoring experimentation).
     
    GET OFF MY LAWN!
     
    ~Tekulo <3
  6. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So, I decided that this October I'll be getting Pokemon X because I love Pokemon Games and this one is looking pretty fantastic so far.
     
    I've decided I'll want to raise a Sylveon (because Eevee is my favorite pokemon ever and I love all of the eeveelutions), a Talonflame (for sky battles and the fact that it's a normal flying type with a second type attached. I think that's pretty sweet), a Gogoat (because Gogoat's concept is awesome), a Clauncher (it looks awesome) and most likely a Flabebe (Flower Sprite Pokemon? YES!).
     
    Anyway, I'll also probably name them after Fairy Tale characters due to my obsession with Grimm and Andersen works. Talonflame is so going to be a name from The Juniper Tree.
     
    Anyway, due to my pokemon decisions above, I already have each starter type covered. Not only that, but I actually do like all of the initial designs for each starter pokemon. Yes, even Froakie. I didn't like it at first, but the little guy's grown on me. Chespin is awesome, Fennekin is a Fennec fox pokemon (awesome) and water starters are some of my favorites in battle (though I do love the grass type for their designs and concepts).
     
    So, yeah. I'm torn. I have no idea which one to choose...
  10. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So I now have a Miru made out of ink on my left foot.
     
    BEHOLD THE MAJESTY!
     
    This is the best work of art ever and anyone who says otherwise does not appreciate the finer things in life.
     
    And, yes, before you ask "omg did this doofus seriously do this?" I will confirm that, yes, this was done with the most permanent of Sharpie marker. It will be there for at least a week.
     
    This plan sucks
    ~Lapis <3
     
    Update: MOSTLY COLORED IN: BEHOLD MORE MAJESTY
  11. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Nothing like replaying some of your favorite games after so many years.
     
    The thing I love most about this series is that it's so unbelievably epic with a great, detailed cast of characters with their own individual quirks, interesting bad guys with elaborate and tedious plots and is so entertaining on the whole; and the only way I can describe it to an average joe is "So basically you play as a lawyer and defend people in court."
     
    I always get so many odd looks when I say that.
     
    Hah hah hah... I feel forever ashamed of my own choice of words sometimes... ''-_-
     
    ANYWAY so I forgot how much I hate/love Miles Edgeworth's character. The first game he's at his worst, but starts on his path to his best (and fails miserably with a Whooooooooop!). In later games (Ace Attorney Investigations which I really loved [despite the boss making my video game life oh-so-ever-tedious]) he really shines and I love how classy he is. Still, I do admit he doesn't have as much class as Professor Layton in my opinion.
     
    Larry Butz is probably my favorite character in the first game. He's just a regular guy who finds himself in the center of bad luck, but he's always got a lively personality (both good and bad) that just makes me laugh every time he shows up.
     
    Maya is also a very fun character, but I start to like her even more later on in the series. She's so goofy and doesn't always know what she's talking about, but at the same time she has a good heart. Actually, I'd say she's the pinacle of goodness in any of the games. No matter what the story puts in her way, she always comes out smiling and that's just really awesome.
     
    So, I could go on and on about every character in the series, so I'll just stop before this becomes a really long entry.
     
    GET OUT OF MY COURTROOM!
    ~Tekulo <3
  12. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So I got a shiny new display case for some of my favorite minifigs. This is pretty much just an attempt to organize some of the tragic piles of plastic that have become my LEGO collection over the years.
     
    So, I figure I'll try and describe my personal bios for these characters. Most of these are customized figures I've built from random figs and the build your own minifigures from the LEGO store.
     
    Starting from the top row from the left and going to the right: Here we have a special minifigure that was a promotional item from the LEGO shop at home site. I like to think of him as a personal assistant to help with the general chaos that is my life. (Having a plastic figure as an assistant is not very practical as all he does is smile and look pretty, but it's an unpaid position so I guess that's fine).
     
    Next we have a lovely mermaid. I have given her no backstory, nor a name. She just stands there in limbo, forever living in an existential crisis and longing for an identity.
     
    Now here we have Samantha and SAMANTHA. Samantha is an undercover agent for some sort of secret organization. Her specialty is disguise and infiltration. She has a variety of outfits and accessories to blend into the background. Her talents are normally used to gather information. As for what kind of information, idk I did not plan that far into what her organization even does. They don't even have a mission statement. Paired with her is a famous 2x2 LEGO brick whose whereabouts I always enquire about. She's a robot used as a deus ex machina of sorts. The name stands for
    Some
    Acronym
    Meaning
    A
    Nano-
    Tech
    Hybrid
    Amalgamation
     
    One of my personal favorites, we have Lilura Philyra. Lil is a witch without a voice. Whether she is incapable of speech or whether she simply refuses to speak is a mystery. She lost her family to witch hunts at a young age and studied magic as an apprentice to a capable master of the magical arts. She can often be found playing a melancholy tune on a harp.
     
    Next to her we have a Pride figure with no name. I honestly don't have a backstory for this gal here, and that's a shame because I really love her design.
     
    And here we have two boyfriends. I know nothing about them other than the fact that they are dating because I crave seeing gay dudes in stories. I did have a weird backstory made for one of them, involving power, betrayal and a convenient amnesia, but that's all very convoluted and will likely be scrapped from my personal canon.
     
    And now we have some sort of villain. Once again, no real backstory, but just look at him. He's dressed all fancy and has such a dapper little grin on his face. You just know he's up to no good with that bowler hat.
     
    And finally, finishing the top row we have another Shop at Home figure. I got two of the figures from the promotion (the first minifig on the far left) so I tried to see if I could recreate the female minifig found on the Shop at Home site.
     
    Now to list off the bottom row of figures starting with the leftmost side.
     
    Here we have Miss Cat and her two kittens. To be honest, they only got this spot because they are cats and cats are adorable.
     
    Next we have my version of Elsa from Frozen. The only problem I really have with her is that she is wearing gloves.
     
    These two are the Star Sisters. They are members of a sinister organization known as Skull Flower. Based in the city, they struggle with the choice of remaining in a criminal organization while trying their best to work towards a normal life.
     
    Jack and Megan are the two minifigs I decided to use in my epic, Light and Shadow. I have no clue if I will ever finish it, honestly. These two are from my childhood days way back when. Megan was a superhero with all of the powers of a PowerPuff girl and Jack was an afterthought side character. He's Megan's husband and a firefighter. They're madly in love (unlike in the epic where they're currently just partners in saving the world). Jack originally had no powers of his own. They have a son named Jack Jr who is an intelligent engineer who designed a robotic suit to help him fight crime. Basically Iron Man before I knew what Iron Man even was. Megan was always my protagonist in the LEGO world. I've played with the idea of making her a trans woman. Having her be a member of the LGBT community makes her feel a little closer to me (even though it's a part of the community that I'm not a member of).
     
    Next up is this weirdo guy. He's the leader of Skull Flower, a sinister organization whose mission statement is currently unknown. Idk what he's planning, but just look at that gun he has. Why do I even have guns in my LEGO world? Oh geez, I'm scared. I'm not sure how he lost his leg. He'd probably like to know that along with whatever the heck his name is. Nice mowhawk though.
     
    Here we have Professor Layton and Luke Triton from the Professor Layton series. I got super into these games and one day I was like OMG I CAN TOTALLY MAKE THESE GUYS OUT OF LEGO. Too bad I don't have Emmy Altava. I can only assume they've been trying to unravel the mysteries of my LEGO collection. Maybe they've found some answers like what it is all these secret organizations want to do and why they even exist in the first place?
     
    This is Little Red Riding Hood all grown up because I am a sucker for fairy tales and I will never be free from their icy hold over my life.
     
    And finally here we have some random Spartan who is a blindbag Megablocks figure. He crash landed in the LEGO universe and is trying to figure out what the heck is going on and how to return home. Unfortunately he is stuck in my collection forever, an outsider who can never fit in and the worst at disguising himself to blend in. Will he ever find love???
     
    So yeah, these are the zany characters that make up my pride parade LEGO.
  13. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    My brother Kopaka Kurahk will be visiting... He'll be here tomorrow...
     
    And worse.
     
    He has backup... After about three days of weakening my defenses, Akano: Toa of Electricity will arrive to finish the job...
     
    I... I don't have much time... D'=
     
    It's been so wonderful knowing all of you... Before I go, I just want to say-
     
    GET OFF MY LAWN!
    ~Tekulo <3
  14. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So, I was on BZP today and I noticed I had new-found powers.
     
    Something to do with levitation and shooting fire from my fingertips. After finding this to be quite odd, I then noticed I could start a blog finally. ^^
     
    Well, I hope to put up a set review in due time here and hopefully you guys will enjoy reading. ^^
  16. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Reading the same story over-and-over gets boring after a while. I guess that's why I'm not into really mainstream things like Doctor Who or Glee (ugh, I hate that show), Lady Gaga or Harry Potter. I guess that's why I like to read, see and hear other things like Baccano and The Looking Glass (Brandy, you're a fine girl indeed. ^^), Princess Tutu, Cat Laughing Last and it may play a role in why I'm still a member on this site.
     
    I'm not saying the popular stories are boring... It's just... well, thinking about it there are several fans of the popular things. It's not uncommon to find a fan of Lord of the Rings or someone who worships Star Wars or Star Trek. It might sound hipster of me to say, but because those stories are so popular they have thousands of people who share common threads. In other words, people share something more in common and it becomes a "norm." It boggles my mind a bit to think so many people could have something like that in common sometimes. It's like they're one small step closer to being the same human, however small the trait they share turns out to be.
     
    Consider life to be a story; a story is interesting with the events that take place and the philosophy tied in, respectively. In the mainstream world, hearing the same songs over and over again and seeing the same stories unfold gets a bit... dull, I suppose. Once not long ago I worked at an office where co-workers would play the radio every day for eight hours. Now, where I worked there were around six to seven people working together depending who had the shift that day. One of the employees, when she could have her way, would play a radio station that exclusively played songs including "Moves Like Jagger," "Firework" and other mundane garbage. Though, to be fair, they did also play Adel... once every few hours... Those were the only good songs on the station in my opinion. The radio station, only sporting around a total of ten or so songs, would repeat day after day after day. In other words; I was listening to the same music time and time again. Although I did enjoy a few songs, I would have preferred more variety.
     
    Looking at popular culture as a whole, I suppose I view mainstream entertainment as I do that radio: I don't deny that the stories have potential and that I could easily enjoy them. I just prefer to have the many, many existing fans to have their fun in my stead. One less Doctor Who fan isn't going to kill anyone. Oddly enough, I have received some backlash for this way of thinking, however. I was in conversation with a group of my peers once, and I mentioned that I didn't like Lady Gaga. It was then I was attacked with the question "Well, what do you listen to then?!" to which I replied "video game music" as I had been listening to a lot of remixes at the time. The reply was "You're going to limit yourself to that?" The funny thing was, I thought they were limiting themselves to Lady Gaga. XD
     
    There was also another incident where one of our older peers (a very kind woman and a great friend) mentioned to the younger generation that she had not read, and didn't intend, to read the Harry Potter series. Like a pack of wolves everyone in the room seemed to pounce for the kill, bombarding her with "OMG, Y U NO READ THE BOOKS?!" and "WHAT?!" the tone was along the lines of blasphemy for just not following the crowd. I chimed in and said that I too had no intention of finishing the series past book four (the last book I'd read as a kid). They seemed to grumble to themselves and quiet down. I was just thankful that they stopped with their prejudice (and over something as trivial as a book series no less XD).
     
    So, I suppose that's why I'm not into Stargate or The Avengers and why I have little interest in Batman movies or other things of the sort. There's already quite a following for those titles, and I've heard of those stories before. What catches my eye, when I walk into the store, are strange things I've yet to see. I love being strange and learning new things. I suppose I've seen a Harry Potter fan before, and I have met Lady Gaga fans before. It isn't every day I meet someone else who likes Erik Satie or Dancing in the Moonlight or Princess Tutu or Rin. I love people that I think are interesting and I prefer it if everyone could expand their horizons a bit and let other things define them. Complexity is a wonderful thing, and I just wish people could see the full spectrum of light instead of the shades of gray in the world.
  17. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    What's in your left pocket?!
     
    Trainer Tekulo wants to battle!
     
    Friend Code: 1590-5239-4085
     
    I'll be playing Omega Ruby today. I'm not using legendaries.
     
    GET OFF MY LAWN!
    ~Tekulo <3
  18. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    Sometimes...

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    Sometimes I feel like the world needs more feline leaders.
     
    And then I remember what the world is really like.
     
    And then things are sad.
     
    =\
     
    (One of these days I will use my blog for important things. Today is not that day)
  19. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    Meat

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    So, for my New Year's resolution, I decided that I would order only Vegetarian or Vegan options when eating out. Last night I ordered pasta with sautee'd mushrooms. When my food came out, they gave me pasta with meatballs.
     
    Now, when this happens I don't send the food back because then the establishment usually tosses the food out. When that happens with meat, to me it feels like the animal got killed just to wind up in the garbage (not to mention it's pretty darn wasteful). So, I didn't say anything and started eating a few bites of pasta.
     
    Little did I expect, the waitress caught the mistake and brought me pasta with the mushrooms. They still offered me the pasta with meatballs, as they said they were just going to throw it out. I told them I would take it to go.
     
    So, apparently when the food was brought back to the kitchen, tragedy struck. Someone was high fiving someone else, and when they brought their hand down, it landed in the pasta with meatballs. Sauce apparently splashed over three people. Contaminated, the establishment tossed it out.
     
    So, yeah... Life is meaningless.
     
    GET OFF MY LAWN!
    ~Tekulo <3
  20. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
     
    Edit:  Still alive here.
     
    Sorry for the screaming, I just remembered the blogs exist this morning and I only had a minute before I started work to make an entry for old times sake.  Given the short time I had, I feel it was good.  
     
    Anyway, uhhhhhhhh stuff has been happening.  I got a job, quit that job and then got another job.  The second job seems good so far.  I actually get to take breaks this time lol.  
     
    Anyway, how has everyone been?
  21. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    Pride

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    Hey everyone! Been a while.
     
    Life's been keeping me busy with work, walks, family visiting, the occasional (very occasional) trip to Seattle and procrastination on things that are important that I should be doing right now. I got about... five(?) hours of sleep last night and I'm at the end of my day so boy howdy that is a thing. XP (meanwhile someone out there reading this is on no sleep for the past three days and is screaming at their computer screen right now).
     
    There's a lot I could put in a life update entry, and I might just get around to that at a later time. Right now, I want to talk a bit about pride month.
     
    So yesterday I watched a candlelight vigil for the victims of a certain incident (which idk if I can talk specifically about here). But yeah... hearing multiple names and ages of victims being called out and realizing you fall into the same minority and age group is... sure a strange feeling. I've had people tell me that these are just isolated incidents and that it's not going to happen to me, to stop stressing out, but... hehehe it's not like anyone can predict the future and honestly the world is a wild place. News about violence against LGBT people is always a hard truth to face. Well, for me it is anyway.
     
    BUT ANYWAY ONTO LESS DEPRESSING SHENANIGANS!
     
    So, a while ago I started identifying as genderqueer. That was because I had no better term to describe my gender identity, really. I've talked a bit about it on here before. Well, recently I learned about demigenders. I looked up the definition of demigirl and I kinda realized that was closest to describing how I personally identify. After I read the definition, really read it, I kinda stopped for a second and... you know how you follow a really good mystery story? Like right towards the end when everything starts to come together and make sense and you see the solution at the end of it, you get like these goosebumps and a strange sense of excitement and trepidation? That's how I felt when I realized this was describing me. Genderqueer had always been a bit of a vague shrug for me. It's nice having a more precise label imo.
     
    So, for those not aware, demigirl is a gender identity where someone identifies partially as female, but not completely. For some people they identify as primarily female and partly as something else, but not always.
     
    Personally I don't think I feel physical dysphoria, or at least not to the point where I'd want to undergo hrt.
     
    So, what does this mean for me? Well, it means I'm the same person I always was. Now I just have a label for myself that I feel comfortable with. And actually, for me it's a relief. Even if a lot of people aren't going to understand me with my gender identity, just knowing that there are other people out there that identify in similar ways to me... it's comforting to know I'm not the freak I told myself I was growing up. I know I'm not cis and I'm not in the majority or anything, but... I dunno, I feel more like a normal human being now than I have in years (and this after I've dyed my hair, worn cute necklaces, got my ears pierced and went through all these little things that guys just didn't do where I grew up).
     
    I'm still good with he/him pronouns btw. I'm generally okay with feminine pronouns and things too, provided they aren't used as a means to ridicule me through misgendering (i.e. calling me a girl in a way meant as a demeaning insult. Yes, people still do this, and no it isn't funny. Hasn't been funny to me for a while now tbh).
     
    So yeah. Demigirl, demihomosexual and very tired from a long day of work and a long many years of trying to figure all of this out.
     
    This is who I am.
     
    Happy Pride Month! <3
    ~Tekulo
  22. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Yeah, I know I want to blog about something, but I totally can't remember what it is.
     
    So, while I remember, let me tell you a story.
     
    I forget what the story is.
     
    Okay, so all of that aside, I suppose I could talk about my vacation with Akano and KK.
     
    We saw stuff, did stuff, had some delicious gelato, went to the lego store and got the Palace Cinema (well, I did anyway), and I haggled with Akano over Lego sets.
     
    I ended up getting a Lego Iron man minifig for free with my purchase at the Lego store (Well, I ended up getting two, but this was before I got the second. I wanted to trade him away because I'm not a Superhero fan at all except for Batman because his story is literally the only one that makes any bit of relatable sense to me in any way, but I'm getting off topic). So, I traded my first Iron Man away for the LEGO Set DJ Pirate Fez Crab. The fact that this is not an actual Lego Set makes me question the sanity of LEGO's set creators. Basically I got the better end of the deal because DJ Pirates are cool enough, but one with a fez who is also a crab? Best. Figure. Ever.
     
    Anyway, I also managed to build the Palace Cinema over the span of two nights before it was time to leave. It is amazing and I love it so much. <3 It's my first really big set that I've ever gotten, so I'm super excited. I'll probably make a quick review sometime if anyone's interested.
     
    Anyway, I think that's pretty much it.
     
    I don't think I covered what I originally wanted to blog about...
     
    What did I want to tell them, Billy?
     
    You don't know?! Well then...
     
    GET OFF MY LAWN!
     
    ~Tekulo <3
  23. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    Lately I have noticed that I'm not particularly fond of too many shows on television. By this I'm specifically talking about sitcoms be them Seinfeld, How I Met Your Mother, Modern Family, The Big Bang Theory, and so on. Sitcoms are a type of show that I've watched for most of my life. I've gotten into a few of them, and I've generally enjoyed them over the years. But recently, I've grown tired of seeing one too many episodes of Big Bang Theory and Modern Family and I started to stop and think. It's fun to watch a show when I'm not thinking. I get to experience the jokes and playful humor without a second thought. And hey, the first two to three times watching an episode, things are generally funny. But then I stopped to look at these episodes and I realize something. I feel like these shows were not made for me.
     
    Let me try to explain myself a little here. Currently I am a twenty five year old man who has found work off and on as a baker. I define my sexual orientation as demi-homosexual and I define my gender identity as gender queer. I've lived my entire life overweight and my self esteem is generally on the low side. I have suffered from depression and anxiety among other things. I tend to let my emotions get in the way of seeing the world for what it really is at times, and I have to remind myself that I don't even know what this world is like to begin with. I often remind myself that the place I'm currently in, both emotionally and physically is... well, for lack of a better word, weird. I'm not sure there was ever a day beyond fifth grade that I ever felt normal, but I think I've probably mentioned this on my blog more than a few times in various entries.
     
    I suppose I could start with the obvious here and point out that while I'm not straight, most sitcoms revolve around straight men. These are characters that pursue relationships without a second thought. Ted Mosby on HIMYM seemed to date a fair number of women while searching for his one true love. Even if I were to ignore the fact that these relationships are heteronormative, this is something I personally find unrelatable. The very idea of me being comfortable enough to pursue even a casual relationship with someone else may as well be a work of fantasy. It's a bit of a strange feeling to be detached from a show's everyman on that level alone.
     
    Well then what about a show that actually has two men in a relationship? It is true that Modern Family has this, and these characters Mitchell and Cameron don't seem to have dated as much as say Jerry Seinfeld or Ted Mosby (Or Ross and Joey from Friends). They are two men in a serious relationship from the start with an adoptive daughter starting a family and a life together. Before I start complaining about these two, let me just say that to me this is a significant step forward in media and growing up I honestly never thought I would see anything like this in a television show. Love between men is something very hard to come by from what I've seen, and with anything like this I feel that in a way it's huge without really being anything all that tremendous at all. That being said, I personally don't see myself being represented much in either of these characters.
     
    Let me elaborate a little bit. It's true I am not in a relationship, serious or otherwise, and it is true I don't have an adoptive daughter and I am by no means starting a family myself. But let's put all of that aside for now and talk about why I don't relate to two characters on television who are gay, like me. For this I will start with Cameron. Cameron is generally, in my opinion, a walking, talking stereotype of what straight people think all gay people are like. Overly feminine, prone to drama, a love of arts and crafts with a sense of style and body language that is, generally speaking, flamboyant. As a demi-sexual and even gender queer individual (who tends to score as more feminine than masculine on gender identity quizzes) I can't help but watch this character and scream in my head "THIS IS NOT WHAT I'M LIKE." To me personally there is nothing quite so disheartening as to see a gay character on television that does not in any way represent anything that I am or anything that I stand for. For example, Cameron decides to come out to his grandmother (who is a bigot) that he is in love with Mitchell, has a daughter and a family and is going to get married. His grandmother responds with a close minded statement (accusing their identities as gay men to be the cause of a storm of all things) and Cameron's reaction? He's just glad his grandmother ultimately agreed to attend their wedding (in spite of Mitchell pointing out that she is bringing a sign and protesting gay marriage). Cameron shows no remorse that this family member will not accept him. He goes on without a care in the world, and honestly this is the scene that makes my stomach flip every time. I spent most of my life being closeted from my family, I have worried for years about whether or not I would be accepted (and, hey, even though I'm out of the closet I still struggle with this with my parents). This is something that to me is a huge deal. It's something that impacts my relationship with my family to this day and it's something I find utterly disgusting that people like me have to deal with because it is disgusting. This exchange to me feels like something out of a bad fantasy. It strikes me as totally unrealistic and it is why I hate his character for his carefree attitude towards bigotry. Granted his character has been about breaking the mold and not conforming to certain stereotypes, but this scene is something that I personally will never accept.
     
    Now then, let's talk about Mitchell. While neither of these characters truly captures what it's like to deal with homophobia in the modern day in my opinion, Mitchell does have his moments. Namely the relationship Mitchell has with his father. He talks about being closeted to his dad up until college when he finally built up enough courage to tell his father Jay that he is gay. According to Mitchell, his father used to call him every week or so when he was away at college to catch up. However, after he came out to Jay, those phone calls stopped. Mitchell is clearly upset about this and honestly this is another scene that sticks out to me. This is the only moment that his character feels real to me. This is the one scene in the entire show where I feel like I can even remotely relate to his character. I've been there. I am there now. Granted my relationship with my parents isn't the same as Mitchell's relationship to his father, but I often feel like my family just doesn't understand what it's like to be in my position. Sometimes they say things without thought and I get hurt because of it. It happens.
     
    Despite this one scene, however, I largely feel that these two characters do not relate to me. And that is shame considering, well, I thought they would. Both of them follow designers, be it a white couch or a decorative glass bowl, they seem to be into trendy, upscale material possessions. Meanwhile, I may spend some time planning my outfits, but I'm about as fashionable as a rock, honestly. I don't keep up with trendy things, and unless it's plating a dessert at the end of a five course dinner, I don't have much of an eye for style or the finer things in life. At one point, while their friend Pepper Saltsman plans their wedding, his assistant says at one point that planning a gay wedding is much more difficult than a heteronormative wedding because both grooms have such high standards. And um, again, THAT'S NOT WHAT I'M LIKE. When I'm watching characters like this, characters that are supposed to represent people like me, I can't help but feel that this was not intended to cater to me. This was intended to cater to people who think this is what I'm actually like. It feels isolating and on some level lonelier than I could have ever imagined.
     
    Well, this entry has gone on for quite a few paragraphs. While I could go on, I feel like I've at least covered the gist of things. Keep in mind, these are my opinions and my opinions alone. Not every gender queer gay dude thinks the same, and I fully expect there are going to be people to disagree with me. But these are just opinions from someone who never really felt like he fit in to begin with.
  24. Kaleidoscope Tekulo

    Depression

    By Kaleidoscope Tekulo,

    Please listen to someone.
     
    Don't expect for them to come to you with their problems.
     
    Be open, be chill, and don't try to solve every single problem or try to dominate them by saying "you shouldn't feel that way."
     
    Be approachable, stop being so judgemental, stop playing those stupid "I'm smarter and you're an idiot" games. Don't carry an air of superiority.
     
    Consider others' feelings seriously. Don't write them off as "oh, they're just being like..." or whatever.
     
    It's different for everyone, but those were the things preventing me from talking with a lot of people, including my own family, about my condition. I did have people I did talk to, and I'm doing fine now, but I feel like only telling the people with depression to "talk to someone" is only half of the issue sometimes. It can be a lot harder than you think.
     
    Be someone worth talking to.
  25. Kaleidoscope Tekulo
    So, just to update a few things.
     
    We also know the author's first initial is F. Old Man McGucket's first name is Fiddleford.
     
    Also, while I saw a left hand on the front of the journals, my brother Akano pointed out that the symbol is just an outline and that there is no way to tell if the palm of the hand is facing the cover or the journal or not. Basically this means that the symbol could depict either hand, right or left.
     
    How can we find proof? The six-fingered glove Grunkle Stan put on was for his right hand. Those types of gloves normally aren't ambidexterous. We don't know for sure whether the author only had six fingers on one hand or not, but if it was only one hand, my money of where the extra finger is located is the right hand. Old Man McGucket has his right hand bandaged to his knuckles, and when viewed from the side it looks completely covered along the side.
     
    Theory: The author lost his extra finger somehow and then wrote in the journals. I have a feeling Bill had something to do with it. Proof of this is the bloodstains in journal 3 on Bill Cipher's page.
     
    Granted, none of this evidence proves without a shadow of a doubt that Old Man McGucket is the author, but at this point I'd say it's somewhat likely. The identity of the author could still be someone we have yet been introduced to.
     
    Also, more on the identity of Stan's sibling. Dipper, Mabel and Stan all share the last name Pines. This means his sibling was likely male as Stan is from an older generation where typically the man's last name became the family name. If this is true, then the twin theory seems to hold some merit. It's possible. Some people think the young Stan poking his head out of the Mystery Shack was actually his twin brother (in Time Traveler's Pig). It's interesting.
     
    Another recurring theme in Gravity Falls is the year 1982. This takes place in the summer of 2012 meaning that 1982 was thirty years ago. The old room in the shack that held the body-swapping rug was not touched in many years. Behind the door, there is a calendar of July 1982 present. My theory is that the Shack belonged to the author previously. What's also interesting is that below the calendar on an end table, there is a pair of glasses. These glasses are on Bill's wheel. The author's notes on the wheel have these glasses circled with three exclaimation points pointing at them.
     
    I don't think these represent the author, as the six-fingered hand was also on that wheel. In fact, if he'd just recognized the symbol, then why not point those exclamation marks to his own symbol as well? I think the glasses belong to someone the author knew personally, someone he knew well enough that they would leave their glasses in his home. Someone he wasn't expecting to be involved in all of the weirdness of Gravity Falls. I think this might play a role in three words that were written down in the journal.
     
    Trust no one.
     
    MUAHAHAHAHA!
     
    ~Melon Lord
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