So I started another blarghsoapbox the other day. What a disaster.

Well, not really. I'm actually quite pleased, on the one hand. But yeah.

I'm supposed to use that one as an outlet for my Really Serious And Hard Hitting Thoughts, as opposed to the "BZPower-friendly" stuff. <--- False dichotomy, but that's words for ya. They'll trap you every time.

And speaking of traps... I tell you, I'm an expert at setting them up and then walking right into them. Although "expertise" is hardly the word for a pattern that manifests perfectly well without my conscious intent. So what's the trap this time? Oh, only the same one I tangle with every day:

Ego.

An inflated sense of self-importance. The audacity to think I have anything to offer that's special in any way, that doesn't just regurgitate what I've managed to haphazardly pick up from others who are far more diligent, devoted, eloquent, intelligent, informed, discerning, aware, advanced, and experienced than myself.

And that's another lie. The old one-two. Swing you back from the high to the low, self-importance to self-pity. "I can't do anything special or worthwhile. I suck!"

The only antidote is a big, healthy double dose of Detached Objectivity and Humility. That and some medication XD meditation will work wonders.

Write what you know, they say. Well, I've got a problem right there: I don't know a whole lot. I've got a bunch of info in my brain, sure - but how much of it is integrated into my being through the alchemical processes of choice-consequence and belief-experience? - And how much is just intellectual games inside my head? To speak with authority, you've gotta know.

I think my best way forward is going to be to speak what I think when I have something worth saying, and defer to the experts otherwise. Or, rather, other people who have done so much better a job at uncovering truth and formulating their thoughts than I can. Tzzzt. Wait, what did I just say? Strike that. Strike that. Forget it. I mean, what's the fuss? Really. I'll figure it out as I go along.

Boy, I'm really making this overly complicated. And I just read a great reminder on the Beauty of Simplicity today. Oughta keep that in mind. Mmm, yeah. Keep It Simple, Sunshine. Right on.

Oh-kaaaaaaay, that's it for my little angst session. Thank you very much. That was very cathartic.

Bye now.