Confessions, Not Resolutions.
So today began the year of oh-ten. Instead of writing up some goofy resolutions, or a retrospective, I'm going to write some random thoughts and confessions from 2009.
- I don't miss the once-close friend who dropped me from her life back in January.
- I still don't think there is anything good inside the 'country' genre of music.
- I secretly enjoyed watching Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift.
- I think she's a terrible musician.
- But I don't think Beyonce had a great video, either.
- I love ToM.
- I don't ever say I love Janus on these lists because I believe that every letter I type directly implies that love.
- I'm not a very good college student.
- Yes, I judge you when you misuse the plural of 'BIONICLE'.
- I think Mike Leach deserved to be fired.
- But I also hate Texas Tech.
- Brickfair was a top-five highlight event of my year.
- I honestly enjoyed the last year more than any other in my entire life.
- I enjoy MTV's "World's Strictest Parents".
- Katy Perry is on my crush list.
- I think her cat's name (Kitty Purry) is clever.
- I enjoy reading intense conspiracy theories.
- And sometimes wish they were real.
- I finally accepted some of the gifts I've been given, personality-wise.
- "It's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive."
- Sometimes I doubt everything I believe.
- And I think that's healthy.
- I sometimes secretly judge people from small towns based on stereotypes.
- I can't stand rural accents.
- I'm working on being less judgmental of the 'country/redneck' culture.
- I'm a work in progress.
- I'm a hopeless romantic.
- Who happens to be not looking for a relationship at this time.
- I have dated a girl who was engaged.
- While she was engaged.
- And I lived with her fiancee.
- I don't claim that as a good decision.
- Because it wasn't.
- To reiterate: it was a bad decision.
- I was in three weddings this year.
- I was supposed to be in a fourth.
- Weddings cause me to get pensive.
- All four guys I spent my first few college years with got married this year.
- Joe and I are the only ones left.
- I alternate between jealous and relieved that I'm not amongst their number.
- I like 'groaner' jokes.
- The problems suffered by the fictional children in one of my case study books made me cry.
- I think people with big houses well above their needs are irresponsible.
- I don't want to live the American dream.
- I'm losing my cynicism the more I engage real people on a deeper level.
- Sometimes I want to stubbornly keep it.
- Cynicism is a nice shield.
- I don't like working on things that bother me instead of just complaining about them.
- But responsibility and change don't come from merely complaining.
- I slept through more classes than was wise.
- And I don't care enough about that.
- Being in charge of a house church scared me.
- I check my Flickr stats more in one day than most people probably do in a week.
- I'm jealous of the free time Primus has to build with.
- I wore my hair in a ponytail for a whole week at one point this year.
- Just to see if people recognized me.
- Yes, I like that girl I'm always talking to at work.
- Well of course it's obvious. I'm not trying to keep it a secret.
- But I'm also not trying to do anything about it. I'm seasonal.
- I've had an expired tag on my license plate since May.
- I'm ashamed by members of my faith more often than I want to be.
- I hate masculinity movements.
- If it's sad, it probably makes me super-sad.
- I hate the south.
- And Texans? You're not awesome.
- At least, not more than anyone else.
- Your state is ugly, empty, and hot.
- But I love you anyway.
- I'm trying to love everyone.
- Always.
- Because I still believe that Love Wins.
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