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Jonestown Bartender

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Blog Entries posted by Jonestown Bartender

  2. Jonestown Bartender
    Her eyes are already violet, and it only takes a few minutes. She turns into an enormous blueberry. Eight feet wide, tender, ripe, juicy. She's still getting bigger and she's going to explode any minute. She's beyond help, the slightest touch will make her explode anyway. Very embarrassing and painful, she can only watch as her body grows larger and tighter with each passing second.
     
     
     
    What do you do with her? Try uselessly to save her? Put her out of her misery? Leave her to explode in solitude?
  5. Jonestown Bartender
    You have always been a potato.
     
    As a potato you have formed a potato hivemind and brainjacked the CEO of AngryCorp. and his daughter. You are currently commanding young Emma to infiltrate her neighbor's house and introduce her friend Brian to the potato hive.
     
    She is currently being piloted by the scoutato, your youngling sporetatoes have matured bringing your sporetato count to three. You also have a bag of fellow vegetables, fruits and bread products that are willing to serve. Adam, the CEO of AngryCorp. rests in a comatose state on the couch.
     
    What is your next action?
  7. Jonestown Bartender
    Someone leads you to a closed door.
     
    The person says behind that door is your own personal paradise; what your heart desires the most.
     
    So, what's behind your door?
     
     
     
    Mine would be endless hills of wheat with no bugs, tons saucy brunettes and redheads who are madly in love with me, and endless fields full of crows for me to watch.
  8. Jonestown Bartender
    You can not say goodbye to family/friends
    When your day is up all evidence you will be gone.
    You can not go outside of 40 miles of your home.
    If you destroy anything or kill anyone they/it will go back to it's/their former state because after your day you will never have existed.
     
     
    Now what do you do?
  11. Jonestown Bartender
    You could you know, ask me to remove it?
     
     
    It seems that most of what gets me in trouble is that someone doesn't like something I post, they make a long winded rant about how I'm wrong/a bad person, I get mad, they report me for pwoto.
     
     
    You could save us both a lot of time if you just said;
     
    "That offends me, could you please remove it?"
     
     
    I'd be like;
     
    "k, sure"
     
    and you'd be like;
     
    "awesome, thanks man."
     
     
    You guys want me to be reasonable? why don't you try being reasonable first?
  12. Jonestown Bartender
    Then kids who complain about how overly strict social rules are?
     
     
     
    Kids who complain about how much better things were when their great-grandparents were teenagers.
     
     
     
    God dose that get me angry.
     
     
    Yeah, enjoy your child labor, Prohibition, and small pox you moron.
  13. Jonestown Bartender

    You Sheep

    By Jonestown Bartender,

    You sheep, you just don't understand the way the world works, do you? You're following what authority wants you to believe, when the truth is under your very nose.
    The government is controlled by Ganondorf. Don't believe me? Then why is there a TRIFORCE in DC's layout? And why can you see the outline of GANONDORF HIMSELF in the buildings?!?! I've taken the time and effort to shed the light on this awful conspiracy perpetuated by the pigs controlling this country.
     
  15. Jonestown Bartender
    Political parties are a joke.
     
     
     
    The reason they're so popular is that they appeal to four very comforting human thought process;
     
     
    1. Tribe/clan/order/family/some kind of small close knit society.
    2. Black and white prospective ( if you make this legal the world will end!)
    3. The us and them mentality. (A tribe only last as long as it is opposed)
    4. And the infamous "I only want to be with people that are just like me"
     
     
     
     
    And (at least in the US) you picking whether you want spiked Coke or spiked Pepsi.
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