ZippyWharrgarbl

I haven't set a definite date, but I think I'll leave November open. (I still need to PM some other members to give a final notice for edits.)

Ohhhhh thank goodness. Yeah, I'll be free like halfway through November so this is actually great. Thank you for the heads up!

Alright, I've finally read this.

 

The only possible issue I noticed was establishing Naho's weapon. That's the kind of thing the contest rules forbid, so I'd prefer that be edited out (a weapon / Toa Tool can be mentioned but no specifics). I won't call this essential, though, as technically it doesn't state that it's her normal weapon.

 

As to the door being ajar, I don't see an issue there. We've never been told that Makuta (or Dume) always lock doors as far as I know, and Makuta certainly does make mistakes. Plus, at that point I don't know that it really mattered as he was probably already planning to off Kodan and the Toa Mangai anyway.

 

So, calling this good to go for polls.

I didn't realise there was a rule against naming weapons. I figured it was such a minute detail, and one that had no effect on the plot, but I'm sorry about that.

Also, while I'm happy that this is all right to go to polls, I have a question: I've mentioned before that I'd like to reword some cringeworthy passages. However, due to me being really busy for the last few months, I haven't had the time to fix up any of these. Is it still all right for me to do so within, say, the next few weeks? If not, at what time are edits not allowed?

Thank you for the feedback, by the way. Though this is sort of old, I still like this little piece. In that it doesn't make me immediately try and curl into myself with embarrassment at the thought of it. It's always nice when I can think of an old story like that.

 

I don't want to sound rude, but if you Google the definition for 'dead language', it literally gives Latin as an example. No one speaks Latin on an everyday basis. It is a dead language. It is actually the poster-boy for dead languages. You ask anyone on the street for a dead language and they will immediately reply with 'Latin'. Other languages may have borrowed from it- you look into the history of the English language and you'll find a swag of different languages rolled into it, and Latin's probably one of them- but no one uses Latin itself anymore. It's gone. It's dead. It did not adapt into modern Latin and still goes on, it stopped being used. It was changed to New Latin for use in science, but that did not count as an actual language as no one used it on an everyday basis. If they did, then it wouldn't be a dead language. But they didn't. So it is.

Latin being dead is a common misconception, that's why you get that result when you google it and that's why everybody else here thinks it is. Linguists dont' consider gradual language change to be a form of language death since it's impossible to pinpoint language death that way, and therefore impossible to classify languages as alive or dead.

 

It must be a very common misconception, if every other scholarly source I've found states it. Look, I'm really sorry and I know it's not fair for everyone to gang up on you like this, but Latin is, indeed, a very dead language. While yes, linguists do have a point that it's hard to pinpoint gradual change- usually for the big changes you can pinpoint them but for smaller changes that can be harder- but by the common, accepted, layman's definition, it's a dead language.

EDIT:

They said it was a common misconception, so I really don't think I misheard them. It might be that there is disagreement within the scientific community about the terminology however and that they failed to mention that... That wouldn't actually be the first time they failed to mention disagreement on scientific issues at my university. So I'll concede that some linguists probably consider ancestral languages dead languages as well. 

 

It's probably differing definitions. All the sources I've seen point to the definition used by everyone else- that is, it's not used in an everyday way. This also seems to explain why all my sources indicate that it is a dead language; perhaps your professors' definition is from a small niche rather than the one used by other areas. They should probably have clarified this to you in your course, but it's understandable if they didn't.

EDIT EDIT: We're really, REALLY getting off topic here. I say we put it down to differing definitions of the phrase "dead language" and cut it out before we completely derail the discussion. Further than we have, I mean. We're practically on another set of rails now.

No it's not. Language death happens when the last native speaker of a language dies and the language is replaced by another language in the language community. That didn't happen with Latin, Latin gradually developed into Italian, Spanish French etc. That doesn't mean people who speak Spanish actually speak Latin, but it does mean that they speak a descendant from Latin and therefore Latin is not dead. No you shouldn't speak some ancient form of German, but that doesn't mean Old German is dead. Old German developed into Modern German.

 

I don't want to sound rude, but if you Google the definition for 'dead language', it literally gives Latin as an example. No one speaks Latin on an everyday basis. It is a dead language. It is actually the poster-boy for dead languages. You ask anyone on the street for a dead language and they will immediately reply with 'Latin'. Other languages may have borrowed from it- you look into the history of the English language and you'll find a swag of different languages rolled into it, and Latin's probably one of them- but no one uses Latin itself anymore. It's gone. It's dead. It did not adapt into modern Latin and still goes on, it stopped being used. It was changed to New Latin for use in science, but that did not count as an actual language as no one used it on an everyday basis. If they did, then it wouldn't be a dead language. But they didn't. So it is.

EDIT: I think you may have misheard your professors. If you search for actual scholarly texts studying Latin, each and every one of them refer to it as a dead language.

 

When was the last time the Catholic Church sued someone for trying to copyright Latin terms?

When was the last time anyone other than the Maori activists complained about anyone using their language in their intellectual property?

 

And do any of them speak it on a regular basis? If not, it's a dead language. Plain and simple.

That's not actually how it works. Latin is not dead since the romance languages descend from it. And on top of that is is the liturgical language of the Catholic Church, many hymns are sung in Latin because of the significance it has to the Catholic Church.

 

Hey! So I just wanted to clear things up: Lucina's description is exactly how it works! Science- especially the biology field, my favourite - also uses Latin. It was considered the language of science at one point. It doesn't stop it from being a dead language! It's nothing terrible, it just means that it's no longer in everyday spoken use. No one uses Latin as an everyday spoken language anymore. Your example- the Catholic Church- does not use it in an everyday way. Hymns and the like are not everyday; I wouldn't greet someone and ask about their day with a hymn.

But I'm a bit off topic. I'm not entirely sure how to feel about the name 'Okoto' - it puts in mind a bustling neon city to me- but I'm quite happy to sit back and see what happens!

I hope some iteration of Bara Magna comes back if it's a reboot, though. Some of my favourite characters are there. :c

Looking at the Maori and Matoran translations, I love the suggestion that perhaps faces or masks are associated with spirits in Matoran culture. I know it was meant to be a giant spoiler for Mata Nui's true form, but using the word for 'face' as the word for 'spirit' has some nice connotations. I mean, masks are pretty vital to the Matoran; they fall into a coma after a while without them. Even Toa are weakened without a mask. If you were a Matoran and wore a thing that would cause you to weaken and die without it, you'd attach a pretty big cultural significance to it. Not to mention, in MoL, it's shown that Jaller's grave has his mask floating upon it, and in MoMN, when Lhikan dies, he gives Vakama his mask.

I may be thinking too hard about this, but it's a nice connection.

 

When will editing close? Is there a date for that?

I now only have three entries left to check, so I'd like to close this out soooooniiiiiish. But no, no official date. I've been slow, so it's only fair of me to be patient with everybody else!

 

Sometime this year?

 

So far there's only a tiny number of entries that need major work. All those members have been PMed (one just now). Unfortunately there's been no response from the ones I PMed weeks ago. What I'll probably do is, whenever I get through ALL entries, I'll PM those members again, and then set a deadline, and work on the poll drafts in the meantime. But I'm not sure what kind of time span after that I should pick. I'm trying to be especially accommodating since Bionicle is over; a lot of people don't check BZP frequently anymore. Open to suggestions.

 

That's good to hear! I'm in university at the moment, so I've been fairly busy recently, on top of being lazy in my off-time. I'll get on it soon!

I'm assuming "Sometime this year" doesn't mean anytime within the month?

Yes, since editing is still open, I'm allowing that kind of thing, as long as you do what you said there; ask permission and note every change.

Awesome! I'll be on that soon. When will editing close? Is there a date for that? I tend to procrastinate a lot, and I'd like to make sure I don't miss the editing window. c:>

I'm not entirely sure if this has been answered, exactly, but I'd like to pose a question. I was just rereading my entry and some parts of it, while legible and certainly had nothing wrong with them in regards to grammar (that I could see), were... sort of winceworthy to read, to me. Once again, it was not anything that would render it unreadable. Specifically, it was stylistic preferences; some sentences used the same word twice to describe something and it made the sentence sort of awkward to me.

Could I edit these? I will record every change made, and no changes will be made to the story itself, nor to any detail except I'll use a synonym or something like that. Also, if any of the edits come off as too flashy or not allowed (like, I don't know, adding an extra sentence or more than five words, I suppose) I'll change it right back or offer a better solution.

I don't want to be a bother, but as I'm sure everyone knows, even things you wrote two years ago can have major flaws compared to your current writing. I'd like to submit a contest-worthy entry, and apparently me from two years ago had different standards to what I do.

Also, I'm sorry if this has already been answered. I just figured there was no harm in asking.

 

Okay I don't know if Greg has ever covered this, but I have a big serious question: if romance is non-canon, then how does a big chunk of web of Shadows work? Why does Sidorak want to marry Roodaka if there are no romantic feelings? Why is there a CONCEPT of marriage if there are no romantic feelings? That seems to completely contradict the whole thing.

Yeah, it pretty much does. I believe the answer they used was that it was some sort of political alliance. Also, I think that came from the movie people too (certainly it was in a movie, but I think the other sources also included it to be consistent with that, if bad memory serves).

 

In BIONICLE Adventures #9: Web of Shadows, Sidorak is stated to think of Roodaka as something to be "trusted and coveted". He also acts pretty infatuated with her. That said, later on in the book it states that an engagement between the two meant that they would share their conquests, the competition to earn Makuta's favour would be over and Sidorak would have "standing in Roodaka's land".

That said, for someone who's not meant to be in love with Roodaka, he sure acts like he's in love with her. In another book (Adventures #8), a bit after she sits around musing on how he's probably going to die and how great that is, he is thinking about how he's going to go home and have a big old victory celebration with Roodaka. Also, if it was simply a political thing, why would Roodaka have to try so hard to make him like her? She's got power and everything, so there's not really a reason to be so admiring towards him, nor for he to apparently enjoy Roodaka's company so much. In fact, it's kind of weird, them apparently competing for Makuta's attention for however long before this.

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but the main source of the word 'evolution' being used for the change was coined by Chirox, right? Mutran quoted him saying it in his diary, as I recall.

If so, then I reckon all that's happened is that Chirox sought to make it sound as wondrous and awesome as they percieved it to be. What they actually went through was a sort of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles mutation. It wasn't realistic, but basically they all mutated in a Hollywood fashion to become antidermis in a shell. As unrealistic as it was, it was actually a better term for what happened than evolution.

Chirox used 'evolution' because it would probably sound gross and mundane to say 'mutation'. Mutation gives the image of slimy things that live in sewers. Evolution, however, sounds much more eloquent and lovely, and romanticises the change.

It's also because Malum's the best and literally every member of the Bionicle universe wants to be him in some way. This is usually a subconscious instinct, found even in the smallest of single-celled organisms. Scientists in the Matoran Universe have been studying this effect, though they have had no context to put it to before their arrival on Spherus Magna.

In all seriousness, though, they probably saw Malum a bunch out in the desert, leading his Vorox in attacks on Skrall or Bone Hunter camps. Also, seeing as there's not much to eat out in the desert, it's entirely possible that he ate scarabax occasionally. Bugs have a lot of protein in them.

Such violence in this page! :U Also I'm sure that's just how she invites people to afternoon tea. Those guys are so rude!

This is still looking great!

Ha, I bet this is going to end in tears. Probably Traqq's tears.

Just to add a citation to this:

Even Gresh is stated on BS01 to have been around then, despite being thought of as "young" (compared to the others), though not sure what source they do get that from.

 

It's mentioned that Gresh was too young to remember how Spherus Magna was before it shattered in The Crossing,and since it has been mentioned that there were no new Glatorian born after the Shattering, he was most likely around but too young to recall it.

In Raid on Vulcanus he also has a talk with Gelu about the Core War, and from what he says, it doesn't sound like he was there himself.

EDIT: Ugh sorry I misread the question >:C I wrote an entire ruddy essay about whether Mata Nui is called 'Mata Nui' or 'Toa Mata Nui' on Bara Magna and I feel like such a silly.

I'd call the Mata Nui set more canon, purely because it is the form used to represent him in the movie, comics and illustrated books, whereas the Toa Mata Nui set hasn't appeared anywhere in the story. Besides, in canon, Mata Nui wouldn't look all that much like the toys, instead being made of flesh and metal and other stuff. I guess, even then, using the representation in the media of the Bionicle story, I'd place him as looking more like the Mata Nui set.

Interesting to note, though, on the topic of canon appearances: the official The Legend Reborn novel has his armour colour down as being 'white and gold', not 'black and gold'. Weird.

I sincerely hope that the stuff between Pohatu's chestplate is not lung tissue. Poor guy would be dead in less than a day.

See, not only would he be EXTREMELY prone to being stabbed or cut there (not just by bad guys, but also by environmental factors like twigs or everyday wear and tear), but there is also the issue of it drying out. Lungs are meant to be moist and wet and gross, because that's how they diffuse gases across their membranes fast enough to allow healthy levels of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the body at all times. Exposing the tissue to air would most likely dry the lungs out, causing their efficiency to drop to deadly levels.

There's also the issue that the alveoli- that is, the little air sacs where this diffusion of gases takes place in the lung- have sticky walls, due to them being wet. You actually cannot breathe out all the air from your lungs, as you need some in there to keep the alveoli puffed up so they don't stick their walls together. If their walls stick together, then air can't get to the entire wall, which reduces the surface area of the lung as a whole (surface area is very important in biology, especially regarding diffusion). It's possible that something blunt prodding the lung could stick the walls together. We have a lovely rib cage and a layer of skin and fleshy stuff to prevent this, but if that's bare lung tissue, you'd probably squish the poor little alveoli so they smoosh together.

Also there's that nasty infection risk. Wet environment, exposed to air, and easy to get cuts and grazes on? Sounds like bacteria paradise.

I reckon that it's either artistic licence or flesh to cover up the delicate tissues in there. It looks pretty non-yielding, so it's probably there to protect the organs.

As for the other two, the muscley stuff could be actual muscle, and the wiry, sinewy stuff looks like tendons or similar.

Sorry for the long post, just wanted to clear some stuff up about lungs! c:

It was a hard decision, but you know what they say: without the brain, you're going insane.

Insane Bionicle Brain.

I think that two, three, and six could be considered important numbers, with six being the most important. From a team of six, two Toa Kaita were created by two groups of three Toa. They often traveled in pairs or groups of three. There were six elemental tribes. On Metru Nui, the Civil War led to two groups of three districts fighting.

Similarly, seven is treated as a sort of oddity- Takanuva was apparently not a member of the Toa Nuva, and there was a definite wedge between the six Turaga of Mata Nui and Turaga Dume. It was more of a "six plus one" deal. Of course, this could also be attributed to both cases having the "plus one" as a newcomer.

I have two Matoran I'd like to see as Toa, actually: Taipu and Kapura. In fact, they should be a two-person Toa team. I am sure that this whole Makuta business could have been resolved in a matter of days had they been left up to fixing it.

I cannot sufficiently describe the joy that has consumed by heart. Really looking forward to seeing this here!

 

I'd lend my voice for Kiina, but alas, I have no recording equipment. Good golly, what have I started....? X'D

You have started a masterpiece.

Though listening to the music has made me realize that it kinda doesn't have much form and would be very hard to create actual lyrics to...

 

Incorporate that into the lyrics. The characters occasionally drift off and look really confused due to their singing.

Also, fun fact: if the podcasts are considered canon, Hero Factory has a canon musical in-story based off the Factory's top heroes. Bionicle should top this by having their entire lives as a musical.

 

Oh, and the writing could have been worse, too, you know. Considering they cast Jim Cummings as Ackar, they could have given him a singing role. I now dare you to look up Steady as the Beating Drum (Reprise) from Pocahontas, and In the Dark of the Night from Anastasia. *ducks out and leaves you all with that fabulous mental-image*

 

That would have been wonderful.

 

No, really, imagine how awesome it would have been for Ackar to start singing about the good ol' days of the Core War.

 

I agree fully. Imagine if the entire movie had character songs added.

Imagine if the entire story was a musical.

Bionicle: the Musonicle.

This is the most beautiful, artistic thing I've ever seen. My eyes are watering as I fall to my knees, entranced by the sheer power of the comic. There will be nothing as heart-shatteringly graceful as this ever again in the history of mankind.

They must have SOME way to repair armour. I mean, Teridax got a leak in Time Trap, and it's assumed he fixed that. The exact line suggests that you don't need to be a Nynrah Ghost to fix it, but you do need time.

His Kanohi mask and armor kept his dark energies in place. With his breastplate damaged, precious power was slipping away from him. But there was no time to make repairs, not with Vakama on the loose with the Mask of Time.

Maybe they use their laser/heat vision or something? Weld the two sides back together?