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  1. Click this banner (or this link) to be taken to a new epic, released in 2015. It is a re-imagining of the events depicted in this topic. It is standalone, and is what I would call the "definitive" version, even if it is not yet complete. If you do read it, please note that reading this topic is NOT necessary. Back on December 19, 2010, I posted the first chapter to a comedy I had titled Tahu vs. Tahu. It was a massive hit, reaching the hot topics list on the front page of BZPower 9 times and amassing 13 pages between the first two seasons. Unfortunately, that original topic was lost in the Great Downtime of 2011; however, when the forums returned I re-launched it with the third season. That topic can be seen here, where it managed 12 pages for the final two seasons. However, that topic is no longer readable due to the formatting errors that hit BZPower in late 2013, and since the loss of the archives, the first two seasons cannot be found at all. As such, I have decided to re-release the entire thing in this topic - right from the very beginning to the very end. Assuming that I remember to keep up with the schedule, I shall post a single chapter each day; after the completion of each season, I shall also release its related specials - chapters that were unrelated to the main story and served purely as comic relief. Please keep in mind while reading that the comedy itself remains unchanged. It was originally written several years ago, and I have left it entirely intact. Hopefully it is still mildly fun to laugh at the horrible writing. Anyway... without further ado, I present the original Tahu vs. Tahu. (Oh, and I will update this post with links to each chapter as they are released.) Click to see banners & chapters Originally released December 19, 2010-January 30, 2011 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10 Specials: 1-2-3 Originally released February 2, 2011-April 16,2011 1-2-3-4-5-6 / 7-8-9-10 Specials: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8 Originally released October 15, 2011-February 22, 2012 P-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-E Specials: 1-2-3-4 Originally released February 27, 2012-September 27, 2012 P-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-E Deleted Scenes: 4.5 - 6.5 Specials: 1-2 Originally released November 2, 2012-November 23, 2012 1-2-3-4 Originally released December 4, 2012-February 16, 2013 P-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-E Originally released April 1, 2013-October 2013 (partially lost) P-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-E Tahu vs. Tahu – Civil War Chapter 1 – The New Arrivals 10 Years Ago.... The boy rushed into the giant mansion, dragging several giant plastic bags behind him. Inside were several canisters and boxes, full of brand new toys. Inside these boxes were rahi, such as Nui-Rama. Inside the canisters were the Toa Mata, all six. One would become the leader of all the bionicles to come, never challenged, never fought with. Of course, if it were to be that way forever, then this comedy would end before it began, so of course things are going to get spiced up a bit. Tahu Mata yawned and stood the first bionicle to ever be built in the mansion. He glanced around, and saw his fellow toa still in their canisters. He walked over to Lewa’s, sidestepping the bumps in the blanket, and twisted the canister open, with great difficulty. After several minutes, Lewa was standing next to him. “Hello.” Tahu said. “Hello.” Lewa said. “This is... boring.” “Yeah.” Tahu agreed. “But once more of us are built, we’re gonna have a party!” And so, half an hour later, the rahi had all flown away, and the six toa were sitting with the turaga, who’d also arrived. “I say we vote for a leader.” Turaga Onewa decided. “I vote Tahu, since he was the first open.” “No, really, you don’t need to.” Tahu laughed. “I’m serious.” Onewa told him. “Alright then.” Turaga Matau said. “It is official. Tahu Mata is our leader!” “This... should be interesting.” Tahu muttered. Today.... “Alright.” Tahu Mata yelled, as the gathered bionicles below him fell silent. “It’s been ten great years.” Tahu Mata announced. “We’ve announced Lewa Mata as my second in command; we’ve named several others as a lower level government. We’ve lived in peace and prosperity. Now, as you all know, bionicle is ending.” There were prompt boos. “Hero Factory sucks!” someone yelled. Tahu Mata nodded. “However, we must prepare. We are receiving six new arrivals today, made as a tribute to some of us. I do not know who yet.” “I hope it’s me.” Ahkmou interrupted. “As I was saying.” Tahu Mata continued. “That is not the only thing; once Hero Factory arrives, we need to be prepared. They may be hostile, and we’ll have no idea how ruthless they are.” “If they’re anything like us, then they’re gonna kill someone.” Kazi pointed out. “Hey!” Toa Metru Matau swung into the room. “Shut up! The sets are arriving!” “Places!” Tahu Mata ordered. Not one second after Velika had dodged out of sight; several bags flew into the room and landed on the bed. Several black and yellow canisters fell off the bed and to the floor with a crash. “Looks like some are species sets.” Tahu Mata said, crawling out of the shadows. “Hey, the yellow one’s a Rahkshi!” Takanuva exclaimed. “It’s... yellow. And it doesn’t have a name. Just Rahkshi.” “Looks like the series is called ‘Stars’.” Kazi announced. “Small set remakes.” “Well, that does look rather spot on.” A Panrahk replied, gazing at the Rahkshi Stars. “Let’s open them.” “Ugh... there’s twenty-seven.” Tahu Mistika groaned. “This isn’t going to be fun.” “Relax.” The Panrahk assured him. “We Rahkshi will handle it.” “What’s the black one?” Tahu Mata asked, approaching. “Skrall Stars.” Kazi told him. A cheer went up from the Skrall sets from the winter of 2009. One ran over. “Hey!” it exclaimed. “This isn’t right! These Skrall are black and green! Only Tuma is black and green!” A groan went up from the Skrall sets from the winter of 2009. The Skrall ran back over. “Toa Hordika! You, the Visorak, and the Vahki can build the Skrall Stars.” Tahu Mata ordered. “Yes.” Nuju Hordika grinned. “We get to build some of the last sets!” “There’s a blue one!” Kazi called. “It’s called... Piraka Stars.” “Awesome!” Vezok grinned. “Wait... why is it named after the line?” Kazi shrugged. “I dunno. But it looks individual; there’s only one.” Vezok glanced at the canister. “Oh, that’s Nektann.” He told them. “Wonder why his canister doesn’t have a name?” Vezok shrugged and carried the canister over to Zaktan and Avak. The other three piraka ran over to join in. “The white one is... a Takanuva Stars.” Kazi called. Both Takanuva and Takanuva Mistika rushed over. Both paused. “Why does he look like a toa of ice?” Takanuva Mistika asked. “Yeah.” Takanuva replied. “He should be white and gold, or at the very least, white and gunmetal.” “Just build him.” Ackar said wearily. “The green one?” Tahu Mata asked as several Rahkshi Stars and Skrall Stars stood and began glancing around. “Gresh Stars.” Kazi answered. Lewa, Matau, and Lesovikk snapped their fingers, muttering. Gresh rolled his eyes and stepped forward. “What the heck?!” he exclaimed. “My weapon is silver! That stinks! And so does my all lime green helmet! Ugh....” And with that, the jungle Glatorian sat down and began to build. “The red one?” Tahu Mata asked. Kazi glanced in, and then paused. “Kazi?” Tahu Mata prompted. “Yeah... um... it’s you.” He stammered. “What do you mean?” Tahu Mata asked. Kazi turned the canister and showed him. “Looks like after a decade, you’re gonna face a challenge for your leadership.” Nuparu Inika pointed out. “Yeah.” To Be Continued....
  2. Original Topic Tahu vs. Tahu Wiki - Key Info Here, and Tidbits! Banners for Seasons 1, 2, and 3 done by Cherixon! Banner for Season 4 done by Click! Much thanks! Season 1 - Civil War 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10 Characters & Alliances Season 1 Re-Mastered 1-2 Season 2 - Invasion1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10 Characters & Alliances AftermathPrologue-1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-EpilogueCharacters The Tahu vs. Tahu Timeline Deconstruction Prologue-1-2-3-4 (½)-5-6-7-8-Epilogue Characters & AlliancesPSAs1-2-3-4-5-6-7Interviews1-2-3-4-5-6 Specials & Other Chapters 1-2-3-4 BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #4 (February 2nd, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #4 (February 3rd, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #7 (March 18th, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #8 (March 26th, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #3 (March 27th, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #10 (March 31st, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #7 (April 2nd, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #9 (April 11th, 2011)BZPower Home Page Hot Topic - #9 (April 17th, 2011) Hot Topics List Gone After Forum Upgrade ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tahu vs. TahuAftermathChapter 1 – Depth ChargeiBrow Comedy ProductionsThe Year is 2011....Underwater in the Pond:Pridak swam lazily towards his pal Mantax’s cave taking in the massive bunches of rotting leaves clumped together in cracks in the rock.“Yo, Mantax!” he called, announcing his entrance. “What’s up bro?”“The same thing that was ‘up’ last time you were around.”“You’re still trying to get that soggy loaf of bread out of here?” Pridak queried, swimming into the cave and taking in the humongous loaf of bread that was slowly disintegrating into Mantax’s new home.“Yes.” Mantax sighed. “I hate this place. I wanna live on dry land again.”“Don’t let Carapar hear you say that. He’ll tear you to pieces.” Pridak warned.Mantax snorted, and a clump of soggy bread flew up into his nose. Pridak roared with laughter as the black Barraki desperately attempted to remove the bread, huffing and puffing his way into the next continent. After a few moments however Pridak grew bored of the struggle and wrenched the bread out of Mantax’s face, allowing Mantax to begin breathing again.“So Mantax, I’ve been wondering....” Pridak began, sinking onto his friend’s couch.“What is it? Did we leave a secret plan behind?” Mantax guessed, sitting in the chair opposite.“No....” Pridak sighed, glancing away. “Have you ever wondered what life would be like if the Tahu vs. Tahu war hadn’t occurred?”“Well, we sure as heck wouldn’t be living in this dump.” Mantax asserted.“You’re right. Who was the numb nut who had the idea to move all of 2007 here in the first place?” Pridak questioned.“...You.” Mantax answered.Pridak paused, mouth slightly open.“Right... oops.” He muttered, chuckling. “Seriously though, have you?”“Not really.” Mantax shook his head thoughtfully. “But if the Tahu vs. Tahu conflict hadn’t occurred, something would have. You remember what happened in 2009, right?”“Of course. We picked the wrong side in that battle.”“Obviously. We landed back in jail, though our selection wasn’t a surprise.” Mantax replied. “But nothing really occurred to cause that conflict. And you saw just how easily half of the Bionicles left Tahu Mata for Tahu Stars. Something like that doesn’t happen instantaneously. Sets weren’t happy with how things were.”Mantax sucked in a couple of breaths, coughing a bit when he swallowed some of the clearly poisonous water.“You’re right.” Pridak agreed. “So civil war was inevitable. So was invasion, I suppose. And now we’re dealing with the aftermath of both.”“Absolutely no way around it either.” Mantax told him. “I mean, it’s not like we can go back in time and change everything.”A spark lit in Pridak’s eyes- a spark that Mantax instantly recognized as an idea.Usually these ideas never ended well. So Mantax couldn’t blame himself when nervousness immediately set in.“What’s the plan?” Mantax sighed, rolling his eyes.“Time!” Pridak exclaimed. “Mantax, we could go back in time! We could change everything! Make everything better!”“Er... how?” Mantax scratched his head. “We have no idea what might happen.”“We go back in time and kill Tahu Mata.” Pridak responded. “You, me, and two others.”“Irnakk would be cool. He’s pretty strong.” Mantax suggested. “Maybe Kazi. He worked well with us on the Nuju Metru mission.”“Then it’s settled.” Pridak stood and began pacing the cave. “We’ll get Irnakk and Kazi and time travel to 2001, kill Tahu Mata, return to 2011, and everything should be better.”“How are we going to get out, though?” Mantax asked. “Hydraxon and Maxilos are constantly patrolling the exit, and if they see trouble they’ll send Karzahni too.”“We’re going to need a distraction....” Pridak pondered.“No. He’d never do it.” Mantax shook his head.“He knows he has to pay for past crimes. This is how he’ll pay.” Pridak decided. “Don’t worry Mantax. Everything is going to go out of control.”“That’s precisely why I’m worrying pal.”Later on under the Pond:“Hey! Get back here!” Hydraxon bellowed. “I SAID GET BACK HERE! You know locking people into jail cells is illegal! Get back here Takadox, or I’ll rip you in-”TRIP.“Ouch!” Hydraxon muttered, twisting his ankle as he fell. “Stupid banana peel.”Maxilos sped by him, firing Cordak rounds at the fleeing Takadox.“The problem Takadox....” the robot began, “Is that you glow in the dark. Thus, there can be no escape for you.”“Yeah, that does suck!” Takadox called back. “And I’m actually beginning to regret agreeing to this!”Hydraxon stood and swam after them, quickly passing Maxilos and firing his own Cordak rounds at the fleeing Barraki, until....TRIP.“WHAT IN MATA-NUI’S NAME WAS IT THIS TIME?!” Hydraxon screamed. “Oh. Stupid giant banana peel!”Maxilos rolled his eyes and yanked Hydraxon back to his feet, gesturing towards Takadox.“We have him trapped.” The robotic set murmured. “Close in.”Hydraxon glanced over and saw that what Maxilos said was true.“Any last words before we lock you up for good?” he called, swaggering forward.TRIP.“SON OF A-”“Yeah,” Takadox sniggered, backing into the wall. “The fact that you have repeatedly tripped and fallen while swimming underwater is highly amusing. It makes this tiresome payment worth it.”“Wait a minute....” Maxilos paused. “Payment for what?”“Oh, you didn’t know?” Takadox asked innocently, pointing behind them. “Pridak and Mantax are leaving.”Maxilos whipped around and saw not only Pridak and Mantax leaving, but what appeared to be Kalmah and Ehlek as well.“I thought the six of you had broken up!” he exclaimed.“We did!” Takadox answered from behind him. “But Pridak and Mantax got us back together.”“What’s Carapar doing?” Hydraxon hissed, standing once again. “What did you have him do?”“Nothing.” Takadox shrugged. “He’s too dumb. It’s just me and the ones escaping. Good luck capturing them.”“Oh we’ll capture them alright.” Hydraxon responded. “You think we’re the only ones enforcing order? We made a deal with the Makuta, fool; they’ll haul the other Barraki back here in no time.”Takadox snorted in disbelief. Hydraxon stepped towards him threateningly, only to trip once again. Takadox and Maxilos both began to howl with laughter.To Be Continued....Next time on Tahu vs. Tahu: Aftermath->A new storyline begins!->The past revealed!->A jailbreak....So there you have it! The debut of Tahu vs. Tahu: Aftermath on BZP!How was it? All comments and criticisms and reviews are appreciated!Links will hopefully come soon- I've decided to just post this as it is for now.And about that prologue....-ibrow
  3. So yaa I lied. Again. I'm good at that. Instead of Monday or Thursday, Omegafest will begin on Tuesday, with the iBrow day. After that I'm not entirely sure, but there will be a couple of TBTTRAH days thrown in there to show some of the new stuff I've been working on(and believe me, there's a lot of new stuff). If you want to secure a day, just post here and say which day. Otherwise I'll assign one to you. -MT
  4. That's right, you heard me... Season 4. But what about season 4? Asks you. Ah, the title. Says I. WHAT IS IT? Bellows you. Deconstruction. Says I. Yes, at the moment, the title for Tahu vs. Tahu Season 4 is Deconstruction. Thoughts? ~Classical~
  5. Well, first, Interview #4 is up, of course. But if you're reading this, you already know that. More importantly, is the original draft to the finale of season 1. Enjoy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It has been months; precisely eight. Eight months since the arrival of the Bionicle Stars, lead by Tahu Stars. Eight months since he and Tahu Mata went to war. It has been... boring, for the past few months. Peace... but no prosperity. Calm... But never safe. The arrival of new sets is imminent, and Tahu Mata knows this; doubtless Tahu Stars has heard by now as well. He expects the next attack soon. Eight months.... It ends now. Or does it? Tahu vs. Tahu Season 1 [Civil War] Chapter 10 {The Not-So Grand Finale} Comedy Developer [Freelancer iBrow] The Spare Bedroom.... “Sir?” Takanuva called. “What is it?” Tahu Mata asked as the Toa of light approached. “Zaktan and Avak report movement in the bedroom; looks like an army is coming.” Takanuva reported. “Get ready.” Later.... “It’s been a few months.” Tahu Stars said. “And because there was no fighting, and no interacting, those few months were seriously boring. So now I’m attacking you.” “Yeah, just hurry up.” Tahu Mata sighed. “I’ll finally regain control, and I’ll do it diplomatically, like before.” “I’m diplomatic!” Tahu Stars protested. Tahu Mata snorted. “Right.” Tahu Mata dodged out of the way as Tahu Stars’ sword came crashing down beside him. He tucked into a roll, swiping behind him as he turned around. “I love gears.” He murmured. He was distracted as Tahu Stars grabbed him furiously, throwing him across the bed. “I don’t need to beat you alone!” the Stars set spat. Takanuva Mistika stepped out of the shadows; a moment later, an Exo-Toa crashed into him, controlled by Lewa Mata. “No, don’t fall off the bed!” the Toa Mata of air screeched. “NOOOO!” A large crash could be heard a second later. Both Tahu’s glanced at each other for a split second before bursting into laughter at their teammate’s stupidity. Meanwhile, Lewa stood to his feet using the Exo-Toa, grumbling to himself. He’d hardly even done a check up before Takanuva Mistika crashed into him, sending him tumbling into the dresser. The right arm of the Exo-Toa fell off, leaving Lewa Mata to grab for his axe. “This thing falls apart so easily.” He muttered. “Never fear, Lewa!” Onua Mata shouted. “We’re here!” Takanuva turned at the voice, and his eyes narrowed; Gali and Onua Mata had also gotten into Exo-Toa of their own, and were charging towards them. “You think I will not receive help?” Takanuva Mistika laughed. A split second later, the Special Edition Jetrax T6 slammed into him, flying him into the door; several chunks of the titan fell apart, and he collapsed to the ground. However, with a scream, Antroz v2 leapt out of the cockpit, as the impact caused the Special Jetrax to fold and shatter. He jumped straight into the hands of Irnakk, who instantly crushed him before turning to go pulverize someone else. By the Door.... Takanuva Mistika slowly got to his feet, rubbing his head. “Why is it so... small?” he asked. “Missing this?” Maxilos snarled, shoving his giant Avohkii onto his face. “Take that.” Takanuva Mistika went sprawling into the corner as Spinax pounced on him. Growling, Takanuva Mistika grabbed the hound’s head and used it to whip Spinax across the room into Lewa in the Exo-Toa before turning and stabbing Maxilos with his staff. “Now who’s powerful?” Takanuva Mistika whispered, using his staff to lift Maxilos high off the ground. “I think I am.” Maxilos squirmed, managing to fall to the ground. He fell straight into the hands of Roodaka, who tore at his armour with her claw. “It’s time we finished our quarrel.” She hissed. Maxilos silently turned, slamming his staff into her face. Even as he did so, Takanuva Mistika fired several Midak spheres at him, causing the robot to stumble, allowing Roodaka to catch him and throw him to the ground. “MAXILOS!” Lewa Mata yelled. The Bed “So, how’s life been?” Tahu Stars asked casually as he and Tahu Mata duelled. “Oh, you, know, the usual.” Tahu Mata replied, ducking as Tahu Stars stabbed at him. “Doing patrols, organizing battle parties, getting ready for war.” “Oh, me too!” Tahu Stars agreed enthusiastically. “We should totally hang out sometime!” “Totes!” Tahu Mata agreed. “Dudes, you guys are dimwits.” Mantax muttered under his breath as he ran by, chased by Takanuva on the Ussanui. The Door If the door hadn’t opened, Maxilos would have been finished. As it was, the door slammed into Takanuva Mistika as he approached, sending him flying into the wall, where he slumped to the ground and didn’t get up. Roodaka and Maxilos both staggered to their feet, scrambling away from the door as it swung open. Lewa, Gali, and Onua Mata all arrived just as the newcomer stepped into the room; he was a hulking, fearsome figure; all black, except for two or three spots of a startling electric blue. “Knock, knock.” He rumbled. He slammed into Maxilos and Roodaka, smashing them both into the dresser. He removed Roodaka’s head personally; Maxilos dodged out of the way in time to avoid that fate. “Uh, who’s there?” Lewa Mata said nervously. The figure replied by grabbing Maxilos and smashing him into Onua’s Exo-Toa; the robot nearly shattered completely, retaining only his general skeleton. He fell to the ground, and the figure focused his attention on the three Toa as Onua stood. “Von Nebula.” He rasped. Lewa Mata gulped, just before Von Nebula leapt forward, grabbing his axe and using it to propel Lewa towards him. “I don’t like this!” Lewa wailed. A second later, he and Onua were flying through the air, crashing into the Axalara and causing it to spin into a crash landing. “Shall I tell them you’re here?” Gali Mata asked. “Tell them who’s- oh, crud!” Tahu Nuva exclaimed. Tahu Nuva ducked away from Von Nebula, whistling. Instantly, Pohatu and Onua Nuva had appeared by his side. They had soon formed into Akamai Nuva. Von Nebula chuckled. “That’s the last time you’ll form that hideous thing.” He told them. As Akamai Nuva rushed forward, Von Nebula used his staff like a baseball bat, slamming it into Akamai Nuva’s body, separating him as he flew through the air. Tahu Nuva and Pohatu Nuva hit the wall first; Pohatu Nuva managed to reform before he hit the ground, rushing forward and tackling Gali Mata away from Von Nebula’s attack. Onua Nuva was not so lucky; he shattered upon impact with the wall, and his pieces rained the ground. Tahu Nuva’s legs snapped off as he landed, and all he could do was sit there. “Run!” he called. The Bed Tahu Mata tackled Tahu Stars, and ripped the usurper’s sword out of his hands. “Give me that.” He muttered, taking the golden shield. “Now, I am re-gaining control.” Tahu Stars grinned. “Maybe not.” A second later, Tahu Mata had been sent flying into the wall. His vision blurry, he just made out Tahu Stars being slammed into the wall beside him. “Who is that?” the Stars toa asked groggily. “I am Von Nebula!” the figure roared. “YOU WILL FEAR MY WRATH!” How is it? Yes, it is incomplete; where it ends is where I decided that I wasn't satisfied with what I was writing, and began writing the chapter again, saving this for the eventual day I would get a blog - today. ~Classical~
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