Keizah the Kaleidoscope Posted October 6, 2012 Share Posted October 6, 2012 Okay, is anyone else getting serious Noatak/Tarrlok vibes from the Ihkav brothers? Knowing Kytan's long-term future, the nightmare sequence in the beginning is both heartwarming and bitingly ironic. I've always had a thing for stories that involve dreamscapes, particularly as a way of showing hidden fears and complexes (a good example would be Bryan Davis' "Echoes From the Edge" trilogy).As for Xyla's part...wow. Just wow. Her fear of expectations and self-hate are so raw and realistic. You must be writing from some sort of personal experience to capture those feelings so well. Quote [æzɚæθ mɛtriɔn zɪnθos] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted October 6, 2012 Author Share Posted October 6, 2012 Actually, I got Ikhav brother vibes from Noatak/Tarrlok. But...yeah, the stories are pretty similar. I could say "great minds think alike," but it'd be cliche. At least I managed to get the irony through!I've had the idea for the dream scenario for a while (ever since seeing Inception, really), though I didn't set down many details until just recently. We won't see everyone's nightmares or mental landscapes, but I wanted to show a few because it seems like an excellent chance for character development. Genakex and Xyla were my first picks because, obviously, I need to build their relationship, and I'm also going to show something with Takashi and Samuko since they're only around for this arc. There's also going to be another nightmare for a character you may not expect...I think most people have something they don't like about themselves, so I wanted Xyla to be easy to relate to. My own experiences are nowhere near as intense, but even a minor base in reality helps makes a character feel more real. This scene is also a hint towards something to come, but I don't want to say any more about that just yet, heheheh...I'm going to try to kick myself into starting Chapter 32 today, but with Pokemon White Version 2 coming out on Sunday, I may be dropping off the face of the Internet for a while. Also, I'll be away next weekend, so that could delay things a bit, but I will definitely do my best to focus on writing more Kako! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 Chapters 32 and 33 were both awesome and a little freaky - A King Bohrok with that kind of power? Plus insanity? I foresee Genaxex's first real King battle rather soon...Phaenyx, who was sleeping on the other side of the lobby, sat up and yawned. “Man, that was a weird dream. Good nap, though. Strange place to fall asleep…but…wait, what happened?”Figures - it takes Phaenyx a minute to understand the peculiarity of randomly falling asleep while walking.Not to mention, a look at the Fourth Forbidden Thought! Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenore Posted November 10, 2012 Share Posted November 10, 2012 Abomination is now officially my favorite King Bohrok. His insanity is well done, he's not a raving lunatic like most insane characters are portrayed as. Also Cerebral Vortex is pretty cool, I'm glad I chose it. Quote Blog "A Cask of Amontillado": Breaking News Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted November 25, 2012 Author Share Posted November 25, 2012 Abomination's glad to see there are some people who understand him. Chapter 34 is up, and we find out that the King of Kohrak is even freakier in person. This is a far more serious battle than the fight with Voyager... Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keizah the Kaleidoscope Posted November 25, 2012 Share Posted November 25, 2012 (edited) I agree with Nevermore. Abomination's insanity is subtle enough to not be overly distracting, yet still unusual enough to be disturbing. It's a sort of reasoned madness that reminds me of the Joker or Vezon.Although I have to wonder, with some of the quotes from this chapter...is his Va Champion some kind of receptionist or telemarketer? It's just he makes a lot of references to telephones and "business".EDIT: Oh dear, is my COT showing? Edited November 25, 2012 by Keizah the Kaleidoscope Quote [æzɚæθ mɛtriɔn zɪnθos] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted November 25, 2012 Author Share Posted November 25, 2012 I hadn't actually put much thought into the Abomination Va, but now that you mention it...that would make a lot of sense. I didn't realize how many business references I was putting in there. And now I have this strange image of Abomination in a suit...*shakes head*Anyway, I've kind of started on Chapter 35, but I may not get anywhere quickly. Hopefully it shouldn't take too long, though--the pace will likely pick up about mid-December. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted November 26, 2012 Share Posted November 26, 2012 Well, another thing on Kytan's worry list - Genakex's rage. Poor kid... I have to say, Abomination is quite the crowd favorite.Hope Xyla gets herself together, though *enters old-man-sage mode* I foresee... *puffs on pipe* some trouble ahead for her...Oh, and I'm puttin' 50 widgets saying that Phaenyx woulda rained down some serious damage if not for that damnable shield of Abomination's... Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keizah the Kaleidoscope Posted November 26, 2012 Share Posted November 26, 2012 Actually...I was just rereading the last couple chapters, and I think I'm starting to understand why Titan reacted so emotionally to Abomination's actions. If you think about it, the Bahrag queens are responsible for the creation of the Krana and the majority of the Bohrok. This means that they function as parent figures to the Bohrok, especially the Kal (who they personally created). So from Titan's point of view, Abomination killed his "mothers" in cold blood. Quote [æzɚæθ mɛtriɔn zɪnθos] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted November 26, 2012 Author Share Posted November 26, 2012 The kids have some tough times ahead for sure...Due to Elemental resistance, Phaenyx's Shadow attacks were all cut to a level below what the King Bohrok Carapace can nullify, so Abomination broke out the Krana Ca to be extra careful. Without that, though, you're right--Phaenyx would have cut that freak to pieces.I've been trying to find the best way to phrase it, and I think you just did, Keizah! I may slip that into the story if you don't mind. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted December 11, 2012 Share Posted December 11, 2012 Okay, Zane will be a pretty cool addition to the team. I also like how his personality and his Spirit match - Did you choose that Nevermore?Also, I am officially scared of Meu... Mutrei... Okay I can't bloody remember how to spell it. But you get who I'm talking about. She is also my fave Shadow Consortium member as of this moment. Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lenore Posted December 11, 2012 Share Posted December 11, 2012 Yeah, a lot of his Spirits are like that. His fighting style is spot on, just how I wanted it. She certainly lives up to her name but I think it's a bit early to pick favorites. We've only seen a few of the Consortium higher ups in any detail. Quote Blog "A Cask of Amontillado": Breaking News Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 11, 2012 Author Share Posted December 11, 2012 I've taken to calling her "Meut" for short. I intend to show more with all the Division Heads and other Consortium leaders soon to make them more interesting, though due to the rules we won't see them battling all that much. Most of them have at least been seen by now, and Science Divison Head Contrivance will make an appearance during the Le-Isle arc. All that's left is Shock Trooper Division Head Kain--his Division will be involved on Ga-Isle, but I may give him an appearance during Le-Isle. Chapter 36 has Genakex's battle against Stratoro and Chapter 37 will be Kytan's fight--both are written and I just need to get to typing them. Chapter 38 will be the start of Le-Isle! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keizah the Kaleidoscope Posted December 11, 2012 Share Posted December 11, 2012 (edited) Well, this is strange. My post from earlier magically disappeared (or modgically?). Good thing the division head can't act on their own, otherwise Meutriere probably would have assassinated Kytan's group already (especially considering that she can apparently shoot targets half a continent away). And Meutriere's personality is brilliant. It seems that a lot of "assassin" characters in fan fiction tend to run their mouths too much, making it hard to believe that they went through the necessary training to be professional killers. Meut, on the other hand, seems to have a degree of professional detachment, as well as the patience for long stakeouts. Edited December 11, 2012 by Keizah the Kaleidoscope Quote [æzɚæθ mɛtriɔn zɪnθos] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 11, 2012 Author Share Posted December 11, 2012 My thoughts exactly. I figured there should at least be a cannon reason why none of the Division Heads are let off the leash, other than "it would be a really short story otherwise". Looks like Meut's a real fan-favorite! I'll keep that in mind going forward! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keizah the Kaleidoscope Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 (edited) Okay, Mahi trail: I just saw the Exo Vahki archetype in the spirit index, and I have to say that it's an impressive design. I love how most of them are fairly viable on their own, but gain new techniques in a fusion chain. Also, I guess we can add "Perfect Dispel" and "Fatal Wound" to the list of methods to kill Cain. Alright, back to the future Kako. It's good to see that the Element Lords can still put up a fight against Kytan, although it seems that they might be trying harder in order to give Kytan a challenge. Also, I'm geeking out over the additional background for Nuvakuta and Zagrin, as well as the implication that they could actually become stronger than the original Element Lords. Edited December 20, 2012 by Keizah the Kaleidoscope Quote [æzɚæθ mɛtriɔn zɪnθos] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 21, 2012 Author Share Posted December 21, 2012 After the King Bohrok and the Seven Deadly Rahkshi, I figured the Vahki were due for a new look. Well, Kytan's a tougher challenger, so it makes sense they'd try a little harder.Since Nuvakuta and Zagrin and their family/ies have become so important, I figured I should at least toss them a mention in Kako. Adding Takashi and Samuko was done to make it seem a little more relevant. Kako 38, the first chapter of Le-Isle, is fully written, I just need to get to typing it--should be up today or tomorrow. Not sure how my work will be affected over Christmas--I won't be having any relatives over, but I will be getting a few new games, so... Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted December 30, 2012 Share Posted December 30, 2012 Dear God Mata Nui... Exo, can you channel living peoples spirits or something, cos that joke of Phaenyx's is something I'd say! The Air-Lord seems a lotta fun, too And a very well written battle. However, *looks sideways at Exo* would you have oh-so-happened to have made a minor reference to Origins? Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 30, 2012 Author Share Posted December 30, 2012 Sometimes even I do not understand my own powers...<.<>.>As for an Origins reference...maybe... Chapter 39 is almost done, will definitely be up this week! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted January 31, 2013 Share Posted January 31, 2013 Go Xyla! Two birds, one stone - beat the Air-Lord and get a confidence boost! Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted February 12, 2013 Author Share Posted February 12, 2013 Indeed, it's a big moment for Xyla! Chapter 42 is up, showing another conversation between Kytan and Tahra. I was going to hold on to what I reveal here until Ga-Isle, but I thought it made more sense to start here and go more in-depth later on. Hope you guys like it! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted February 13, 2013 Share Posted February 13, 2013 (edited) With this chapter, you have cemented my suspicions, good sir! Fear not, however, I shalt not tell a soul what mine opinion is... Amazing, I thought my typing processor would have a fit with that sentence... In any case, yet another well... y'know what, every chapter you write is well-written. I'm gonna start randomizing words just to get outta that slump... Can't wait for the next chapter! E: Why so many new sentences, I know not... Edited February 13, 2013 by Phoenixian Wraith Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Feel free to take a guess, just know that I can't confirm a whole lot just yet. Chapter 43 is finally up, sorry it took so long. I was hesitant since this finally shows us how Element-Lords transfer their titles, which is kind of important. It also introduces a new guest star, starting us on the next part of the Le-Isle arc. Also, since we now have an official Jungle prefix, Flora-Isle is officially being changed to Bo-Isle. And I might have a new Spirit ready soon. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted March 4, 2013 Share Posted March 4, 2013 Oh dear Mata-Nui, what in the name of the High Council have I unleashed upon thine world? Or, translated... What the heck have I created? A rather exquisite look into the background of Elemental-Lord transferal too... though I'm glad Kytan set Phaenyx straight. A marvelous chapter, indeed. And yes, this will be a test to see how many praising words I know. Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted March 25, 2013 Author Share Posted March 25, 2013 Sorry for the dealy, but Chapter 44 is finally up. It's mostly explanation about the castle and what the Consortium is doing there, so I'll try to be quick about Chapter 45 so you won't be in suspense too long! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 Another superb chapter, Exo. And it comes with it's own beautiful reference, haha. Though I can't help but wonder if I've seen a character like Contrivance... Still maintain there's a Afro'd skeleton in that mansion somewhere though. Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted June 24, 2013 Author Share Posted June 24, 2013 So much for quick...I'm sorry it took me so long to get Chapter 45 up. I've made a serious dent into Chapter 46, though, so hopefully I can get a few more chapters out before my lack of motivation rears its ugly head. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted June 24, 2013 Share Posted June 24, 2013 YES! Another chapter! Found a error, though. Frieza dodged and moved in to punch, but win beams of energy came out of nowhere and struck him down. Not sure what that's meant to be but yeah. Pointing that out. That's right Xyla, mistakes are to be learnt from... though Zane seems paranoid of Ren. Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted June 24, 2013 Author Share Posted June 24, 2013 That's supposed to be "twin". Thanks, I'll fix that now. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keizah the Kaleidoscope Posted June 25, 2013 Share Posted June 25, 2013 (edited) Glad to hear your motivation's back. I know that feeling of apathy better than I sometimes care to admit.As you often do, you adapted my vague ideas better than I'd expected. Ren and Trynahk turned out very well, especially Ren's advice to Xyla. Edited July 6, 2013 by Keizah the Kaleidoscope Quote [æzɚæθ mɛtriɔn zɪnθos] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted July 5, 2013 Author Share Posted July 5, 2013 Thanks! Kako 46 is up, showing what happened to Zane and beginning another battle deep in the heart of the castle! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phoenixian Wraith Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 W... wha... wha... no afro-headed-skeleton? (Shadow-y and mysterious voice) So, one of the Brothers... has been found. Who... is next...? (end) Go kick Genesect's backside, Nidovikk! Another superb chapter. Quote Bioni-Lords Origins = BZRPG Character Profiles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted July 28, 2013 Author Share Posted July 28, 2013 (edited) Chapter 47 is finally up. Hoping to get 48 out soon, because I really want to be done with Le-Isle and move on with the story. Also, with the Archives closing down, I need to come to a decision about what to do with Books 1 and 2. I made a proposal in my latest blog entry, but if you have any alternative ideas, please let me know! Edited July 28, 2013 by Pahrak #0579 Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 23, 2013 Author Share Posted December 23, 2013 *blows dust off topic* Does this thing still work...? Ahaha...it's been a while, hasn't it? Well, I've gone into detail and apologized about that over on my blog, so I'll skip that part. Kako 49 is finally up! Ren has a conversation with Riken to try to figure out some details about the castle, and Leanga has his first Orb Battle as Air-Lord. Since I was...away from Bioni-Lords for such a long time, I'm sort of out of the swing of things, but I'm going to try to get back on-track and get the story rolling again. I'm a little concerned about how the rest of Le-Isle is going to go, but since Ga-Isle is a fresh arc, hopefully any lasting effects of my unintentional hiatus will have worn off by then. Although, as I mentioned previously, I've decided to make some rather large changes to the direction Kako is heading, so that might create a few holes...but I'll do my best to minimize that. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToaDraconixMahvi Posted December 10, 2015 Share Posted December 10, 2015 Just posting a quick little message here for you, Pahrak... Its been a long time, and still I read and re-read the first two and what little there is of book three. It has ALSO been a while since you, ah...Went off the grid due to writers block, I guess. In any rate/case, I am wondering.......Have you been wondering, why not just continue on with book 3...Making more chapters and everything, that is...You DIIIID leave us all on one of those Mata Nui be cliffhangers, after all. I know I want that blasted C/h to be removed, in a manner of speaking: A new chapter, just so that the damnable thing is rendered void...I absolutely want to go fallout 3/New Vegas/4 on that cliffhanger with a mini-nuke... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 11, 2015 Author Share Posted December 11, 2015 Well, this is unexpected. Thank you for still being interested! Admittedly I have thought more about Bioni-Lords and what else to do with it, but after the official cancellation I typed up a series of posts infodumping all my plans for the remainder of Book 3 and beyond, so making a new chapter would feel a little pointless now that everything’s spoiled. I’m currently thinking about reworking the idea into a new series called “Amalgam Atlas”, but it’s still in the very early stages so I can’t say when I’ll be able to really start it. (All I have to show right now are two posts, though I have more I might make soon.) I’m sorry for ending Bioni-Lords the way I did—I was under a lot of stress and feeling really discouraged, and a lot of that got funneled directly into Bioni-Lords. But, thank you for still remembering it so fondly! I'm glad to know that the series still means something to someone besides myself! Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToaDraconixMahvi Posted December 11, 2015 Share Posted December 11, 2015 Heh, it WAS a really good series, and in a way, still is, considering tha-waiiit a sec, uhhh...What was that guy who potentially still had that twilight sage stuff? I just remembered about that short story about how Vinxeng got turned into a Sage of Twilight Paths(WHYYY THE NARUTO SHIPPUDEN REFERENCE FAIL?!), and you said there was some person who still had it? Any luck about them? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 11, 2015 Author Share Posted December 11, 2015 (edited) Oh, I completely forgot about that...um, to be perfectly honest, I don't recall who I sent that to. I might have the paper copy somewhere--if I find it, would you like me to type it up and PM it to you? EDIT: I just found the paper copy! (Along with the paper copy of Zenrei's backstory chapter if that interests you.) Edited December 11, 2015 by Pahrak #0579 Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToaDraconixMahvi Posted December 11, 2015 Share Posted December 11, 2015 (edited) Lawl, how Zenrei and uh...Kotoba met? Meh, I still got a virtual copy. And yeah, the paper copy would be nice to have. Btw, torterra picture? Niiiiiice. erslcayt ratrorte is my ervotafi pokemon. Yep. Try to work that out if ya dare!Edit: Paper copy of teh twilight paths, plz...I STILL HAVE THAT REFERENCE ETERNALLY GOING THROUGH MEH GUD ###### HEAD! RWLRWLRWLRWLRWLRWL!!!(<Thats a reference too. MURLOC GODS ARE AWOKEN!!!!) Also, its bloody 3am for me...Living in FL has disadvantages when you're a gamer. My nose is officially going insane sniffles.Further edit: I almost forgot to mention! Just let me know when its sent. You, uh...do still have the way to send it written somewhere, right?And final edit...This is getting annoying: Oh, and can you make a short story about yume? I know everyone would like to know...Just who is Yume...And for that matter, I run through the spirit index a LOT. Haven't found out who would be the twilight space "Master" is by doing that, so, mind at least doing a few certain short stories? The people I REALLY want short stories of are, as follows: Yume, the other guy with a Bioniclekeyblades who's name I cannot EVER remember, and the 1st Element-Lords. It would be nice to know about those people... Edited December 11, 2015 by ToaDraconixMahvi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pahrak Model ZX Posted December 11, 2015 Author Share Posted December 11, 2015 Sure, I'll type it up and PM it to you--expect it sometime tomorrow! As for Yume, I talked about her in one of the blog posts...it's actually sort of embarrassing, but, ah...back in the day, I wasn't sure what I was doing and decided to introduce a new mysterious character, and, for whatever reason, I decided to just transplant someone from a manga I was reading at the time. The official in-canon explanation is that in some alternate timeline of the Fruits Basket series, the world was destroyed and a character named Hanajima survived and ended up in Twilight Space, where her "Master"--a powerful interdimensional being named the Twilight Monarch--recruited her so that he could influence the Bioni-Lords world without directly interfering. The other BionicleKeyblade-user would be King Syrag, a legendary figure from the Bioni-Lords world's medieval age who used a special technique to defeat a powerful enemy. Each of the Freres was going to have a powerful suicide attack, but it would be revealed that BionicleKeyblade's attack actually sent the user to Twilight Space instead of killing them. Syrag ended up there and became a guardian under the Twilight Monarch's command. I liked the characters I was starting to build for some of the Original Element-Lords, so those people will probably show up in some form in the next iteration. I'd expect to see Norscu, Vitirus, Aile, and Zempyst make a comeback at the very least. As for new stories about them in the Bioni-Lords world...I'm a little hesitant. Quote My Library Right of Law (Epics) KARDAS DRAGON appears! (G&T) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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