Mare Tranquillitatis

Well, before I start I have to say I feel... worthless posting after Zaxvo and Jinklemeister.Alright. On the story. It's a simple plot, but it has a deep meaning: death comes for everyone, you can never know when it will come to you and, above all, to say it in gamer slang, if you're on a killing spree it doesn't mean you're not going to die next time you face someone.Nothing more to say. I simply love this genre of stories: short but intense. Very well done, Darkon! ( as always, I'd say )----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

It surely will, because a new character will be revealed. As for the city, I should have done a better description of it, I agree with you, but I'll fix that in the following chapters. Unfortunately, I think I'll have to delay much more than this time: when I started this epic, the first 5 chapters had already been written in the summer and now, thanks to my laziness, I'll have to do both chapters and homework. Oh well, I'll try to handle that.Glad you enjoyed it, less or more, Darkon ( why do I always write Drakon? ) and thanks for feedback!EDIT: I've corrected the errors that Cederak showed me. Now it should be correct. And chapter 6 is on the way!

First, the answer: never. Do I look like I can be intimitated? :sly:Second, I will never fear B6, now that I've seen his true person. Imagined him more... boss.----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Do not double post. -B6

-Chapter 5: The City- Colors changed from green to yellow, red, pink, blue and white as they approached the City outposts. Sentinels were monitoring the area. However, no one stopped the weird trio: perhaps Aetius was a known and respected person there. But they looked with great attention to the Vorox, thinking that the warrior captured the beast and fearing it would have tried to escape.“So, what do you think about it, Toa?” “It’s… simple and beautiful at the same time. I mean, it hasn’t got great constructions, but its poor appearance makes it something unparalleled.” “Well, it’s still a provisional place. The Toa are searching for better areas to build the true New Atero, even if I agree with you: I prefer cities like this, a little bit irregular and wild. But nothing will be like the original Atero.”Aetius finished his sentence with a sigh, then his old temper took over again and he walked towards the open gates of the city.Inside, they found themselves into a crowded marketplace, with people from everywhere. Different languages filled the air, some asking for a price, others answering, some talking about a matter, others commenting. Stalls offered their products: fruits, vests, furniture, ornaments, swords, armors… Oddly, the Vorox was more interested in furniture than in fruit.Aetius turned to the Toa and stopped him. “Before we go anywhere, I need to buy you something that will be helpful in your journey around the world. I need a weapon for you. You can see some here: choose the one you like most.” “Why are you doing this?” asked perplexed his mate. “Doing what?” “Why are you going to pay it for me?” “First, you have no money. Second, this is a dangerous world. And I don’t like to see anyone dying, less or more, but I’ll explain you later. Third, I’m still of the idea that this beast will betray you. Now, make your choice. Swiftly. We have much to do.”Without replying, the Toa started looking at the weapons. There were different kinds: guns, bows, swords, knives, spears. Often he tried them or tasted their weight, sometimes instead he never gave them a look, especially in the case of the guns. He never liked them - but when?Many of the arms were really good, but only two caught his attention. He liked very much a sword with silver handle and large blade and a big, oval shield which remembered him something of his past life. He made a gesture to Aetius, who neared to examine his choice.“Very well chosen. Nice manufacture, right weight and length, good balance. Alright, give me them, I’m paying.”The Toa obeyed, then turned back to the square, watching the crowd while he waited for Aetius to come. The Vorox stood by his side as it had always done from the time it got saved from certain death.After a few minutes of debates, he bought the weapons for a price he believed reasonable - the seller wouldn’t have agreed - and gave them to their new owner, who put the shield in the left and stored the sword on his back, just like Aetius taught him.“Now you really look like a Toa! Come, let’s find a place for the night. Those clouds will make it rain heavily and I don’t think you’d like to get wet like a fish, nor to sleep with the grass as cover.”The Toa looked where the warrior pointed with his finger: the clouds he saw when he awoke were almost above their heads. The air was still and fresh. A sudden darkness fell on the earth.A storm was coming.

Congrats, Paleo!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Congrats, GSR! As for me, I had a very good time participating to this contest and, considering it's my first time, two votes for Best Use of Tolkienian Inspiration can be enough. Congrats to the other winners, too!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Hey, that's not so bad! I mean, lines are still a bit raw, but the overall is quite good. Maybe 'coz I wouldn't be able to do such a drawing... Anyways, it just needs some improvement to shapes, especially on the mask, then it should be perfect. 8.6/10----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Oh. Rest in peace, Heather. But it had to finish this way, one day or another. Death is the only thing we will all share and there's nothing to do. All we can do is to hope it is really just another path. And I sincerelly pray for her it is.----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

^Hey, thanks, fishers64!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Let's hope she will be found, it's always sad to see someone missing...----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

It is just epic. It made me think about the countless hours spent playing with the so loved robots which fought each other to rule the universe, the many Christmas's, when I stood on a chair waiting to find out who, hero or villain, was waiting for me under the shining tree, the long days I spent on the official site, trying to get part of the meaning of the words using a dictionary.BIONICLE hasn't been just part of my life. It has been my life. And I won't forget it.Thanks to AdvanceCopenaghen for bringing us an interesting picture showing the intense work behind LEGO's line we liked, like and always will like.----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

I hope it will, Tazakk. Thanks for feedback, everyone!

Wow, first!Anyways, I like the color scheme and the way you built the MG's. I dunno where it is from, but I absolutely love this. I wish I had one!9.7/10P.S: I've just seen you're the good, old Felix the Cat. Well, you did an excellent work as always!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

^ Alright, let's start answering. About grammar errors, all I can say is that I'm Italian, so my English isn't so good, and I often forget to give the work a look to find errors. Then, on the writing style. I get inspired by LotR and stuff, but definitely not by the Wizard of Oz, so I think it's obvious it seems outdated. The length of the chapters depends on the fact I'm lazy, I have to admit...What's next? Ah, the characters. Well, Aetius is a particular type of Glatorian and the Toa is a canon one; as for the curse, it will affect two of them later, together with three other new characters. However, I can't tell more 'coz it would be spoiling.Oh, yes, 'bout the link to this topic from the epic. I didn't even think about that and I could be doing that, but I think it would ruin the continuity of the text. Anyways, thanks for the tip.Well, it was nice to see a ECC critic here, who also enjoyed reading my epic! Keep an eye on it if you want to see some twist in the plot!Many heartfelt thanks for the precious feedback!

Reviewed. Thank you for choosing the ECC! -CedI must thank you!Thanks so much!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

This is it:1) Team Curse2) Review topic3) 4 chapters, now by now.----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Thanks, Darkon!So, to answer your comment, I have to say the forest will probably appear again in the story, but it will be a brief appearance. However, the source of its power will be fundamental for the plot. Then, on New Atero. You'll read more in chapter 5, but I don't know how long it will be featured in the storyline. I think 5,6 and 7 will be surely set there. Now by now I can't tell something more certain. I just hope I'll have the time to write 'em... duh... in time.Anyways, glad you enjoyed it! Chapter 5 ready and to be posted soon!

I'd only say I like it, 'coz it speaks for itself...----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

HF never on these screens. BZP was meant for BIONICLE, lets stay on BIONICLE. No to HFP.----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Ditto.----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Well, thanks for the efforts. I'll have to get someone teachin' me!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

I...think I fixed it. Not quite sure. That was a really odd thing with all the colors and what-not.EDIT: Hey, I did. And Zarayna didn't. I feel so proud of myself. Thanks to both, I'm not so practical with those formats!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Here it is:[url=http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=3761]SSC #9 Entry: I Will Return[/url] - Lord of the RingsHope I did the format the right way...Thanks very much!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth

Really fun, I liked it, especially the "Vamos!" scene!----- Lord of the Rings -----Titles: Dark Lord, Lord of Mordor, Lord of Gifts, Lord of Barad-Dûr, Lord of the Earth