ToaKapura1234

OOC: I'm guessing that was a widget paying for somebody's drink. IC: Bok Bok reached out and put his hand on the metal. It then turned into pure energy and went into Bok's hand. "This whole Toa thing is awesome." he said

1.It’s very important, especially with a script format, to explain where the story is taking place, especially before the dialogue starts. I'll try to do better about this, maybe add an introduction narrated by Vakama in each chapter. 2.However, there were a few small continuity errors; for instance, most of the Turaga are referred to as senile, but don’t really appear to be. Are they really senile, or is this just the opinions of the Toa? The most senile Turaga is obviously Vakama, but I think Onewa and Matau are a little bit also. Everyone just thought Nuju was crazy until Matoro showed up and translated. I'll try to flesh out their senility a bit more. 3.Also, how old is the kid, and why haven’t his parents noticed all of his Lego toys running around? "you're his presents for his seventh birthday" Tahu, Chapter 9. As for the parents, the legos just all instinctively play dead when humans of any age approach. 4.The Toa obviously have use of their mask powers; what about their elemental ones? (seriously, an episode about setting the rug on fire would be hilarious.) Yeah, I guess, I'm kind of subconciously going the LoMN route there. I'll try to use their powers more. 5.But other characters, including Tahu, still feel generic. Spend some time and develop other quirks for these characters. I'll do my best on this, but like you said, I'll try not to overdo it. 6.More than once you’ve taken a common staple of comedies and turned it sideways into a new joke (I’m referring to Turaga Matau’s leet-speak; usually when it’s seen in comedies it’s a sign of either immaturity or bad spelling, but you manage to make it really funny.) Thank you, I'll be sure to keep doing this. 7.Most of your humor seems to come from the fact that the characters are living toys who believe they’re the real things, a la Buzz Lightyear (which is referenced at the end of one of the later chapters) Yet they also refer to happy meals, the front yard, and cabins like they are perfectly normal, everyday occurrences. And what do they think of the “giant” that logically shouldn’t exist in their story? Actually, they never called it a happy meal and by the time they're talking about basements, ebay, yards, and cabins, they've learned a little bit about humans. 8.Do they have to hide from the parents? Have their elemental powers caused trouble before? Do they terrorize any pets? And what about the characters themselves? How deep are their backgrounds, their personalities. What about the kid? Does he simply serve to provide plot points, or will he have a greater impact on the story (he’s obviously old enough to use eBay...) I know this slightly contradicts what I said earlier about the shorts chapters, but consider it a challenge. Or just do some longer, some shorter chapters based on what is happening in the scene. Again, I'll try to increase character development. 9.This may seem like a tall order, but it will really help your comedy grow. Providing greater background also provides more opportunity for jokes, especially noodle incidents. I recommend diving into the archives and reading Dominus Temporis’ comedy My Life With The Bionicles. Not only is it similar to yours (living toys in a house) but it’s also a great example of writing overall. (WARNING: it will log you out in the process, though.)Long story short, you’re doing a good job so far: Now do better. Thanks, but for some reason the archives don't work with my computer 10. By the way, are you aware that (according to my calculator) the answer to the mathematical probability in chapter 10 is 0%? Was that intentional? Technically it's 0.00000000000000000000000001% (which most calculators will round to zero) and yes it was intentional. Thank you for the review.

IC: Bok "Eaten?" asked Bok. "What eats a sword?"

OOC: K, that's cool. IC: Bok "Woah, cool." said Bok as his wound healed. "So can I just create metal or could I control metal that already exists like my hammer?"

OOC: Well, sorry, but in my defense he can't remember anything other than his name. And how to talk. In BIONICLE if you get amnesia you never forget how to talk. Weird. IC: Bok Bok focused as hard as he could. He then created a metal spike that was piercing into his hand. "Augh!" yelled Bok as he pulled out the spike.

IC: Bok "And how exactly would I go about doing that?"

IC: Bok "Okay, thanks." said Bok as he followed Voxumo. "But what was your friend saying about me having elemental powers or something like that?" he asked.

IC: Bok "Still, it just seems cruel. Well, what's done is done. Would you mind leading me to some shelter, I've been out in this heat for at least 3 hours?"

IC: Bok "If it's infected, I'm guessing that means that it's not it's fault it attacked me. Which means we should be helping it, not slicing its tail off."

IC: Bok "I woke up in the hot desert and I saw shelter in the form of that village. I started walking towards it and got attacked by that...thing with the rusty masks."

IC: Bok (to Voxumo) "Don't remember anything before at all, except my name. Bok."

IC: Bok "What do you mean, my element? Do I have special powers or something? The last thing I remember is waking up in the desert with this big hammer next to me. I then started heading toward the village when this big scorpion-thing attacked me." Edit: OOC: I'm working on getting a MOC of Bok on the profile page.

IC: Bok Bok brought his hammer crashing down on the Nui-Jaga, knocking off one of its masks.

IC: Bok While Bok was walking toward Po-Koro, he got attacked by a Nui-Jaga. "Help!" he called as loud as he could.

How is it that I have over 100 views and only one non-chapter reply? Oh, well. On to the next chapter. Chapter 10: The Alarm Clock of the Bahrag Vakama: Well, did you finish replacing all of the masks at yours suvas with the silver ones? Tahu Nuva: Yes, we all did. But why did you want us to do that? Vakama: Because your masks turned silver in the storyline. Nokama: Since the Toa Nuva have stronger mask poweres and the Toa not-Nuva have stronger element powers, you should work together. Tahu and Tahu Nuva: No way! Nokama: The Matoran grow uneasy. They begin to think that a fight is inevitable and don't know who to trust anymore. Working together would gain both teams the confidence of the Matoran. Tahu: Fine. Tahu Nuva: Even though I still think it was you guys that tried to imprison us in our canisters, I guess I'll work with you. *The Toa and Toa Nuva then split into teams of three to find the Kal* Lewa Nuva: There, I see one. Lehvak-Kal: Actually there's three of us. But honestly I'm too lazy to fight you guys, Gahlok's too busy staring at her reflection and Kohrak's listening to music. Gahlok-Kal: How many times do I have to tell you?! It's Gahlok-Kal. Kohrak-Kal: Another one bites the dust. And another one down- Gali Nuva: Kopaka Nuva and Lewa Nuva, I have an idea. Let's form a Kaita. Lewa Nuva: I brought the instruction booklet. Gali Nuva, Lewa Nuva, and Kopaka Nuva: Spirit of wisdom, hear me! Wairuha Nuva: I am Wairuha Nuva. Lehvak-Kal: Well, if you want a fight- Bohrok-Kal Kaita Ja: You'll get it! For I or is it we? Oh whatever. I am Bohrok-Kal Kaita Ja. Wairuha Nuva: That's a mouthful. Why not just Ja-Kal? Bohrok-Kal Kaita Ja: Because Bohrok-Kal Kaita Ja sounds cooler. Wairuha Nuva: Whatever. Let's get this party started. *meanwhile Tahu, Tahu Nuva, and Onua Nuva were leading all six of the Bohrok. Tahu: Why do you fit in the Exo-Toa, but not my Onua. Onua Nuva: *shrugs from inside the Exo-Toa* Nuhvok-Kal: Hello, Toa. *uses gravity powers to make Bohrok fly into the air and Tahu Nuva get stuck to the ground* Tahu Nuva: Let me guess, "You are the Kal. We will be assimilated. Resistance is futile"? Nuhvok-Kal: No, I don't have time to assimilate you, I'll just destroy you! Tahu: Onua Nuva, you go left, I'll go right. Onua Nuva: *nods* Nuhvok-Kal: The probability of you defeating me is approximately [(pi + i^2 - 128/64) x 1/(pi + i^2 - 128/64)/100000000000000000000000000]%. In short, the odds may not ever be in your favor. *Ja and Nuhvok won their fights while Kohrak and Tahnok defeated the other two teams* Tahu: Quick, follow the Exo-Toa. Exo-Toa: *runs to basement without Onua Nuva in it* *The 4 teams unite and decide to send the two Lewas on a scouting mission into the basement* Lewa Nuva: The Exo-Toa are fighting the Kal! Lewa: And losing. Let's go. Tahu Nuva: After hearing the report of the Lewas, Tahu and I have decided we should go stop the Kal. *The Toa and Toa Nuva then descended into Mangaia/the basement/the Bohrok nests* Tahu Nuva: They're about to awaken the queens. Vakama: Use the Vahi, Tahu. Tahu Nuva: Oh right. Lewa: Vakama is that you? Vakama: No. *Huna wears off* Heh, heh *runs away* Tahu Nuva: *switches mask to Vahi and tries to freeze time. Gali Nuva: Oh, no! They all have rare white metal Krana-Kal! Tahu: Overload the Nuva symbols! Tahu Nuva: You heard him! Toa Nuva, channel your power into the Nuva symbols. Tahnok-Kal: *gets blasted into an outlet and electrocuted* Gahlok-Kal: *gets magnetized to the fridge* Kohrok-Kal: *gets blasted into subwoofer, which then activates and blasts his pieces everywhere* Lehvak-Kal: *goes flying out window* Pahrak-Kal: *gets blasted down a vent* Nuhvok-Kal: *goes bouncing around the room until all of his pieces fly apart* Tahu Nuva: Hey, nice job. Tahu: You too. Tahu Nuva: Hey, where'd you get the idea to overload the Nuva symbols? Tahu: I came up with it. Lewa: No, you didn't, you got it from the comics. Tahu: Or that. End Chapter 10 The Finale of Season 1 Approacheth

IC: Bok Bok woke up in the middle of the Motara Desert remebering nothing but his name. He picked up the hammer that lay next to him, assuming it was his and wandered off toward what looked like a village in the distance.

Chapter 9: The Day the Power Died Tahnok Va: Okay, I finished organizing all the Krana, how are the Kal coming? Gahlok Va: Almost done building them. By the way, they're Krana-kal Pahrak Va: Are you sure, they'll awaken the queens? Tahnok Va: Of course they will. Now let's finish them and get out of here. Tahnok-Kal: Ah, it's a beautiful day, the sun is shining, I'm awake- I'm awake?! This means the Bahrag are asleep! Yo, Kal, listen up. Kohrak-Kal: Whatever *goes over to drawer, finds ipod and earbuds and starts listening to music. Pahrak-Kal: Uh, what's da problem, boss? Nuhvok-Kal: Have any of you seen my calculator? Gahlok-Kal: Oh, boys, aren't I just beautiful. Lehvak-Kal: Yeah, whatever Gahlok. Gahlok-Kal: Gahlok-Kal! Tahnok-Kal: Quit fighting! Everyone listen up! Kohrak-Kal: Stayin' alive. Stayin' alive. Ah, ah, ah, ah, stayin' alive. Tahnok-Kal: Looks like someone's ipod needs to have a circuit fried. *blasts electricity at Kohrak-Kal which misses and hits an outlet causing a power outage* *Earlier that day* Tahu: He only likes you guys because you're his presents for his seventh birthday. You're new. Tahu Nuva: va Tahu: No, new, not nu. Whatever. Tahu Nuva: Yeah, we're new and better than you. *power goes out* Tahu: Ah, this stinks. Vakama: I propose a contest. Both teams try to restore the power and whoever doesn't fix the problem listens to the legend of Mata Nui. Tahu: Count me in. Tahu Nuva: I'm in. Besides the legend isn't that annoying. Tahu: Unless he's telling his version . Pohatu: Hey guys I found a flashlight. Tahu: Okay, you use it since you're the only one of us with two hands. Toa: 1 Nuva: 0 Tahu Nuva: *conjures flame in front of him* I make my own light. Gali: Let's head to the fuse-box. Vakama: The two teams then separated. The Toa decided to start by going to the fuse box. Onewa: Why are you narrating what's happening right now, you old coot? Vakama: Who you calling coot? Onewa: Eh, I don't know, I forgot. Vakama: Oh, um what were we talking about? *light returns* Vakama: What happened? Nuparu: *walks up from basement* I was right by the fuse box, so I just flipped the switch. Matau: U noob! U ruined the contest! Vakama: I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I liked tree-speak better. Pohatu: *rushes to the scene using his Kakama* The Nuva symbols are gone! To be Continued

And now, the continuation Chapter 8: The Toa Nooba Tahu: "Tahu Nuva"? Lewa: It's finally happenned. The irrational fear I developed when we discovered we were legos has come true. Lego is replacing us! Tahu: Calm down, you don't know that for sure. Let's just build these "Toa Nuva" and see what they have to say. *The six Toa each build their respective Nuva* Tahu Nuva: What happened? *gets hit on the head with a rock* What's this thing? *picks up rock* Vakama: According to the new comic and the Bohrok online animations, that's your Nuva symbol. Tahu: The new comic got here and you didn't tell us!? Uh, anyway, I'm Tahu Tahu Nuva: I'm afraid you're mistaken, little dude that looks like me. I am Tahu. Tahu: No, you're Tahu Nuva, whatever that means. Tahu Nuva: The last thing I remember is defeating the Bahrag and falling into a container of silvery liquidy stuff. Vakama: That stuff transformed you and your team into the Toa Nuva. You now have increased power, foolery, and stupidity or whatever, et cetera, et cetera, blah, blah, blah. Tahu Nuva: Oh, cool. TOA! ASSEMBLE! Toa Nuva: *assemble* Lewa Nuva: I don't see "a cymbal". Tahu Nuva: How many times do I have to tell you?! None of your jokes are funny! No one likes you! Lewa Nuva: Wow, harsh. Gali Nuva: I like Lewa. Pohatu Nuva: I think we should all be friends. Onewa: Hippie! Lewa: Hi fatty. Pohatu: Am I as fat as this Nuva guy? Lewa: Yes. Pohatu: Oh. Tahu: Hi, welcome to the house? Kopaka Nuva: Are you clones of us or something? Vakama: *explains in a very Vakama-esque style the concept of being toys* Tahu Nuva: So we're like you, but better. Tahu: Oh no, you didn't. Tahu Nuva: Oh, yes I did. Tahu: Oh, it's on. Matau: U guyz r noobs Tahu Nuva: Are not! Matau: Yes u is Tahu Nuva: Are not! Lewa: I wish Matau had never discovered leet speak. End Chapter 8

Note: No one is not a character, it just means that nobody did that P.S. Nobody isn't a character either Chapter 7: Who Says Boxing is All Faked? Vakama: It was a difficult time for our people. Mighty Tahu and Lewa had fallen and Kopaka now led the Toa with Gali as his deputy. Pohatu: Why has no one made a snarky comment about him speaking in past tense yet? Onewa: Tahu, Lewa, and Matau all got assimilated. Pohatu: Oh, right. Vakama: The Toa stared at their greatest hope and their greatest fear. Kopaka: Please stop, I am trying to concentrate. Gali: Well, I guess we just build the Boxor and Exo-Toa, but not the Bahrag? Pohatu: Sounds good, I'm just glad we're out of that cabin. Vakama: Wooden, Mega-Hut. Onewa: I guess I'll take up the role of snarky comments. I give up. I can't think of one. Onepu: Hey guys, Nuparu here says that he has memories of the Toa being on Mata Nui. Vakama: You built Nuparu with the express permission of our great and powerful leader-ME!? Onepu: He's just a Matoran. Onewa: Vakama, why don't you just go pout in a corner while we come up with a plan to beat the Bohrok. Yes! Snarky comment! Vakama: *walks away muttering to himself* Nuparu: I finished building the Boxor. Kopaka: Thank you Nuparu. Nokama: Now, let's build that Exo-Toa! Move, people. Everyone: *builds Exo-Toa* Swarm: We are the Bohrok. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. Kopaka: Gali, use the Exo-Toa. Nuparu use the Boxor. Jala: *tackles Matau and pulls off his krana* Matau: I'm free-liberated! Onua: *challenges Lewa and Tahu in an epic duel* Nuparu: *starts fighting Bohrok* Turaga: *fight Bohrok Va* Onua: Take off the Krana, Lewa and Tahu. Lewa and Tahu: NOOOOOOO! Onua: Rejoin the light side. Tahu: I'll never join you. Lewa: DITTO! Pohatu: *rips off Kongu's Krana* Tahu: Argh! *rips off krana* Lewa: *same as above* *After the battle the Bohrok escape with the Bahrag* Tahu: We must give pursuit! After them! Vakama: Wait, you should wait until you're all knights in rusty armor. Tahu: What? Nokama: He means wait until there's six Exo-toa. Lewa: Why not just say that? Tahu: He's Vakama. *Some undefined amount of time passes* Hafu: Okay, during my recon mission I saw that- Lewa: Since when did he live here? Tahu: Don't you remember when the giant brought in that CD with him and a Rua right before the Bohrok came? Lewa: No. Hafu: Anyways, I saw that the giant is selling all of the Toa's extra great masks using the mysterious glowing box with an apple on it. Tahu: He's selling our masks on ebay?! Hafu: At least he's not selling the gold ones or the noble ones, right? Lewa: It's the end of the world as we know it. And I don't feel fine. I don't feel fine- Tahu: Lewa, stop singing. Giant: *packs up Kanohi that he's selling* *puts down the boxes for and builds five more Exo-Toa* Vakama: Now that the paladins all have their missile launchers, they can defeat the dragon and save the princess. No one: *replies* Vakama: The brave Toa then mounted up onto, err into the Exo-Toa and went off to defeat the Bahrag and save the Matoran and Turaga, especially brave Vakama. Matau: Why do you speak-talk in past-before tense and third-notfirstorsecond person? Pohatu: Actually Onua and I need to rebuild ourselves because we don't fit. Lewa: I told you to go on a diet. *Later* Tahu: Well this is it. The Bohrok nests. Lewa: How is it that the basement is Mangaia and the Bohrok nests? Tahu: Where would you rather it be? The sewer? *While Tahu and Lewa argued, the rest of the team was already headed down the basement steps* Tahu: Wait for us! Lewa: I think I'll just stay here, since they abandoned me. Tahu: Come on. *The six Toa reach the Bahrag* Bahrag: We are the queens. When you kill us in the TV show, we inexplicably respawan for the movie. Tahu: Whatever. Attack! *An epic battle ensues, but the Manas Bahrag gain the upper hand* Lewa: Whoa Deja Vu. Gali: What? Lewa: The whole starting off well and then losing. But I don't think these guys have remote controls. Bahrag: GIRLS! Lewa: Sorry. Tahu: GUYS, and Gali, DITCH THE SUITS! *The Toa then regain their elemental powers and make a Toa seal, blah, blah, blah. They then victoriously return to the surface* Nuparu: I've reprogrammed the Bohrok to help rebuild the house. Tahu: Aren't you the one that has memories of me on Mata Nui. Nuparu: Yeah, why are you asking? Tahu: *decides to go online and do a little research (he and Kopaka are the only ones that have figured out how to use a computer)* *Another unspecified amount of time passes* Jala: Hey, everybody, Toa Tahu has an announcement! *Everybody gathers* Tahu: Let me get right to the point. I just discovered some disturbing news that none of us had realized before. YOU ARE A TOY! You're a child's plaything! To Be Continued

Chapter 6: Billy the Goat-Dog Tahu: Oh great, now we're trapped in a wooden "mega-hut" with six Bohrok intent on destroying it. Kopaka: Pessimism is illogical and unhelpful. I have a plan to defeat the Bohrok. Tahu: Ooh, what? Kopaka: While you were complaining, I came up with the idea of removing all of the Bohrok's krana and then reprogram the Bohrok. Tahu: How do we get the krana out? Kopaka: I don't know yet. But, I've got to get ready for my date. Tahu: Date?! You?! With who?! Kopaka: Gali *walks away* Tahu: *stares at wall with mouth hanging open in shock* Matoro: Sound the alarm! They got more Bohrok and Krana packs! Tahu: Oh, great. *Everyone but Kopaka and Gali gather for a meeting* Nuju: Click Clackity Clickity Clack Matoro: Nuju says that the Bohrok now each have one of each type of Krana. He saw them open the boxes. He also says that they were building some small Matoran/Bohrok hybrids. Maku: Matoran-Bohrok hybrids? Onewa: Yes, they are the legendary Goat-dogs. It was foretold in the prophecies that they would aid in the destruction of the island and would would be led by Billy the brown. Vakama, Nokama, and Whenua: What prophecies? Matoro: Nuju says the boxes said "Bohrok Va" Lewa: I think I'll just call them billy goats like Onewa said. Onewa: The prophecies can only be seen from the Po-wahi desert when you stare at the sun. Nokama: I think you've stared at the sun enough for today, Onewa. Tahu: So- *Tahu gets interrupted as the Bohrok and Bohrok Va crash the meeting* Bohrok and Bohrok Va: We are the Bohrok. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. Tahu: Seriously, what is assimilation? Tahnok Va: This! * runs towards the wall, bounces off of it and backflips over to Tahu* Tahu: Hey, give back my mask! Tahnok: *launches Krana at Tahu* Bohrok, Tahu, and Bohrok Va: We are the Bohrok. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. Matau: Run-flee! Lehvak Va: *grabs Matau* Everybody else: *runs away* Lehvak: *rolls into Kongu and knocks off his mask* Lewa: I'll save you! *rushes in only to get assimilated as well* To Be Continued

Note: When I say Narrator, I mean Vakama narrating, as opposed to Vakama in the flashback P.S. It's on purpose that Vakama calls the Toa Matoran, I mean I did it on purpose, not Vakama Chapter 5: Beware the Swarm of Mosquitoes Tahu: *slaps Mosquitoes that are buzzing around his face* Ugh, how did this place get so infested with Mosquitoes? Lewa: Oh, boy story time! I'll tell you. Tahu: Lewa, I was being rhetorical, I know how it happened. Lewa: I'm gonna tell the story anyway. Once upon a time,- Tahu: Lewa, that's no way to start a story! We're not princesses! I'll start it. It all began 3 days ago when- Vakama: No, no, no! I'm the official storyteller, I'll tell it! Tahu: Fine. Lewa: Hey, everybody storytime! *All of the Toa, Turaga, and Matoran gather to listen to Vakama* Vakama: A long time ago- Tahu: Actually, it was just last Tuesday. Vakama: Who's telling this story?! Tahu: Sorry. Vakama: A long time ago in a land far, far away-MOSQUITO WARS Tahu: Actually, it happened here. Vakama: That's it, one more word out of you, and I'm going to give you a timeout. Tahu: Oh yay, then I don't have to hear the story! Vakama: On second thought, if anyone else interrupts me, they have to listen to the long version of the Legend Mata Nui, write it down, take a quiz, and listen to it again. Everyone:... Narrator Vakama: Good, now where was I? Ah, yes. Gathered friends, let us listen for the first time to the legend of the mosquitoes. In the time before time, six mysterious canisters arrived at this big giant mega-hut thingy. Oh, yes, Mega-Hut, I like that. These canisters contained mysterious creatures called Bohrok. Each Bohrok had a different power, but they all had one purpose- to destroy the Mega-Hut. The innocent Matoran unknowingly built these Bohrok, thinking they might be allies, but much to our horror, they were not. *Begin flashback* Kopaka: There are six new canisters, perhaps they are more Toa? Tahu: They look more like rahi. Gali: Maybe we should ask the Turaga? Lewa: Let's just build them, what's the worst that could happen? Narrator: The Matoran then built the Bohrok and unwittingly...UNLEASHED THE BUTTERFLIES. All six Bohrok in unison: We are the Bohrok. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. Tahu: What's assimilation? Narrator: The Bohrok then began to destory the house, using their powers of acid, fire, water, and other stuff. Tahu: Let's go warn the Matoran and Turaga, these Bohrok are out of control. Narrator: The Toa then made a tactical retreat. That is to say, they ran screaming like little girls. Nokama: You built the Bohrok?! Tahu: It was Lewa's idea! Lewa: You agreed! Tahu: No, I didn't! Lewa: Yes you did! Narrator: Then, the wise Turaga broke up the cat fight. Nokama: You two should be ashamed of yourselves, acting like newly formed Matoran. Narrator: Then the brilliant Vakama came up with a plan to trap the Bohrok outside. Vakama: I know, how about we trap the Bohrok outside in the giant garden! Tahu: You mean the yard. Pohatu: How shall we get them outside, oh wise Turaga? Vakama: I don't know, must I think of everything!? Wait! I've got it! Live bait! Jala can stand outside and look appetizing and when the Bohrok go outside to eat him, we'll slam the door shut. Jala: Eat me?! Tahu: Uh, how does Jala get back inside? Nokama: Or, we could use the krana as bait? Vakama: That works too. Gali: Wait, so those organic masks, or krana, as you call them control the Bohrok? Vakama: Yes, we learned that by, um, studying them, yeah. Narrator: Vakama's brilliant plan worked perfectly. But when the Bohrok ravaged the yard, they created a swamp, which attracted the mosquitoes. *end flashback* Vakama: The end. Giant: *picks up Bionicles and puts them in their canisters/boxes* Well, I guess we'll be back here in a week when the exterminator's gone. To the cabin in the mountains, hurray! End Chapter 5

URL: http://www.bzpower.com/board/index.php?showtopic=9474 Name: The Legend of the Bionicle...Toys Author: ToaKapura1234 Status: Beginning Chapters to be reviewed: 1-5.

2 Chapters in one day, crazy right? Chapter 4: The Great Masks of Shinyness Tahu: Look, the giant left some boxes of Kanohi lying around. Vakama: *opens one box* Agh, Kran-err strange organic masky thingys. We Turaga will lock these away and um, study them, yeah. So don't wear them, got it? Everyone but Onua: Got it. Onua: *gives a thumbs, err claws up* Vakama: Lewa? Lewa: Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't wear the weird organic masks, check. Kopaka: Whoa! These bags contain the silver and gold Kanohi! Gali: But some are doubles and some are missing. Jala: Giant coming! Play dead. Giant: *Stages a giant battle where Rahi eat all the Turaga, half the Matoran and Onua* Oh, well I guess I'll take the extra Kanohi to school and trade them for the ones I didn't get, just like with the other masks. *One day passes* Vakama: Now that you have the golden Kanohi, you can merge and become the Toa Kaita, Wisdom and Valor. Tahu: Cool. Tahu, Pohatu, and (gasp) Onua: Spirit of Valor, hear me. Lewa, Kopaka, and Gali: Spirit of Wisdom, hear me. *nothing happens* Lewa: I think the spirits are deaf. Nokama: Plan B *The Turaga quickly disassemble the Toa, without asking, and use the instruction manuals to rebuild them into Wairuha and Akamai* Akamai: Come brother, let us descend into the lair of Makuta. Vakama: Wait, Wairuha take the silve Miru. Wairuha: But I like the gold one. Vakama: Too bad it's supposed to be silver. Wairuha: Fine. *As the Kaita approach the basement door, they are attacked by Muaka and Kane-Ra* Jala: We'll hold them off. *He and the other Matoran use their instruction booklets to merge into a Matoran Nui and hold off the Rahi* *Akamai and Wairahu descend into "Mangaia" and meet the two Manas* Akamai: CHARGE! *An epic battle ensues, but the Manas gain the upper hand* Wairuha: Look, the remote controls! Akamai and Wairuha: *run up to remote controls* Akamai: Hey, it's just like a video game. *Akamai and Wairuha have the Manas fight. The batteries die before one of them wins* Wairuha: Ah, phooey. Well, I guess we better go find Makuta. *Trips and rolls into Akamai, destroying both* *The Toa rebuild themselves* Kopaka: That was Lewa's fault. Gali: Lewa, so you're the one writing the creepy love notes. Please stop. Tahu and Kopaka: *snicker and smirk* Tahu: *uses super speed to grab everyone's golden Kanohi* Lewa: Now, let's find Makuta. *The Toa look around and can't find Makuta* Tahu: Makuta's not here, let's leave. Lewa: An epic battle with a totally anticlimactic ending. Woot. End Chapter 4 Coming whenever I feel like it, Chapter 5: Beware the Swarm of Mosquitoes.

Chapter 3: Lewa Ruins Everything Lewa: So those boxes are those monster Rahi. Vakama: Actually as long as we don't build the crabby thingys and put the rusty masks on the big ones, we should be fine. Tahu: (looking at Rahi box) So that's a Tarakava Nokama: Yes, yes it is. *Nokama and Whenua divide up all of the Toa, Turaga, and Matoran into teams to build each rahi* Lewa: Okay, now we just have to finish Mooka and Kaneera or whatever their names are by putting on the rusty masks. *puts Infected Kanohi on Muaka and Kane-ra* Mostly everyone: Lewa, no! Onua: *shakes head* Nuju: Click Matua and Onewa: We finished the Manas that Lewa told us to build. Vakama: Run! *runs away* Muaka: *tries to eat Lewa* Lewa: Ah, it's eating my face! Tahu: How many times do we have to tell you? It's a mask! Lewa: No, I'm pretty sure it's eating my face too. Pohatua: *saves Lewa from Muaka's jaws using his Kakama* Lewa: I'm sorry I called you fat, now RUN! Everyone but Vakama who already ran: *runs away* Tahu: Lewa, didn't you hear Vakama tell you not to use the rusty masks or build the crabs? Lewa: I thought he said only do that. Tahu: *puts head in hands* Matua: Look-see at what you have done you baboon-ape! *The Toa, Turaga, and Matoran manage to escape the rahi and learn to avoid them over the next week* Kopaka: The Manas have taken up guarding the entrance to the underground. Vakama: If any of you had paid attention during my telling of the Legend of Mata Nui, you would have known that the Manas guard Teri- err I mean Makuta's underground lair, Mangaia. Lewa: Does this mean Makuta is living in the basement? Tahu: Well, since we've all manage to get all of our masks we should be able to face Makuta. Nokama: No, we must wait for the Golden Kanohi. To be Continued with an epic Kaita showdown where the fate of the storyline continuity rests in the balance.

Woohoo! I got a fan. P.S. Did you get the Metru Nui reference? P.P.S. Nokama and Whenua aren't senile, at least. Chapter 2: FOOD!!! Pohatu: Okay, since he's about to throw away the mysterious smiling box with food in it, I'm going to use my Kakama and err borrow what's left. Tahu: Pohatu, how many times do we have to tell you that fried food is unhealthy? Pohatu: But it tastes so good! *speeds away* Tahu: *sighs* Pohatu: *comes back with french fries, a mcnugget, and plastic bag with pieces of plastic in it* Tahu: What's in the bag? Pohatu: (while eating) I dunoo, ky don wou chek? Tahu: I can't read these weird symbols. NOKAMA! Nokama: What?! I was getting my beauty sleep. Tahu: Translate this. *hands Nokama bag* Nokama: Ahem. Tahu: Translate this, pleeaase? Nokama: Fine. It says "Tohunga Maku" Nokama: Ooh, it's Maku. But what's a Tohunga? Nokama: EVERYBODY MEETING! *All of the Toa and Turaga who aren't present appear* Vakama: What's a Tohunga? Whenua: I think it's Tarakavan for Matoran. Tahu: What's a Tarakava? Matua: *chuckles* A proffessional boxer. Tahu: Ooookay. *Meanwhile Gali has already built Maku* *Nokama then introduces Maku to the group* Maku: I don't think we're in Mata Nui anymore To-, Turaga. Matau: Amazing-great, first Tohunga now-currently Toturaga. Lewa: Why are you so redundant?! Matau: Why-how are-is you-Toa not-isn't? Lewa: That doesn't even make sense! Matua: Speak-says you. Lewa: Whatever. *Later the Toa recover Onepu, Huki, Jala, and Matoro from Happy Mea- I mean mysterious red food-boxes* Kopaka: Look, another box. Jala: Please be Hahli, please be Hahli, please be Hahli. Tahu: You have a problem. Alrighty, Lewa it's your turn. Lewa: *climbs up table-leg, err I mean tree and while the giant looks away climbs into food-box, builds Matoran and carries out...KONGU!* Jala: Phooey. Giant: *picks up Lewa* Oh there you are. I've been looking for you and your team all day. Matua: Kongu over here fast-quick. Kongu: *runs over to Matau and joins the group* Giant: (still holding Lewa) Guess what? I got some vicious Toa-eating rahi for you to play with? Isn't that fun? Wait. Why am I talking to a Lego? Whatever, It will still be fun having the giant monstrous rahi trying to eat the Toa. Lewa: *gulp* To be Continued