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Arch-Angel

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Blog Entries posted by Arch-Angel

  1. Arch-Angel
    I don't even know why I'm bothering with my blog NOW.
     
    I'll just tell you to get it off my shoulders.
     
    Today started off as usual. My sleep is diprived as I'm reading the book 'Jumper' that the movie was orginally made from. Though I don't know the acccuracy from the two, 'Jumper' is a good book. Which is why I'm up until 1 AM reading.
     
    So I get up at 5:40 AM (clock is 20 minutes fast so it reads 6 AM to physicologically rush me in the morning) and I do my rountine. Bathroom, clothes, frosted flakes with milk bound to expire (that'll be a fun day), and all the things I need.
     
    I get to school and know I'll have work to make up from my absence yesterday. During lunch though, a friend of mine named Tito starts trash-talking about how he made me tap out in some playful grappling (basically amatuer wrestling without the style) and it was before Biology, I lefted him p with bare strength and could've slammed him down and chose not to. Considering the teacher would walk in and give me a detention right off the bat, I tapped.
     
    Now... he hasn't stopped talking about it. And continues to talk in lunch. So, with splitting headache and all, I challenge him. After school, meet in the front entrance.
     
    3 PM, he shows up, and the Aleve a friend of mine gave was helping quite a bit. We walked to the field arcoss the street from where his friends are playing 'Suicide' and others just hanging out.
     
    I take off my polo, empty my pockets, stretch a bit, and we start. After we broke up from the first round, my lip starts bleeding a lot. During on of his moves (possibly the DDT), my front teeth came down on my bottom lip, cutting it open. I suck on it a bit a spit on the ground.
     
    We go a second time, and when I found a moment I could take him down, I got on top of his back and into a headlock. After a few seconds of squeezing, he tapped. Though the tap was only viewed from my eyes, I know I won dispite what his friends didn't see.
     
    Right now we're even. No need for a thrid round to prove who's better. He's talking about how he cut my lip and all because he just can't come out saying he lost. Apparently thats too much for him.
     
    I just know I beat him. Not the biggest challenge, but I beat him. (expect a Rond Three tomorrow if he keeps talking)
     
    Before all this, in English class, my teacher wants to know whats up with my homework, and my failing grade. I simply told him, "I'll have my essay in tomorrow."
     
    "Good man."
     
    Fast forward presently to the story from before, and fast forward. 4 PM I get home in my not so cozy apartment and look around the blogs. I'm exhausted (sleep deprived and grappling, do the math) and I walk over to where my mom is on the couch and plant myself there for a nap.
     
    A four and a half hour nap.
     
    It was 9 PM, I'm a bit mad my mom didn't make an effort to wake me up. I have my dinner, come here, look at the latest blog entries from the one I left off, and get on my blog. I noticed Valenti's comment, and I thank him for his approval.
     
    I click the entry button on top, click 'Add Entry' and I know I should be doing that 4-5 paragraph essay on Brutus' character in William Shakespeare's 'Julius Caesar'.
     
    The instant I click the button, my teacher (in my head) shouted, "Moron!" like he does to some of the students.
     
    No, he isn't a bad teacher, but he isn't stupid whatsoever. He likes to challenge you, which I like in a teacher. If he must use an insult (more like show who fits the description in class) he will.
     
    So right now, Mr. McNeill is shouting in my head. My conscience is right next to him, slapping me upside the head.
     
    Ugh... Better do that essay...
     
    ~AA
  2. Arch-Angel
    Songs I listen to on the treadmill:
     
    Far Away by Nickelback
    Thunder by Boys Like Girls
    On Top of the World by Boy Like Girls
    Ocean Avenue by Yellow Card
    The Rock Show by Blink 182
     
    All. Love. Songs. Suggestions greatly appreciated.
     
     
     
    I think I've found a drive to my Summer Marathon, you know, something to keep me going.
     
    I imagine myself in one of the most popular marathons among athletes, The Boston Marathon. When I was a tot, my parents brought me to the marathon as it crossed through our town, and when we lived in the ghetto, it was only a block away. The runners run 26 miles in the cold, sometimes raining, sometimes against mixed showers, in the cold to prove only one thing: that they could do it.
     
    I've never, ever thought I'd consider running the marathon.
     
    For the past three runs on the treadmill, I've imagined a prize at the end of the 26 miles.
     
    Her.
     
    I don't care about no cash prize or finally being the dude to beat Robert K. Cheruiyot (winner of the last Boston Marathon, and I believe all the other ones. You know him as the Kenyan with the funny shoes), or proving to myself that I can do it.
     
    All I do is imagine myself running down the final stretch, sprinting, only running because I know she's there, and Robert K. Cheruiyot and I are neck and neck. The people are cheering, my Zune is blaring, Robert is making these loud puffing sounds that are annoying and he arms are moving so fast his sweat is hitting me which is completely disgusting, I got a cramp in my rib, my knees are killing me because the Mueller Knee Braces have met their days back at Heartbreak Hill, and my throat is cold from the frigid air. I'm sweating buckets and my body is constantly screaming swear words at me with each beat of sweat.
     
    As me and multi-time marathon winner close in on the finish line, kicking it up a notch with a sprint, I see one face running out of the crowd.
     
    My body forgets about the pain, that, or my brain put those nerves on hold. I pass my competitor, about to think home the victory. I was going to make history. My name would be in the papers, the TV, across the nation (even for a short 15 minute segment), and all over the state.
     
    She goes under the tape for the winner to cross, and runs towards me.
     
    I slow down, and pick her up in a swooping hug, feet away from the finish line, and we kiss for the first time.
     
    Robert passes the finish line, taking the wreath woven from olive branches and the money, and wins yet another Boston Marathon.
     
    But...
     
    I got the girl.
     
    We cross the finish line, hand and hand, and after a shower, I take her out to lunch.
     
    Sure, my body's exhausted and I'll want to sleep forever, but I am NOT going to miss my first date with her!
     
    ~AA
  3. Arch-Angel
    Before, in the past, I believed this holiday to be one of peace, giving thanks, and eating until my stomach nearly bursted.
     
    This year, I have had little peace, few things to be thankful for, and I'm not hungry...
     
    If you noticed, I haven't done a blog entry on any holidays. I told you the ones of the past, the ones that were littered with family sorrow.
     
    When I thought that my life would go smooth and fine. When I thought that Christmas 2006 would be fun. This day marks the anniversary of when I thought that my parents would stay together.
     
    I'll tell you what I'm thankful for.
     
    I am thankful for not living on the streets. I am thankful that I'm a Believer, I am thankful for my girlfriend Bionigirl, I am thankful for my friend Taki, I am thankful of my friends in my old town, and I am thankful I have some friends in my new school.
     
    What I'm not thankful for?
     
    I am not thankful for living in an apartment that gives me as much freedom to the outside to that o a prison. I am not thankful for the fact this Christmas might be more of a disappointment then last year's. I a not thankful that I still have to deal with the fact that my parents are divorced and I don't hear the end of it.
     
    The Holidays to disappoint are upon me yet again...
     
    Happy Holidays everyone, I hope you'll enjoy it more than I will...
     

  4. Arch-Angel
    Because so many of you have absolutely no idea who Bionigirl is... I did this for Dok via PM, but I guess it all of you need to know.
     
    Back in 2003, I was playing in the first Code: Lyoko RPG in the Completely Off Topic section. During that time, I grew up as a writer and as an role player, and thank it for it's creation, for more than a few reasons. The best?
     
    I met her.
     
    BZP member Taki had a friend who liked Code: Lyoko as well, and had her come on BZPower to play in the RPG. We talked very few times as the years went on, but in all the conversations, they lasted for quite a while.
     
    Last year, I felt horrible. Life was going now the drain, I was becoming an introvert yet again, and I was moving back into a town I've got some bad blood with. Taki, now my best friend and brother in Christ, knew someone else with difficulties in their own life. He gave me the AIM screen name, Bionigirl, and I put it on my buddy list. She IMed me first, so obviously Taki suggested me to her as well.
     
    We talked, we laughed, we shared moments with each other, and we both realized one thing: We felt love.
     
    It was strange, I'll admit. I've had many crushes (and I mean crushes </3) on many girls in the past. A few relationships, but I broke them because there was no spark. It wasn't true love, those past relationships.
     
    Now, I'm talking to a girl in Illinois who was as sweet as an angel, and felt like a gift from God Himself. Within two days... long-distance relationship.
     
    I talked to her regularly, and with a few bumps on the road taken away, we finally hit a mountain.
     
    You see, Bionigirl is in foster care. When she was younger (about 13), her parents abandoned her and her sister thinking that they were doing drugs thanks to her brother trying to save his own hide. Many other problems occurred, and they put her and her little sister in foster care. They were adopted, for a time, and around December, she was taken from her parents and put into foster care yet again, thanks to her original parents wanting her back (they lost the case, but were able to get her out of the foster parents' home). Ever since, she's been going to different orphanages and foster homes across the states (not Alaska or Hawaii).
     
    So here we are. Once in a great while, she'll be able to get her laptop back from lockup and find some miracle to connect to the internet, and talk to me.
     
    Like today, right now. =)
     
    ~AA
  5. Arch-Angel
    I can't believe its been two days since one of the funnest days I ever had in my life. WOO!
     
    Sorry, still got me some excitement flowing. Lemme give the pics...
     

    My girl Karen (Unoffical, but I plan to pop the question)
     

    The kid on the far right has no idea whats going on...
     

    One of my favorites...
     

    Me and my friend Meg
     

    (Was going to pop the question, but a guy named 'Colin' beat me to it by a week... did I mention he wears girls' jeans for some reason?)
     

    Hendrick to the far left, Danielle, Me, Amy, and Kaleigh
     

    Karlee, Meg, Lauren, Me...
     

    Yes, we have fireworks too.
     

    Some people partied TOO hard...
     
    But the one pic that I love the most is...
     

    Well, aside from my friend Jeremie, its me and Karen.
     
    Post comments, questions, criticism, insults...
     

  6. Arch-Angel
    Yang represents good in the symbol.
     
    With yang days, I find it hard to blog about them that day. These events took place yesterday.
     
    I woke up to the sound of laughter. The Remiro & Pebbles Hip-Hop Morning Show from 6AM to 10AM was on as they talk to their intern Problem Child (They gave him that nickname) about how he can't get a girl because he always messes up whenever talking to them. It was 5:40 AM, so they are playing a recording from yesterday's show. I get up, and get to the bathroom. Once back, fresher and more awake, I start dressing while continuing to listen to the soon to be playing morning show. Once dressed, deodorant and all, I my glitchy mp3 player that refuses to connect to the computer, nor have the playlist in the order I made. If I want to listen to some more rock, it'll go on to a slow love song (though that was before the malfuctioning). I placed it on the FM radio, never taking it off JAM'N 94.5, the station Remiro & Pebbles broadcast from.
     
    I break open a fresh box of Frost Flakes with a reduced amount of sugar (which has more benefits in it and less of the fattening stuff than the Special K Vanilla Almonds I used to get... yes, I'm trying to eat healthy.) I have my breakfast, got my things, and by 6:48AM, I grab a washed green apple and head out my door... into the corridor of the first floor apartment.
     
    Don't you hate the meaningless two paragraphs I put up there?
     

     
    As I walk towards the bus stop, I notice as I'm descending down the hill my apartment is on top of.
     
    Traffic.
     
    Backed up all the way to the bus stop.
     
    I, of course, am laughing quietly. It would be a shame to come into school late for homeroom or the middle of first period because of Route 9 backed up more than a truck stuck in reverse.
     
    By the time I get to the bus stop, the traffic is further down the road. If the bus ends up in this, we'll definitely be late for school.
     
    Time goes by, and I mean it. The bus is usually here around 6:55AM. Never anything over 6:59AM.
     
    It was 7:00AM.
     
    I call Josh, a friend on the bus who is the first to get picked up.
     
    "Yeah, the bus isn't even here yet. Oh wait, here it is!"
     
    Fifteen minutes later (what should've been about five) The bus is itching its way around the curve of the road. Another two to three minutes pass before finally it got onto the thrid lane to come up to the apartment entrance where the bus strop is located.
     
    I talk to my friend Josh who is milking out every bit of fun he can from being stuck in traffic. As we close in on traffic lights, he noticed the Tracker Trailer behind us.
     
    "HONK THE HORN!" He started saying loudly. Of course he gets the attention of everyone on the bus, and they're thinking ,'Oh gosh...'
     
    After twenty seconds of giving the motion to honk the horn while saying it loudly, he gave up.
     
    Another five seconds...
     
    *honk**honk*
     
    The entire bus started laughing.
     
    We get to school at about 7:45 or so, and first period was already starting. Of course we don't take the side-entrance so just imagine a bunch of kids coming in the front door and all the students turning to you as they walk... eyes on you...
     

     
     
     
     
    It was funny. Josh said we were VIP. (Apparently 'Very Important Pimps')
     
    As the day went on, everything went fine. Mr.McNeill was out today so even he couldn't bring me down.
     
    As my six foot seven, 320 pound African-American friend who's name is all too common... Josh (I know three or four Josh's in this school. Five if you count the one in my old town) would say:
     
    'The chi is pretty good today.'
     
    I'll talk about his chi thing in a distant entry.
     
    Today and yesterday have been peaceful. Got to love it...
     
    ~AA
  7. Arch-Angel
    I don't know what to celebrate anymore. I mean, I'm more than happy that I celebrate a holiday for its true meaning about the Son of God coming to Earth to save us and not a jolly old fat man that should be charged for breaking and entering every year on the 25th of December. You'd think that if we know where he's going to be, we'd catch him by now.
     
    ...What?
     
    The point is, as a kid, Christmas would be a great time of year. Warm cozy home, comfortable, family love...
     
    Now cold apartment, uncomfortable, chores, family torn apart by sorrow...
     
    The background music of a day at the beach playing on my new, bought used, Kingdom Hearts game I got myself yesterday at Gamestop...
     
    Makes me want to go throw rocks at Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen.
     
    How do you freakin' get off this island?! (Kingdom Hearts)
     
    Well, Merry Christmas everyone. Cause mine won't be.
     
    Where's Karley?
     

  8. Arch-Angel
    Just looking back at it, I remember perfectly saying to myself," I hope this week doesn't go bad."
     
    Well, should've knocked on wood, 'cause it did.
     
    Monday was normal. Rountine, but peaceful. Hung out with my friends Sarah ad Hendrick, two Haitians who I've known since the 7th Grade (Hendrick in the 6th), and when the two are together, I can't help but laugh my butt off and have a good time.
     
    Tuesday was very busy day. Weirdly enough, fun also (and stranger, on 9/11). It was down pouring and our Gym class (last period) got out early so Sarah, Hendrick, our Keyan friend Bradley(We call him JJ, dunno why), and the new girl from the town I'm moving back to ironically, were hanging out under the incline laughing and all. Mom picked me up, brought me to my friend's house three towns away within an hour so I could go to American Eagle with a coupon thing. By 8 PM, I buy the pants, Kanye West's Brand New CD "Graduation", and out the mall doors.
     
    Wednesday was the big day. Brazil vs. Mexico at the Gillette Stadium!
     
    Mind you, we have few Mexicans in MA, and near half the population is Brazilian. The Stadium was full! I remember the number... 64,585 people in that Stadium... The largest amount of people ever to come to a Soccer Game in the Stadium's history.
     
    Brazil lost to Mexico twice in the past and the rivalry was growing. I'll give a percentage point from the people in the Stadium.
     
    Brazilians: 80%
    Mexicans: 15%
    Others: 5%
     
    Well, by the time Brazil got its second goal, the Mexican in front of us took off his Mexican Soccer Jeresy ad under with a Wife Beater and started cheering with us," Brazil! Brazil!"
     
    Hilarous.
     
    Brazil won 1-3, even with a dirty ref. One of the Mexican players jumped and grabbed the ball, ticking off the Brazilian team, the Brazilian crowd, the anyone watching it on TV around the freakin' world! Thats an instant kick-out from the game! One of Soccer's bggest no-no's! The cursed red card from the offical!
     
    And even as it was plainly in his sight, he claims he didn't see it.
     
    Now by this time, a lot of Potuguese swears came about the ref.
     
    All in all, we still won and left happy.
     
    Thursday is where I had the fall of the happy week. Fun because I came back from hanging out with Tom(The popular kid I talked about before) going into a trail in the woods. Now, he isn't too bright, so he wasn't paying attention too well when I told him what Hendrick said about him as a joke. He got the joke word-for-word, but not the end part where I told him "Don't tell him I said that".
     
    By Friday, he told him. Now Hendrick likes to think things a bit too over-the-top than they should be. Now he is convinced that I talk trash behind his back, but he has a reason not to trust me. He won't even come near someone else if I'm with them, nor does he care if I get arrested for something I didn't do.
     
    I tried saying sorry, and he's taken it like I offered him a hot bag of dog poop.
     
    The thing is, this is 8th grade drama. Nothing like his happened since the 8th grade (with half the drama was started by him in the first place). It happened before, and its over. Its quite sad he's doing it again.
     
    Anyway, what makes it even worse, I can't go near Sarah or JJ anymore without a glare wishing I'd get tossed into the Pits of Hates (Which is a bit more terrible than my current life).
     
    And yes, I did use every ounce of self-control not spill my water bottle in his face when it started.
     
    And my life is a mess yet again...
     

  9. Arch-Angel

    Quick! Important!

    By Arch-Angel,

    I'm writing an essay on Macbeth. The teacher asked to also note every simple sentence in our essay.
     
    Someone find the definitions of simple, compound, and complex, and hurry! I haven't much time, as its due tomorrow!
     
    ~AA
  10. Arch-Angel
    NOTE: Suggestions of 'Song of the Day' are much obliged, so if you have a song thats clean or mostly clean of swears and/or profanity (rap/Hip-Hop/R&B allowed of course), than PM it, and it might become 'Song of the Day'. INCLUDE WHY YOU THINK IT SHOULD BE SotD.
     
    Today's song goes out to all the young mothers out there who had to face this tribulation. It covers different situations from different points of views. In ths case, different artists joine in.
     
    What I like about this song is that its mostly clean and has a meaning to it. Then again, thats what people loved about the now passed-away main artist of this song.
     
    Baby Don't Cry by 2pac.
     
    ~AA
  11. Arch-Angel
    Today was...
     
    A filler.
     
    I stayed home today, reason being is that the tail bone infection has ensured a school chair would bring mountainous amounts of pain. Got a little cabin fever...
     
    Tomorrow at 1:30 (PM, not the one in an hour and thirty minutes) I meet a surgical doctor so he can analyze my infection. Needless to say, it will be painful and worse, it'll cost money.
     
    I've made a list of all the songs I have for SotD and I have enough until 49 so far from the ones I regularly hear, not including the one's suggested. Expect it to regularly come by.
     
    I've done my dishes, done what I wanted on the internet, said happy birthday to two fella, and I should call it a day. I hate short entries like these. So unnecessary yet unfortunate...
     
    Maybe tomorrow I can write about something lengthy. Until then, good night (or good morning)...
     
    ~AA
  12. Arch-Angel

    Omi Gets Punk'd

    By Arch-Angel,

    First, confessions.
     
    Two things.
     
    One, I am a bit... jealous.
     
    I don't have a recent game console nor the money to have and play Brawl. (And yes, I lied. I never played Brawl. Forgive me.)
     
    Two.
     
    Come on guys, after three blog entries, I know Botar died. No need to remind me.
     
    Though I ask, how did he die? Just out of curiousty. Can someone take the section from the book and put it on this beautiful, colorful, one-minded, happy blog?
     
    Oh, and Omi gets punk'd here.
     
    ~AA
  13. Arch-Angel
    Sabado is Saturday in portuguese.
     

     
    Today marks the day my dad said he'd get my sister what she wanted when she was a little kid. Everytime she asked, he'd not only deny her, he'd insult her. Sure, it was a joke. To him. She always remembered.
     
    She texted me from Brazil asking me what dad's cell number is. They don't keep in contact much.
     
    I gave it to her.
     
    He should be crying right now like he was last year.
     
    Why?
     
    He made a promise he couldn't keep.
     
    Like the same promise twenty-one years ago at the altar with my mother.
     
    A promise he couldn't keep.
     
    To have and to hold, from that day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do them part.
     
    Hallelujah Saturday holds many sorrows.
     
    ~AA
  14. Arch-Angel
    Right now, there is some kind of stress in my life I never before faced (never being in this position) and I have a lot of worry over a few friends of mine. Right now, I'd like it to be between me, Taki, Tee, and Bionigirl. A lot of it has to do with the very fiber of my being, and a lot of mental thought must be placed for this. All I ask for is some prayer and maybe a few song suggestion to help ease the pain.
     
    Thanks guys.
     
    ~AA
  15. Arch-Angel

    They Need A Names

    By Arch-Angel,

    Afew days ago, while talking to Exo via blog entry, the discussion of remembering eachother as newbs came up, and she (or is it he? I'm befuzzled) said that she remembers me as a newb as well.
     
    How did I reply?
     

     
    Her/His response: XD
     
    This image was created during Spanish Class last year in November. I didn't understand a lick of what the teacher said and considering we had these boards and eraseable markrs he handed out, it was born.
     
    Of course my classmates laughed. Its just random and is better than 'wat?' in any different ways. Not to menton the face.
     
    Eariler today (actually, 30 minutes ago) had a conversation with Sora on AIM.
     

    I made fun of him.
     
    His reponse: XD
     
    So, considering thse fellas brings the laughs out of us, I decie, why not name them?
     
    ... But does anyone gots a name for them?
     

  16. Arch-Angel

    Why Did I Cry?

    By Arch-Angel,

    RRRAAAHHH!!
     
    Basically what I yelled continiously facing my 300-pound partner. Today we cut down a bit on the excerise and did combat moves, and then combat.
     
    The pressures of life had me thinking. All I had to do for wrestling to be an asset to the team, which is hard. 100 bucks to stay, can't get a job, and I got to be there every weekday and all.
     
    I wanted to quit.
     
    I talked to the assistant coach I went up against (last entry) and told him. He said to stick around for this practice and if it was to be my last, to make it good. So I did.
     
    As practice moved along, I'm paired with one of the few heavweights. I'm in weight class 215, and I am exactly 215 pounds. He's 300 pounds.
     
    So the combat moves require lifting the opponent up a bit to get them off their feet and their back on the mat.
     
    So I'm slammed down 15 times getting crushed...
     
    Most painful injuries was just the burns of sliding on the mat a bit. Others include my elbow getting under my back and landing on just my ribs.
     
    "Come around!" Shouts my coach.
     
    We get there.
     
    He starts reading his paper. He thinks for a while.
     
    "Combat! If you want to leave, then leave! I only need 14 guys for a team!"
     
    Kind of felt something directed towards me.
     
    I stayed. I wasn't going to let a 300 pound freshman leave without having some fight inside of me unleashed.
     
    Constantly being pushed over the line, I've unleashed the animal in me and slammed the wall hard with my hand. I know he was winning. I know I didn't have a chance to get to win. It was 20-0.
     
    He pushed me out another two times, then I finally I got my elbow right to his face to back him up passed the line.
     
    1 point.
     
    "Whats the score?" He asked, breathing hard.
     
    "Who cares? You win, I lose."
     
    Going back to the center of the circle, we go at it again. Once we broke up, I charged for a hard push, he held his ground, and gave a hard push as I was in mid-run.
     
    I hugged my ribs. My back hit the ground hard. He won. It was 10 points to get the person on the mat entirely, and he did. I got up, he patted me on my back with his sweaty hand, and the loser (me) went go do 50 pull ups.
     
    A fellow wrestler held me feet and told me how to get a harder workout from it, and helped me up.
     
    After getting a drink of water, I got a few nods from other teammates and shook hands with a teammate who's become a friend to me.
     
    I told my assistant coach I'm staying. Being an underdog is my place. A disadvantage is what drives me. Whther its height, skill, or weight (mostly height and weight), a fighting spirit goes on.
     
    Called my mom, tell her First-Year/Freshman practice is over, hanged out at the entrance, and listened to my music.
     
    As the rap on the radio played on, I liked the remix, but also started thinking about things.
     
    I haven't talked to Karley in a while. I had been crushed and man-handled by someone 300 pound freshman who nearly fractured a few of my bones, and I sucked it in when I hurt my ribs, which weren't . I have trouble walking because my legs still sore. I don't know if I can keep my grades up. I want to go home.
     
    I couldn't tell why. I just started crying. It got me really thinking. I can't tell why myself.
     
    What triggered it?
     

  17. Arch-Angel

    Get A Girl?

    By Arch-Angel,

    My heart aches a bit right now. Since I've moved, I haven't been able to talk or flirt with my crush.
     
    And I'm dying here.
     
    I yearn for starting school here, yet I don't. I feel like how my parents felt going into this country: A Fresh Start, Clean Slate, New Opportunities... but in a place where the Rules are different, People aren't like what you thought, and that you just don't belong.
     
    But I don't feel afraid for some strange reason.
     
    I don't know if I'll find someone I like (and not when I'm about to move) and that I truly understand and they understand me. My crush and I probably had something, not sure if she would've gone out with me or not.
     
    Well, I don't know whether I should be excited for the new school or not, but in any case, its impossible to escape the fact that probably Tuesday, I face a Whole New World...
     

  18. Arch-Angel

    4

    By Arch-Angel,

    Sorry about that. Chores can come and go as they please at midnight.
     
    Today started... tiring. I received only 6 or 6 and a half hours of sleep, which annoyed me that the sun as risen behind the clouds already and time decided not to take a break at 4 AM. My alarm is within five feet, clearly not arms length.
     
    I get up, listen to the radio DJ talk to a member of a local rap group, and I do my thing, awaiting for my ride to church with Guy (the man that brings me to church in my hometown) and his daughter.
     
    Isn't she cute?
     

     
    I know that girl is going to survive her cancer.
     
    Did I mention the many uses of a camera phone?
     
    To show you my uncomfortable sleep deprivation (which I can assure you comes back tomorrow at 5:40 AM), I entitle this...
     
    Without a Pillow
     

     
    My hands are in my pockets. And besides, this ain't a belly! Its a gas tank for the (butt)-whooping machine!
     
    Today just went slower and slower and so on and so forth...
     
    My days are usually FTB. For the boredom. To make this blog exciting to my readers, I try... I do...
     
    Not in homework though.
     
    I'm considering putting up a homework section on this blog to write essays, note take, et cetera, and send it to my teachers. Of course you guys can read it if it interests you and correct my mistakes... English will contain many essays. But I also need you guys to push me. Can you do that for me?
     
    ~AA
  19. Arch-Angel

    I Miss

    By Arch-Angel,

    I miss a lot of things.
     
    I miss working. The sun's rays coming down on me as I sweat my butt off doing landscaping, even if its simple weeds. Sweating going down my face as the day peaks at a hot 90 degrees...
     
    I miss the money I earned. Eight dollars an hour and no taxes in between because its somewhat under the table. My dad would get the check and cash it in, hand me about 300 dollars and I feel upper class for five minutes. Fifteen twenty dollar bills? It feels great.
     
    I miss having lunch with a lunch box. A sandwich made with turkey, ham, mayo, the works, and most of all, mom's love.
     
    I miss learning how to do things. How to make walls, how to lift heavy objects carefully, how to fix the small problems before they become big.
     
    I miss waiting for the day to end so I can come back home and go online to talk to friends. The anticipation for the weekend, the two days I have to spend with who I want if I can (so the weather chooses).
     
    I miss my dad.
     
    I miss him.
     
    I don't know why. I know I love him. I can admit that thanks to Necro in this entry.
     
    I guess ever since I yelled at him, its been let out. Like I actually have forgiven him. Maybe because I've been bottling it up this entire time and with it, a grudge.
     
    I think...
     
    I think I'm going to apologize for what I said to him.
     
    ~AA
  21. Arch-Angel
    EDIT: Why didn't any of you tell me I wrote 'mentally' as 'metally'? I knew I wrote something wrong...
     
    NOTE: I hate my keyboards. They miss every other letter whenItype. Including thesace button. If grammar andspellng go wrongin this entry, I'll have to re-readitall when ts done.This statement isn't currently being looed at, bu Im slaming o the keys as we seak.
     
    For those of you that have read my blog, you know the emotion I put into it. The thoughts, the humor, the expericences. I've shared with you how I had a descent life at one point and how it all came crashing down starting in between the hours of 1 and 2 AM of January 2nd, 2007. If you just started reading this because of the title, then thats okay. My life story goes with this entry entirely.
     
    On that night, things were rocky. Dad wasn't home. We just came back from a late night showing of 'Night in the Museum' starring the funny Ben Stiller. In my head, I thought things would eventually fall into place where everything would be alrght in a few days. My dad wouldn't be with that woman, my mom wouldn't be sad, there wouldn't be another Christmas without him.
     
    That night would prove to me that I was wrong.
     
    My father came through the door, full head of steam. My sister parked her car in the position so that he couldn't get in the driveway. Again.
     
    He's had enough.
     
    He goes up the stairs, bangs on my sister's door with his angry fists, ready to unleash a storm. He felt disrepected. He was being kept away from his home. The house that he has worked had to get, worked hard to keep.
     
    My sister had a very good arguement to back up her actions against him. He spent Christmas and New Years with this woman and her two kids. He stayed with her after work. He came back home regularly at midnight since the middle of November. He indirectly dropped us.
     
    My mind set wasn't the best. I thought that God would bring this to rest. That He would show my pastor of a father the wrong of his ways. What was doing, what he was losing. I thought of this as short-term drama. I knew little of long-term drama.
     
    I was about to expericence a crash course lesson on the subjects of "Long-Term Drama" and "Unpleasant Life altering expericences".
     
    This entry covers it all.
     
    That was the day I was kicked off my mental placement of life.
     
    I believe that inside, we all have an idea of our placement in life. What we are used to. Who we are with. When life gives you lemon and all. But when your whole thought process is offically punted off the Empire State Building you orginally were on, you fall faster and faster and hits the ground with a heck of an impact. The things you were used to, gone. The day-by-day rountine, changed. Your eyes have opened. Congrats, life has opened your blinded eyes and you offically know what emotional pain looked like.
     
    Now, think of this. When you tell of your expericence and receive the comment, "Well think of the people that have it worse than you. The homeless, the starving children in Africa, etc.'
     
    Has that made you feel better?
     
    It didn't make me.
     
    'Why not?' you might ask yourself, 'Why does that not help whatsoever in making feel better? The people who have the worse life could give?'
     
    Because thats not the case.
     
    The homeless have found ground. They might have been homeless for years. The starving kids in Africa might have been born into this lifestyle, its been their ground, its been their lives.
     
    You have lost the ground beneath your feet. You have lost what you had. In my case, I have never known the emotion surrounded by a divorce.
     
    Now I do.
     
    You see, its not what we expericenced, but how far down the pit we fell.
     
    'Isn't that the same thing?'
     
    No.
     
    I know this girl. A Model Prep. The kind of girl that has had little to no turmoil in her life to change the way see looks at things. Her parents might have been divorced at her young age, but she didn't have the mind-set to care. Her life has ran smooth so far. Wealthy family, expensive clothes, friends just like her, and laughs and proudly makes fun of everyone 'beneath' her. And enough vodka mixed with orange juice in between. Right now, Tom told me that she is getting drunk at a girl's house who has probably bought half the tequila in Mexico. Probably near a toilet bowl right now vomitting. Maybe she's out cold. Who knows? Her way of having fun. Its her placement.
     
    Now.
     
    What if that same girl were to lose everything she has? She has to move into an apartment complex, be in a school with no one like her (doubt it), lose someone as close to her as a sister/brother? No more wealth. No more close contact to friends. No more ground.
     
    Well, then life would've opened her blinded eyes, and offically knows what emotional pain looks like.
     
    Now many of you know exactly what I mean. Some of you have yet to reach this point in life, like that girl.
     
    Now comes the part where you grow.
     
    Finding ground in such a mess in like trying to find a piece of hay in a stack of needles.
     
    The first step is the step back. Look at everything. Review every single memory. The memories of your time when you were fine, before that dreaded day came. Look at that dreaded day. LOOK AT IT. The emotions, the pain, the sorrow, the agony.
     
    Now let it out.
     
    Cry. Sob. Mourn. Pray.
     
    You shouldn't keep it in. Countless will tell you not to hold in the emotions for good reason. Religious content removed. - Nukora
     
    If you have to cry, sob, mourn, or anything, then do it. Let it all out. Shout to the skys, shout to the world. But never keep anything in.
     
    When you do this, you'll know your placement. Its your rock bottom, and you must rise from it.
     
     
     
    Find ground.
     
     
     
    ~AA
  22. Arch-Angel
    Yesterday I talked to my mom about going to visit my old town. The town where I grew up mentally and gave me so much pain, I grew stronger.
     
    'Why would you want to go back to a town with that kind o memory?'
     
    Because if it wasn't for that town, I wouldn't strong, I wouldn't be able to live a social life, and I probably woudn't have much of anything on BZP.
     
    After much discussion, and me quietly arguing with them for about two hours, they finally get the message. My sister was in the same position I was in almost 5 years ago and she got to go to back to her town almost every freakin' day and then cry and complain once she got back home that she didn't live there.
     
    I'm the same age as she was back then, back in her hometown, and I have only dealt with the poblem. My sister didn't even freakin' go to school in the other town (my hometown) and give it a chance while I sit here now, attending the town's high school, having not gone to visit my home town in three, count them, three freakin' months. I deserve it.
     
    So around 5 o'clock, I get there.
     
    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
     
    I'm dropped off at my friend Tom's house, and we talk for about fifteen minutes befoe leaving. Stop by my other friend's work (Bionigirl, that would be Jess ) and then reach my friend Josh's annex(?) like one apartment home above a small business. Go there, talk for about an hour seeing if any of my other amigos could join. The Amigos happens to be all busy except Josh. Casey' at a party, Fernando's busy (I think), and Justin's mom probably sent him to help his stepdad with something. Justin's mom hates us, couldn't be more fake around us. I think she's okay with me. Dunno.
     
    Anyways, I want to send my time here like I did in the good ol' days. Head over to Neighbor Brick Oven Pizza!
     
    We walk in, guess who's there?
     
    Ten friends!
     
    Considering their wasn't an open table, we had to join in.
     
    Now Josh wasn't exactly the most social one in my many known friends. He has different views on life, if not better. He's techically a straightedge. Most of everyone around the table has gotten drunk more than once and the bottles hidden in the bushes to prove it. So I stickwith talking with Josh and the girl next to me (ironically named Karlee, so the entire time, I just wish Bionigirl there) and eat the food we ordered. Unfortunately, Tom did something to mix up everything on how we were going to pay. I have about 30 dollars. Josh didn't even put in any of his money, and Tom thought he did. He jut took the money out of my wallet I handed to him and ended up putting all the money I had to pay for the tab!
     
    Now I noticed this quick, because I wasn't going to get played like that by Tom's amazing skill at math[/sarcasm] so the four girls at our table started doing the math for us.
     
    I had a simple and perfect solution.
     
    Get back our orginal amount of money, and PAY FOR OUR OWN MEALS. Easy as that. I'm nt going to pay part of their food or drink.
     
    After 10 minutes of the most stressful and yet entertaining money math problems I have ever encountered, my plan works (finally).
     
    We head over to CVS with the four girls. All just friends, because I have Bionigirl, Josh isn't really looking, and Tom perfers a different gender if you know what I mean. So we buy the few things we want at CVS. Grabbed me a Pepsi and a pack of Mint Tridents, joke around a little and we take the discussion outside.
     
    Again, I'm not gonna drop Josh. I decide to talk to him more, and then comes the highlight of the night.
     
    12-21 New England!
     
    Sorry, watching the game.
     
    Four girls come arund the corner across the street (walking of course). I'm thinking, 'Funny, I don't know them...'
     
    Apparently everyone else but Josh and I has some relation to them.
     
    The say their hi's and continue walking, but goofing off, so they must be in middle school or something.
     
    But before they get out of earshot I yell, "Hey girl! How's that fine (butt) doing?"
     
    Everyone starts laughing their (butts) off. I had to leave this night with a memory.
     
    Hour later, I've gone to Josh's annex(?) and talked with his parents who are very friendly and fun to be around. Soon after I realize that it was 8:34 PM. I was suppose to leave 34 minutes ago.
     
    Whoops...
     
    I turn on my cell phone (techically my mom's Nextel. My phone commited suicide somehow) call my mom, who tells me that my dad was waiting at Tom's house, so I call him and tell him that I'll be in the Convience Store gettin candy before I leave.
     
    My dad comes in the store before I pay for the candy. Give him the regular hug, considering we don't see each other day by day (even though we saw each other last night watching Cloverfield).
     
    "Let's go? Everyone's in the car waiting."
     
    "Wait, what? You mean Elizabeth and..."
     
    "Yeah. Come on."
     
    I stop him.
     
    "Dad, I can't. Mom wouldn't forgive me."
     
    Dad gave me a strange look, "You don't need to tell her. Keep it a secret."
     
    "No dad. Mom and Karina (my sister) know when I lie. Remember when they ound out I went to the apartment?"
     
    "But you don't need to tell them."
     
    "I never told them. They just looked in my eyes. I promised mom I wouldn't get into the car if her or Gil, or anyone of them were inside."
     
    Dad wasn't happy. He was disappointed.
     
    "Then you're just gonna stay here?"
     
    "Yeah. Might sleep over josh's house or Mom could pick me up..."
     
    After a bit of a silence, my dad says, "Tell your mom I'm tired of playing her game."
     
    Whatever game that is.
     
    "Alright."
     
    He gives me a hug, then leaves.
     
    Josh only hear of the problems with my family through my words, but he got the 'pleasure' of witnessing it.
     
    I explained the problm to him on the way back to his place (techically only 30 yards away) and once p, I called my mom and explained everything.
     
    She picks me up a half-hour later, and tells me she's proud of my decision.
     
    I just feel I took another step into life for choosing by myself.
     
    Then today...
     

     
    THE PATS ARE GOING TO THE SUPERBOWL, BABY!
     

     
     
  23. Arch-Angel
    Their is one thing that troubles people on a daily basis. It stays in the back of their heads forever, but once it hops on the train of thought, it rushes through your mind, engulfing all concentration and stresses your body as it tries to finish the task at hand. This thing brings daily pains and worries, and is ultimately controlled by the authority that you must follow. They do not care what is going on in your life, not unless a higher authority says so.
     
    I do not have the explanation to the higher authority that would affect the authority. I am a victim.
     
    I absolutely hate these.
     

    » Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «Due dates  
    Research Paper on the physical effects of alcohol on the human body, DUE tomorrow.
     
    Thirty page chapter, read and Take-Home Quiz on 'Of Mice and Men'.
     
    Two chapters to read and take notes in History textbook.
     
    The equation comes up to...
     
    Another all-nighter.
     
    Anyone want to stay up until 4 AM on AIM for me is greatly appreciated.
     
    I think Lil' Wayne says it best with And I feel like dying... and I feel like dying...
     
    Then again, right after that, it says: Once only the drugs are done...
     
    ...
     
    Okay, the man looks like this:
     

     
    Any questions?
     
    ~AA
  24. Arch-Angel
    First day in my new town, and its about maybe... several time bigger than my last high school. I'm going to one of the large schools in the state of MA, and can't ever find my way t the gym.
     
    I'm probably smarter than some of my English Classmates because though I didn't even learn the Vocabuary, I finished the quiz before them and I was helping them cheat.
     
    10th History is what I learned last year, so I take a Juinor History Class next week and I don't take History my Juinor or Senior year! Woot!
     
    Yet to have Biology or Geometry...
     
    Well, only five periods a day and I've had four of them (one Study and the other Phys. Ed) so all and all, the educational part is taken care of.
     
    Now, my popularity...
     
    I got none.
     
    I was so used to knowing everyone, now only 3 people I know from the Fifth Grade and my Childhood Brazilian Friends are my only friends, and I don't even have a reputation with them.
     
    In my old town, I was freakin' praised for the crazy things I did. Clean Slates aren't my specialty.
     
    Hoping to gain more popularity...
     

  25. Arch-Angel
    WARNING: If you can stand to read a Bones Entry, then you can read. I just hope I keep your attention.
     
    Forgive me for not blogging when it happens on the same day. Its a problem I've been trying to work out.
     
    Last Sunday provided me with a final challenge before I was able to fall into a deep slumber to be awaken by JAM'N 94.5 with the Morning Show. The challenge?
     
    Getting to sleep.
     
    I truly am sleep diprived. I'm used to going to sleep by 11PM depending if I'm reading my book(s). Unfortunately, I wake up with the rising sun at 5:40AM every weekday. Due to this lack of sleep, I'm constantly being yelled at by my mom for taking 'naps'. Why won't she let me sleep to my heart's content?
     
    Because my biological clock believe in no naps. Its either 'out like a light' or 'hammer to the light bulb' (same conspect more or less).
     
    Because of this fatigue, I was plagued yesterday by memory loss. That day, my mind refused to dig through the files of last Thursday and beginning of Friday. I spent the day during my free time retracing my steps. First off, Friday Night Smackdown! was a memory I could start at. From there, I went back with TV shows, conversations, and other things. Notice that I have no blog entry on last Thursday for good reason. I missed the bus and my mom gave up on bothering to bring me there when she failed to lift herself from her bed because she was up until 4AM. What a role-model.
     
    The memory blank haunted me during my school day as I tried to see what I missed out from my education that my teacher(s) agree I won't need in the future.
     
    Though I had no idea what I missed in Geometry, that became my least concern when we got our latest test back from correcting. I was given an A+ for my effort with a beauty of a 96 per-freakin'-cent. Only two questions wrong because the first one was a trick question I almost got. The second I did again in my head, I found out. I was impatient with it at the time, because it was the multi-answer kind of question. The state test, the MCAS (would have a funny acronym inserted here but I failed doing so), have questions like that. Only on that test I take no joke towards. This is my final year taking it and I plan to get it off my shoulders once next week comes along and the pracitally considered holy test is taken.
     
    Its about as overrated as Hannah Montana and High School Musical. AND THATS OVERRATED.
     
    Right now I'm learning about the Civil Rights Movement. Rosa Park's refusal to go to the back of the bus, the N double-A C P (NAACP), Martin Luther King Jr., Malcolm X, the Little Rock 9, and what captured me the most...
     
    Sit-Ins.
     

     
    During one of the sit-ins, the four above sat on the counter seats and asked for their orders, but immediately the waitresses rounded up and went to the back. Why?
     
    They knew what was coming.
     
    Prior to this, they called the media. News stations and newspapers were given news of a sit-in. They weren't complaining, they were about to get something big!
     
    'Why? A bunch of people sit where they are wrongly told not to be is suppose to be big?'
     
    It is when a mob of white people formed.
     
    They grew up in an environment telling them they were superior than African Americans, Latinos, and just about every race but white. They couldn't tell you why. When one tried, they admit that they fail to give a good reason as to why. Its a strange hate. Its what they've been told was right for years! It physcology.
     
    Well, during the sit-ins and the forming of the mobs, all around them were angry shouts, shoves, racist remarks, and just about everything in between but the serving of food. Soon enough, as the African Americans stayed seated without giving a word to them or turning around but only to see if something was happening other than the current harassment, it broke out into violence. The protesters were taken off their seats and surrounded by angry white men who took it upon themselves to kick, punch, and basically beat them to a pulp. After a while, the State Troopers who should outside the window watching everything came in and took his time to stop the violence. He rested the protesting African Americans, the ones who done nothing but refuse to move from their spots in the diner, and they were found guilty of disturbing the peace and were sent to prison for I believe 33 days.
     
    That kind of thing is amazing. Watching the video of them getting stomped, hit in the head, beaten, and not fighting back? I'm sorry, but if that were me, I would've died because I would've punched, kicked, elbow, judo-chop Austin Powers style everyone around before being overpowered and most likely shot between the eyes.
     
    The day of learning would continue on towards Health class where we are now learning about stress and how to deal with it. Physcial, mental, emotional, et cetera (<- thats right, no etc. because I want to show I'm smart!). Some healthy things to do under emotional stress is vent, talk about it, don't harm yourself (cutting yourself, smoking, drinking, drugs ((why am I taking this class if I taught myself this AND live by it since I was freakin', I dunno, 8?)) ) and one of the best ways is crying. Obvisiously I support that part fully in this entry. Find the purple-colored text where Nukora edited out a part. *Knuckles Nukora* We still cool though.
     
    During one of times as I talk to Josh who's next to me about the Chi in everyone currently, and the room in general with whats being discussed, I turn and see my friend, Kat. Quiet, still, looking straight ahead, and the sun from the window providing light in the dark room (using a projector on the board) reflecting off the trail of a tear on her cheek. This isn't the first time is cried in class. During my first days in there, she walked out of class in tears. I ponder in my head as to the stress in her life. It makes me feel quite sad, because I used to constantly be in her position. I cannot count the amount of times I started crying in class. Most notable one was back in the sixth grade, where my dad said, 'Its like you're not my son anymore,' before I walked out of the car without bothering with a goodbye and eventually the emotional bleeding in my heart couldn't hold any longer and it bursted. Didn't make it 45 seconds in English before Ms. Duseano helped me up and brought me outside to await a couselor. Reason I remember that was because that day I got the best emotional help to provide. A special ed. teacher whom's name was Paula just told me everything I had to hear. She explained that adults sometimes say things they don't mean. It helped me more than I can imagine. If she ever reads this, I hope she knows that I'm entirely grateful in what she did for me.
     
    Everytime I see someone cry, I remember that day almost vividly.
     
    Saint Patrick, Saint Patrick...
     
    Why are you a saint again?
     
    I only celebrate the Holidays I have off, and I'm Brazilian, I look good in green, but have nothing in green to where on a day with the wind chill about 15 degrees.
     
    Instead I think of drunk small men who I'd love to have a conversation with.
     
    Leprechauns.
     
    I love them. They remind me of myself minus the green, small stature, hat and shoes, usual pipe, and a crotch filled with gold coins (and the price of gold is very high up! What is it like, an onuce is about a grand?)
     
    And they are considered male fairies mind you.
     

     
    There you have it. This should change that campaign around a bit.
     
    "Kiss me, I'm Irish!"
     
    "Stand still, I'm Brazilian!"
     
    "What?"
     

     
    ~AA
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