And the winner is Monsieur Grimm.

Chuck Norris vs. Abraham Lincoln

Imagine for a moment Chuck Norris running for president. Imagine the campaign slogans he'd have going for him! Yet, a bolt of lightning magically restarted Abraham Lincoln's heart (yes, I know this is unrealistic) and he's just as alive as he was moments before his death. Since the twenty-second amendment doesn't affect him, he runs for office again. There are no third party candidates. Who gets your vote?

Lincoln's beliefs run more in line with mine than Norris'. Ergo, Lincoln gets my vote.

ALSO. Chuck Norris isn't a political figure. He's a martial artist and actor. Lincoln's out of date, but he actually knows what he's doing.

And the winner is Monsieur Grimm.

 

Chuck Norris vs. Abraham Lincoln

 

Imagine for a moment Chuck Norris running for president. Imagine the campaign slogans he'd have going for him! Yet, a bolt of lightning magically restarted Abraham Lincoln's heart (yes, I know this is unrealistic) and he's just as alive as he was moments before his death. Since the twenty-second amendment doesn't affect him, he runs for office again. There are no third party candidates. Who gets your vote?

 

24601

I vote Lincoln. Proven effeciency, and besides, a fellow Illinoisan.

Chuck Norris.

He's everybody's master.

Ignoring the outcome of The Ultimate Showdown, I'd have to go with Lincoln. He's just so trustworthy. Look at that hat!

Abraham Lincoln. Looking forward to the movie about him coming out.

Can I vote for neither? I'm sure Lincoln could be a great president, but he was assassinated over 125 years ago. He would need some time to catch up on contemporary politics before getting anywhere near the presidency.

Can I vote for neither? I'm sure Lincoln could be a great president, but he was assassinated over 125 years ago. He would need some time to catch up on contemporary politics before getting anywhere near the presidency.

I was thinking this, but I'd still vote Lincoln.

Lincoln.

Chuck Norris vs. Abraham Lincoln? didn't Epic Rap Battles of History already do that like a year ago?

either way, Lincoln

Lincoln.

Chuck can't handle all that hat.

I'd actually vote for Mr. Norris. Lincoln is behind by about 150 years and has a lot of catching up to do. That, and I'm actually not all that romanticized by Lincoln's legacy. Perhaps that's because as far back as I can remember, my parents were highly analytic of him and pointed out various fault. he's a war hero, but somehow I don't think he'd be able to handle the economic issues of today. That, and I actually like Chuck Norris on some of his ideas.

Regardless, the vote is in and Lincoln won this election. Moving on...

HAL 9000 vs The Terminator

Running Mates: The Monolith and the John Conner, respectively. John Conner, though the vice-presidential candidate, is essentially running for president vicariously through his obedient protector. The Monolith, well, who knows what that thing's up to. It doesn't answer any questions, it presumably lost the vice-presidential debate. We only have a track record to look at, which is up to a lot of interpretation. I can only imagine how the Terminator/Conner side uses that to their advantage in their attack ads.

By all means, argue about this.

HAL 9000.

"I'm sorry Dave, but you can't win this election"

John Conner.

I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the election, Dave.

Uhhh...

So a robot who wants to kill humans vs. a robot who can be reprogrammed to kill humans.

I'd leave that section blank and just move on to the Senators...

Hal. He will accomplish his mission at any cost.

By the way, show of hands. How many have read 2001: A Space Odyssey?

By the way, show of hands. How many have read 2001: A Space Odyssey?

*hand*

I will read it sometime.

Here's just a thought, though, HAL 9000 doesn't want to kill humans. He's just dead set on his objective and gets rid of inefficiencies that are less important to maintain. Given his genius, he's probably the only person/thing that could effectively micromanage the entire economy if he deemed it necessary. I think the only people who would be at risk of death would be his cabinet, given that their human error would jeopardize his mission to effectively govern a nation for four or eight years.

The chances of reprogramming the Terminator are pretty small, too. The last I checked, reprogramming required physical capture and access to the hardware, and the chances of that happening to the the good old Governator aren't very likely, considering that not only can it take care of itself, but it has its own security guards.

HAL 9000 would definitely win in a debate, though. Yet, his record kills him again.

I vote Two-Face and Takutanuva as write-in candidates. They can handle bipartisanship.

And besides, I haven't watched either of those movies.

By the way, show of hands. How many have read 2001: A Space Odyssey?

I feel like I might be one of the few people who actually prefer the book.

Hal: 3

Terminator: 0

Write-ins: 2 (John Conner & Two-Face)

Nonvoters: 2 (ViP2 & Sumiki)

B6 vs. Dimensioneer

Again, we're talking about the presidency.

Dimensioneer.

He's just plain awesome, plus he created this wonderful site.

BOSSMAN

MANDREW

SIXERS

B6

SIXBOSS

Dimensioneer. Besides, B6 isn't old enough. =P